“What the fuck… Are you doing… To me…” She was straddling him, holding him down and draining him from his power like a leech. Slow, small jolts, enough to weaken him and bring pain, but not enough to strip him from his consciousness.
“I’m making sure that you don’t have to be afraid of loosing me… If I take enough, it may be permanent… Just like the force field in the Free Zone…”
“Oh… Shit…” He grit his teeth, new hope rising. Maybe she was right. Maybe it could work.
“Take what you need,” he growled, hooking his hands to the frame of the bed behind him.
“I’ll try to make it quick. But I need so much… Have to be careful. I don’t want to kill you…”
Every memory he had from the past, every single shred of that horrid time at the mercies of the breeding center flared back in to life behind his closed eyelids. His body responded to the pull in level that Mechanics had taught it to respond. Agonized whimper escaped from his lips.
“Open your eyes… That’s it… You’re with me. You’re with me…” It was Marie’s face instead of the greedy, impersonal machine above him when he opened his eyes.
“Stay with me…” Pull crept in his veins, making his heart falter and skip over beats. As soon as he thought it was going to stop she cut the connection for few seconds, just enough time for his heart to pick up the pace again.
“Enough?” He managed to rasp when she released him. He couldn’t even wait for her answer before he was crawling away from her, instincts telling him to flee.
“Was it fucking enough?” He asked with a harsher tone, backing against the wall, hands cradled protectively around his torso. She nodded and reached for him. He flinched away from her, away from her touch.
“Keep your fucking hands off from me…” He couldn’t stop it. The fear and hate that it provoked, to be completely at her mercy.
“Was it enough?” He asked again, forcing himself to grasp her hand and pulling it back to his exposed skin. He wasn’t sure if he could do it later anymore even if she hadn’t gotten what she needed.
“It was. I think. I’m… I’m pretty sure…” He released her hand and shoved her away from him.
“Good. Get the fuck away from me. Don’t touch me…” He could only hope she understood his need to be alone now.
She understood his behavior completely. She had him in her mind now. Screaming and spewing curses, and in the next moment apologizing before insulting her some more. It was like a rollercoaster, to swing along with mercurial shifts in his emotions. From complete darkness and utter fear and hate to love and caring within seconds. He hated her for having the upper hand and yet he was immensely proud of her strength.
It took him good part of the day to come out of the stupor. She was sitting at the front porch, drinking coffee and watching the sunset when he came out and sat on the porch.
“Are we okay?” She asked. He just sat there, gazing to the setting sun and breathing deeply.
“Yeah.” He finally answered.
“Good. I have been thinking… Would it be possible to move away from here now?” She asked. That made him look up to her and furrow his brows.
“Now that I got your senses, I can see why you said this place is unhealthy. I think I can’t stand a minute inside of that cabin. I nearly choked in the kitchen while I made this coffee.”
“Hmph… I’m in no condition to start moving. Maybe in the morning. We can sleep in the truck tonight if the smell bothers you.”
“Can I… Touch you?” Marie asked, sliding off the chair she sat, sitting next to him on the porch instead. Logan blinked nervously and swallowed.
“Okay…”
She approached him carefully, showing him her bare palm before cupping his cheek with it. He closed his eyes and she could feel him trembling.
“It’s over. It won’t hurt anymore. And I’m quite sure it worked. Apart from the power from the force field I have never kept powers or personalities in me this long.”
“Come here…” Logan gasped and pulled her to his embrace, burying his face to the crook of her neck.
“You’re like me now?” He asked hesitantly. She nodded.
“I get to keep you with me?”
“As long as you’ll have me. I’m not going anywhere,” she confirmed. Tension left his body along with a relieved sob, which he muffled against her skin.
“I was so fucking afraid of what would happen. What I would became after you were gone. I know I’m a selfish bastard, but all I thought about was that it wasn’t fair that I would loose you after everything…” He pulled his face from her throat and cupped her cheeks, placing a soft kiss to her lips.
“You’re not going to loose me. Not…” His lips drank the last words from her mouth; kiss no longer soft, but hungry.
He leaned against the railing.
“Your clothes. Get them off.” It was an order, barked with harsh voice. She quickly complied. His gaze never left her body when he stood up and undressed.
“Come here.” She walked to him, little hesitant and nervous. He had never acted this way with her before. One hand reached for her, grasping her buttocks and pulling her against him. Other snaked between them, parting her legs and finding her cleft, and small bundle of nerves. Few firm strokes over it made her squirm from pleasure and grab his shoulders to prevent her from collapsing. She could feel his cock, hard and throbbing, poking her upper thigh. It was hot as a poker, and leaving glistening trail of his seed on her skin. His fingers were teasing her, coaxing the moisture from her opening, preparing her. Flicking over her clit time after time, until she was nothing but a quivering mass of nerves, nearly sobbing from the force of her orgasm. That’s when she felt his hands on her hips, turning her around, pushing her to lean against the railing.
“Logan…”
“Shut up.” Low growl. Fast and powerful thrust, and he was filling her core, stretching her open and pounding in to her, teeth lodged to her shoulder and hands holding her in front of him, heavy weight of his body covering her back.
She screamed and bolted to her feet, throwing away the cup of coffee she had been nursing, scaring Logan who had been sitting at her feet, lost in his own thoughts. He stood up, scanning their surroundings.
“What is it?” He asked sharply, not finding anything unusual. Second time she had spilled coffee on him during this day.
He had come out from the cabin, fully intending to apologize his erratic behavior earlier, but she had been sleeping on a chair. Coffee in the cup had been cold already. He had seen no need to take it away. As soon as he had sat beside the chair, grazing her bare feet accidentally, arousal had tinged her scent and she had murmured something incoherent in her sleep. Next thing he realized she was screaming her lungs out, shivering in the furthest corner of the small porch, trying to crawl away from him.
“Marie?” He was crouching in front of her, mindful of leaving a small distance, some room for her. Much like he had asked her to do earlier.
“Don’t. I’m sorry. I won’t do it again. Please, don’t hurt me…” she was babbling.
“I’m not going to hurt you. You had a nightmare?” Logan asked with a gentle voice, easing backwards, offering her some more space.
“It was a dream? Oh, God… It was a dream…”
“Want to talk to me about it?” Logan asked sitting to the chair she had been sitting moment ago. It was still warm from her body heat. Marie walked to him slowly.
“Fuck with me.”
“Huh?”
“I asked you to fuck me,” Marie said, straddling him and grinding against his crotch. Logan took her hips and stilled her movement.
“Sorry. Doesn’t work that way. Ask nicely…”
“That’s not what you thought about when we touched,” she said.
“What I thought about you, us, when you were draining me, hardly matter. I wasn’t quite… Coherent. What ever shit you picked up, forget it.”
“But…”
“I would love to fuck you. Right now. Every possible way you let me. But only if it’s what you want, too. I’m not doing it if it’s some sort of test, or you feel the need to prove something.”
“Fine. I’m going to bed.” Marie stood up, stomped in to the cabin, but left the door open.
For some reason his reluctance, even when it came as a relief, hurt.
“You have to let it go. Now. You have had fucking twenty years to deal with that shit. Looks like you just pushed it away and hoped it would never come back.” His voice was calm in the darkness.
“Let it go? Logan…”
“Shut the fuck up, and listen. I’m going to do something I promised to myself I wouldn’t do anymore. Not ever. I’m going to force you to make a decision. Listen carefully.”
“Logan…”
“Hush. Now… Which is it going to be? Me, or them? Which one do you want in your life?”
“What do you mean?”
“Choose! Now!”
“Are you nuts? You! Of course you! It has always been you!” Marie screamed.
“Then start acting like it! I have had enough of this shit! I want to be close to you! Love you and hold you! Stop making it so fucking difficult!”
“I don’t know how…”
“It would be a good start if you stopped cringing every time I get closer than two meter radius from you. It’s making me sick. Like I was some sort of monster. Because I’m not. I’m not even trying to claim that I wasn’t there. I was there when it happened. But the part of me that did it to you, it’s gone. I don’t… I couldn’t do that to you. Not anymore. Not even if my life depended on it.”
“I’m trying. I really am…”
“Try harder. We’re going to end up killing each other if we continue like this.”
She knew he was right. She knew she had every right to be scared and suspicious, but it made healing and building the new life for them impossible. New life. She glanced around in the cabin, scent of mold and old memories stirring to surface. Sam. Love and momentarily fear and hatred towards the child. Unsurety of what would eventually happen. Constant struggle for making it past yet another day. Memories of the past, of the Breeding Center creeping in and making a nest. She could see it now. The deliberate way everything in the cabin was made and arranged. Every item easily reachable. Certain way some things were stacked up. Even the way she had placed the door and the windows, to allow fast packing and fleeing if the need came.
“Could we… I think it would be better… I would be better if we left,” she whispered. Logan just stared at her, waiting for her to continue.
“The whole time I spent in here with Sam, building this place and making sure everything went well… I thought I was making a home. This isn’t a home. This is a hideout. I don’t need to hide anymore.” Logan nodded.
“I’m glad you finally figured it out.”
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Ah. Finally. This has been nagging quite some time already. Found a way to bring this to an end. Old chapter with something new added to it.