Rogue,

HA.

We told you things couldn't stay great for you forever. Or apparently for five minutes.

THE COLD HARD TRUTH SOCIETY

P.S: Have fun with exams!

Keltie,

I want to give you a hug right now. I want everyone in a five mile vicinity to give you a hug right now, because you need one (or forty-seven). I cannot believe you waited so long to tell me this! And it's like, two weeks after New Years! How have you been managing since then? What is going on with you and Ben and Leah?

I'm studying for exams right now, but I can't concentrate because all I can think about is you and how horrible you must be feeling.

They should make movie out of your life. And Kate Beckinsale can play you, and "That guy from that show, the show you like so much, the old evil guy who kills people, come on Rogue, we watch it every week!" should play Ben, because he is the scum of the earth and you deserve so much better than him. (Sorry, I kind of told Jubilee and Kitty about your problem, and they furious for you). And "Mischa Barton" can play Leah (okay, that wasn't up to Jubilee's standards at all), because I'm sorry, but Leah totally should have known how you felt. Well, maybe that's unfair. But to break your tradition like that? Not cool. Oh, and we are going to get Brad Pitt to play Sean, and he is going to come over to your house and sweep you off your feet. Sound good?

Except I asked Sean if it was okay if Brad Pitt played him and he's still laughing. Oh wait, he just said that if you looked like Kate Beckinsale, he'd get plastic surgery to look like Brad Pitt, so that he could date you. But only if you didn't have the weird accent she had in Van Helsing.

I hope that made you feel better. If not, write back and tell me what will make you happy.

Okay?

-Rogue

Rogue,

That was a wonderfully thoughtful and insightful letter that you just wrote. You communicated yourself with clarity and poise, and you tried to make a friend feel better. We would like to offer you a provisional membership into our society.

Forever Yours,

The Society of Thoughtful and Insightful Correspondents

Rogue,

There ya go! Much more appropriate best friend behavior. You and Kitty are friends again, and you're helping another friend get over heartbreak.

As we say, there's nothing like complete and utter desolation to bring two friends closer together.

The Best Friends Club

Rogue,

Perhaps we weren't being clear enough. YOU ARE EIGHTEEN. For some reason, this fact continues to evade you, and we cannot find an explanation for it. Scratch that, we can find an explanation for it: You are completely devoid of any teenage-like brain cells. Gallivanting around with a man who could be three, four, forty-seven times your age? That's behavior for university, hon, which you would know if you turned off the Discovery Channel long enough to watch something a little more useful, like One Tree Hill, or even Gossip Girl!

And actually making up with one of your friends? You're supposed to be gossiping behind her back, spreading rumors, and doing other backstabbing things, not smiling at each other after a rendezvous with said 47 year old (or whatever).

Granted, your knowledge of celebrities does deserve some kind of recognition. But please Rogue, give us a break. Stop studying for exams and go do something that shows at least the tiniest sign that you are a teenager. Just a little one. Break some sort of law. Dye your hair pink. Use pen instead of pencil on your math homework.

Exasperatedly,

The Association of Teenagers

Rogue,

Um...just a question: You are going to start studying, right? Because you know, exams ARE only a week and a half away, and you haven't really...done anything. At all. Oh, well, you did draw up that schedule for yourself, outlining all of the times you were going to study before your first exam. It really was pretty, Rogue, don't get us wrong. And those flowers really gave it that extra je ne sais quoi.

And we're sure that your friends really appreciate those cookies you've been baking to help them de-stress. And the scented candles you put all around the room.

And yeah, we suppose watching Law and Order does help you review for Law and Government, although we're not quite sure how the Breakfast Club helps you in History. Even though it is pretty old.

But Rogue? You have to actually open a book for it to count as studying.

Help our nerves as well as your own, and study.

Cognitively,

Your Brain

Rogue,

You really are pathetic. Underneath your elaborate display of "studying", consoling heartbroken pen pals, and secret meetings with sworn protectors, we know what you're really doing. What you are really doing is avoiding going down to the medical center every week like you told the Professor you would.

Do you really think Hank can conduct experiments on someone who is not there? Do you think someone is just going to come up with a solution to stop you from sucking the life force out of every person you ever touch off the top of their heads?

No. YOU HAVE TO BE THERE, GENIUS.

You disgust us,

The Society Of High School Mutants Who Can't Control their Mutations But Could If They Just Tried

Rogue,

Thank you so much for your letter. It made me feel so much better, but really, I'm okay. It's way better that it happened like this. Now I can just get over Ben, and things will get back to normal...

Okay.

I'm so obviously not okay. I feel torn apart. One second I feel completely and utterly betrayed, and the next second incredibly stupid because it's not my place to feel betrayed. It's not like I ever told either of them how I felt...

Although, Leah should have known, right? She was my best friend, for goodness sake, how hard could it be to figure out...

But see, that's not fair of me either.

Then I feel really angry. It's like all of this hurt and betrayal and confusion and then thrown in is the fact that I have to go back to school and act as if everything is just great. It's enough to make me want to put a hole in my wall. (Actually, I did. Just a tiny one though. More of a dent really, right next to my bed where my dad will probably never see it). I know that all of this pent up anger isn't good for me. Especially since it's interrupting how I think and feel and function day-to-day. I hate it. But...

Right. This is totally pathetic, but remember that BIG AND EXITING NEWS I was talking about a couple of letters back?

I want to stick my head in the ground just thinking about it, but I'm just really sad more than anything else. What happened was, I was sitting with Jack in the auditorium during drama practice and Leah was mysteriously absent. I think she had the flu or something- it really doesn't matter. Anyway, the drama teacher, (who I absolutely hate) asked me to fill in for Leah for a couple of scenes, and I agreed, because really, what else could I do? I was sitting in the auditorium everyday under the flimsy excuse that I was a techie/understudy/genuinely interested in theater.

Can you see where this is going? I get up there, and my face turns bright red because I realized that of course, it is the kissing scene, and oh God I'm so mortified even just thinking about it, but Ben was really nice and he kissed me and it was so great...so horrible...so...

I have to keep on telling myself to take deep breaths, but this is so hard. I know it's not the end of the world and I know that this is not the worst thing that is ever going to happen to me, but dammit, I still feel like crap.

My dad wants to take Emma and I out to dinner now for Family Fun Time (I know, you don't have to say it), so I'll have to tell you about school later.

Hugs and strawberry smoothies

Keltie

Rogue! Look!

Kitty and I have decided to stage an intervention. You have been staying in our room far too much lately, and we for one (or two) are sick of it. Tonight, at exactly 12:21 am, you are meeting us in the garage where we will sneak out (okay, not exactly, Kitty checked with Scott first) and get some frozen yogurt at the dinner downtown.

You study too much, and Kitty and I are sick of you never complaining. Tonight, I demand that you bitch and moan about whatever it is that you are so depressed about. Cause I know otherwise all that pent up frustration is going to explode, and we'll probably all die.

Jubilee

Jubilee! This note! On your binder! That is a great picture of Ewan McGreggor!

Guys,

I know you think I need an intervention, but I don't. I'm really fine, I've just been a little stressed lately, with Logan back being worried about Keltie, exams, these letters from John, all this work everyone is piling up, plus Hank and the Professor are really hounding me about going to the MedLab, and Bobby is just being so damn...

Ok.

I'll see you guys there.

Rogue

Rogue!

What are you doing! You don't have time to be gallivanting around with your friends! There is no room in your schedule for giggling, girl talk, free time, frolicking, fun, amusement, recreating, pleasure...(don't even think about cavorting!) You have studying to do! Revising that needs to get done. And don't forget researching, memorizing, reviewing (and preparing) for exams (and by prepare we mean lie awake anxiously for hours while you think of the horrors to come).

Get cramming!

Nit-pickers of the World United

In association with:
Synonyms Synonymous Inc.

Rogue,

Your friends should be commended for their wonderful actions tonight. Taking you out for your favorite dessert (well, okay, your favorite low-fat dessert) right at the point when you think you are going to have a mental breakdown? And then walking back to the mansion (in the freezing cold we might add) with you instead of taking the bus, or getting Scott to pick you up, because they intuitively know that you want to avoid a certain boyfriend for as long as possible? That's friendship.

You should try it sometime, Rogue. Instead of ducking out of every event someone tries to plan for you.

The Best Friends Club

Keltie,

I can't believe how unfair life is. I can't believe you kissed Ben. I'm sorry for bringing it up, I know it is probably best for you to just forget everything, but really, life sucks. I'm so sorry you have to be going through this. You are handling everything so well though. I mean, if it was me, I'd probably have about 12 holes in my wall. And you would definitely be able to see them. I also probably wouldn't be going out for dinner, because my face would be all blotchy from crying all the time, and when my (hypothetical) father and (hypothetical) sister came to make me get out of bed to go, I'd probably say something along the lines of "I'm sorry, but I think that Complete and Utter Devastation means that moping around in my bedroom is more important than Family Fun Time."

Then again, I do hope that your dad and sister dragged you out of your room because it is very good to be getting out, not moping in your room.

SO. Here is what you are going to do. These are Rogue's Rules For Getting Over Complete and Utter Desolation: (As I have soooo much experience :D)

1) Walk out your door (you have to get out of your pajamas to do this)

2) Walk to the nearest supermarket

Buy the following things:

-Cereal, of your choice, preferably a very sugary and comforting kind like Honeycomb or Lucky Charms

-A 2 liter bottle of soda (I like diet Coke and Fresca, but it is Totally Up To You)

-Some sort of ice cream

-Something chocolate

-A huge bottle of water

-Some sort of fruit, berries are best

-A trashy magazine, either People, or Us (one or the other, you have to pick)

4) Go to the video store and get any movie that does not involve heartache, preferably ones with a lot of explosions or ass-kicking or with really awesome female leads. NO: Beaches, A Walk To Remember, Titanic, generally anything that lets you remember true love exists, okay? Good Choices: Legally Blonde, Terminator 2, Bend It Like Beckham, etc.

Some of these instructions might seem weird to you. For example, the water and berries. You are going to need those to take breaks between junk food binges. Trust me. And the cereal. Because you can shove mass quantities of it in your mouth and not really feel like you've eaten that much.

Oh, and 5) I suggest going with someone to the store, because it will be hard carrying everything back with you. I would prefer if you would go with that Jack guy, because he sounds cute, but anyone would be good.

Totally off the subject, but do you think it's normal to just forget to be sick? Because I think that's what happened to me. I've been sooo busy, and stressed out that inevitably, I got a cold. But then Logan came back, and all this other stuff happened, and I got even busier, and it just sort of slipped my mind until this morning, when I thought to myself how great it was that I wasn't sick anymore and hadn't even noticed.

And now, I'm stuffed up, sneezing, coughing, restless, lethargic, and feverish. I also happen to sound like an ad for Nyquil.

Feel better, and write back

Rogue.

P.S: Oh God, how are you getting through all this and exams? My first exam is tomorrow, any I'm freaking out, but I can't imagine how your...

Okay, I'll stop. I promise. Go. Rent movies!

ALL CORRESPONDENCE HAS BEEN CEASED AT THIS TIME TO ALLOW STUDENTS TO CONCENTRATE ON EXAMS.

Rogue,

WE'RE FREE! FREEEEEEEE! NO MORE EXAMS!

Party in the common room?

Jubilee

Rogue,

We need to talk. Can you meet me downstairs in the kitchen tonight?

Bobby

Bobby,

Sure. What's this all about?

Rogue

Rogue,

How perfect! A secret rendezvous with your boyfriend at midnight. Now is the perfect chance for you to make up for all that time you lost when you were too busy studying! Or hanging out with your friends. Or washing your hair.

The Young Romance Association

Hang on...just a minute here. Let us get our heads on straight. Is he...is he...BREAKING UP WITH YOU? He can't break up with you! You're in love! He supposed to be infatuated with you! Birds fly around his head, and little hearts fly around the little birdies' heads, whenever you walk into the room. He can't live without you! This can't be happening!

Confused,

The Young Romance Association

Rogue,

Don't Freak Out. Take deep, even breaths. Yes, it appears that Bobby is breaking up with you. And yes, it appears that there is a possibility that you will spend the rest of your life alone. But it is nothing to worry about! Think of how much time you will have for...for...free time! Er...you always wanted to take up knitting right? Like the celebrities?

Always a silver lining!

Take a Deep Breath and Calm Down Society

Rogue,

Hate to say it (but not really): We told you so. It is simply not acceptable for someone of Bobby's stature to be seen dating someone as...er, average as you. No offense.

Don't be surprised if you see Bobby strutting around the school tomorrow with a model (or three) hanging off his arm.

Kindest Regards, etc,

The Society of Beautiful People (SOB.P)

Rogue,

WE MOCK YOU

THE COLD HARD TRUTH ASSOCIATION

P.S. Buy a cat.

Rogue,

You have received letters from our affiliates, The Society of Beautiful People and the COLD HARD TRUTH ASSOCIATION? As per usual, we add our support.

But for future reference? A true teenager would not have handled this situation quite so calmly. A real teenager would have thrown that bottle of soda (the same soda that went up your nose, ever so gracefully, when Bobby first started talking) against the wall, screamed names at everyone they saw, and stomped up to their room and slammed the door, refusing to talk to their roommates.

A true teenager would not have calmly walked out of the kitchen, up the stairs, and into their room with no door slamming.

However, that last bit? The part where you told Kitty and Jubilee what happened, and then burst into tears?

That was a little bit impressive. You're at least making some progress in the Drama Queen category.

The Association of Teenagers

Dear Rogue,

Based on your previous song choices, we recommend:

"What Becomes of the Broken Hearted" by Jimmy Ruffin

We think you'll agree this song is a useful addition to your iTunes library.

Sincerely,

Apple iTunes Genius Suggestions,

In Association with

The Broken Hearts Club

Rogue,

I feel terrible. I'm going to stop talking about myself from now on because I am incredibly selfish. I can't believe that you go sick because of me. Or at least I can't believe you got sick because my problem made you stressed out.

Or, maybe I'm being incredibly pompous and you actually have other things to be stressed about besides me.

In any case, I'm sorry, and I want to make it up to you. I was thinking how great it would be if we could talk face to face, and I'd really like to meet you. How about we go for a coffee or something and you can tell me everything that's been going on with you, and I can tell you what's been happening with Ben and Leah? (Look! I can write their names now and not feel burning hatred! I'm improving!)

So what do you think? Coffee? Frozen Yogurt? Yoga Class (eww...) You set the date.

Keltie

Rogue! Look at this note! Sliding under the bathroom door!

Are you ok? We know it's important that you're alone, but...

Rogue, I gotta go! Bad!

Jubilee, go away! Just tell us you're okay, please? I mean, under the circumstances?

K & J

Rogue?

K&J

Okay, we're coming in

K&J