The moment I lost Marie is the moment I realized I loved her. After two years of being on the road, I came back with some answers and the need for a place to call home. But I forgot how quickly things change. Jean was pregnant and married, making any hopes for a little action nullified. There were more adults than before most of them having hit eighteen that previous year. There were new teachers, both blue and both spending a lot of time with Storm. The only thing that was the same was the kid’s face when she saw me. She smiled brightly at me and hugged me tightly. At that moment the only thing that worried me was how I was going to stop staring at all her curves and the boy that hovered near her. I growled in his direction and Marie introduced him as one of her friends. I saw him as a threat. The real threat was actually on Marie’s other side, hovering in the shadows.
Marie spent a lot of time with me. She told me about how she was learning to not let her powers affect her. She’d made friends and passed all her classes with A’s. All I noticed was the way her breasts strained against the material of her shirt and her ass swayed as she moved. It drove me insane. So I did what I do best. I went to a bar and found someone who could suppress the need. I should have noticed dark brown eyes watching me from the corner. The next day Marie wouldn’t talk to me. I waited that night, it was ritual to watch a movie while all the others were asleep. At one am, I went to my room, knowing for sure something was wrong.
The next day I knocked on what I thought was her room, only to be told by Jubilee that Rogue hadn’t been her roommate for over a year. There was this look on her face I didn’t like. I listened to the new directions and followed them. Her room was in the rooms upstairs, used for those who preferred to be isolated. I knocked on the door and waited. I heard shuffling and then the door opened hesitantly and I stared into dark, soulful brown eyes. She wore a sheer black tights, long sleeved shirt, and midnight blue gloves. Her brown hair was loose and wild, her brown skin flushed and her lips slightly swollen. My eyes darted behind her to the pale form lying face down in the bed, still asleep and blissfully unaware. I put the pieces together quite easily and turned away, walking back to my room.
I thought I should be worried about the boy that always followed Marie around. I should have paid closer attention to the girl who followed her everywhere. I was so wrong, Marie had changed. She had a lover, a girlfriend. I lost her, and realized I was in love with her.
Rogue-
I opened my eyes at the sound of the door closing. As I slowly sat up, stretching my limbs, I saw her leaning against the door, eyes closed. “Hey.” I called. A slow lazy smile spread her lips and she opened her eyes. She hardly ever spoke and was especially quiet in the morning. I stood up, sheet wrapped around my body, and walked into the bathroom. Closing the door behind me, I start the water and climb under, enjoying the hot spray. It was wrong what I did and sooner or later it was going to bite me in the ass.
Simona came to the mansion about three months after Logan left. John, Kitty and I had been hanging outside the bowling alley when we saw three men hitting something on the ground. As we neared we realized it was a girl. We used our powers and saved her. The professor was proud that we didn’t kill the men but a little disappointed we didn’t call for help. Simona remained in a coma for two weeks. I was there when she woke up. She just opened her eyes and looked around. She looked so scared so I held her hand and whispered that she’d be okay. The professor had to read her mind after two days of her not speaking. Her mother had moved her to America when she was seven and remarried. Her father had been dead since she was three. They lived above a dance studio where her mother taught classes. When her mutation had manifested, the neighbors set her house on fire. She survived but her mother didn’t. She was alone in this world. Luckily she was eighteen and there was no need to go through a lot of paper work. We all thought she couldn’t talk until I was sitting with her one night. She said my name, rolling her tongue on the ‘r’ and then giggled. Her power intrigued me, she had the ability of metamorphous and I loved watching her physical appearance change. But it took her a lot of concentration to do a full body transformation, she told me that when I asked why she didn’t just change her appearance all together.
The months after that were the same, I went through my routine and she followed dutifully behind. She did everything for me and asked nothing in return. When I cried for Logan at night, she would sneak into my bed and hold me. After a year we moved in together, with her dressed head to toe as she held me. I thought nothing of it for awhile. I don’t know whether it was because I had gone without human contact for so long or because I still had elements of the Wolverine in me, but when she laid a scarf over my mouth and kissed me, I didn’t stop her. It became a routine, every night she’d pleasure me until I was fully satisfied and asked for nothing in return. It was wrong because all I thought of was Logan.
Logan. I can’t believe he’s back. I was so happy… at least I thought I was. I can’t believe how quickly I flew back to him. Nights with Simona stopped, replaced by movie nights with Logan. I spent time in his shadow, forgetting I was neglecting my own. I would have never known about Logan and that random barfly had I not touched Simona when she refused to talk to me and seen what she had seen. She wanted to run but I pulled her back into my bed, whispering how she was my lover and it was her duty to stay with me.
A knock on the door alerts me to the fact that I can’t stay in here forever. Sighing, I turn the water off and wrap myself in a towel. I open the door and my clothes are already laid out on the bed. Long sleeved red shirt, dark jeans, boots, black gloves and a black scarf. Simona sits by the window wearing a black dress, black scarf and white elbow length gloves. I never asked her to cover up, she just did as soon as she learned my mutation. Once I’m dressed, she stands up and holds out her hand. I take it and we walk down to breakfast. There is a look of surprise in most of the faces that greet us, especially when Simona and I sit at a table alone instead me taking my usual seat next to Logan. Then I’m surprised when Logan stands up and leaves. I want to go after him but the memory of him whispering into that barflies ear makes me feel sick, so instead I just eat the salad Simona put in front of me.
Logan-
I couldn’t sleep that night. My nightmares of the lab changed to nightmares of Marie dying at Liberty Island. When I reached out to hold her, tanned brown arms snatched her away and she holds Marie, rocking her back and forth. It’s too late for me. Sighing, I head down to the kitchen, silently praying for some sort of alcohol. The light is on, and after a sniff I smell Drake. I contemplate going back to bed but after a defeated sigh, I stomp into the kitchen and straight to the fridge. No use pretending I like the kid. Too bad the fridge is empty and I really need something to drink. Turning slowly, I lean against the counter and stare the ice fairy down. The kid pretends to not notice me and is digging into his ice-cream.
“Doesn’t anybody sleep around here?” I ask.
“Apparently not.” Mumbles the kid.
We stare at each other before I sigh and sit. I have nothing better to do and I need some answers. Ice fairy will have to do as a source of information.
“Who’s the girl that always follows Rogue around?”
“You should ask Rogue.”
“I’m asking you.” I growl.
The kid frowns but then sighs, setting down the spoon of his ice-cream.
“Her name is Simona. “
“How’d she get here?”
“Rogue, Kitty and John found her. She was pretty beat up, went into a coma for a week or two and when she woke up she never said a word.”
“She could be a spy for Magneto.”
“The professor read her mind when Mr. Summers suggested that. “
“When did she and Rogue… you know?”
“No-one knows. One day someone just realized that they were more than friends. The Professor called Rogue into his office and the next day, everyone knew.”
“Why’d he call Rogue in his office?”
“Rogue wouldn’t tell me. All she would say is that the Professor expressed his concern due to Simona’s fragile nature.”
“I see.”
Bobby shrugged and stood up. I watched as he put his ice-cream away and waved goodnight as he walked out. I sat there thinking about what he said. She was a stray this girl, Rogue doing the good deed by taking her in. Maybe I was too late. God, I need a cigar.
Rogue-
I think I heard Logan pass by. I was sitting up on the bed while Simona showered when I heard heavy footfalls pass our room. He didn’t even pause as he walked by. I don’t know whether he cares, and I’d really love to know. I’ll see if he comes to the school dance tomorrow and check his reactions to the other women in the house. The door to the bathroom opens, and steams seeps into the room. Simona steps out dressed from head to toe. Silk tights, satin gloves that stop at her elbow, a long sleeved polo neck made from soft cotton and a scarf around her neck, another in her hand. A slow seductive smile creeps on her face as she moves forward. She moves onto the bed and pulls me into the right position. Then she sits between my now spread out legs and starts to unbutton my shirt.
I sit up to help her, I shrug my shirt and then my shorts off. I never wear underwear to bed, a trait I picked up from Logan. She places a scarf over my mouth and leans down to kiss me. It’s soft and gentle, it always is. Her hands roam my body slowly, one hand on my breast, the other stroking my thigh. I moan into her mouth, the scent of her cherry body wash filling my senses. A small whimper escapes my throat as she inserts a finger inside me. My hips buck as she pumps in and out, other hand moving the scarf to my breast where her mouth latches on.
“Oh God… harder…more…” I moan.
She adds another finger and pumps faster, her teeth nipping at my breasts, then her tongue soothing the skin. As her thumb starts to rub my clit in a frantic motion, the fire within me erupts and I cry out in pleasure. As I ride out the waves of my orgasm, she moves the scarf and her body lower down.
“GOD!” I cry, as her tongue plunges into my centre. Her hands snake up again to grab my breasts, kneading them hard as her tongue drives deep into my core. It takes everything in me not to clamp my legs around her face but there is too much skin there. And as her tongue does one final swipe down, I cry out and again a white stars dance before my eyes. She crawls up to me and wraps me in her arms, pulling the covers over us both. I’m shaking slightly, still a little high and she merely hums. I don’t recognize the song but it soothes me anyway.
“Mona?” I whisper.
“Mm?”
“Do you think… um… never mind.”
I want to ask her if Logan loves me. But that would be unfair. Especially now. But I wince when I feel her pull away and walk into the bathroom. She’s knows when I’m thinking of Logan. And she never sticks around during those moments.
Logan-
I can’t think what I did wrong. I should have done something the moment I came home. Given her another choice, fought for her. But then, if I had Marie, I wouldn’t want anything to take her away. Maybe this girl feels the same. I sigh and toss the cigar stub off the roof. It won’t catch fire since I never lit it. Just stared at it and thought of Marie. Suddenly, her scent wafted past my nose. Her scent mixed with spicy cherry. It became overwhelming when she sat next to me. I looked at her from the corner of my eye. She was wearing jeans and a red tank top. I had to admit, she was beautiful. She had that same quality ‘Ro had, an exotic and mysterious allure. The silence stretched between us for what seemed like ages, before I sighed and spoke.
“Does she talk about me?”
I didn’t hear a response so I turned to face her. She nods slowly, suddenly very interested in her finger nails. “Marie’s my best friend… so… um… don’t hurt her, okay?” I start to stand up but the sound of her voice shocks me.
“Logan?”
I sit back down and stare at her. Her voice is soft and smooth like honey, she has a slight accent but it’s hard to pinpoint where it’s from.
“Yeah?” I ask.
“She knows about the bar. About the girl.”
Shit, no wonder she’s pissed. I need explain or do I? We’re not in a relationship and she has a girlfriend. So why do I feel so guilty? I don’t understand. Simona stands and reaches into her pocket. She produces a scarf and tosses towards me. It smells like Marie, a slight hint of cherries but mostly Marie.
Rogue-
God I hate dresses, there’s always so much skin showing. Of course, one doesn’t just appear in jeans and a t-shirt to the schools dance. It’s always a grand affair, allowing the staff and older students to feel like royalty. It’s always an opportunity to invite possible sponsors for the school to show how great the school is. Of course everyone one looks great. Kitty in a pale pink knee length dress, Jubilee in a lemon floor length gown, Jean wearing a red dress that shows off her bump, Ororo wearing midnight blue taffeta halter neck evening dress and the men in tuxedo’s. I have a forest green fish tail design ball gown and Simona is wearing a black floor length, sleeveless gown with to slits on either side exposing her hips, her breasts practically spilling from it. We both have matching gloves to our dresses.
My feet are killing me from all the dancing I did. As soon as the music started, Simona grabbed me and whisked me to the dance floor. She always takes the lead and for once I follow her. She taught me everything she knew about dancing once she was well enough. I love the rumba and she makes sure the band plays songs that have the correct rhythm. I look up to where she’s still on the dance floor. She’s with Pete, dancing the tango. It’s her favorite dance but I’m really bad at it. When she started her dance classes, Pete was the only one who wanted to learn the tango. Everyone else requested the waltz claiming it’s all they needed in life.
Her eyes catch mine as she dances and for a moment there’s a look I can’t decipher, but then she turns back to Pete and her eyes have that usual smoky look that is solely hers. I look around the room and for a moment panic when I notice Logan coming closer to me. But then I take a deep breath and calm my heart as he takes the empty seat next to me.
“Hey Marie.”
“Hey Logan.”
“So… you never said you have a girlfriend?”
“You never asked.”
“I’m asking now.”
“Mona and I… it’s complicated. She was there when I needed her. She’s always there when I needed her.”
I winced internally at how accusing that sounded but it was the truth. I needed Logan for so long and he was somewhere searching for a past, forgetting that I was willing to give him a future.
“You were so young… still are-“
“Then aren’t you happy that I found someone more my age.”
“I don’t wanna fight darlin’, I’m just making sure we’re still friends. And I’m sorry if I did anything to upset you. It wasn’t intentional.”
He called me darling. He apologized for something he shouldn’t really apologizing for. He still wants to be friends. Yeah, that’s me. His best friend. His young untouchable friend. Logan wants skin to skin contact not scarves and body stockings. And yet he called me darling.
“We’re still friends.” I whisper.
That’s when he surprises me by kissing my head. We sit in silence and I watch Mona dance. Her eyes are on us once again and there is a mixture of sadness and violence in her eyes. What does she get from this relationship?
“Te Amo.”
My eyes snapped open and I frowned. Simona was sitting at the edge of the bed in still in her outfit from the dance. I took a deep breath, my body a little shaky from the four orgasms she had just given me, and slowly sat up. I crawled over to her and sat in front of her. She put her arm around my waist and let it linger there. Keeping her exposed hips away from my naked body.
“I don’t understand.” I whisper.
She looks away and I feel really confused. I ache to touch her so that I can understand but that would be wrong. Simona is multi-lingual and speaks about five languages. I’m the only who knows that. She sniffs and I’m shocked when a tear falls from her eye as she stands up and moves to the window. As she walks her appearance changes. She can’t control her power when she’s upset. Her hair color changes then it grows in length and shortens again. By the time she’s sitting by the window, her hair is blonde, her skin pale and her eyes deep green.
“I’ll never run away… I won’t leave like everyone else… Mona, please…” I beg.
She shakes her head and walks into the bathroom, leaving me confused.
I’m so preoccupied the whole day that I bumped into half the staff stumbled down the stairs and dropped three plates of food. Simona never left the room so people assumed we’d had a fight. In the end my frustration was too much and I went to the one person who could help. Storm. She taught a variety of languages and always went with the professor on his trips overseas to translate. I found her in the library, Kurt and Hank on either side of her. Their threesome was something that people watched with intrigue and interest. They look up as I enter and all smile warmly. Thankfully they don’t greet at the same time because that would just creep me out completely.
“Hey guys… um… Storm, can I speak to you?”
“Sure Rogue.”
She stands up and loops an arm in mine, dragging me to the shelves at the back where it’s quieter. She then turns to me and folds her arms.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing really-“
“Rogue, I’ve noticed that you seem… out of sorts today. Tell me.”
“What does ‘Te Amo’ mean?”
“’Te Amo’… it’s Spanish. It means I love you.”
“Oh…”
Not good, really not good. God what have I done?
After running out of the library, completely ignoring everyone in my path, I run all over the mansion before a voice in my head whispers, the lake. I head there straight away, my heart pounding so loudly I can’t hear anything else. Then I find her. She’s on her knees, crying. Her sobs are strangled and her hand clutches her chest, like she’s struggling to breath. I walk forward and crouch next to her. What can I do? I never meant for it to go this far. She was there while Logan wasn’t. And now… I stay away from those thoughts. I simply reach out and hold her hand. Her sobbing dies down and she stands up and pulls me up and into the water and wraps her arms around me. We dance for a while and I notice how for once, I’m comforting her. I sigh and pulled back.
“Don’t leave.” She whispers.
I shake my head and move away.
“Rogue, why… “
“It was never meant to go this far. We have to end it now.”
Tears start running down her cheeks and I turn and run away, but not before I hear her whisper; “Te Amo.”
Logan-
I hadn’t seen Marie all day. Though I heard rumors that she and Simona had a fight. I felt happy when I heard that. Then I felt guilty that I was happy Marie was in pain. Sighing, I sit up and pull my t-shirt over my head, leaving me in just my sweats. My door opens and closes and the faint smell of cherries reach my nose. But when I turn to face her, I gasp in surprise. Then I growl. She looks like Marie, from her pale creamy skin to her two toned hair. The only thing different is the scent, Marie smells of vanilla.
“What the hell is this?” I growl.
She moves forward, until she’s on my side of the bed and right in front of me. Her bare hand reaches out touches my chest and I can’t control the gasp that escapes at the softness of her skin. Not Marie, not Marie…
“Logan.”
Oh god, she even altered her voice to sound exactly like Marie. I feel myself getting hard and curl my hands into fists. Not Marie, not Marie, NOT MARIE…
“If you could have one night of skin to skin contact… would you take it?” she asks.
She pulls at the robe she’s wearing and it falls to the ground, leaving her naked. I close my eyes but it’s too late. The naked image of Marie is in my head and her hand is stroking my chest.
“Would you?” she whispers.
There is a part of me that wants to. Part of me is screaming that it looks and sounds like Marie. That for once I can touch that skin without dying. And what’s wrong if it’s just once. The other part of me is still screaming : NOT MARIE! Then her lips are on mine and for a moment I lose the sane part of my brain. Oh god I can taste Marie in her mouth. I know the taste from the scarf she gave me. I start to wonder if her mutation can also change the inside tissue of her mouth. That’s when it hits me again. NOT MARIE!
“Wait…”
I open my eyes and pull back. Yet as I look down at her body, I see my one hand on her breast the other on her hip. I look up and groan. Her eyes are closed and there’s a smile that’s purely Marie on her face, her lips red and swollen from my kiss. I pull her onto my lap as I sit down and moan as she begins to grind on my erection. I lower my head and take her breast in my mouth as my other hands moves towards her inner thigh.
NOT MARIE!
“No!”
I shove her back and she falls down, her back hitting the floor. I take a few moments to catch my breath before whispering; “It’s the real Marie or nothing. I can’t do this… please go.”
“Right answer.” She whispered in her own voice. Her hair changed back to brown, her eyes became their usual smoky brown and her skin a deep olive. She stands up and puts the robe back on before walking out the room.
Rogue-
I woke up when I heard a thump of something dropping. Blinking in the light, my eyes widened as I found Simona packing all my things into various bags.
“Mona?”
“He loves you.”
I frown and climb out of bed, dressed for once since we shared this room. She zips up my last bag and chucks it with the others.
“Logan loves you.” She clarifies.
“How can you be so sure?”
“Go ask him yourself.”
For a moment I stand and stare at her. Then I nod slowly and rushed out. I follow the familiar path that I know so well. I open his door and burst into the room. Looking around, I see him sitting by the window. I close the door and walk up to him slowly.
“Logan?” I whisper.
I watch his nostrils twitch and he smiles, holding out his hand. I look at my bare hands and show them to him. He still smiles and moves to his desk. I watch as he pulls his riding gloves on and reaches for me.
“Marie.” He breathes.
I take his hand but refuse to let him pull me into his arms. There’s too much skin.
“Logan… do you love me?”
He stares at me for awhile before smiling.
“More than anything darlin’.”
“I love you too.”
He then moves to his cupboard and pulls on a long sleeved sweater and a scarf.
“Let me show you how much.” He whispers huskily.
A shiver of anticipation runs through me as he lays me on his bed. He places the scarf on my face and kisses me. It tastes of cherry. I try to stop Logan but as he slits my shorts by the crotch, pulls down his sweats, rolls on a condom and enters me with one swift thrust, I’m lost in sensation. It hurst for a while but his lips are still on mine and his gloved hands are roaming my body.
“God Logan… Faster… Harder!” I mumble. He grunts and thrusts deeper. His gloved hand snakes under my top and he kneads my breasts, alternating so that neither feels left out. His tongue explores the inside of my mouth and I moan in pleasure. I don’t last long and he muffles my scream by kissing me fiercely. After a few more thrusts he releases my mouth and comes with a powerful roar. It’s everything I wanted and yet a part of me is crying.
The next day, Simona was nowhere to be found. And the day after that, and the after that. There was no clue to where she was. When I entered my room the next day my things were still neatly packed in the corner. Everything else was torn to shreds. I never knew she was this violent, I never knew she hurt this much. After six days and still no sign of her, I realize one person remains quiet. I enter the professor’s office and find him sitting behind his desk calmly, as if he’s expecting me. He probably is.
“Hello Rogue.”
“Where is she?”
“How are things between you and Logan?”
“Fine. Where is she?”
“She needs time to… adjust.”
“Professor, you the only one that knows what going through her head. Help me understand.”
“Simona saw that you needed a friend… someone to touch you. So she became that person. I told you this when you asked me about when she kissed you.”
“I should have listened to you back then. But I liked the fact that someone cared so much about me.”
The Professor had warned me. He told me how Simona saw the pain in my eyes and took it away. But he also warned me that she was a person who had been hurt many times and I couldn’t just throw away when Logan came back. I thought that I would never be that person but it’s seems my love for Logan and need for touch blinded me.
“I never asked her what she wanted, and now the one thing she wants I can’t give her.”
The Professor merely nodded in agreement.
“She fell in love with you.”
“But she’ll get over me. She has too.”
“Rogue, you of all people knows how strong a first love is.”
“I care about her.”
“Maybe you should try talking to her.”
“I know everything about her.”
“You know what you absorbed, what you learned and how good she makes you feel. Whenever she spoke to you it was too reassure you. Did you know that she was the one that made Logan realize he loved you? That she tested him to see if he cared about your skin?”
“Logan told me. He said he proved that he doesn’t need skin to skin contact.”
I sighed and looked out at the gardens. Music drifted from the rec room down the hall and I smiled.
“Professor, where’s Piotr?”
“In the gym.”
I smiled and ran out. I stopped at the elevator and walked in, hitting the button for down. As the doors re-opened I skipped out towards the gym. The soft sounds of the tango could be heard. As I opened the door and stepped in, I smiled at Pete and the girl in his arms. She’d changed her hair to blonde and her skin was pale. Her eyes were closed as she danced, her blue dress swaying sexily. Pete noticed my presence and stopped dancing. Simona slowly opened her eyes and her smile dropped. Pete walked to the stereo and turned off the music. He walked over to her and kissed the top of her head, before walking out. And I realized what I had done. I kept her to myself, and she fell in love with me. Had I kept her as my friend and only my friend, she would have been with Pete. Looking at her heartbroken eyes I wonder if I ever looked at Logan like that. I didn’t understand why she loved me. I never gave her anything back. She followed me, she held me, she pleasured me, she took care of me and still managed to keep herself from going insane.
“I want us to be friends.” I whisper.
She nods but doesn’t move. I reach out and step forward so I can take her hands. She changes her appearance to normal and I pull the gloves off her hands. She doesn’t have to bear the burden of my mutation.
“My name is Marie D’Ancanto.”
“Simona Rose Alexandra.”
I nodded and traced the scar on her arm. It was the one thing her power usual always covered up.
“Thank you… for everything.”
“It’s okay.” She whispers.
“You deserve to be happy… with someone who takes care of what you need and not just you taking care of them.”
She nods and I carefully trace her lips before turning and walking away.
“Rogue?”
I stop and wait for her to continue.
“Te Amo.”
I smile and walk out. It’s her way of expressing everything she can’t. How heartbreakingly sad it is too lose me, how she will always think of our nights together, how angry she is at what has happened, how she’ll never mention it again now that we’re just friends. But mostly I think it means I love you.