Breathing a sigh of relief Rogue slipped out of the small French house and headed for the stable. The soft sounds of horses stamping in their stalls echoed in the soft morning fog as she entered the exquisite stable to move along the stalls.
Pausing next to the second to last, she smiled at the dark head that poked out over the door and nickered at her, “Good morning,” she whispered softly. “Up for a ride today?”
“Can I help you?” the soft query drew her attention to the tall, slim figure in the open doorway.
“No,” Rogue replied stiffly, “I’ve got it under control.”
“Really?” the smooth, slick words did little to put her at ease, “I was hoping we could continue our conversation that was interrupted the other day.”
Rolling her eyes, Rogue shook her head, “There is nothing to continue. Excuse me, but I’ve got things to do,” opening the door to the stall she snapped a lead rope into the bay’s halter and led him out into the walkway. Ignoring the simmering blonde she led the gelding past him with a dark look and out into the yard.
“You’d be wise to leave her alone,” the cold, harsh words were barely loud enough to disturb the horses but it drew the blonde’s attention.
“Considering it wasn’t a public conversation…”
“You don’t get it, do you?” moving into view he glared at the rich man, “She’s out of your league, and you’d best remember that.”
“And who are you to tell me..?”
“Let’s just say a close, concerned man,” he drawled his hands clenched at his sides, “One that gives a damn about her, and doesn’t care about you.”
Shaking his head, he watched the shadow move out of the stable and disappear something telling him that he was better keeping his distance from the young lady who’d elected to take a morning ride.
Loping the bay along the path, Rogue pulled up and dismounted along the edge of a cliff. Staring off into the distance she smiled at the rolling hills with an edge of blue that could clearly be seen. Mr. M’s agreement of being friends and nothing more had been welcomed when he’d given it but it had bothered her since then.
Could it have been so easy for him to walk away, could he have been so emotionally detached that she was so easily forgotten? Yes it was flattering for him to pursue her, yes it made her feel special, sexy but realistically she knew deep down there had to have been something about him that had drawn her in the first place.
With a sigh she shifted, twisting the rein in her hand she merely had to figure out what it was about him that had worked its way under her defenses. Maybe once she understood that she could understand what it was about the situation that had her acting so differently than she’d ever believed.
“I love him,” Rogue whispered softly, “I really do, and it’s not just hero-worship like some people think. I mean I’ve seen his darkest fears, his worst crimes, and it’s never bothered me. He would risk it all for me,” she rubbed at her forehead, “Maybe that’s it. Maybe I’ve been looking at the situation wrong; maybe I’ve been trying to figure out what it was about him that I wanted. The only problem is that what I was offered, what he could give me, isn’t enough. I want what I had in New York.”
The soft nicker from the horse was the only sound in the silence as Rogue smiled. Giggling softly, she shook her head. She didn’t need anyone to tell her what to do or how to feel, her heart would lead her.
Determined to heed Logan’s advice she turned back to the gelding that had been grazing patiently, “Well, old man, let’s head back. I think I’m going to go shopping for something for Jubes and Hank. They’d love a reminder of what I’ve been doing here.”
*Would you mind some company?* Mr. M approached Rogue as she stood appraising several yards of brightly colored fabric blowing in the wind.
“Not at all,” Rogue replied glancing at him, “As long as you remember what I said the other night.”
*I’ll be a gentleman,* he promised with a soft smile, *and I wanted to apologize for being so presumptuous. It was totally inappropriate, and I do admit I’m quite ashamed.*
“I should say thank you as well,” Rogue sighed softly, sadly. “If I hadn’t acted so out of character, so desperate for affection I wouldn’t have come to the realizations that I did. It was unfair of me to accuse you of using me but I meant what I said. I will not be a holiday mistress, or a fill in for the real thing.”
Hiding a smile at her choice of words he shrugged, *Fair enough. So why are we looking at such bright yellow?*
“Friend of mine likes yellow,” Rogue explained. “By like I mean she’s in love with it – considers it the only color in the world.”
Laughing softly Mr. M nodded, *Well in that case, the bright sunny yellow would work well.*
Laughing softly Rogue nodded and paid the old woman selling the woven fabric for enough for Jubilee to make two or three blouses and a full summer dress. Following Mr. M along the walk way, she picked out several brightly colored statues, a slim choker for Storm, and a leather bound copy of a French book that she knew the Professor had commented on once.
*Would you consider dining with me this evening?* Mr. M asked, *No strings at all.*
Rogue sighed, before nodding slowly and giving him a ghost of a smile. “I’ll think about it.”
With a satisfied nod he turned back toward their cottages, Rogue falling into step with him. Walking in silence unbroken by her words or his gestures of communication, he left her at the door of her cabin with a smile and a promise to meet up later.
*********
Settled at the table that night, Rogue glanced up at her dinner companion who sat with a soft smile on his face. “Have you spoken to the young woman waiting for you back home?” Rogue asked softly, the flicker of the candles a bare hint of a distraction.
*A couple of times. She’s a bit uncertain about where our relationship is going,* he admitted slowly. *I don’t think she believes we can survive everything we’d have to get through.*
“Everyone has rough spots,” Rogue replied seriously, picking up her wine glass and taking a sip before setting it back down on the table. “But if you’re willing to work on it then you can survive anything. If your heart’s into it then you just have to listen to it.”
*Is that what you did?*
Rogue paused, her brow creasing slightly as she thought about it. “Yes, it is. My heart told me that I love him, good or bad, long or short, it’s always going to be him and fighting it only makes things more complicated. I think I took it for granted though,” she stated slowly, thoughtfully. “I assumed that there was nothing out there that could tempt me to betray that emotion until I came to face with the reality of life. Temptation is part of us, a part of our identity – I just let myself get swayed by that for a bit.”
*So you’re going to go back to him then?*
“Yes. I’ve always known that he and I were supposed to be. This experience has just reinforced that. Logan sees the girl I was, the woman I want to be, and he accepts them both. He also understands what it means to have so little in life that you’re willing to take crumbs to be happy. I suppose that sounds odd..”
*Not at all. How long are you willing to wait for him?*
Rogue smiled softly, lovingly, “I’ve always had him, and I just have to wait for him to realize that. Of course, that could take a long time… but he’s worth it!”
*Yes, I’m sure he is,* he smiled at her before reaching for his drink. Wishing it was something stronger, he resisted the urge to tap her glass with his own, he could be patient now. He could wait, because he knew in the end they were both going to win.
“So, how much longer are you going to be with us?” Rogue asked after a few moments of silence.
*Just until we get to Greece. About another week. We’ve got a couple of ports of call but no long stays. Once we get to Greece, I’ll be with you for the first day before I fly home.*
“You think she’ll be there when you get home?”
With a mysterious smile he shook his head, *She’s always been with me Rogue; I just wasn’t ready to be with her. We have a lot of work ahead of us, and for the first time in my life, I’m looking forward to it.*
“Shall we call it an evening?” Rogue asked rising along with him, “It isn’t like we’re going to solve our problems tonight.”
*No, but it’s been a start. I’ll walk you back to your cottage,* he offered his arm with a smile.
Leaving her at her door he turned and smirked into the darkness as he walked away, he had his answer now he just had to finalize the arrangements back in Rocky Mountain House – but at least he had some time to do it.
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