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It had all gotten kinda quiet, after that.

Reporters, cops, recently-caught-out-and-unfortunately-still-breathing-Senators, they all disappeared back to whatever holes they’d crawled out of. Some quietly, some not so quietly. Some demanding access to a lawyer (that’d be Mystique) and refusing to roll over on what she knew about Osborne until Stark offered her a massive bribe- Or, as Pepper Potts insisting on calling it, “a proportionate and fair contribution to her legal defence fund.” S.H.I.E.L.D had shown up to clear the area as expected, Nick Fury personally coming over to say hello to Logan- Though not Stark, which Marie thought was kinda funny considering how far up the billionaire’s ass she suspected Fury had his hand. Pete Parker had swung through to help with the clean-up, stopping only to say hello to Rogue before getting to work. The amused grin he shot Logan over his shoulder not helping the Wolverine’s mood any though it made Marie smile for the first time that day. It had all felt so awkward: In the two years she’d been civilian Marie supposed she’d just forgotten the weird, wired vibe everyone had in the aftermath of a fight. Forgotten the jagged way your emotions tended to race, the way nobody could sit still or relax. It was why the X-Men had accepted Stark’s invitation to come back to his place once the scene was released: Nobody wanted to go back to the Mansion. Nobody felt like pretending they were fine. They weren’t fine, that was the point. Kit had nearly lost Pyotr, Gambit had watched Daken slice through Jubes. Marie had nearly seen the man she loved (albeit in a complicated, fucked-up way) murdered before her eyes and Logan-

Well, Logan had come face to face with his worst nightmare. He’d turned into an out-of-control animal, the kind that attacks anyone who cares for it simply because they do. Didn’t matter to him that he’d stopped himself from hurting her. Didn’t matter that he’d probably saved her and the rest of the team. Didn’t even matter that it had taken a shit-load of synthetic hormones and a vindictive super-villain with a death wish to even get him to the place where he’d contemplate attacking her. Hell no, that didn’t matter at all. Marie had seen it on his face when he finally pulled away from her: He was ashamed of himself. Ashamed of the beast he’d let to the surface, and what it had wanted to do. He’d saved her life and nearly killed himself in the process, and he was ashamed of it-

There were times, Marie thought darkly, when she really didn’t know whether she wanted to kiss that man or beat him to death with one of his own cigars.

She heard the door to the balcony open then, heard his footsteps. Didn’t need any lingering feral senses- though she had ’em- to know that it was him. He was limping slightly- healing wasn’t at 100% and he wouldn’t let Hank or Joshua take a look- but he still managed to pad out onto Tony’s balcony. Still managed to ghost into place beside her, his beat-up body comfortingly warm and solid beside her in the cool evening air. For a second he just stared out from the balcony, the lights on New York twinkling like stars before him-

And then, very slowly, he reached out and put his hand on hers on the rail. Left it there.

There heat of his skin on hers burned through Marie with an intensity she hadn’t thought she still possessed.

“You okay?” he asked quietly then. He was staring out into space as if he thought it might turn on him or something. His shoulder felt very warm against hers.

“Ah’m good, shuggs,” she answered, “Dandy even.” And she gestured over her shoulder to the party still going on in Tony’s living room. Trying carefully not to register the worry in his stance. He was so easy to read, even after all these years. “Optimus Dick behaving himself in there?”

Logan shot her a small grin. “I think Stark’s days o’ misbehaving are well over, darlin’- Potts is gonna see to that.”

She snickered. “So romance ain’t dead- Good for them.” And despite herself Marie shot him an answering grin, forcing down the slight edge of unease that rose when she did it- After all a week ago she’d thought she’d never smile at him again. But then a week ago she’d managed to convince herself that she was gonna marry Callum and that she loved the asshole. Turned out, a lotta things could change in a week. Besides, ever since she’d kicked Callum to the curb she’d felt different. More centred. Like… Like she was finally back inside her own skin after a lifetime away. Whether she and Logan got back together or not- and she had to admit that given how good he looked right now the deck was kinda stacked in his favour- didn’t matter. She was herself again.

She’d just forgotten how to do that for a while, without Logan and her girls in her life.

Maybe he registered the change in her expression, maybe his sense o’ smell tipped him off but Logan turned to look at her then. Taking in her thoughtful expression, the slight tenseness in her shoulders, the way she was biting her lip. Marie forced herself to meet his gaze, something telling her that the moment she’d been hoping for and dreading ever since she’d found him was coming. The moment where they had that talk they’d never had and he tried to explain what the Hell he’d done. It didn’t scare her the way it once had though; It didn’t feel like the kinda thing that would break her in two. But still, it took him a full minute to do anything but look at her and when he did move, it wasn’t to speak but to brush one of her stripes gently away from her forehead.

“I’d forgotten what it felt like to do that,” he muttered then.

His fingers were hovering at her cheek, the lock of hair still between thumb and forefinger. The heat of his skin reaching out to her in the cool night air. “You smell the same, you know that?” he continued after a moment. “Thought you wouldn’t- But you still smell the same.” And he smiled this weird, half-sad smile she’d never seen from him. The ghost of worry- of sorrow and regret- stealing through his scent. “You know what I wanna talk to you about, don’t you?” he said.

She nodded. “You wanna- We gotta have The Talk.” And she suddenly felt a spike of the old pain twist through her chest, unexpectedly sharp despite everything. She stiffened at the sensation and he moved abruptly away.

“I been thinking about this all night,” he began then, “And I still don’t have a clue how t’do this. I mean, I’m no good with words Marie, you know that. And half o’ me just thinks I’m gonna end up making this a hundred times worse-”

“But you have to tell me.” She spoke over him, arms somehow finding themselves crossed over her chest, holding her heart in place. Suddenly it wasn’t the night air making her feel cold. “I deserve an explanation, it’s more than fair after-” And she waved her hand randomly, still not sure how to put what he’d done to her into words.

“After I broke your heart,” he finished softly. “After I-” He said the words real quick and fast, as if he were pulling his claws out of a wound but Marie still heard them- “After I let you catch me in bed with someone else.”

A long, snarling beat.

“So you-” She wasn’t quite able to believe she’d heard that. “You let me-”

“I let you catch me,” he repeated quietly. “I knew- Hell, Marie, I could smell you soon as you got off the Blackbird. I always knew when you came home.” He managed to tear his gaze away from her, looking once again out over the lights of Manhattan. Pain and regret and guilt pouring offa him, knuckles white with tension there against the rail. Marie could feel anger beginning to coil in her belly but she pushed it down: She wanted to hear what the fuck else he’d done. “I chose a redhead because I knew you’d think it was about Jeannie,” he was saying, real quiet-like. “I made sure nobody else knew, because if they had they’d probably have tried to stop you heading to our room and beaten the shit outta me in the Danger Room the next day.”

“So Kit, Jubes..?”

“You think my head would still be attached to my shoulders if either of them knew what I was up to?” he demanded. “They’da killed me- Or better yet talked me out of it before I did anything as dumb-fuck shitty as I did.” And again he looked away at the lights of Manhattan. Again he took in that deep, hissing breath. “Look, I got exactly two fuckin’ settings when it comes to people I care about, Marie,” he told her. “Angry and Protective. You know this. So do Kitty and Jubes. So does every unfortunate bastard who ever tried to date any of you-” And he turned from her suddenly- he couldn’t look at her- yanking his hands angrily from the rail. Marie could feel herself shaking but she couldn’t seem to make herself stop. “When I realised how you felt about me,” he was saying, “When I realised you weren’t afraid of what could happen- I guess I thought I had to be afraid enough fer the both of us. I thought I needed to drive you far enough away that you’d be safe- Even if it was safe from me-”

Marie couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “Safe from you?” she snapped. “Why the Hell would Ah need t’be safe from you?”

“Because I’m no good fer you!” he snarled at her. “The people who wanted a piece o’ me, they were always gonna be a threat to you! Christ Marie: You think the Blue Bitch would’ve tortured you so many times if she didn’t have a score to settle with me? You honestly think the Hand woulda taken you, he didn’t know you were on my team?” Logan was getting worked up, the tension of having to tell her pouring outta him. She’d never seen him so worked up in her life.“I already know what it feels like to lose you,” he was muttering, “Don’t you get that? I’d already watched you die. I felt you go on Liberty Island: You don’t remember that but I do. And before- that first night in the Mansion, when you drained me. I knew you were a split second from passin’ on because I’d stabbed you in the chest. How do you think it feels to remember that, Marie? Do you think I coulda done anything this fucking stupid if I didn’t have those memories rattling around inside my head?” And he hissed, finally letting the claws loose. Slicing through Tony’s nice, innocent balcony rail with a mere flick of his wrist.

“So you’re telling me this isn’t your fault?” she bit out. Her voice could have cut adamantium, let alone glass. “You’re telling me you hurt me because you had some nasty Goddamn memories in your head? You’re unbelievable.” And she pushed close to him, jabbing him in the chest with every syllable; She honestly didn’t think she’d ever been so fucking mad. “How about the memory o’ you being beaten by Banner, how’s that for a memory?” she snarled at him. “How about watching Magneto- the only bastard who can kill you with his brain, by the way- twist you like a pretzel because you were trying to save mah life? How about-” and she forced her face into his, making sure to make her voice as vindictive as possible- “How about waking up on Liberty Island with the only person you’ve cared about in a year bleeding all over you, and the knowledge that your mutation probably killed him rattling inside your brain? How about them memories Logan?” And she pushed him roughly away from her.

“It’s not the same thing-” he snapped.

“You’re damn fucking right it ain’t! Because Ah didn’t let it be. Ah didn’t let being an X-Man and the shit that goes with it define who and what we were!” And she turned to walk away, suddenly so angry she wasn’t sure what to do- except maybe push Logan off whatever-the-fuck-floor-this-was and see if the bastard would bounce. She made it roughly five steps before he grabbed her and swung her around to him, their bodies colliding, the force knocking the breath outta her. She swung her fist back, tempted to punch him but before she could he wrapped her smaller hand in his massive one. The other arm wrapping around her waist and pulling her until she was against him. Growling all the way. Marie struggled- she wasn’t above kicking or hair-pulling, and she was getting outta here Right The Fuck Now- but it did no good. He had to much of a hold on her. And wasn’t that just the perfect fucking metaphor for their relationship? she mused darkly. Wasn’t that just her and Logan to a T? For a second he didn’t say anything, just kept that vice-like grip on her body and then-

He sighed. Laid his forehead on hers gently. Eyes closed, breath coming sharp and heavy, apparently not even caring that she could now give him a jolt with her skin. “Just stop,” he was saying, “Just stop- That came out wrong-”

“Go to Hell!”

His eyes snapped open at that. “Been there two years, darlin’,” he said quietly. “Don’t intend on going back.” And despite her rage Marie registered the way he said it. Saw his serious, grave look, so different from the cocky bastard she normally knew. What the Hell was going on with him? “Listen to me, Marie,” he was saying tightly. “Listen to me and listen good. I love you. I know that’s not what you wanna hear- I know maybe I gave up the right to tell you that after what I did- But I promise I do. You’re balls-to-bones deeper in me than anything those fuckers from the government ever messed with. Deeper in me than adamantium, deeper than the fucking claws under my skin.”

“Ah don’t care,” she muttered.

“And I don’t believe that.” She opened her mouth to retort but this time he was the one who spoke first. “You came looking fer me even after what I’d done,” he was saying. “You fought fer me- You even saved me from myself when nobody else could reach me back in Central Park.” And he let go of her fist, fingers trailing across her cheek instead. The expression on his face everything she’d ever wanted from him, but nothing like she’d admit to wanting now. “You love me, Marie,” he was saying, “I know that. I’ll believe that til the day I die.”

For the first time she felt her throat tighten, tears threatening; He’d managed to do with gentleness what he couldn’t do with rage. “So what?” she muttered, “So fucking what, Logan?” And she stiffened, the pain in her chest jolting right the way through her, an ache she hadn’t believed could still hurt this creeping through her like a hurricane. “It’s done, we’re through, you saw to that. There’s nothing you can do about it now-”

He shook his head. “Not fucking true, darlin’-”

“You know it is-”

“I don’t know jack shit.” And suddenly, very gently, she felt his lips on her skin. Felt that warm, wanted mouth brush across her collarbone, lips trailing down until Logan was kissing her right where that ache of emotion was centred. Kissing her right on the plane above her heart. It wasn’t like in Vegas: it wasn’t mouths and tongues together, a struggle for dominance and heat. It wasn’t a kiss between lovers exactly, nor was it a kiss between friends. But it was her kiss- no, their kiss. The kind you only experience when you were with someone you actually fucking loved. Logan didn’t push it, he didn’t force her back against the railing or let his hands wander across her skin. He just kissed her softly, his arms around her and his scent in her hair and when he let her go he was shaking ever so slightly, just like she was.

Rogue really wasn’t sure why she wanted to cry now.

“I know what I did to you, Marie,” he said. He was looking straight at her. “I know because whenever you talk about it I see it there-” And he laid that big, heavy hand over her heart. Resting on the spot that ache inside her spread from, the epicentre of her pain. Now she knew why she wanted to cry. “This is a wound, darlin’,” he was saying. “I know a lot about those- And I know this one’s not even ready to heal yet.” Despite herself Marie shook her head slightly, not ready even now to admit to being hurt. But Christ, she was. “You’ve barely admitted it’s there,” he was saying, “You couldn’t let yourself do. If you’d had your family around you then you mighta done but I was dumb enough to deny you even that.” And just for a second she saw his anger again, that same rage he directed at himself when he’d spoken about being no good for her flashing behind his eyes. “You need time to heal, Marie, I get that,” he was saying, “And I’ll wait until you’re ready, I’ll wait for you. I just can’t pretend that I’m not gonna fight fer you.”

And with that he finally let her go.

For a second Rogue felt completely disorientated, the loss of his closeness a wrench despite how angry she felt. The night air jolting her like an electric shock across her skin. She didn’t know what she wanted to say to him, she didn’t know what to do; Logan had padded back over to the balcony door and was pulling it open; she could see the stress he was trying to hide from her in the set of his shoulders but she didn’t try to stop him go. She couldn’t. She wouldn’t. She didn’t know what on Earth she wanted to do. She just stared out at the Manhattan skyline, at the lights of the offices twinkling and she tried to work out what was going on inside her. Tried to work out what was Rogue and what was Logan and what was Marie. She didn’t know how long she stood there, staring out at the lights of Manhattan but it felt like centuries-

And then she heard Tony clear his throat behind her.

“Jubes and Kit are heading back to Westchester,” he said. Man, he sounded nervous. “They wanted to know if you needed a ride?”

“Ah ain’t going back to Westchester,” she hissed without thinking. Westchester meant the Mansion and the Mansion meant Logan, and she really didn’t think she could handle that right now. Tony seemed to understand because he nodded, raking a hand through his dark hair and making it stick up all over the place. It made him look about five years old.

“Thought you might say that so I had house-keeping make up one of the spare apartments for you. Should be enough for one night.” He shot her a tiny smile. “You can decide what you wanna do in the morning.”

Marie blinked, surprised at his thoughtfulness. “Thanks,” she said softly. “Ah just-” She shrugged. She didn’t have a clue how to say what she felt. “Ah just need some time, ya know?”

Stark nodded. “Believe me, I know.” And he reached into his pocket, pulling out a key card. Handing it to Marie brusquely, apparently as nervous as the average man around an overly emotional girl. It was almost endearing, and suddenly she could see what had Pepper Potts so hooked on him. There was more to the man than just a shit-eating grin. Marie gave him a tight nod as she took the card, checking the room number and trying to work out where it was in relation to Stark’s place. The billionaire backed towards the balcony door, his job apparently done for the night; He pulled it open and muttered something quietly to Kitty, before going to pull the door shut. But at the last minute he stopped, seemed to steel himself. Walked back to her, his expression almost like it’d been back in the underground compound. Grim and ready for a fight.

“I knew I loved Pepper about ten minutes after I met her,” he told her then. “Just kinda- clicked. Like the way you know your math’s right, or you’ve worked out the answer to a problem that’s been bugging you.”

Marie knew she was scowling. “How nice for you.”

He looked at her, real straight and steady. As game faces went, his was among the best. “It wasn’t nice for me, Rogue,” he said quietly. “It wasn’t nice at all. Pepper’s- human. Fragile. I thought she was so easy to break. I convinced myself that she couldn’t handle what life with me would throw at her, so I married someone who could. Or at least, I thought I did.” He shook his head. “Emma Frost was the toughest woman I ever met: I respected her, I might have even loved her- But not like I loved Pepper. Never like I loved her.” And he looked away, as if lost in his own memories. Guilt threading through his scent.

Marie narrowed her eyes. “Why are you telling me this?”

He turned back to her and for the first time since she’d met him Tony looked like an adult. It was the face of a man who knew his inventions cost lives. “Because I did something stupid,” he said, “and someone else paid for it. I know I got Pepper hurt, and I probably got Emma killed. Didn’t mean for things to go down like they did but shit happens and you can’t change it. You can only know you’re an asshole and try to do better next time.” He leaned closer to her, his expression intent. For a second the ache in her heart felt really far away. “I don’t know if this has anything to do with you,” he was saying, “Or to do with Logan, but I just thought I’d tell you what happened to me. Because there’s no point in being alone if you don’t have to be- And there’s no point in letting go of someone you love until you’re sure it’s the right thing for you. That’s just stupid, and you’re not stupid, Rogue-”

And with that he went back into his apartment. His expression flirtatious and happy as if nothing had happened at all. Marie waited a beat before following him inside, her expression confused, her head still reeling-

But three hours later, in the middle of a sleepless night Logan got a text message.

Stark Towers is forty five minutes from you by bike, it read.