one more day down
everybody has those days
where one soft sweet song's
just enough to clear my head
It's been a month since I left Xavier's and you, Marie. One month and I don't know much more then I did when I left. I was sitting in some dive bar tonight trying not to think of anything and this song comes on. I don't even know why I remembered it. I just don't remember this kind of thing. But anyway, this song, it made me think. Made me think about you. You're in my head now. You weren't there the first time we touched, but you're there now. I can feel your loneliness and solitude. But this song, you like it. It makes you happy and now it is making me happy. Not happy smiling happy, but happy nonetheless.
fall on real life
is anybody left there sane?
if we slide on over and accept fate
then it's bound to be a powerful thing
I'm sick of looking for something I might never find. I'm sick of living in a past I don't remember. I don't want to do it anymore and I blame you. Maybe blame is a little bit harsh, but it's true. Before you I was fine being alone. I liked being alone. I guess I figured no one else would ever understand me, but that isn't true anymore, is it? You do understand, much better then I would ever wish anyone to understand me.
if it's just that you're weak
can we talk about it
it's gettin' so damn creepy
just nursing this ghost of a chance
the fiction, the romance
and the Technicolor dreams
of black and white people
I've talked to Xavier once since I left. Two weeks ago. I told him how I found nothing at that place that he told me about and then I casually asked about you. He told me about how you were having nightmares and about the change in your behavior Maybe I'll head home soon. Home. I don't remember ever having one. If you weren't there I don't think I would call it home.
one boy head strong
thinks that living here's just plain
He's pushed down so hard
you can hear him start to sink
Something is keeping me out here, away from there, away from you. Guilt. I hate guilt. I feel guilty for being happy that you are trying so hard to hold onto me. I feel guilty for being happy about the connection you and I share. I feel guilty for wanting to have you all to myself. I fell guilty for being so much older then you. I feel guilty for not caring that I am so much older then you.
and it's one last round of petty conversation
you hold on boy cuz
you won't go down like this?
just roll on over
lay down till it's more than you can take
I want to call you, but I don't know what I would say. I want to hear your voice somewhere else then just inside my head. I want to see you. I want to touch you again. I want to make sure that you stay in me and I stay in you. I've actually caught myself wishing we were "normal" people so that we could just do "normal" things. But we aren't. And if we were we probably never would have met and we definitely wouldn't have this connection, but we do and I wouldn't change it for the world.
so one more day down
and everybody's changin'
one more head down
just enough to reach my head
I think I am going to come home. I'm not finding any answers and I'm sick of being alone. And I don't want you to be alone. You deserve more then that and I am a selfish enough bastard to want to be the one to be with you.
yeah if you're weak
can we talk about it
it's gettin' so damn creepy
just nursing this ghost of a chance
the fiction, the romance
and the Technicolor dreams
of black and white people
We are black and white people