Right Bub. Let me make this clear from the start. I don't need no fuckin' shrink pokin' around in my thoughts, ok? Good. Damn, this is a really comfy couch. You get many women in here? Never mind.
I don't want to talk about it. Not really. It aint none of your Goddamn business and... Can I smoke in here? God that's better. Don't s'pose you got a ...no? No beer? Too bad.
This is all Chuck's idea y'know. Thinks it'll do me some good or somethin'. Heh. For a guy with a brain the size of his, he don't know shit about... it's just the kid. She's really pissin' me off. Big time. Not just the standard I'm-gonna-growl-but-everything-will-be-ok pissin' me off. But the full-on 'BACK. THE FUCK. OFF' kind.
I mean, does she have a death wish? Some kinda sick penetration by adamantium fantasy?
Don't answer that. I don't wanna to know.
What kinda game is she playin' anyway? One moment she's all 'look at me, I'm miss sweet and innocent Marie' and batting her damn eyelids my way. The next she's draped all over Iceboy like...a...well a... Fuckit – I'm the Wolverine. I don't do metaphors. Similes. Whatever.
And it's just when I'm kicking back and enyoin' myself as well. Got myself a beer, a good game on TV, havin' myself a break from all those damn kids, who aint half as innocent as they seem. And that's another thing. Seriously. Who'd've ever had me down as a teacher? I mean, I'm
grateful Chuck gave me a chance an' all, but I reckon it should probably be him in here, not me. I'm mean shouldn't that worry people? 'Bout his mental health?
And with this whole discipline thing, y'know. I had to tell a few kids off the other day, alright, so maybe Scooter was right, shouldn't have used the claws, but now they're all so fuckin' terrified of me. All I can smell is their fear. Which is not what I want at all.
I'm not a bad guy. I can do nice. Well maybe not first thing in the mornin', but that's jus' 'cause I like my space. I'm a loaner, that's all. Or at least I was. Which brings me back to why I'm here.
Her.
She does it deliberately y'know. Yeah, yeah, I know you're lookin' like you don't believe me, but there is no fuckin' way her panties found their way into my laundry by accident. She was all 'Oh! I'm *so sorry* Logan. There must've been a mix up.'
Yeah. Right.
She knew I would be thinkin' bout those damn things all day. The little slinky lacy bits, the dark silk or whatever it was. Nearly drove me mad. Kept my wrist exercised for a fuckin' WEEK.
Hey. Don't think I don't know what you're scribblin' down there. I aint no pervert. Just a red-blooded male. And don't even get me started on the time she got herself 'locked out' her room. Naked.
Yeah, now you believe me dontcha. No one is *that* fuckin' stupid.
And I can't take it anymore. I'm either gonna have to jump her. Or kill her. And either way her prick of a boyfriend is gonna be pissed and will probably try'n freeze my nuts off. And then I'll have to kill him too. Which I'd rather not, because, y'know, there'd be paperwork, and deep down he's a good kid. Very deep down... very *very*... actually scratch that. He's a dick.
No I'm not just sayin' that 'cause I'm jealous. *No*, I don't have any issues with my childhood. Don't remember a second of it.
What I do remember is her. Constantly. Usually without clothes on. Then I have to do things to try and forget. I go out an' fight. Slug back the drinks till I can barely focus. But it's hard to pickle yer liver when the damn thing keeps up an' healin' on you. Fuck it. I really am gonna have to do somethin' about it aint I?
What d'ya suggest Doc?
Do I jump her? Before I try an' drown her in the lake next time she wants me to tie up her new bikini? Do I go an' show her my moves, next time she's doin that dry-humpin' excuse for a dance, before I'm tempted to slip somthin' in her drink? It's fuckin' torture. Every damn time, and she knows it. She fuckin' knows it! She stares at me with those brown eyes a'hers, and gives me this wicked smile. Ohhh yes. She knows exactly what she's doin'.
Which is why it's pissin' me off. I'm mean, for FUCKS sake. I'm tryin' to be responsible here. Do The Right Thing and leave well alone.
An' it's killin' me.
Thing is, she's kickass is my girl. She'll get me back anyways. She'd crawl outta the damn grave to stick me when I'm sleepin', for all the good it'd do. And she'd probably do it in that tight leather suit that is *so* fuckin' illegal that... No. I didn't jus' call her 'my girl' you imagined it. I *said* YOU. IMAGINED. IT. Don't make me come over there and...
Oh. Fuck. I didn't know you recorded these things on tape.
Fine. So she's my girl. You gotta problem with that Bub? Good. Wise answer.
So if I can't jump her, what then? I aint the candlelight and roses type. Although I could possibly rustle up a night out on the Harley. And some laxatives for the Icecream to keep him outta the damn way.
I could cope with that. Then we could go somewhere nice n'quiet. Away from the school. Get some nice takeout. Some beer. Yeah I wouldn't mind sharin' that with her.
Then we could get to the jumpin' part...
...Thanks Doc, you've been a real help. Appreciate it. See ya.
**********************************************
I Can't Decide – Scissor Sisters
It's not easy having yourself a good time
Greasing up those bets and betters
Watching out they don't four-letter
Fuck and kiss you both at the same time
Smells-like something I've forgotten
Curled up died and now it's rotten
I'm not a gangster tonight
Don't want to be a bad guy
I'm just a loner baby
And now you're gotten in my way
I can't decide
Whether you should live or die
Oh, you'll probably go to heaven
Please don't hang your head and cry
No wonder why
My heart feels dead inside
It's cold and hard and petrified
Lock the doors and close the blinds
We're going for a ride
It's a bitch convincing people to like you
If I stop now call me a quitter
If lies were cats you'd be a litter
Pleasing everyone isn't like you
Dancing jigs until I'm crippled
Slug ten drinks I won't get pickled
I've got to hand it to you
You've played by all the same rules
It takes the truth to fool me
And now you've made me angry
Oh I could throw you in the lake
Or feed you poisoned birthday cake
I wont deny I'm gonna miss you when you're gone
Oh I could bury you alive
But you might crawl out with a knife
And kill me when I'm sleeping
That's why
I can't decide
Whether you should live or die
Oh, you'll probably go to heaven
Please don't hang your head and cry
No wonder why
My heart feels dead inside
It's cold and hard and petrified
Lock the doors and close the blinds
We're going for a ride
The Wolverine & Rogue Fanfiction Archive
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Ok, so I was angsting myself out trying to edit Through Touch, I started listening to some music & this popped into my head. It was literally a 'listen-lightbulb-typefast-post' thing – took me about 20 mins. So 'scuse it if it's awful–LoL! I got the idea from Scissor Sisters 'I Can't Decide' – which if you don't know the song, and you just look at the lyrics at the bottom, then you'll probably wonder why the hell this is foof, not angst! – But it's upbeat, just that little bit country and so foof *Logan*. And well, every time I listened to it, I got this damn fic in my head. It's Logan's POV, kinda dialogue only...I guess – but with only Logan speaking.