I heard from a friend today
And she said you were in town
Suddenly the memories came back to me in
My mind
Ororo told her that he was home. She couldn’t help but wonder why he hadn’t told her himself. Maybe it was that he figured she still loved him. She had told him three days after Jean’s death at the flooding of Alkali Lake. He said he wanted her, too. She held him that night as they made love under the stars in the green house. He disappeared a few hours later, not a goodbye to anyone. Not a note. He only left an empty room and a painful gift.
It rained the next day, as she sat in her room, all alone, crying. She had told Bobby everything that happened, and when he said they could make it work between them, she ended it. She had hoped that Logan would return. She always thought the rain was the angels crying for her broken soul.
How can I be strong I've asked myself
Time and time I've said
That I'll never fall in love with you again
During those five long years, things had changed drastically for her. She had been forced to grow up in only a few short months. It was only three weeks after she gave herself to Logan that she found she was pregnant. That had only been the beginning of everything. She had taken the life of a fellow mutant, a woman she had admired greatly. Carol Danvers had been the one to help her the most after his departure. She had died after falling onto Rogue’s unconscious body when her absorption powers came alive and took everything from her. Rogue had gained the ability to fly and a super strength that had destroyed everything she touched until she learned to control it. She was also invulnerable to physical pain. Of course, not to the pain of having another alive in her mind. It was the test Hank ran on her that informed everyone of her pregnancy.
Carol Danvers wanted her life back. She didn’t want to be trapped inside Rogue. She blamed the younger woman for what had happened to her, and she tried desperately to take over. If it hadn’t been for the rest of the team, she might have won.
Rogue had grown even more after the Cajun, Remy, had joined them. They had fallen for each other almost immediately, but after everything she had gone through with Carol and her heart break with Logan, she didn’t want to risk anything anymore.
A wounded heart you gave,
My soul you took away
Good intentions you had many,
I know you did
She knew he wanted her to be happy. He was her protector. He didn’t love her. She saw that when he kissed her after everything without any protection. He called her every day for the next five years to check on her, to make sure she was alright. She never told him of their children, a boy and girl, twins. She never told him of everything she had felt. She never even said hello. She refused to talk to him, afraid that if she heard his voice, she wouldn’t be able to stop loving him anymore.
How can I be strong I've asked myself
Time and time I've said
That I'll never fall in love with you again
I come from a place that hurts,
God knows how I've cried
No one knew of the pain she still held on to. She would cry when she was in the shower, and put on a mask when she was with the others. She would cry alone in her room after Xavier gave her a suite as a baby shower gift the month before her children arrived. She cried when they were in bed, and she would notice just how much like their father they really were.
Lawrence, her son, was the spitting image of what Logan must have looked like when he was a child. Megan was the one who reminded her the most of him. Her personality was the exact same. She even growled as they took her from her mother’s safe womb.
And I never want to return
Never fall again
She had worked so hard to leave the world she had developed for herself to hide in. She didn’t want her children to know the pain that she had gone through because of their father. She didn’t want them to know the pain she couldn’t run from.
She promised herself never to go through that again.
Making love to you felt so good and
Oh so right
She would dream of the night they were together every time she closed her eyes. She remembered of how perfect and wonderful it felt to have his hands roam over her body. The way he touched her and held her made her feel whole. He brought her so much happiness and pleasure that night, she thought she would die happy. The next day was filled with so much pain, she only wanted to die.
How can I be strong I've asked myself
Time and time I've said
That I'll never fall in love with you again
It was after the night she had her babies that she had promised herself that she would never let anyone get too close to her to hurt her again. She had to be strong for not just herself anymore, but for her children also.
So here we are alone again,
Didn't think I'd come to this
And to know it all began
With just a little kiss
“We need to talk, Marie.” She hadn’t been called that name for five years. She was alone, in her living room, cleaning. Her children were out with Scott. He had been the closest thing to a father they had ever known.
“There is nothing to talk about, Logan.” She turned to see him closing the door. She silently cursed herself for leaving it open. He looked to be the exact same as he had been when he left. She knew he didn’t think the same of her.
“Why did I have to find out from a student that you had children? Why did I have to find out from your Cajun boyfriend that they were mine and not his? Why didn’t you tell me?” She could see the pain in his eyes as he spoke and she was torn between killing him and holding him again.
“Because I knew you, Logan.” She could feel the tears slowly roll down her cheeks as she spoke the words that had haunted her for five years. Thoughts she had never told anyone, even after they knew who had gotten her pregnant. “You didn’t want this life. Shit, you didn’t even want me. You were thinking about Jean that night when we made love. Shit, I made love. You fucked. You pictured her while you fucked me. I saw that when you kissed me without anything to protect yourself. That was what made you come back to reality, wasn’t it? When my abilities took hold of you when you kissed me.”
“Yes. I wanted to make love to Jean. But after what happened, I had to leave. I couldn’t stay around and pretend that nothing happened in that green house. I had hoped you could continue with your life as well and get past what you thought you felt for me. I couldn’t look at you anymore. I was disgusted with myself.” Logan took a few steps toward her as she spoke.
“I love you, Logan. I always have. That’s why I couldn’t talk to you when you called. I had myself believing that I had stopped caring for you, but even I knew that if I even heard your voice, everything would come back.” She couldn’t stop from telling him everything. She didn’t know how. “When I had the twins, I thought it was going to kill me to see them look like you. They were the ones who helped me more than anyone else. They were the only reason I didn’t kill myself.”
He walked to her completely then, and took her in his arms. She was too distraught to push him away. He tilted her head up to him and gently kissed her lips for only a second, and it was then she saw everything. The memories of the time he was on the road filled her mind and she saw that he thought of her and dreamed of her and truly loved her. She saw how he would yearn for her. He hadn’t touched anyone in the five years, knowing that no one could compare to her.
I've come too close to happiness,
To have it swept away
Don't think I can take the pain
No never fall in love again
Rogue disappeared the day after Logan confronted her about their children. She spoke to Xavier and told him that she needed to leave. She left Logan a note, explaining that she needed to clear her head. Her and her children were gone. She left for six months so that she could think of what to do next. She prayed she was wrong, but she felt herself falling again.
Logan’s heart was broken, but he knew she was only doing what was best for her and her children. He knew she would be returning.
Kinda late in the game
And my heart is in your hands
“I don’t want to go through this again, Logan, but I have to tell you something.” Rogue was pacing the living room as Logan watched her from the couch. She had returned three weeks earlier, knowing what had to be done. The children had just fallen asleep. They were now six years old. Lawrence was a joy to his teachers, but Megan terrorized them. She truly did have her father’s personality. “I love you, Logan. I tried not to, but I can’t stop it. I feel like I need you with me.”
“I have been waiting to hear those words since I returned, Marie. I love you too, Darlin.” They made love passionately that night, and, seven months later, a very pregnant Rogue married a proud Logan.
Don't you stand there and then tell me
You love me
They had four more years together, and two more children. Both boys that looked just like their father and had their mother’s personality. Their names were Lester and Leonard. They looked up to their older brother with nothing but love and respect. They feared their sister’s wrath.
Then it happened. Logan and Rogue had to leave on an assignment. The children were left in Bobby’s care. They had to battle the Sentinels, and, although Xavier was against it, everyone knew they couldn’t be taken down without the combined forces of the Wolverine and Rogue.
“I love you, Logan. I never stopped doing that, as much as I tried to. I want you to know that now,” Rogue whispered this right before they were attacked.
Then leave again
'Cause I'm falling in love with you again
The Wolverine and Rogue fought side by side as they and their fellow team mates tried to defeat the Sentinels. The battle lasted for more than a day, and in the end, they knew of the only plan that would work. They had to blow up the Sentinel base. Of course, Rogue was the only one who would be able to get in and out fast enough to trap the Sentinels inside. Against Logan’s arguing, she accepted her mission.
Logan watched from the forest surrounding the base, looking for the only woman he gave his heart to completely to escape. He watched as she flew into the sky, and his heart leapt for joy right before the base exploded. She hadn’t been far enough away yet, and Logan watched as the force from the explosion through her deep into the woods.
Hold me, hold me
Don't ever let go
“Marie!” Logan yelled after he sniffed her out. She was laying against a tree, and he could see the blood pooling around her. “Oh God, Marie. Hold on, Baby. Just hold on.” He took off his glove with one motion and dropped it into the blood. He pressed his hand to her cheek and waited for the effect from her powers to start. But nothing happened.
She smiled up at him, knowing what he was trying to do. It was almost as if it was God’s way of giving her one last happiness before she died.
“Just hold me, Logan. Just don’t let me go until I’m gone.” Rogue was beginning to cough as she spoke. He did as she asked and held her close, her body already growing stiff.
Say it just one time
Say you love me
“It’s ok, Logan. It’s alright. I’m just happy that you’re here with me. I don’t want to be alone when I die.” Rogue smiled up at him, trying her damnedest not to cry. She could feel the pain enveloping her. “Tell me you love me, Logan. You’ve never said that. Not even when we were married. Tell me you love me.”
“I love you, Marie. I always have.” He pressed his lips to hers in one last kiss. He felt the love she had for him, and something else. He felt the life draining from himself to her body. He felt every scratch and cut he had ever gotten open up again. He felt his life being drained away. Just before he passed out, he heard the words he and Xavier had shared just after he and Marie were invited to his institute.
~It felt like she was going to kill me.~
~If she would have held on any longer, she would have.~
God knows I do love you again.
Rogue stood by her husband's grave, her boys at her side and her eleven year old daughter in her arms. It had been a year since Logan had gone, and all her children had taken it hard, especially Megan. Rogue only found comfort knowing that her husband, her love, would live on in their children.
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