After dinner, Hank retired to the med lab to cautiously attempt to cook up a medicated balm for his underarm irritation. Storm stayed secluded in her room, although she was going a bit insane trying to locate the source of the random beeping that emanated from somewhere in her attic refuge every few minutes, or sometimes twice in a few seconds. But it was never sounded long enough for her to locate its source. The Annoy-a-tron device Pyro had purchased online several weeks ago was a slice of evil genius even Rogue herself was envious of.
When Storm was finally about to lose her mind, she rang the downstairs line in the kitchen and demanded Logan come to her room immediately to assist her. After getting over the initial shock of seeing Storm’s formerly platinum tresses now an eye watering shade of robin’s egg blue, Wolverine joined the search. Even with his enhanced senses, Logan spent the better part of an hour with Storm tearing apart her formerly peaceful sanctuary in a vain effort to locate the quarter sized device that was programmed the generate a short, annoying beep of varying volumes randomly timed anywhere from 45 seconds apart to almost 10 minutes (AN: This is a real device you can buy online). Kitty surreptitiously phased her face the tiniest fraction into a darkened corner of the attic space to confirm Logan and Ororo’s effort to locate the infuriating device were fruitless, and withdrew to report into her sleeve mic the objective was achieved was going swimmingly.
Rogue acknowledged completion and gave Jubilee the go-signal to enter the garage with Kitty and get to work . Hank was hiding in his in the med lab, the power couple were having blazing row in the backyard over Jean’s secret stash of Wolverine-esque masturbatory reading material, and Logan and Ro were demolishing a section of drywall in her room the weather goddess insisted the beep was coming from. A little while later Gambit whispered urgently into the comm that Logan had given up on locating the source the maddening noise in Storm’s room and was returning downstairs in a temper.
Rogue shifted on her power smile again and “accidentally” greeted him at the bottom of stairs with a cold beer. “You don’t look like you’re having a good day sugah,” and she held out the icy cold Molson to him. The look of pure adoration on Logan’s face almost, almost made her rethink what they were doing.
Then he grunted “Thanks, kid,” snatched the bottle from her hands and stalked to the staff rec room without a backwards glance. Her fleeting sympathy was squashed as she called out “There’s more in the mini-fridge” at his retreating back and all she got was a stiff jerk of his head before he pounded open the rec room door with a fist and banged it behind him.
“Hope he likes his severely expired beer at a balmy 96 degrees thanks to John,” she thought to herself evilly.
While Jubilee and Kitty finished their work in the garage, Rogue sat in the library, deserted now that all the students were in bed, coordinating via comm with Bobby, John, and Gambit on the final act. Her three male teammates had gallantly offered to attach new doors to Logan and Scott’s doorframes, Xavier always having extras on hand in the basement storage room as it was not an uncommon occurrence to have to replace them on a regular basis at a school where people could stick to, blow up, or puke acid on every surface on it. The Cyclops demolition had been an unexpected bonus which allowed them easy access to the room while their occupants were occupied having makeup, blindfolded sex in the gazebo out back or cursing at not only their favorite hockey team losing but discovering the fridge was busted and all the beer was skunked. Scott and Jean’s toilet was covered in translucent saran wrap under the seat, and when Logan next took a shower he would be in for an unhappy surprise when Kool-Aid mixed with water in the showerhead and he got a face full of Strawberry Banana Tropical Punch.
Final stages of sabotage completed, Beta team rendezvoused in Rogue’s room at 1100 hours to crack open half a dozen bottles of delectable French wine Remy had swiped from the Professor’s private stash in the not-so-secret room behind the hidden panel in his office.
“Leave it to Gambit, dis is the good stuff,” the thief grinned as he lounged on the floor at the foot of Rogue’s bed, one leg kicked lazily over the other, cradling a half empty bottle of Petrus Pomerol 1998 like it was a long lost lover.
“No, the good stuff was the look on Storm’s face when Logan accidentally clawed through the electrical wiring in her wall looking for the Annoy-a-tron!” Kitty crowed, her head resting in Bobby’s lap as he stroked her hair.
“Oh god, do it again, please!” Tears were twinkling in Iceman’s blue eyes. He was laughing so hard he didn’t even notice his tears were crackling into tiny icicles as they froze on his cheeks. Kitty leapt from Bobby’s embrace and pounced onto Rogue’s bed. She snikted out 3 fingers into an imaginary wall then started twitching like she was having a seizure. Pyro bounded up behind her and pulled her hair into up spikes all over her head.
“Someone should remind him that metal is an excellent conductor for electricity!” he guffawed and flopped down with a bounce that knocked Kitty off the bed onto Gambit, almost spilling a marvelous bottle of Chateau Latour Pauillac 1990. Remy leapt to her aid.
“Non ma belle, don’t spill it. Tis a crime!” the Cajun admonished as he rescued the bottle from Jubilee’s tenuous grip. They all started laughing again.
Rogue took the saved bottle from Remy and took a long draw, then wiped her the back of her hand across her mouth. “I wonder if Beast has found the 10 packets of jello you and John dumped in his toilet,” she drawled to Iceman.
“If he has it’s probably already under a microscope, and he’s analyzing it to determine if a new mutant suck into the mansion through the sewage lines,” Bobby sniggered. That sent them all into gales of laughter, rolling all over the place and each other, clutching their sides. They were all feeling excellent, a little drunk not just on the sweet vintages they were demolishing but giddy also on sweet, sweeeeet victory. They all crowded onto Rogue’s king sized bed, passing bottles back and forth and recounting the various successes of the day. They all were grinning miles wide.
Then Rogue leaned over and kissed Remy’s neck long and slow. Red on black eyes twinkled in delight, “Oui chere, it’s about time,” he murmured as he tilted his neck back to allow her further access and slipped one hand across chest to quickly unbutton her blouse, allowing breasts encased in an emerald green satin push up bra to spill out. Jubilee practically ripped Pyro’s shirt off while Iceman and Kitty were both already stripped down to their skivvies.
All the Beta women starting moaning loudly and wriggling all over the bed and their teammates while the guys groaned, “Yes…come one…that’s it…louder,” their hands hands wandering over previously forbidden curves, pinching and caressing. Kitty squealed as John’s tongue flicked over her bare shoulder. Jubilee cackled with delight when Remy’s hand slapped her bottom hard. Rogue played tonsil hockey with Iceman for a moment before scratching his chest hard, making him shout. They were all laughing and groaning and making quite a racket and none of them cared. This was it, what they were going to reward themselves with for their weeks of careful planning and hard work. They deserved it.
Feet thundered up the stairs and before any of them realized what was happening, Rogue’s bedroom door flew apart under the force of Wolverine’s claws. He kicked the remaining remnants out with his boots and stormed into the room. Five seconds was all took for him to take in the severely underdressed state of the entire Beta team and only .0031 seconds after that to see Gambit’s hand under Rogue’s bra kneading a breast that belong to HIM and one of Rogue’s hands tangled in Pyro’s hair as the flameboy looked up surprised from between Kitty’s legs.
“WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?!?!?” Wolverine roared. The sound of more footsteps resounded through the X-men’s wing as Storm, Hank, and a decidedly ruffled looking Scott and Jean crashed into the room.
“What’s going on? Where is it?” Scott’s hand flicked uselessly to the scarf still tied over his eyes, forgetting for a moment he had no protective eyewear.
“They’re naked!” Storm spluttered, then turned to bury her face in Hank’s wife-beater covered chest, mortified at what she was seeing.
“Who’s naked?” Scott’s head tilted inquiringly.
“Half-naked, actually,” Jean said soothingly, patting her husband on the head. “The junior X-men, dear,” she answered to Scott’s confused expression around the horrible scarf.
“That’s Beta team to you, Tweety Bird,” Jubilee giggled over Bobby’s shoulder, mindless that her boobs were hanging in Kitty’s face.
Logan gritted his teeth. “That still doesn’t explain what you are doing! Especially YOU,” he spat with a venomous tone as he shot out 3 claws and pointed them at the hand Gambit still had in Rogue’s bra.
“Mon ami, we jus celebratin.” The Cajun smiled lazily, lifting the hand that hand been massaging Jubilee’s thigh to grab a forgotten bottle of wine and slop it over his mouth. Kitty leaned over to lick it off while Rogue massaged the brunette’s neck.
Claws itching to kill, cock threatening to explode out of his jeans, Wolverine ground out, “Celebrating what?”
“April Fool’s sugah,” Rogue drawled, trailing a finger absently down Gambit’s bare chest.
“What?!” the entire Alpha team bleated at once.
“April Fool’s sugahs.” Rogue then stood up off the bed, holding out a hand to Remy and Kitty, pulling them up with her. She wound herself around the tiny brunette’s slender frame, the sexy little woman swathed only in the lightest baby blue matching bra and panty set. The rest of Beta crawled off each other and the bed to surround their team leader and secret weapon. They all laid a caressing hand on a bare part of Kitty’s body and as she phased them through the floor down to the garage, all of Beta screamed “BETA TEAM RULES, ALPHA DROOLS! LOSERS!!!”
The Alpha team stood there frozen, traumatized, positively gobsmacked for a good 2 minutes, utterly shocked and horrified that the kids, children, they had practically raised and trained to fight the good fight had used the talent they were born with the training the senior X-men had given them to torture them so.
Only when Kitty quickly phased halfway up through the floor behind Logan and grabbed his jeans, phasing them back with her through the floor in a world class mutant pantsing, shouting, “And we were kidding with the orgy!” did the Alpha team leap into action (and Logan into a new pair of pants and his leather jacket) and raced towards the garage as they heard an engine roar to life.
By the time Logan and the rest of the senior X-men made it to the garage Rogue and her merry band of miscreants were already off school grounds in the modified Hummer X-van and making tracks at the speed of light for the secret beach house on Cape Cod Professor Xavier’s had secured for them in exchange for their agreement not to destroy the mansion during their mission. Can’t keep anything from a telepath, y’know. Bobby had taken the liberty of freezing off the tracking device from the van then covering the driveway behind them in a 3 inch sheet of ice to ensure their clean getaway.
Scott and Beast moaned in horro at the sight of all the automobiles in the garage phased halfway up their wheels into the floor. The roar of murderous fury from Logan when he saw Jubilee had pimped his bike with a bright yellow paint job, streamers from the handlebars, and smiley face bell sent the rest of his teammates running for the house. Jean and Ororo immediately raced at breakneck speed for the liquor cabinet and hid Storm’s pulverized attic room for the rest of the night, getting off their face, and eventually they learned to ignore the relentlessly random beeping from the Annoy-a-tron. Scott and Hank locked themselves in the lab with a bag of indica Hank had confiscated from a student previously and kept intending to flush but couldn’t now that his toilet was blocked up with Kiwi-Strawberry gelatin.
And Wolverine? Well, he proceeded to spend the rest of the evening clawing apart the floor of the garage to free the cars and plotting revenge. Especially on Rogue…and Gambit’s hands.
The next morning Scott came into the garage, happily patting his repaired visor, and admired Wolverine’s handiwork; he'd managed to rip all the cars free without a lot less damage than the fearless leader expected. Logan was leaning over the hood of his jeep, half asleep on his feet.
“Logan?” Scott, gently shook his teammate's shoulder. “Logan? Did you know you have a giant Hello Kitty on the back of your jacket?”
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Viola! Only 1.5 hours late!
Chapter End Notes:
Heh heh.