Marie curled into a ball on the store room floor, not caring about the cold seeping into her from the concrete floor despite the protection of her jeans and thin white sweater. It was what she deserved. The voice in her mind—Carol’s voice—screamed at her that she deserved no less than death for what she’d done even. Hands uselessly covering her ears, Marie was unable to block out either that internal voice or the sound of Amanda sobbing and begging her sister to wake up and talk to her from the next room.
Time had no meaning for her as she endured the mental and aural abuse. It distracted her so much that the feel of a large hand on her shoulder made her jump. She hadn’t noticed the arrival of the X-Men, but she knew whose worried hazel eyes she would see when she looked up.
“They said it was permanent!” she wailed, throwing herself at Logan and actually knocking him to the ground. To his credit he caught her, not once flinching away from her despite the renewed danger, and they landed in a heap on the floor.
“Marie…” Logan sighed, squeezing her in a comforting hug. “We’ll get you through this, okay?”
Marie shook her head with her face still buried in the soft leather of his uniform. “I can’t go back, Logan. I’ve got to figure this out by myself.”
His arms tightened painfully. “You don’t need to.”
She lifted her head, aching from her own crying and the screaming in her mind. “Yes, I do. I let the idea of the X-Men consume me once, as if that was my only salvation. When my mutation was gone and I could no longer be part of it, I was totally lost. I have to figure out how to live as a mutant on my own before I can even think of going back.”
“Do you think that’s the best idea, after…?” Logan apparently knew better than to put the previous hours into words.
“It’s the only thing I can do to keep my sanity and my dignity.” Marie knew that would be the best way to silence Logan, making him think that the idea was for her own good.
He snorted but let her get away with it, maybe because he detected the kernel of truth in her words. She was nowhere near ready to return to a place with so many memories, especially not after her “gift” returned in such a dramatic and painful way. Instead, he glanced around the small storage room and sighed.
“The others are loading Ms. Danvers and her sister in the Blackbird. We’re gonna take them back with us for a while, see if there’s anything we can do for her. Then we’ll bring her sister back when she’s ready. Do you—uh, would you like to say good-bye to them?”
Marie shook her head in short, jerky motions. “No. No way. Amanda hates me now, and I don’t blame her. I just—I don’t think I’m staying here, either. I still have plenty of money saved up. I think it’s time I headed north, now that I’m gonna need to layer up no matter what the season again.”
She stared down at her bare hand where it rested on his leather-clad chest. She was lost in thought for a few minutes, and he just held her. Finally she pulled back and away from him, although not without wrapping her arms around his waist again for a quick hug.
“Thank you. I guess you probably need to get going with the rest,” she muttered.
“Yeah. Just, you know, call me when you get wherever you decide to go. I want to know you’re okay.” He ran a hand through his hair, making it stand on end even more than usual.
Marie snorted. “Okay? I don’t think I will be for a long time, but I’ll call you when I get where I’m going.”
He shook his head and reached out as if he were going to tousle her hair, then thought better of it. Instead, he pushed a strand of hair behind her ear and sighed. “Bye, Marie,” he said quietly before slipping back out.
Marie waited until she heard the sound of the outer door closing behind him. She gathered up her purse once more and turned off the lights in the storage room and main room of the shop. She flipped the lock so that the door would secure behind her and then stepped out into the chilly air, resigned to having to start her life over once again.
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