It was devastating. The realization. I almost couldn't breath. I had been keeping myself warm nights with thoughts of Jean or was it? I mean you can see why a guy would be attracted to her. But had I really ever actually seen her face in my fantasies? And it isn't what you think. Sure she has legs that won't quit and a nice little rack, but ultimately she was safe. Because I knew she wouldn't choose me. That is what I wanted. She was safe.
Then I found myself lying there underneath that blue bitch masking her self in Rogue's likeness and realization hit me. For a moment I thought I might be sick. It was that shocking. The want!
Want so intense it left me breathless. Want that left me...in awe. And for just a moment all my late night fantasies came into sharp focus. And for once what I want isn't what is safe.
As I watch that sweet face moving toward me I want it to be her. I want it so badly that for a moment I think I can just let it be, but I want something else. When we kiss for the first time I want her. Not a cheap imitation.
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