Sometimes I just hate my fucking life. What ever I do, I end up knee deep in shit. Right now I have a sane wife that hates me, a daughter that’s nearly insane from cocaine withdrawals, and Storm is seriously considering turning me in for assaulting that wanker that screwed up Anna. Fuck. Lesser man would have already taken a rope and… Crap. But as it happens, I don’t give a shit. Never got rid of the pot I took from Anna. Doesn’t really give me even a good buzz, but at least I can fool my head thinking about something else than how to squirm out of this.
“Dad?”
“Hi, pumpkin. Feeling better?”
“Weren’t you the one lecturing me how drugs are bad for me?”
“Never said anything about myself. I heal. You don’t. End of discussion.”
“Come on… It’s just pot. Can I have some?”
“No.”
“Asshole.”
“Love you too, kid.”
Somehow it feels like this relaxing-thing won’t work. Not when Anna’s standing there, hands folded over her chest and tapping the ground with her toes.
“Fine… Tasted like shit anyway. There. It’s gone. Happy?”
“Is it true?”
“What?”
“You did something to Jack.”
“Yeah. And I do it again if that bastard as much as looks at you the wrong way.”
“And mom threw you out?”
“Yeah. She did.”
“What are you going to do now?”
“I was thinking… Well, I could… Fuck. You want the truth?”
“Duh! No. I want the best lie you can come up.”
“I have no idea what am I going to do next. Marie pretty much hates me, so I can’t stay here. I’m guessing you’re siding with her on this. There really isn’t any reason for me to stick around.”
“Dad…”
“I guess I’ll just pack up my stuff and hit the road.”
“Who’s going to bail me out when I do something stupid when you’re not here?”
“Your mom will. Shit. She won’t even let you get in to trouble. She’s more responsible than me. Has always been. And smarter than me. Keep listening to her, Anna. Do as she tells you to, and you’re going to be just fine.”
“I don’t want you to go.”
“Tough luck, kid. Your mom doesn’t want me to stay.”
“There’s something else as well, isn’t there? I can’t believe she’d freak out like that because of Jack.”
“That’s something between me and her.”
“She knows about those women?”
“Anna! Jesus Christ! It’s not like I have been sleeping around…”
“But I know you bring women in to your home.”
“Every now and then. Started when… Shit. You’re not supposed to know about these things!”
“It’s kind of hard not to know when I can smell them on you when you come to pick me up.”
“Yeah… Well, it’s not something I’m proud of. And I haven’t done that often. It’s just… Sometimes it gets so hard. There’s just me and… I miss Marie. It’s so fucking cold and lonely. It helps a little when I can pretend that she’s there.”
“Well, it looks like you get to pretend all you like from now on.”
“Yeah. Anna?”
“What?”
“Could you give your old man a hug?”
It feels like she’d rather strangle me. Doesn’t matter. I guess I’d deserve that. Shit. This is fucking embarrassing. Well, fuck it. Show me a man who’s not able to cry when he’s loosing his whole family and I show you a seriously fucked up bastard.
“Dad? You’re going to… You’re coming back, right?”
“I don’t know, Anna. I don’t know…”
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