Oh, for fuck’s sake… I thought it was damn near impossible for me to get a headache, but this thudding and throbbing feeling right behind my eyes… Either it’s a leftover from our little incident last night, or just my body telling me what my mind already knows. There’s no fucking way back. No way back to what we once had. What we once were.
After we fucked I took a shower and went back to bed. Marie… she took a shower and sat in a corner sulking for the rest of the night. Found her in a heap from there in the morning, little speckle of drool under her cheek, all curled up like a fucking kitten. And I fucking kicked her. Just thought I’d be careful in case that nutjob from last night woke up. It wasn’t really a kick. More like a nudge. She woke up alright. And has been bawling her eyes out for three fucking hours already because Bobby-fucking-Iceprick-fucking-Drake broke up with her. Two more hours and we’re at Nadine’s, but if she doesn’t stop that screaming and sniffling she won’t make it to there. I’ll fucking dump her ass to the curb.
“Marie.”
“…What?”
“’This may be a wrong moment. I may be an insensitive bastard. But do you think you could stop your bawling already? It’s giving me a headache.”
“Even you don’t like me anymore!”
Shit. I need a drink. I need a fucking lobotomy. We both could use some inventive brain surgery.
“Come on, kid. You’ll be better off without Iceprick anyway.”
“Yeah, right!“
“What ever. Just try to suck it up, okay? I don’t get headaches for nothing, and there’s not fucking enough painkillers in this world to ease me if…”
“Well, excuse me! Wouldn’t want to bother you with my worries!”
“Just shut up already. Bobby’s an ass. We’re going to start fu… Erm. Just keep your mouth shut, okay?”
“We are going to start what?”
“Having some fun? As soon as you stop crying we can have some fun?”
“Fine. Be an ass. I don’t care…”
It would be so fucking easy just grab her, snap her neck and dump her out. Wouldn’t even have to stop for that. There’s this long, straight stretch of road coming, just after the next curve and small uphill… She’s stopped wearing scarves, but drain is slow. I wouldn’t probably even notice it. Could steer with my thighs. Lean over, grab her chin and forehead. Quick yank, kick the door open and drop her out. No more whining. No more waking in the middle of the night when she crawls in to bed with me. No more this ‘good uncle-Logan’ bullshit. No more this fucking headache. Just the road. Me. Anna. Could tell her that Marie went nuts and run away. Yeah. That could work. Maybe then I could actually find somebody new in to my life. Somebody who would be able to carry on full conversations without flipping through dozen personalities during each sentence. Somebody who I could fuck without having to be afraid of heart attack…
“Logan?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m sorry. I… I don’t mean to be such a bitch.”
“Hmph.”
“It’s just so easy to let go of everything when I’m with you. I feel like… Like I can trust you. No matter what, I can trust you.”
On the other hand, it’s only hour and a half left. Hour and a half, and I can get some beer. Get in to the cage and crack some skulls. Get Anna and introduce her to Marie again. They’ll be sitting in the back, chatting about what chicks of their age chat about, not bothering me.
And Marie… When she looks at me like that… Oh, hell. She really believes it when she says that she can trust me. How the fuck can I not love her when she goes and does something like that? Fucking impossible.
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