The sound of heavy panting and a faint buzzing whir was clear to Logan long before he reached the metal doors that opened into the gym used by the X-Men when all they wanted was exercise, not combat training. Located in the sub-levels of Professor Xavier's compound, it was usually empty, especially at Logan's preferred time of ass-crack-of-dawn. Unfortunately he had been asked to fix the garbage disposal just as he was about to get into the elevator to go down and work out. Since it is Not Good for the disposal to be broken in a house—or mansion—containing more than fifty people, Logan had accepted the inevitable. Thus he was two hours late for his workout, which apparently meant he was going to have to share. He just hoped it wasn't someone really annoying in there, like Scott or Remy, especially when his mood couldn't possibly be considered “good” at that point.
“Arrrgh...God, Jubes!” That voice, all honeyed southern drawl, stopped Logan in his tracks. He stared incredulously at the door to the gym.
“C'mon, Rogue! You're almost...uh...there!” The other voice, usually far too fast and high for his preferences, was lower and breathy. Logan inched forward and then stopped as Marie's voice reached his sensitive ears once more.
“Uh...uh...Jubes, honey...it's just too much!” Logan's eyes widened further. Just then he felt a presence beside him. He reached out and caught the Cajun's arm before he could open the gym door and interrupt...whatever was going on. He slapped his free hand over Remy's mouth to muffle the other man's yelp. Remy struggled, but only until the voices, now easily heard through the door, started up again.
“Uh...uh...aaaarrrrghh! God, Jubes, I'm not finishing this without you! You're almost there, babe, almost there!” that husky voice shouted.
Logan felt like his jeans shrank instantly at that point, they were so tight in the crotch. The strange mechanical buzzing sound definitely didn't help.
“Roguey! I...uuuhhh...can't! Please, I...uuhh...can't!”
“You're...uuuhhh...there, babe! Just...a...little...uuuhhh...mooooooore!”
“ARRRRRGGGGHHHH!” Jubilee yelled. Marie echoed her.
All was quiet except for that damn buzz, which slowed and then abruptly stopped. Logan held his breath. Remy's eyes were wide as well, and Logan could smell the arousal starting to emanate from him. Then Logan heard a thud.
“My God, Jubes, why are we doing this?”
“Fine asses, chica, fine asses. Ours...” Yeah, that sounded about right. “...and theirs.”
Huh? Now Logan was confused, and he could tell that Remy was, too. Maybe...?
“I swear, Jubes, I wonder if it's even worth it sometimes. Yeah, we look shit hot in all that skin-tight black leather, but what's the point? It's not like some hard-headed idiots ever get it, you know? I can shake my ass in leather all day long, right in front of his face, and he never even tries to cop a feel!”
Now Logan's brain was starting to clear from the strange haze of desire, and he felt a little awkward. Did they always do this girl talk shit after...? And what was with Marie saying she'd been shaking her ass in some guy's face? Logan shot a glare at Remy who, as one of the single guys in the mansion, was a reasonable candidate for said ass-shaking.
“It's not so bad, Roguey, really. I've seen the way his eyes glaze over after you do that, even if he won't admit it because he's too damn stubborn. Trust me, he notices. C'mon, it's abs time. Gotta keep these sexy stomachs flat somehow, right?”
Logan heard Marie growl, kind of like he did whenever he was truly annoyed. He heard the sound of bodies slapping onto plastic-coated canvas—the mats.
“What the hell is the point of perfect abs, Jubes? Look at mine! All sculpted muscles and smooth, newly-touchable skin—here, feel.”
“Beautiful, Rogue. Your abs are so hot.”
“Yeah, yours are gorgeous, too. So why is it that the two of us, pretty much sex goddesses, can't get two stupid, idiotic mother fuckers to stand up and take notice?” Oh, the frustration in her voice!
Logan wondered if the man she was talking about was really that blind. He was certainly up and noticing at that point, the young women's words reminding him of the many incredibly sexy attributes he'd been noticing on Marie of late. He also noticed that Remy's attention was still completely fixed on the conversation. Logan glared, silently promising to gut the Cajun if he was Marie's “idiot.”
Jubilee laughed. She still sounded winded. “You know, chica, maybe we're wrong about the leather.” Her tone had turned thoughtful. Logan wanted to shake his head like Remy was, but he manfully restrained—just.
“Hmmm...it's a point, babe. So what do you think we should do?”
God. Women actually discussed these things. They planned. He now had proof! And a witness! Too bad he couldn't record this, just for posterity's sake, of course.
“I'm thinking exact opposite of skin-tight leather, Roguey.” Logan could almost see the evil sparkle in her eyes, the one that always made him a little scared.
“You mean parade bare assed in front of them and hope they finally get the hint when hit with the Hint Sledgehammer?” Marie's voice held none of the shock he would have imagined her feeling at the idea of parading in front of anyone nude. She was all angry sarcasm.
Jubilee's shout of laughter was more energetic this time. “Not quite, chica. I'm thinking string bikinis for the pool today. You know, the ones we bought last week. I know we'll look damn fine in those little black scraps, and if they don't notice us at that point...I will give us both permission to never look at those damned ellipticals or these stupid weights and mats again because it really would be totally useless at that point.”
Damn. Ellipticals explained the odd sounds and how out of breath they were. It also would explain most of their comments, he supposed, although he wanted to pout because he had liked his original theory in way too many ways he shouldn't have.
“We could get fat!” Marie's voice held an alarming amount of relish at that concept, and it distracted Logan from his disappointment in learning about the ellipticals. Almost.
“Nah, not so fast! We have more dignity than that, right? If they don't succumb to the string bikinis, we just find two amazingly hot guys—not from here, mind you, because we wouldn't want to bring in that kind of attention, but I know a place—anyway, two mind-fuckingly hot guys, and we proceed to hang all over them and forget our sorrows in their sweat-slicked, rippling muscles and stamina that could last for hours...hmmm...”
“Jubes, quit drooling on the mat. Although that does sound like a good back-up plan. I admit that I'm so sexually frustrated that Mr. Happy is in no way doing it for me in anymore. It really sucks when not even a world-class expensive-as-all-hell dildo can't get you off, you know?”
“Yeah, I know, chica. I know.”
Alright, in Logan's head he knew that Marie was twenty-one and could have as many sex toys as she damned well pleased, but he never thought he would hear about them. And he definitely didn't like that Remy was hearing about them, either. His glare at the Cajun got a whole new level of darker.
“I swear, though, that I'm pretty close to the breaking point on this one, babe. If he doesn't get his hairy ass in gear soon, I just might have to take drastic measures, mostly involving the hand-cuffs and cat o'nine tails I bought during that last shopping trip. Did I mention that I am horny?”
Wait—hairy? HANK?! And hand-cuffs and...Logan barely suppressed his growl of rage at this one by imagining what Marie would look like if he used said-handcuffs to chain her to her bed...naked...hmm...
“Preaching to the choir, Rogue. Although, you know, I'd pay good money to see that, chica, especially if you let me take a picture of Logan's face if it got that far!”
At that point Logan's jaw dropped. He knew it, and knew that Remy was staring at him now with a mixture of disappointment and totally disproportionate amusement. He was pretty sure his brain was both frozen and a raging inferno of possibilities. Then Marie spoke up again.
“You've got a deal, Jubes. And if Remy doesn't get the hint after seeing you in that delicious little bikini, I'll help you set up the same thing with him. We can do a photo shoot.” Her voice dripped with sexually deprived malice.
Now it was Remy's turn to look shell-shocked, and Logan might have laughed if his brain had still been functioning. Meanwhile, the two women were laughing darkly at Marie's last statement.
“Hell, Rogue, once we had 'em tied up like that we could do more than a photo shoot. We could make a fucking porno! Imagine it. The two of them tied side by side to one of the king-sized guest beds, naked and at our mercy for once, the fuckers, and us 'disciplining' them! Oh, the whole thing's so delicious I almost want to do it anyway!”
“Let's see how the pool experiment works, Jubes. Then, if we have to, we'll get tough.” Peals of laughter might have belied Marie's words if they had sounded sweet, which they didn't.
“I wonder how long it'll take you to make Logan a gibbering puddle at your feet in that outfit, chica. I'm betting five minutes.”
“Oh, I'm tired of playing games, Jubes. I'm giving him thirty seconds.” Logan could imagine the evil smile on Marie's face as she said this, and he had to swallow hard.
“Hmmm...well, I'm all stretched out. Time to shower and then hit the pool, right?”
“Sure thing. They won't know what hit 'em.”
Logan was very thankful to whomever designed the layout of the gym so that the door to the showers was on the opposite wall from the main doors. He still felt rooted to the spot.
A thought fought its way through to the forefront of his scrambled brain.
Marie wanted his attention. That was fine. He was more than ready to give it to her!
The Wolverine & Rogue Fanfiction Archive
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Story Notes:
So I was just minding my own damn business, working on my goal of 3.5 miles on the elliptical this morning, and this damn bunny came up and just attacked me. Bit me with absolutely no prior warning! I didn't mean to get another story started in my head, but apparently working out can cause hallucinations (or the audio version) so strong you just absolutely HAVE to write them down.
Disclaimer: I don't own them, but I feel sorry for their sexual frustration, so I'm letting them out to play.
Disclaimer: I don't own them, but I feel sorry for their sexual frustration, so I'm letting them out to play.
Author's Chapter Notes:
It's not my fault Logan has a dirty mind...
Chapter End Notes:
Well, what do you think is going to happen next?