Lunch was an awkward affair. Logan sat sandwiched between Jean and 'Ro, looking the epitome of rough manliness. That was until Rogue walked in and he blushed the colour of beetroot. Even Scott noticed.
Rogue, sporting matching coloured cheeks, looked the other way and went to sit with Jubilee and Kitty instead.
"What's up," Jubes asked, helping herself to more salad. "You look like you've dunked your face in a bucket of red paint."
"Remind me again why you are my friend?" Rogue said, between clenched teeth.
"Because I'm wonderful. Seriously chica. What's wrong?"
"You do look a little hassled," added Kitty.
"I'm not. I'm fine. I've just-" The sentence was doomed never to be finished. At that precise moment Scott chose to vent his dislike for his fiancés sudden interest in Logan.
Rogue watched in shock as the two squared up to each other, her eyes widening as Logan's snarled, "I aint interested in your girl," echoed across the canteen. Then the entire cafeteria watched as he glanced at Rogue before storming out.
Oh god.
All eyes turned to her. Someone dropped a fork and the clanging sound rang sharply out, but no one else moved. Goddamit! Did they have nothing better to do? Rogue swallowed and looked back down at her food, wishing that her mutation involved the ability to become invisible.
"Ahh," said Jubilee, eventually, as other people starting talking amongst themselves again. "I think I understand."
"Understand what?" Rogue was not sure she liked the way this conversation was going.
"You've got the hots for tall dark and feral." She gave a sly smile in Kitty's direction.
"I *what*?"
"It's obvious. You want a bit of Canis lupus."
"A bit of...? I do NOT!" lied Rogue.
"Uh-huh?"
"I don't! We're just friends."
"Yeah right. Girl, look at me." She templed her fingers into a triangle shape. "These are the pyramids," then mimed a rowing boat, "and this is you."
"Oh ha ha," snarked Rogue, snagging a forkful of food.
The afternoon didn't go much better either. Deciding to spend most of it hiding safely away, preparing for the evening's celebrations, Rogue got as far as stripping down to her bra and panties before the quiet sound of yelping from Jubilee's room disrupted her turmoil of thoughts.
She smiled to herself... to start with. It sounded like fate was giving Jubes her comeuppance for earlier. Suggesting that she and Logan were...well... it was ridiculous!
But five minutes passed and the yelps only got louder.
Rogue paused, mascara wand mid-way to her lashes. They were not happy yelps. And as far as she was aware, Jubes didn't have a man on the go. On the one hand there was no way she wanted a repeat of this morning's incident, even if it was with one of her closest friends. But on the other hand, Jubes sounded like she was really in trouble.
She sighed. Discarding the mascara until later, she took a peak out in the corridor, judging the distance to Jubilee's door. The hallway was empty, she could make it without anyone catching her in her underwear... if she was quick. Jubes was obviously having some sort of crisis.
Three deep breaths, and she ran, hammering on her friend's door with a squeal, before bursting in with an explosion of relief that she hadn't been caught.
Her relief was short lived. "Oh my god Jubilee, your dress is not supposed to do up like that."
"I KNOW," Jubilee yelled back, straps backwards, zip snagged to her bra, hair caught in-between, in what looked like a complex method of torture rather than a sensible way to get dressed. "It went wrong. Help me out of this would you?"
"Sure sugar." Rogue stepped over, fingers deftly working to undo the knots. But it was not enough.
"Ouch! Quit pulling!"
"I'm trying not to," she said between clenched teeth.
"Yeah but you - Ow!"
Rogue held up her hands and stepped back. "Look, this is obviously not working. We need to cut you out. You got any scissors?"
"Cut me out? I don't want-"
"You want me to pull some more, sugar?"
"We'll use scissors," said Jubilee, a little weakly. "But I don't have any, you'll have to borrow some."
Great. Rogue looked down at her lack of attire. Just what she needed. A naked scissor hunt. Deciding that the sensible course of action would be to first go back to her room and dig out her robe, she sighed to herself and peaked out into the corridor again. Only to come face to face with Scott.
Shit.
"Rogue." He noticed her state of undress and the frown above his glasses deepened. She could sense a lecture coming on. Now was the time to act quickly.
"We need your help Scott." Appeal to his over protective manly side, yeah that was a good idea. Boost his ego a little. "Jubilee's stuck in her dress. We need some scissors to cut her out. Will you help. Please?"
Ha! That killed the lecture.
Scott gave a glance to his watch. "I don't really have time."
Rogue decided to play her trump card. "That's ok, I can always ask Logan."
"You-" He huffed a sigh. "Ok. Stay there. I'll be right back."
'Be right back' actually took almost ten minutes, by which time Jubilee was almost crawling out of her own skin. By the time Scott returned triumphantly bearing cutting implements, she was scowling and cursing like a sailor.
"Stand still," hissed Scott.
"I AM standing still!"
"Sugar, we can't get you out of this if you keep sparking like that."
"I can't help it!" Jubilee said through gritted teeth.
"Would you just...DAMN IT!" cursed Scott, "Now I've gone and snagged my shirt with the scissor blades! He threw the scissors down angrily, before ripping off his shirt with a frustrated sigh to study the damage. "It was new as well," he mourned.
"I'll buy you another one," ground out Jubilee. "Just untangle my hair from this freaking torture suit."
"I would," he yelled back. "If you'd only just stand-"
It happened in slow motion. Jubilee's jostle knocked Scott off balance. He grasped at thin air for a moment, catching hold of Rogue's bra instead, which ripped in a horrific tear of fabric as Rogue, who struggled for footing, reached out for Jubilee. She failed, and they all toppled to the floor. Landing in a heap. With a loud thud.
For a moment, there was silence.
Then, "Scott," came Jubilee's weak voice. "I sincerely hope that's your visor."
"I-" But he trailed off as the door was swung open. They all looked up. Logan stood there.
Fuck.
He must have been attracted by the noise.
Rogue could do nothing but watch as his expression went through shock, disbelief, ran into horror, did a brief cameo in anger, then went full circle back to shock again.
She looked down at the tangle of limbs she was among. Was there any point in denying that it was not as it looked? Jubilee's dress was ripped, Scott's shirt was in a crumpled heap by the bed, her bra was in two pieces, Scott's arm being the only thing that covered her decency. The whole thing was a dodgy looking, threesome inspired, tangle of limbs.
Logan blanched, and for a moment he just stared. Then he stepped back out into the hallway and shut the door.
Two seconds later it opened again. He looked as if he was about to say something, opened his mouth, then changed his mind. Door closed.
Oh, this was gonna take some explaining.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Part four of the slapstick is up people. Thanks for all the fb so far *g*