"That is the saddest, most beat-up hat I've ever seen."
Scott stared at Logan as the other man walked into the room. Logan was wearing a cowboy hat planted firmly on his head. "But at least it covers your hair."
"Don't knock the hat, One-Eye, the women love it."
"Maybe the women *you* know, but the X-Women are a little bit more discriminating."
Logan just smirked as he tugged down the brim. "Watch and learn, Scooter. The hat gets 'em every time."
***
Jean, Ororo, Rogue and Jubilee were in the kitchen, reading the latest issues of Cosmo, Glamour and People to be delivered to the mansion.
"Look at Katie Holmes' stomach! I'm telling you, that's an alien. There is NO WAY that is a normal human baby," Jubilee screeched, pointing to a picture of an extremely pregnant actress.
"Maybe it's a mutant," Jean said without looking up from Cosmo.
Ororo rolled her eyes. "I'd prefer to think that we have nothing at all in common with Tom Cruise, thank you very much."
Scott and Logan walked into the room, side by side. Scott went to the fridge to get a drink (and surreptitiously watch the women), while Logan leaned against the counter.
"Mornin' ladies," he drawled.
Rogue looked up. "Hey, sug..." She trailed off, robbed of the power of speech.
At her sudden silence, Jean blushed then raised her head, looking to see if Rogue's loudly broadcasted mental picture of Logan was accurate. She bit her lip. It was. Good Lord, it was. She kicked Ororo under the table, jerking her head in his direction.
Ororo looked at him. Her jaw dropped and she whimpered, a tiny little noise that only Logan and Rogue, with Logan's borrowed senses, heard.
In the total silence that surrounded the kitchen, the smacking of Jubilee's gum was even more apparent. She looked up at Rogue, then followed Rogue's line of sight until Logan's slouched form came into view. The next sound heard was an audible gulp as her gum was swallowed.
"Holy Mary, Mother of Jesus," Rogue whispered as Logan winked sexily at her.
All four women stared at Logan, who smirked back at them. He went so far as to hook his thumbs in his belt loops, allowing his hands to frame his enormous buckle. The temperature in the room rose rapidly.
"Ladies," he said again, nodded at them, and strolled out of the room.
Four sets of eyes followed his exit.
"Good Lord," Ororo muttered, "The view from the back is as good as the one from the front."
Scott winced.
Rogue had taken to fanning herself with the copy of Glamour in her hand. "Y'all...," she said, "All I have to say is he needs to wear that hat more often."
"He needs to wear that hat all the damn time," Jean said, leaning back in her chair. "I mean it. All the time."
"Jean!" Scott exclaimed, scandalized.
She looked at her husband in surprise. "Honey, when did you get here?"
Scott slammed his soda down on the counter and stormed out of the room.
"What got his panties in a bunch?" Jubilee asked Jean.
Jean shrugged. "Who knows. Somebody probably drank his favorite soda or something." She paused for a moment. "I wonder if Scott would wear a hat like Logan's?"
"I wonder if Logan wears it in bed," Jubilee asked.
All the women sighed, then everyone else turned towards Rogue.
"What!?! Don't look at me, I don't know." Then she smiled, a smirk worthy of Logan in its sheer deviltry. "But I plan on findin' out."
THE END!
The Wolverine & Rogue Fanfiction Archive
Barely Legal Since 2000
Author's Chapter Notes:
DISCLAIMER: All X-Men characters, concepts, etc. are copyright Stan Lee, Marvel Entertainment, and 20th Century Fox. This work is not-for-profit fanfiction, and no infringement is intended.
Inspired by the scan from this post. This story, if you can call it that, has no redeeming qualities whatsoever, but I had to write it.
Inspired by the scan from this post. This story, if you can call it that, has no redeeming qualities whatsoever, but I had to write it.