You're such a moron. Look at yourself. Your first time in Europe, and where's the first place you head? A cafe in Amsterdam? A discotheque in Paris? A pub in London?

Nope. A freaking research lab in the middle of nowhere, Scotland.

Even when you do something kind of cool, like saving the world, you do it in the lamest way possible.

Look at yourself. Your hair is slicked to your forehead. Your skin is clammy and blotchy. You look green and blue and purple and to be honest, more than a little creepy.

Do you have something against hairbrushes, Rogue? Against a little preparation before you sacrifice yourself for the sake of humanity? Your face is going to be plastered over the newspapers, hon. Would it have killed you to bring along some lipgloss?

It looks like that syringe might.

You really don't look so good.

The Association of Teenagers

Congratulations, Rogue. You managed to destroy the facility, destroy the other strain, neutralize Mystique and her cronies, and obtain the antidote. Now it's just the simple matter of watching your friend die in your arms.

Sadly,

The Best Friends Club

Don't do it Rogue.

We see you, crouched on that rocky cliff, hunching over those syringes like a kid in a candy shop. We know the sight too well. You think this will solve all your problems, don't you, Rogue? You think it will just take a second and everything will be better, right?

Wrong.

We're here to tell you that drugs are NEVER the answer.

We see that crazed look in your eyes. In John's eyes. We see how your hands are shaking as you tie that fabric around his arm. Both of you are just salivating at the idea of your next fix, but we beg you to look at other options! You have your whole future ahead of you!

Just say NO to drugs, Rogue.

Sincerely,

Clean Teens Club

Rogue,

There's a reason there is a vial with your name on it. Think. Think hard.

Why isn't there one with John's name on it? What's so special about you?

Why would Moira be interested in you in particular? Could it have something to do with your mutation?

Come on, Rogue. We can't be doing all the work here.

Sincerely,

The Amateur Detectives Club

Rogue,

Remember a couple of days ago, when Logan's mutation cured you of the Legacy Virus?

Remember one day ago, and that e-mail from Moira, where she told you that your mutation reacted to the healing gene differently than other mutants?

Remember half an hour ago, when you saw the vial with the true antidote, the vial with your name on it, and the vial with the faulty antidote all next to each other?

Think maybe these things have something in common?

The Memory Trigger Society

Rogue,

Pain. Pain like you've never felt it before. Pain coursing up and down your body, waging a war with your bloodstream, fighting a battle within your very cells.

Everything hurts so much, and you're screaming and crying and begging for it to be over. You're clutching the grass and you can't see straight. The only sense you're aware of is the one that allows you to feel this excruciating pain.

Maybe it's just too much. Maybe you just don't have the strength for this. You've put up a valiant fight, Rogue. We couldn't be prouder. You've come so far, and maybe this is the end of the road.

Death sounds like a pretty good option right now. Just give in to it. Just let go.

You can thank us later,

Sensible Suggestions at Your Service, Ltd.

To: Admin

From: ScottSummers

I found them. About a hundred meters from the lab is a cliff that overlooks the sea. The grass was high enough so that they couldn't be seen from the facility.

Both unconscious, but both alive.

Moira is tending to them now, even though I told her to go to the hospital with the rest of her staff. She brushed me off.

Mystique is in custody, and two researchers (presumably Brotherhood moles) are dead. We're interrogating everyone, trying to determine what exactly happened and how many other moles there were. So far we've found two others, masking as a janitor and an intern. Had the kids not been there, they probably would have disappeared without anyone noticing, and we might live in a very different world right now.

By now the virus should have been neutralized world-wide, but I guess we won't know for a couple of hours. As soon as the kids are stable enough to be moved, I'll arrange for a MedEvac to take them to Glasgow for a thorough observation.

I suspect Logan will be showing up here as soon as he's cleared for release, so I'm sending Ororo and Kurt home with the jet. I'll stay overnight with the kids and at that point I'll have time to write a full report.

I'll update you on their conditions throughout the night.

Scott

FOR ROGUE AND JOHN WHEN YOU WAKE UP! LOOK AT THIS LETTER! STUCK IN THIS VASE OF FLOWERS!

I've been sitting here for over an hour trying to decide what words I can use to express how angry I am at the two of you for the stunt you just pulled. I even asked the nurse for a thesaurus to try and find some stronger synonyms. (For the record: irate, livid, seething, and apoplectic all fit the bill)

But before I could finish, the phone rang. And the letters started flowing in. And the cards and the e-mails and the flowers. Then the President called (yes, that President, the President of the United States) called to congratulate you on your bravery. The British Prime Minister called to ask if there was anything he could do for you while you were in Scotland. Somewhere in the mess of plant life, stuffed animals and candy that is strewn all over this room is a card from Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt, wondering if you'd like a cameo in their next film.

It turns out that a quite few people have friends and family who were infected with the Legacy Virus. It turns out even more people have friends and family who are affected by HIV, or SARS, or other epidemics that don't yet have a known cure. People who understand what magnitude of disaster was prevented by what you two did, as stupid and reckless as it was.

And that's when I realized that I already had the words that described how I felt. The words I used when Ellen Degeneres called and asked how I was feeling.

Proud, I told her. And relieved.

I was the first generation of Xavier's students, but you're the first generation that I've ever taught. I figure...well, if I had even a tiny part to play in the people that you've turned into, then a few gray hairs and an early grave is worth it.

I'm prouder of both of you then I'll ever be able to express.

Scott

P.S. But if you ever pull something like this again, you'll be grounded for the rest of your lives.

ROGUE! LOOK AT THIS NOTE! BOUNCING OFF YOUR SKUNK STRIPED HEAD!

How are you feeling?

Like I've just been through a hundred danger room sessions. Why are we writing notes?

My throat is so raw, I can't speak. Can you?

Apparently not. Smoke inhalation?

Must be. How's the arm?

Oh my God. Is it broken?

I'm afraid it is.

How did that happen?

Well, after you tricked me...

I didn't trick you. I had a plan.

Did you ever think about letting me in on it?

Maybe "plan" is a bit too strong of a word…

Hey, John. I'm alive.

Yes, you are.

You're alive.

Yes I am.

We did it!

You did it. If it wasn't for you, I'd be six feet under right now.

I'm pretty awesome.

You're a goddamned superhero. How did you figure it out?

I don't know. It was like I was kneeling there, in the grass, watching you load that syringe, and I just had this feeling like I was missing something. And I thought back to the e-mail Moira sent us, about how my body processed Logan's healing power? And I thought that it probably wouldn't work unless it was absorbed the way I absorbed it, through skin to skin contact. I just hoped if I injected the antidote and you injected the healing genes, and then I touched you, the healing would prevent the antidote from killing me.

You're out of your mind crazy.

Yeah, well...

I think I hear Scott coming. Try to look meek and helpless, and maybe he won't yell at us again.

Dear Keltie,

Well, I'm back in the hospital again.

Have you ever been so tired you couldn't fall asleep? That's how I feel now. I'm tired right down to my very core. I can feel exhaustion rattling around in my bones like clanging old pipes, but I can't fall asleep. Part of the reason is that my arm is in a cast, and it's really hard to fall asleep when I can't sprawl all over the bed like I normally do.

I decided there was no point in tossing and turning and my time would be better spent writing a letter to you. Scott told me he could fax it first thing in the morning.

First of all, I need to say I'm sorry. I'm so sorry to have written that letter to you. I should have known it would just make you worry. I guess I was just sitting there on that plane, with nothing but nervous energy racing around my body, and writing to you always calms me down, so that's what I did. It probably wasn't necessary to send it, though I did think someone should know what we did and why we were doing it.

I totally understand why you called the Professor, and I'm glad you did. It may have saved my life.

I want to tell you everything, really, I do, but even though I trust you, I'm having a hard time convincing the several dozen INTERPOL, CIA, Mutant Affairs, Excalibur, WHO, UN and MI-6 agents that have descended on my hospital room since 3:00 this afternoon. Apparently they want you to have some kind of clearance? Whatever.

I mean, how ridiculous is that? That my life is subject to security clearance? This whole thing is so ridiculous, I don't even understand what everyone is so excited about.

So here are the things I can tell you:

1. I am alive

2. So is John

3. I have a broken arm

4. I can't really talk much

5. Which is actually good, because

6. I still haven't seen Logan

7. I feel more than a little bit ridiculous.

8. Mostly because now that the magnitude of everything has sunk in, I've realized how completely stupid my whole plan was.

I promise that as soon as I can tell you something, I am going to call you up and tell you everything.

I'm starting to get a little sleepy, but before I go, I want to tell you that I'm really glad you're my friend. I understand if after all this you want nothing to do with me, but it doesn't make it any less true. Your friendship (and your letters) have saved me over the last few months, and I don't know what I would have done without them. I hope when I get back home that we can have a more normal friendship, with movies and coffee and girl talk. Does that sound good to you?

Love and gardenias,

Rogue

TRANSCRIPT OF INTERVIEW WITH JOHN "PYRO" ALLARDYCE

Conducted by Scott Summers. Transcript typed by Thelma Thompson.

(The following interview is conducted in a medium sized conference room on the third floor of the hospital. There are leather chairs surrounding a blonde wood conference table. A television monitor stands at the end of the table, with several disks and files piled neatly on top of it. Two others-a man with dark hair and sunglasses (despite the weather, which, I can see out the large window that takes up the West side of the room, is currently grey with a high chance of snow) who is fiddling with a digital recording device, and a younger boy, about 19, sitting slouched in a chair-accompany me. The younger one is extremely irritating-he keeps flicking his lighter back and forth, open and closed. He's not igniting it, though I wonder how the older man can stand such blatant disrespect? If this boy were one of my wards, I-)

Scott: Is this thing on?

John: I think that green light indicates that it is.

Scott: Alright, uh, I'm Scott Summers and this is an interview conducted between myself and John Allardyce. I'm going to, uh, ask you questions about what happened, and you just answer them as honestly and, well, accurately as possible. Let me know if you need a break.

(John makes a pointy gun gesture, and clicks his tongue, as if to indicate: "You got it!")

Scott: Okay. After you guys snuck out of the hospital, what did you do? Uh, actually, before you answer that, why don't you tell me how you got out of the hospital in the first place?

John: Can I ask a question?

Scott: Uh, sure.

John: Who's she? (The interviewee points to yours truly)

Scott: That's Thelma. She's a nurse here. She's going to type up the transcript.

John: So what's up with the voice recorder?

Scott: It's for clarity.

John: How do you know she can be trusted?

Thelma (Me): Oh, I'm very discreet, I can assure you.

Scott: She's quite quick. Look at her go. (They watch me type in fascination for a moment, and I try not to blush too severely) Okay, back to the questions. So, how did you get out of the hospital?

John: It's a bit technical, really. We strapped ourselves into these fancy gadgets called shoes, and used those to walk out.

Scott: (rolling his eyes) Try to keep the sarcasm to a minimum, okay? There's only so much my nerves can take. Where did you go after you left the hospital?

John: McDonalds.

Scott: (rubbing his forehead) John...

John: I'm serious. After we left the hospital, we sat in a McDonald's and tried to figure out what to do next. We'd heard Ororo mention that the virus was probably created by the FOH, so we were going to head to their headquarters. We figured if anyone would have an antidote, they would.

Scott: Did you realize how dangerous any attempt to infiltrate their headquarters would be, and decide to head to Muir Island instead?

John: Uh, no.

Scott: Did you know that Excalibur was attempting to shut the FOH down, leaving the Muir Island facility more vulnerable and therefore easier to infiltrate?

John: No.

Scott: Did you know the Brotherhood had already infiltrated the Muir Island facility and created a strain that was lethal to humans, so you decided to it was your duty to destroy it?

John: No.

Scott: Then I give up. Why head to Muir Island instead of FOH headquarters?

John: We didn't know where it was.

Scott: (rubbing his temples as though he must have a very bad hangover. Which, considering the fact that he is wearing sunglasses, indoors, in the middle of February, is probably very likely). Go on

John: So, uh, we figured we'd try Muir Island, because we'd been e-mailing Moira and we knew she had a few things cooked up. We hoped that it wouldn't have to come down to one of us injecting the antidote and dying, but if it came down to it, I was going to do it.

Scott: (looking quite pale under his glasses) Why?

John: Why what?

Scott: Why would you be willing to sacrifice yourself? Why would you do something so reckless?

John: (as though he hadn't heard) Anyway, we decided to go to Scotland, but we didn't have any ID so I, uh…do I have immunity?

Scott: Immunity?

John: Well, what we didn't wasn't strictly speaking legal, so...I'd like immunity, please.

Scott: Let's just skip ahead…we can deal with the legal ramifications of your actions later. (Looking concerned, he jots something down on his pad of paper) You're in Scotland. How did you get into the facility?

John: We walked in. No one was at the security station.

Scott: No one?

John: Yeah, we thought it was weird, but now that you mention Excalibur being on a mission...

Scott: They were trying to take down the Friends of Humanity. I didn't realize the security would be so lax that you guys could just stroll right in though...Most likely it was a result of the Brotherhood infiltration...

John: (scratching his neck, avoiding everyone's eyes) Yeah...probably...

Scott: Do you think Mystique knew you were there at that point?

John: No. She seemed pretty surprised when we busted in on her in the lab.

Scott: So what happened after you walked into the facility?

John: Well, you saw the tapes, right? We got into the lab, found the antidote, gave Rogue a minute to freak our about there being a vial with her name on it, and tried to get the hell out of Dodge.

(We all look up as a big, frightfully attractive man walks into the conference room and takes a seat. He makes a gesture as if to say 'Don't mind me.' Again, I try not to blush as his hazel eyes land on me)

Scott: (Turning back to John) But you went back.

John: She made me. Once you called and we realized why the Brotherhood was there, she said we couldn't leave the virus to fall into wrong hands

Scott: And that's when you ran into Mystique

John: And a couple of her more nefarious buddies.

Scott: How did you get away?

John: While Rogue was showing off her hand to hand combat-nice training, by the way. She kicked ass.

Scott: (frowning) I don't think I can take credit for that. (He glances at the large man, who hasn't said a word)

John: So while she was taking them down, I pulled an oxygen line out of the wall. One flick of my lighter and the whole lab was done for.

Scott: And Rogue?

John: Poison skin comes in pretty handy sometimes. I grabbed her hand and we both just rode it out. After the lab was destroyed, we made a run for it. By then, the whole centre was being evacuated out the front, so we ran out the back. We ran down this cliff to a ledge that provided enough cover for the both of us. I filled up a syringe while Rogue was looking at the bottles.

Scott: And she realized what the other vials were?

John: She must have, but I didn't know it. She told me to wait, and I was getting pissed because I was already pretty fucking anxious, and she kept trying to procrastinate. I think she's in love with me.

Scott: (clearly trying to hide a smile) Why do you say that?

John: Because she threw herself at me?

(Both men jerk their heads up in surprise, but only the pointy-haired one looks murderous)

Scott: Why don't you stick to the facts, John?

John: Those are the facts! Okay, okay, calm down. She asked me to, uh, try the other antidote first, the one Moira said came from the healing powers of mutants like the Wolverine (He looks at the large man, who must be the Wolverine-what an unusual name! But then this whole group seems rather unusual.) I knew it wasn't going to work, but I don't know...I guess I was trying to buy time as well, so I humoured her.

As expected, it did nothing. Before I could make a snarky comment about it, Rogue grabbed the other syringe and jabbed it into her arm. THEN she threw herself at me.

Wolverine: She'd figured out that if she absorbed the healing power through you, after taking the antidote, she might survive.

John: If that helps you sleep at night. I think she just wanted to make out.

Scott: Okay, Logan, I think I can take it from here. Go take a walk.

(Wolverine/Logan makes a very rude gesture in Scott's direction, but leaves the room)

Scott: What then?

John: Well, obviously her skin was turned on, and she wasn't holding back. I'd felt it before, but it was nothing like this. It felt like my soul was being ripped out of me. I tried to pull away, but I couldn't. It was like...

Scott: Like what?

John: I dunno. It was almost like she'd taken the part of me that could control my body, and was using it against me. Like I was a puppet or something. It was-disturbing, to say the least.

I was shaking and sweating, and when she finally let go, I fell over and landed on her arm. She didn't even scream or anything-just passed out. But then her whole body started shaking, like, uh, like a seizure. It looked like she was being electrified, like something inside of her was trying to pummel its way out. These bubbles of blackness were creeping into my vision, and I just wanted to lie down and lose consciousness, but her whole body was thrashing about so I dragged myself over and tried to hold her head so she wouldn't cut it on the rocks. Like you taught us in that First Aid class?

Then, I dunno, I must have passed out too. The next thing I know, I'm in the hospital again and everything smelled like gardenias.

Scott: That's probably enough for now. Thank you John.

John: No problem.

TRANSCRIPT OF INTERVIEW WITH ROGUE D'ANCANTO

Conducted by Scott Summers. Transcript by Thelma Thompson.

(In the same conference room. The weather has, as predicted, turned to snow. In the conference room with me sits Scott (the man with the sunglasses), another imposing looking man (although this one is different than the Wolverine, and not nearly as fit) and a young girl with a rather unattractive hairstyle. The girl is watching the snow falling outside the window. I wonder how this could possibly be the girl that everyone is talking about? She looks barely out of high school, and certainly not feisty enough to be the one responsible for all this hoopla. But what do I know? I'm just a grandmother of three, although if anyone tells you that doesn't count as expertise, they haven't-)

Scott: Rogue, good to see you up and healthy.

Rogue: Thanks.

Scott: How's your voice?

Rogue: Still a little rough.

Scott: Okay, well there's, uh, water here, and if you need to take a break, just let me know.

Rogue: Alright.

Scott: I've already talked to John, but I need to get your side of the story. Do you want to tell me what happened after you two left the hospital?

Rogue: Do I have immunity?

Scott: Immunity? I think you two have seen too many Law & Order reruns. Let's just say you do.

Rogue: Do you have the authority to grant that?

Sullivan: I do. Just tell us what happened, honey.

Rogue: Who are you?

Scott: This is Officer Sullivan. He's our INTERPOL liaison. Just pretend he isn't here.

(a few minutes are spent having Sullivan write out an immunity agreement on a napkin. Mr. Summers and I sign it as witnesses)

Rogue: (looking suspiciously at Officer Sullivan, but continuing in a soft, southern accent) Alright. After we used our totally legitimate passports and entirely legally obtained tender to get to Scotland, we broke into the lab.

Scott: By broke into, you mean walked right in?

Rogue: Sure, if that helps you sleep at night. What did John tell you? After we "walked right in", we got to the lab, saw the vials, grabbed them and ran. John was going to inject the virus right there, but I had the foreskin-

Scott: Do you mean foresight?

Rogue: What did I say? I told him he was an idiot, 'cause he is, and that we had to go somewhere else. Then I realized that we couldn't just leave without destroyin' those samples-

Officer Sullivan: Even though destroying intellectual property constitutes an international felony punishable by life in prison?

Rogue: Um, have you ever met Erik Lensheerr? D'you even know what he could've done with those samples?

Sullivan: That's all well and good, honey, but it wasn't your decision to make.

Rogue: You're right. Good thing I have that immunity thing though, huh sugar?

Scott: John told us how you destroyed the lab.

Rogue: (Grinning, and I swear, it changes her whole face. Lass could probably sell pianos to elephants with that smile) Yeah, that was pretty awesome. (Glancing at Officer Sullivan, who has dropped his forehead rather loudly to the table) What?

Officer Sullivan: Just...continue.

Rogue: I got to deliver the most satisfyin' roundhouse kick to Mystique.

Scott: Logan's training, I presume

Rogue: (I can't be sure, but she seems to be blushing) Yeah.

Scott: He'll be proud.

Rogue: Is he-? Nmh, never mind. So anyway, we ran outside, to this beautiful cliff overlookin' the ocean. We could hear sirens and helicopters but we were pretty well concealed. John started fillin' up a syringe, and I ripped off a piece of my shirt to tie around his arm. Then I started lookin' more closely at the bottles, and the names of the antidotes. I realized that the vial with my name on it was exactly the same as the vial that John was gonna inject. It was the antidote that Moira said would neutralize the virus but kill whoever took it.

Scott: And I thought you never paid attention in Chemistry class.

Rogue: (smiling awkwardly) Yeah...Well, actually it was more a matter of just being able to read...

Scott: Oh.

Rogue: But yours a very good class, don't worry. I tell everyone how much I like it, all the time. Really, ask anyone.

Scott: Really?

Rogue: Sure. So...I dunno if I really even thought out the whole thing-I'd like to think I did, but lookin' back it's all kind of a blur. I guess I just figured that maybe if Logan's powers could heal me through absorption, the other healin' powers could too. I figured maybe Moira had thought the same thing, and that's why my name was on the vial?

Scott: You're right.

Rogue: And I also figured she never would have asked anyone to take that risk...

Scott: Not with a compound that wasn't FDA approved. Too many legal and ethical complications.

Rogue: Right, but with the time frame we were workin' with, I couldn't just wait and see.

Scott: (sighing) Do you have any idea how big of a risk that what?

Rogue: I've gotten a pretty good idea...

Scott: (Continuing as though he hadn't heard) You didn't know if the antidote would work in the same way the virus did. Or if the healing factor they used in the other antidote would work in the same way as Logan's...or if there would be any side affects...or if you'd be able to control your mutation enough not to kill John...

Rogue: Like I said, I didn't really think it through...

Scott: Which was pretty stupid.

Rogue: Yeah, but Scott, gimme a break. The whole thing was stupid. Everythin' that worked out was completely by chance. We could have just as easily decided to go find FOH instead, or Excalibur could have picked another day to leave the facility. If that had been the case, we would have been SOL, because there was no way we could have broken into the lab as easily as we did. And there's no way the Professor or Moira would have let me take that antidote, no matter how dire Logan's situation was. I still made the right decision, no matter how stupid my reasonin'.

(she looks as though she may cry)

Scott: (After a hesitation) You may have done a stupid thing, but I'm still proud of you. And it's not your reasoning I'm worried about-not many people could have been as quick thinking as you were. I just...it makes me want to be sick, thinking about what could have happened to the two of you.

Rogue: (sniffling) I know. I'm sorry I scared you.

Scott: Okay. (Turning to me) You don't need to include that part.

Thelma (me): Oh, no, this is great! Please continue.

Rogue: I asked John to try the other antidote first. He was pissed, I could tell, but he did it. I think he's in love with me.

Sullivan: Oh brother...

Rogue: I tied the piece of my shirt around his arm, but we had trouble findin' a vein at first. All of a sudden, I had this delirious moment where I saw the scene as it would look to an outsider-you know, two kids desperately tryin' to shoot up? I had an insane desire to start laughing. I caught John's eyes, and he had the same crazed look. We both lost it-fell over, clutchin' each other, gaspin' for breath, dyin' of laughter. It was ridiculous.

Then we calmed down enough to find the right vein. He took the syringe and jabbed it into his arm. He paused, shrugged, and said: "Here goes nothin'." He injected the full dose into his arm. Before he could stop me, I picked up the second syringe, his original. I didn't have time to find a vein, or to tie something around my arm. I had to hope that it didn't matter. His eyes widened and he freaked out when I jabbed it into my arm.

He screamed at me, asked me what the fuck-pardon my language-I was doing. He was furious, but mostly he was scared. I felt the pain almost immediately, and it took every ounce of willpower I had to stay conscious, to grab his shirt and pull him towards me. I turned my skin on full blast, and then...

Scott: You kissed him?

Rogue: (blushing fully now) Yeah. I mean, maybe it was kind of slutty, or overdramatic, I dunno. It wasn't, like, a...sexual...thing. I don't see him like that, not like with...uh, I just figured I might die. Why the hell not?

Scott: What did you see when you absorbed him?

Rogue: (pauses for a minute, smiles a bit) No offence, but I think that's between me an' John.

(Everyone in the room is silent)

Scott: Okay, I think that's all we need. Thank you, Rogue.

Rogue: Yeah, no problem. Oh, and about that movie with Brad Pitt...

Scott: We'll discuss it later.

How are you feeling? Scott said you lost your voice again after the interview.

Yeah, I did.

I just wanted to say thanks.

For what?

Well, for everything obviously. But mostly for what you said-or rather, what you didn't say. I just read your transcript.

Oh. Yeah, don't worry about it.

What did you see? When you absorbed me?

Do you really want to know, John? It's your head.

Yeah, I would. I'd like to know where we stand.

What do you mean?

I'd like to know what you saw.

It's all kind of a jumble.

Please, Rogue.

You didn't understand what I was doing. That was the first thing I felt, when the connection opened. You were furious at me, scared for me, and resentful that I was stealing your martyrdom. You were in pain, because I was taking too much, but I didn't have a choice.

I know that.

There's more. I saw the first time you and Bobby and I walked in the woods after midnight. The first time you and Bobby talked about your respective families. The first time you and Kitty kissed-I didn't know about that one.

Yeah.

The day you realized your parents weren't coming back for you. I'm so sorry. That must have sucked.

What else?

Images of the desert, of strange birds and landmarks I've never seen. A cave, red and dusty. A girl, blond, naked, her lips pressing against your chest. Magneto, dismissing you. The view from the helicopter as it lifted off from Alkali Lake. The knowledge that you'd left us to die.

That was it, wasn't it, John? Your impetus for sacrificing yourself? You wanted to atone for it?

Do you want me to stop?

No

And me. It was really weird watching these images of myself flow into my brain. I mean, I've seen myself through others eyes before-first Cody, then Logan, and later Bobby. It's a weird sensation, to see yourself as others see you. It's mostly feelings of fear and self-preservation-that overrides everything else.

(The only exception was with Logan on the statue. When I woke up from that, I saw myself mixed with images of another girl, one with red hair and old fashioned clothing. It took me days to even remember my name, to accept that I'd never worked in a mine or churned butter or been killed by the man I loved.)

Anyway, with you, it was the sheer amount of images that overwhelmed me. I saw myself as I'd looked my first day at the mansion, that first day of school as you and Bobby competed for my attention. I saw campfires on the grounds, movie nights with Kitty, and midnight snacks with Jubilee. I saw myself changing into my swimsuit early in the morning (pervert-how come I never saw you?). There was an intensity of emotion that surprised me. It wasn't romantic. It was vaguely erotic, although that probably had more to do with that fact that we were kissing. It was more like a strong feeling of attachment and loyalty, mixed in with its own fair share of resentment.

John?

John, I know its weird to think that all that's inside my brain, but I don't think any less of you. And I promise you, it will fade. Don't get all weird on me.

I'm not...okay, well, maybe I am a little. You really saw all that?

Yeah.

Don't get any ideas. I'm not like, in love with you or anything.

Ha ha, yeah, I know. But you do love me.

Whatever, Ro.D.

Yeah, I love you.

I love you too, D-Dawg.

Logan, however, is a different story. He is very much in love with you.

Oh, shut up.

You think I'm lying.

No.

You saw it inside his head, didn't you?

I'm not exactly sure what I saw.

Yes you are. It just scared you too much to think about.

Oh, what do you know?

I know that you've loved him since the first time you got a look into that twisted head of his. God, Rogue, if there's a chance he feels the same way, why don't you take it?

Because it doesn't matter how he feels. It never matters how Logan feels, it's what he thinks that always screws me over. He acts like he's this lone cowboy with no morals, but inside he's a compunctious mess. If he gave in to how he felt-if he even thinks about how he feels, it would violate whatever imaginary duty he has to protect me.

Maybe he just needs to know you can take care of yourself.

I just saved the friggen world, for goodness sake. If he doesn't know it by now, I don't think there's any hope.

You've thought about this a lot, huh?

Well, we've been in the hospital for months now.

Rogue, it's been a day and a half.

Whatever! I know he's here. I heard one of the nurses talking about how "fit" he was. Where the hell is he?

Maybe he's scared, too.

I'm not scared. I'm pissed off. And the worst thing is, I can't even tell him how pissed off I am because thanks to Scott and his questions, my vocal chords have gone AWOL again.

That's all you want to tell him? That you're pissed?

John, he already knows the rest.

Hey, Kid. John said you've lost your voice. He said you've been talking in notes like this?

Yeah. Where is he?

I think he's taking a walk with Scott. Do you want me to go get him?

No.

I'm glad you're okay, Logan.

I'm glad you're okay, too. I should have said that before.

You calmed down since the last time you were in here?

Yeah...look, I'm sorry about that.

Good.

I probably shouldn't have yelled.

No.

I probably shouldn't have punched the wall.

Probably not.

I definitely shouldn't have said you were a damned idiot with delusions of heroism.

Definitely not.

But if the shoe fits…

You can leave anytime you like.

Come on, kid.

No, you come on! You strut in here all high and mighty when I just saved your ass from dying. You would have done exactly the same thing in my shoes.

It's different.

HOW IS IT DIFFERENT?!

It just is. It's my job to protect you.

ITS NOT YOUR JOB! YOUR JOB IS TO BE MY FRIEND!

I'm sorry kid, I shouldn't be antagonizing you when you're sick.

Oh, Logan. I'm not a china doll. It's that kind of thing I was talking about…

You mean when you were screaming at me earlier?

Yeah.

It was kinda hard to tell.

Yeah, well. Smoke inhalation combined with a toxic bioweapon does not a healthy voice box make.

Explain what you meant, before.

You, walking on eggshells around me. Acting like I need someone to watch over me every second. Like I can't take care of myself. It drives me crazy!

Can you blame me? One second you're begging me to get you drunk, the next you're committing an international felony because of some harebrained idea that you're going to save the world. You could have been killed. You could gotten a lot of other people killed. What you did was stupid and reckless.

Yeah, and it was also the right thing to do. And it worked.

I thought I could kick your butt to make you stronger, but it's made you think you're invincible. I don't know how to help you when you're throwing yourself into harms way like that.

Well, I don't know how to be your friend when you're being a condescending asshole like that.

Excuse me?

You think I need you to tell me all this? You think I don't question myself every damned day, about every single thing I do? I have your voice in my head, Logan, and you're not shy about telling me exactly what you think.

But just because you're in my head doesn't mean you understand me, and it doesn't make us alike. I did what I thought I had to do. I've been doing what I thought I had to do for the last year, and if you ever stuck around long enough, you'd see that too. If you don't know what to make of it, well, then that's your own damned fault.

I told you I'd take care of you, and I've tried. You just keep making sure I have to try harder.

Is that what you think I'm doing?

You think I do this stuff so that you can keep proving you care about me?

I don't know.

No.

Good, because do you know how insulting that is? Dammit, I didn't ask for you to play sworn protector.

So what, you don't need me anymore?

I need you. But God, Logan, it's so much more than that.

I don't understand.

I don't know how to explain it to you.

Why did you do it?

Break into the lab?

All of it.

Because:

1. It was the right thing to do.

2. I wanted to be a superhero (so that part you're right about, sue me)

3. Illyanna Rasputin died, and more people were going to.

4. I wanted to save you like you saved me. (And I'm in love with you.)

5. To prove myself. (To you, to everyone, but mostly myself.)

6. It's what Jesus would have done. (And probably Superman, Spiderman, or Wonder Woman, too.)

7. It's what you would have done.

Honestly, it wasn't even a decision, Logan. The night on Liberty Island, when you saved my life, did you come up with a list of pro's and con's? Or did you just act?

I hesitated.

I'm sorry?

Before I touched you, I hesitated. I was scared. I'm not proud of it, but there it is.

Are you serious?

Yes.

I sure as hell hope you hesitated! Everyone would have thought you were some kind of pervert if you were running your hands all over me as soon as you got the chance.

Kid...

Logan, the list above is just what I'm thinking now. I'm not even sure what I was thinking when it was happening. Maybe I thought it was going to be like the movies, or something. Maybe I thought Brad Pitt would come knocking on my door after...I don't know. I could have had the stupidest reasons in the world, but does it matter?

You're the one who taught me that noble actions don't always need noble intent. Remember?

I remember.

I don't care if you hesitated.

About #4…

I can already tell by the look on your face that this conversation is not going to turn out in my favour.

You're so young, Rogue.

And you're so old.

The look on your face! Whatever, Logan. You know how I feel. But if you've made up your mind, I'm not going to try and convince you.

That's out of character.

I'm trying to grow.

I know you are, kid.

I should let you get some sleep.

Whatever, Logan.

Whatever, Rogue. I'll see you in the morning.

A/N: One more chapter! Thanks for sticking it out this long!