Marie had found that during the time she had spent remembering the past, she had forgotten things. Small things. Like, the word fork or hand or door...she had forgotten how she liked her coffee or that she hated marmite, even what it felt like to be hungry. One morning she had asked kitty for a marmite sandwich after seeing a commercial for it on the television. Spat it right back out, and kitty had laughed her ass off, 'till she was in tears, “Don’t worry, just think of it as experimenting! We’ll find what you like...and don't like.” Then broke into another fit of laughter.
But none of that was significant, she was still trying to adjust to feeling the entire skeletal structure of the school. Focus and tune out the vibrations of the stampede of feet, doors slamming, even the toilets flushing!
Marie was so glad kitty was here, even if she didn’t voice it aloud, the girl had been a- surprisingly- amazing friend. Always patient, despite the dark emotions that dwelled deep in her insecure teenage conscience- whether Kitty realised it or not. Whenever Marie brushed against her accidentally, she'd pic up on the girl's thoughts...
Of Course, Kitty still had classes and Marie would spend that time in her room, afraid to step out of the safeguard the professor had created, or she’d be with Xavier himself, learning herself all over again. It was so frustrating! And Marie had not looked in the mirror. Not once. Afraid of the change she’d see...
Logan knew, he could smell her anxiety from across the hall, hear the mirror break, but would sneak in in the middle of the night when he knew she was awake, but both would pretend she wasn’t, and he’d replace it. Always.
Besides that, he spent his time denying his mistake and wallowing in self-pity for his loss, rage and desires...couldn’t let go of his love for jean...despite everything, but now couldn’t hold on to his neutral image of Marie. He was the one to awaken the Phoenix. Did he love her? He would have died for her. He still had a forgotten past, some real anger issues and was stuck in a “Love triangle”. How was he supposed to be her- the X-mens- salvation if he couldn’t get it together? And now he was itching to leave, take off on one-eye’s bike but...but...
Well, Marie bounced from the bed, boredom was settling, she had spent enough time in purgatory. Slipping her petite feet into a pair of ballet flats, she stepped out of the white room and walked down the hallway and stairs with soundless footsteps. After a couple of sessions with Xavier, they were happy to realise that her new found abilities were limited to direct skin contact, of course that gave her an even stronger compulsion to mummify herself in clothing than before, but, at least now her skin was no longer deadly without her control.
As the garden doors were pulled open, the breeze rushed to greet her and a smile spread across her face. Marie was no longer well know associated with death. She could not kill if she didn’t want to...and honestly, were the people that she had touched in the past truly dead? Sure they no longer had bodies, but their energy had gone to her. There she held it, their essence. For almost two years she had held the “victims” souls inside of her, thinking she had committed “sin”. She hadn’t killed them. Marie just didn’t know how to release them.
But now, as the thin straps of her dress almost slid off her shoulders and she felt the breeze caress every part of her body; her bare arms, chest, back and through the silk dress...Marie understood.
That’s when curiosity struck.
What would it feel like now...to touch nature? But before she could even entertain the idea, a stampede of children rushed from their classrooms and swarmed the hallways, rushing around. Marie tilted her head. She had forgotten what it was like to be a teenager, a child...she did once though, she knew that, the fleeting feeling that always evaded her. No more dreams about teenage crushes, or worry about fashion or trends, or even Logan's nightmares. No. These were all hers now. Her memories of that night. The night her father penetrated her. It wasn’t the first, he had done so the many nights before- and that was easy to forget at times. What she never could, or would forget was as his head was ripped off, right in front of her. She dreamed the sensation of warm flecks of blood splattering across her flesh.
A hand on her face and words spoken.
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Two Weeks.
It had taken two weeks for Magneto to hunt down the rats that had injected and camouflaged themselves into society. The ones that poisoned the minds of the human race. The day he had made the deal and Phoenix had released him from imprisonment, she had given him a list of all the 'bad' people in the world, and their locations. Before he had blindly killed civilians and anyone that merely got in his way. Both his and Charles ways for peace had failed, so now he would improve his method. Instead he would hit home and pluck the bad ones, leaving no collateral damage. And this time, he would do it himself.
It had taken two weeks to set the plan into motion, and prepare for the war he knew was coming. The only difference now, was that he was fighting for something different, no longer filled with rage and pain. No longer needed an army. When Phoenix had told him about purgatory, their world’s very own Pandora’s box, he had been shaken with curiosity for the unknown and anticipation for what was to come.
Most of all he felt regret. When he had taken that girl to power his machine those years ago he had no idea of what could have been lost, no idea of the gift she held. He'd ignored his gut instinct. Somehow, someway, from the moment he'd laid eyes on her he'd felt a connection, something unfamiliar to him...
Sweat rolled down the sides of Magnetos temple and dripped from his chin only to hit the ground. He grit his teeth to endure the strain on his arms as he held himself in a perfect handstand, performing push ups, upside down...repeatedly. Phoenix could sense every drop of sweat that hit the ground from the next room over. She found it amusing, yet surprising how much the- not so old man- worked out each day. He wasn’t lying when he said he worked to keep his body in tune with his mutation. This aspect of him kind of reminded her of wolverine...or maybe it was the Jean in her subconscious that brought forth that thought.
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Marie looked up at the sunny, blue sky and sighed, “I should probably tell them.”
“Tell what?” Storm walked up from the garden doors to where Marie stood under a massive oak tree, its greatness towering over them. Marie didn’t bother turn to the weather witch, just smiled up at the tree in answer. As soon as she had slipped of her flats, sensation had overloaded her. It wasn’t as scary as last time, and as she used what had been practiced, from across the acres of grass she had felt the pain of a living being. In the roots. The great oak tree’s branch was broken and hanging. Perhaps one of the many children were a little to rough. It was then she had answered in kind, and removed the battered extension, placing it in the sorrow. There no more pain.
Taking no heed of Marie’s bare state she bumped her own bare shoulder against Marie’s as greeting. Such a brief contact she barely felt the connection open to the girl standing beside her, merely a ripple in her energy, as Marie had tapped into it. The notion was small but significant in a way very few would be able to understand.
They stayed like that. Just staring at a tree in silence, until the hallways were once again empty and the children were in their next classes or off campus. Finally, she gestured Storm to follow her to Xavier's study. And Storm followed, knocking on the professor's door before entering, to find all of the adults of the X-team already assembled.
“I had a feeling you’d come to see me, something important?” Xavier welcomed her with a sincere smile, and everyone looked at her expectantly. All but Logan.
“It isn’t Phoenix you need to worry about.” Marie announced.
Everyone but Xavier turned to look at her eyes wide, “What do you mean?” Hank, or Beast (as everyone called him) was the one to speak first.
“She isn’t Jean.”
Storm turned to the Professor in distress, “That mean’s she really is dead. Professor-”
“She is still alive.” At this logan stood to attention as did everyone else. Hope fluttered at the idea that their good friend and former doctor was somehow not responsible for the chaos and destruction. Maybe the woman could be saved!
“But what of phoenix?”
“Phoenix was created by me.” An awkward silence filled the room.
“I don’t understand, the entity of the phoenix was created by you?” Beast asked.
“Or maybe I was created by Phoenix. When I was a child, my biological father repeatedly commit a crime. And my mother would let him. I understand why, she feared him. One night it activated my mutation, Phoenix was created, but in Jean’s body. I didn’t know who Jean was, I thought Phoenix was a person. She appeared and slaughtered my family at my beckon. She didn’t have a name, but she said she came from purgatory. She said she would love me and protect me. But for now, she would make us sleep and let me forget. That night I named her Phoenix.”
“Wait. I don’t understand. What is purgatory?” Beast asked again.
“I am. Purgatory is like...Pandora’s box except, I am both Pandora and the Box. Phoenix is a piece of what’s inside. Purgatory is the dead space between heaven and hell, the living and dead. When my father did what he did, he had awoken my mutation. Phoenix blocked it again, but when it awoke the second time, some of my memory was still blocked so I could only take energy. The cure undid everything. I can connect to everything and everyone. If I connect all at once the lines between the living and dead will blur…”
“There will be no definitive.” Xavier mumbled in realisation.
“Does Jean volunteering to be your guardian have anything to do with this?”
Marie nodded, avoiding eye contact with anyone in the room. She took a moment to think, if her theory was right, “At first she probably thought Logan would be able to protect me so she could play for a little, but after Alcatraz, she doesn’t desire to anymore…And even though I say this, it isn’t her soul purpose to save me, she is still her.
"In addition to this information, I also have something to say." Xavier interrupted. "The prison that has been keeping Magneto incarcerated was broken into two weeks ago and every guard and prisoner was killed. However, Magneto's body is nowhere to be found, I assume he's broken out." He raised his hand as Logan was bout to speak, "I'm only hearing about this now because they thought they had it under control, until they found the body of an anti-mutant politician with a heap of metal impaled into his body a few towns over."
Marie looked around, and attempted to crush the growing need to fidget; but it seemed now days whenever a room held her presence she was surrounded by silence and questioning eyes. Even when Marie had suffered from the condition of lethal skin did she not receive such a deafening reaction. How could silence be deafening?
In times of need Marie looked to her saviour and the item of her affections. She didn't even have to touch him to know what he was thinking, and it saddened her. With poison skin, a symbol of being the only thing on this earth that could possibly end him, she could not win him over. With growth of beauty, age and wisdom, to the point where some considered her similar to the weather goddess beside her in grace, she could not win him over. And now with the ability to practically touch without killing or causing agonising harm, guess what?
She. Could. Not. Win. Him.
Then so be it, if fate wished for them to remain apart and if he wished to follow his own. She would not stop him. How could she? Marie loved him.
Finally, she spoke, “Save Jean, but you cannot hurt Phoenix.” Marie’s tone deepened with silent threat.
“Hurt or kill?” Logan asked.
“Logan!” Storm scowled. Since when did they become killers? That had always been considered as a last resort.
All he could think right now was of Jean. God, Jean. Jean was alive!
Marie could tell by the look on Logan’s face what he was insinuating, “Phoenix is the only thing keeping her alive right now. Phoenix can’t die, but any long term damage to my phoenix and I won’t bring Jean back to you.”
This wasn't bitterness, nor revenge, she had accepted her position in Logan's life. It just meant she would not give anything back, only for herself.
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Chapter End Notes:
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