Marie sat at her desk, fidgeting with the pen in her hand. Her journal was open on the desk in front of her, but she hadn't written a word.
The reports on the news had been just awful. They'd watched for over a hour, until she just couldn't take it any more and she'd escaped up here to try and collect her thoughts.
She still didn't know exactly what had happened. The newscasters had just gone over the same few details over and over, showing images of buildings in flames and a few blurry shots of figures half-obscured by smoke. There had been gunfire, and an explosion, and no one really knew what had happened with the team-the Professor was closeted in his office and no one was telling the students anything. Marie was seriously worried, and there was no one to confide in except the stupid book in front of her. She couldn't talk to Kit and Jubes, not now, not after having listened to all their silly gossip, because she hadn't told them earlier and now it seemed way too strange to suddenly claim a relationship that she wasn't even sure she was really in.
“Logan,” she said out loud, and her voice sounded strange to her. She'd been so shocked at seeing him again, and then so overwhelmed by his presence, to spare a moment to think about what would happen afterwards.
That seemed to be the theme in her life, she thought ruefully. Act first, think later. She put the pen down, abandoning any pretense that she was going to be able to write. What the hell was going on here? She'd told herself over and over that everything Kitty and Jubes had said was just hearsay, nothing but rumors and scuttlebutt. She'd be an idiot to listen to that. He hadn't seemed anything like what they'd all heard. He wasn't violent, or mean, or out of control. She'd never felt a moment's menace from him, not even when she'd been alone with him, a perfect stranger, out in the middle of nowhere.
The animal magnetism thing was true enough, though. Marie rubbed a hand over her face wearily. What would a man like him want with her? She couldn't understand it. She remembered the way he'd talked to her after their first encounter, calling her beautiful, saying everything she'd ever imagined hearing from a lover.
Maybe it was easy for him to talk that way to someone he'd assumed he'd never see again. He certainly hadn't said much the night before, except to tell her no one needed to know about them. She pressed her hands against her suddenly burning cheeks. She didn't even want to go where that line of thought was taking her. He'd seemed so pleased to see her; she'd swear he hadn't been faking that. And he'd wanted her. Just the memory of the look in his eyes when he'd laid her down on her bed was enough to increase her pulse by a healthy amount.
But for how long? She got up and moved to her window. She loved the view her little room had of the grounds and the woods behind the Mansion; it was one of the reasons she'd picked this little out-of-the-way single in the first place. Well, that and the fact that having roommates was tiring when your skin was capable of killing them by mistake. It was easier to at least have one place where she could dispense with gloves and scarves, or clothing entirely if she felt like it.
Every thought seemed to be leading her back down exactly the same path, and she was sick of wondering and worrying about him. She just wanted the team to get back, so she'd know he was all right. She told herself that she was just being silly. Everything would be fine as soon as he got back.
She heard a familiar rumble as the Blackbird roared over the horizon and the hidden hangar doors began to open, out on the grounds, and suddenly her uncertainty was gone. She ran for the elevator without a moment's hesitation.
Marie punched in her code to the floor that housed the hangar and more of the special features that no ordinary school would ever have. She shuffled her feet nervously as the elevator descended, and hurried down the long, gleaming hallway that led to the Blackbird's landing bay. She skidded to a halt when angry voices reached her ears.
“I want you to stay away from me and the fuck away from Jean.” That was Scott Summers, and hearing the normally-controlled team leader swear was enough of a shock to freeze her in place.
“Summers, if you don't get your head outta your ass it's gonna grow roots there.” And that was Logan. Even though Marie couldn't see him, the low, threatening tone Logan was using was the first intimation she'd had yet of where all the rumors came from. “There ain't nothin' between me and Jeannie and you know it. We're just playin' around.”
“That's the whole problem, isn't it? Your whole goddamn identity revolves around being this badass Romeo. You've never been serious about any of this, not the team, not Jean, not anyone.”
“You better watch it, bub.” There was a crash and Marie gasped, but it was apparently something inanimate that had hit the hangar floor. “You're gonna say something you can't take back in a minute.”
“What makes you think I'd want to take it back? I am sick of this, Logan. You show up here after five years and you think you run the team? Fuck you. You just put people in danger because you're too independent to take an order. People I care about, even if you don't. Just because you had to show off in front of-”
“I'm not gonna take this crap. I told you already, my commlink wasn't working. No one got hurt.” Something else was thrown against a wall or the floor with a clatter. “You don't want my help, fine. Next time you can haul your team's ass outta the fire by yourself. I'm gone.” And he stormed out, fortunately in a different direction, because Marie couldn't have moved at that moment to save her life.
There was more banging; Scott was apparently taking his frustration out on the equipment now that Logan was no longer there. Marie backed up until she was against the wall, because her knees suddenly felt weak.
“Scott?” Jean's voice echoed a little from the other end of the hangar, from the entrance closest to the medical facility. “What just happened?”
“Nothing.” A lid was slammed down. “How are the kids?”
“They'll be fine. What about you?”
“Jean-”
“It was just a kiss, Scott. Don't do this.”
Marie turned and fled back up the hallway. There was no way she was going to listen to any more of this.
**********************************************
Jean came a little further into the hangar. “Scott. Will you look at me?”
Her husband turned around and crossed his arms. “What?” But now he sounded more sullen than angry, and she knew the worst was over. She crossed the huge room to him.
“You have got to stop letting him get to you like that. You know perfectly well he does it just to drive you crazy.”
“Yeah? And what about leading you straight into a building that blew up ten minutes later, after I expressly told him not to?”
“It was my fault as much as Logan's. He had a broken comm unit, Scott. I heard you and I didn't realize he hadn't, and then I saw the kids-you know Logan would never deliberately ignore an order.”
The team leader sighed. “I guess.” He reached out and pulled Jean into his arms. “I was just scared for you.”
“I know. But we're all right. He's exactly the man you want to have on the team if you do need to improvise-and that's what he did. We wouldn't have gotten to those kids if he hadn't gone into the building that way.”
“I know.” Scott's arms tightened around his wife. “All right, I know. I'm sorry. I'll talk to him.” He gave a short, half-reluctant laugh. “I'm pretty sure I know where to find him.”
“Scott…” Jean looked up at him. “Don't get in their way, all right?”
Scott stroked her smoke-streaked cheek gently. “You really think he's serious about her?”
She nodded. “Yeah. I'm sure of it.” She put her head down on Scott's shoulder and they just held each other quietly for a long moment.
***********************************************
Marie slammed and locked the door of her room and then leaned back against it, She felt sick. Obviously Jubilee's gossip connection had been more accurate than usual.
She started towards her bed, planning to hide her head under the pillows and cry herself out. Then she stopped. They had slept together here, just last night. He'd left her there not twelve hours ago, so it hadn't taken him even a day to go after Dr. Grey again. Angrily she pulled the sheets and blankets off the bed and hauled them to the closet, stuffing them into the hamper. It wasn't nearly big enough for the huge wad of material and as she tried to force the armload in, the wicker sides suddenly gave way, splintering and stabbing into her finger. “Ow! Shit!.” She dropped the bedclothes and brought her bleeding digit to her mouth. Tears stung her eyes.
It was her life in a nutshell. Jean didn't try to attract attention, she never seemed to have to try to do anything, she just went about her life and people did whatever it took to be around her. And she certainly didn't leave a trail of destruction in her wake wherever she went. She didn't even want Logan, she had Scott. It wasn't fair.
She felt her face grow heated with shame as she thought about the way she'd absolutely thrown herself at the school's most legendary womanizer, not once but twice. The first time, all right, she hadn't known who he was. But last night-
He must have thought it was his lucky week, running into the easy lay twice in a row. She kicked at the mound of linen, wincing as her foot hit the broken edge of the hamper. Then she froze as there was a knock at her door, and a second later the doorknob rattled.
“Marie?”
It was him. And he sounded really pissed. She shrank back into the closet, wanting only to hide until he just went away, but she tripped over the scattered sheets and fell with an ungainly thump right onto her backside. “Goddamnit,” she swore under her breath.
“Marie, you all right?” Now he sounded concerned, and no wonder. She'd done nothing but trip over her own feet ever since she'd met him. She was suddenly furious, with him, with herself, with everything.
“I'm fine. Go away.”
Logan stood in the hallway, thunderstruck. What the fuck? Had the entire Mansion suddenly gone nuts, or what? “Marie, what the hell is going on? Open up.” He rattled the doorknob again.
“No. I don't want to see you. Just go away.” She sounded like she was crying, and he had absolutely no idea what she was upset about. After the ugliness he'd just seen and the fight with Summers, he'd just wanted to get back to her, hold onto her for a while and
forget about all that. Now apparently he'd walked into some other hornet's nest.
He didn't understand, and he was tempted to pop the claws through the ridiculous lock on the door and put an end to this bullshit right here and now, but he stopped himself with an effort. He was exhausted and too irritable to be able to deal with this rationally right now; he'd just scare the shit out of her and that wouldn't help.
“Fine.” He heard her moving inside the room and waited for a few seconds to see if she was going to come to the door. She didn't. “I'm going. But I will talk to you later.” He gave it one more minute before stalking away down the hallway towards his own room.
Marie, huddled against the wall just outside of the closet, put her head down on her knees and let the tears she'd been holding back begin to trickle down her cheeks.
Oh, God. What now? She couldn't run away again; it hadn't worked the last time and if she left again it would just look ridiculous. He'd lose interest in her fast enough, of course, but she just hoped he made good on his words to Scott and left. Soon.
If she had to see him around the Mansion for long, she didn't think she'd be able to handle it.
**********************************************
Logan caught a glimpse of Marie sidling through the library doors. He had had about enough of this. It had been three days; short of camping outside her door he'd done everything he could to catch her alone and he hadn't succeeded yet. He still had exactly no idea what she was so angry about, but there was no question that she was deliberately avoiding him. She didn't appear in the dining room at meals, she wasn't in her room during the day, and any time he did catch sight of her she was surrounded by her little friends and studiously ignoring his presence.
He started down the hallway towards Jeannie's office. She was good at giving advice, she certainly knew Marie better than he did, and he had no better ideas. Unfortunately, just as he was getting to the door it opened and Summers came out. Logan jerked his head in acknowledgement-Summers had come across with an apology of sorts the day after the mission, if you could count “I know it wasn't all your fault” as an apology, so he supposed preserving the decencies was in order. Obviously, though, now wasn't going to be a good time to see Jean, so he put his head down and pretended he'd been on his way somewhere else.
He was about ten steps down the hallway when Summers spoke. “She was in the hangar when we got back.” Logan turned. Summers had his arms crossed defensively.
“Say again?”
“Marie. She used her code on the elevator the day of the mission.” The younger man spoke in a reluctant tone, and it was one of those times Logan really hated the ruby-quartz lenses that didn't allow him to read his expression properly. “She must have heard us fighting.” Summers took a step towards him. “I just thought you might want to know.”
“Oh, yeah?” Logan raised an eyebrow. Considering Summers' reaction to the very idea that he'd even touched Marie, this was, to say the least, surprising. “How come?”
“Look, Logan, I really am sorry. I got personal with some of those things I said and that was wrong. I do get that you're serious about her. I just didn't want to see her get hurt, that's all.” He twisted his mouth into a wry smile. “Guess I'm not doing such a bang-up job of watching out for her either.” He held out a hand. “Truce?”
Logan came back down the hallway and took Summers' hand. “Permanent détente.” They shook hands and then Logan strode off, back towards the library. He was going to talk to Marie right now, come hell or high water.
****************************************
Marie knew Logan was coming even before the library door moved; she'd been on constant alert for his tread in the hallway for the last three days and she'd have heard it even if it hadn't been so quiet in the room. The door opened and she stared fixedly at the page in front of her, although she'd had the book open to the same page for the last twenty minutes and still had no idea what was on it. Please, please just get out of here.
He didn't. He came straight across the room to her, put a hand on either side of her armchair, and leaned over her. “Come on. We need to talk.”
“I'm reading.” She turned a page deliberately, keeping her eyes down. Then the book was jerked out of her hands.
“I don't really give a fuck if you're reading. I've been lookin' for you for three days and you know it. I'll give you a choice: you can come talk to me somewhere private or I'll talk to you right here. Right now.”
Her eyes came up against her better judgment and certainly against her own will. The second she saw those hazel eyes burning into hers she knew he meant it; he was perfectly capable of yelling at her in front of everyone who happened to be present. Reluctantly, she nodded. Once. “Fine. Where do you want to go?”
“Come on.” He stood up and held out a hand, but she ignored it and scooted out of her chair sideways to avoid touching him. She followed him out of the library and into one of the common rooms, one that was furnished as a reception area and that was usually deserted except for special functions. He closed the door behind them and then turned to face her, standing in front of the door as if he knew she'd bolt through it if he only gave her the chance. Marie wished fervently that she had Kitty's mutation, just for ten minutes. It was a good thing Kit hadn't happened to be in the library, or she might have borrowed it.
“You want to tell me what the problem is?” His tone was unexpectedly gentle, and it threw her even further off balance.
“I don't have a problem.” He looked at her for a long minute, seemingly waiting for her to say something else, and then shook his head.
“I know you must've heard something the other day. When you were down on the hangar level.” Her heart skipped a beat. How the hell did he know that? “Tell me what it was.”
He honestly didn't have much recollection of exactly what it was he and Summers had been shouting at each other, but he did remember Jean's name had come up. So it wasn't much of a surprise when she lifted her chin defiantly and retorted, “I heard enough to know who you're really interested in, and it isn't me.”
“You're wrong.” He saw her eyes widen at the straight denial. “You heard somethin' about Jeannie, right? That's bullshit.” He took a step towards her. “Believe me, darlin'. Jeannie and me, we're just friends.”
“Don't call me that,” she gritted out, and he saw that she was close to tears.
“Why not?” he asked, and she didn't answer. “I've known Jean for a long time, Marie. It's just a dumb habit, flirtin' with her.”
“Yeah, right. That's why Mr. Summers wanted to throw you off the team,” she shot back. Logan passed a hand over his face. Jesus.
“He was pissed at me because of something that happened on the mission,” he explained tiredly. “He's over it. You can ask him.” She clearly wasn't believing a word he was saying. “Look, if I wanted Jeannie, why would I have left five years ago? They've only been married two years, Marie. Do the math. I'm not like that.”
“I don't know. Maybe you just can't stand bein' turned down.” He raised an eyebrow. Well, he'd known she had a lot of fight in her. “Maybe you just came back to see if she changed her mind. All I know is, it's obvious no one comparing the two of us would pick me. And I don't care about bein' second choice. I mean, you didn't even want anybody to know you knew me.” She glared at him.
“You're out of your mind.” He shook his head in sheer disbelief. “ What's the matter with you? Haven't you ever looked at yourself?” He strode across the room and seized her wrist and, before she could pull away, turned her around to face a mirror that hung on one wall. She turned her head and he reached up to pull her hair loose from the ponytail she had it scraped into. “Come on. Look.”
Marie looked up, but he got the feeling she was watching his reflection, not hers. She tried to pull back, but he held her in place. Then she burst into tears, and he knew he'd gone too far.
Relenting, he let her go. “I'm sorry. But Christ, Marie-” He shoved a hand through his hair, hoping she'd get herself under control. “You've got it all wrong.”
“I don't think so.” She sniffled and wiped the back of one hand furiously over her cheeks. “Is that all? Can I go now?”
Logan stepped away from the door and she made a beeline for it. “Marie!” She stopped, but didn't turn back. “Just think about it, all right? Take your time, but if you want to talk to me…” He threw up a hand in frustration. “I'll be around.”
She waited only a second to be sure he was finished before opening the door and practically running away from him. He stood there, staring after her.
Well. That went just great.
The Wolverine & Rogue Fanfiction Archive
Barely Legal Since 2000
Author's Chapter Notes:
Well. That went just great.