Logan: Scooter, stop pressing. You’re taking all the juice out.
Scott: Excuse me Mr. Barbeque, but it’s *my* grill and I’ll cook on it *my* way.
Logan: Whatever, but when nobody wants to eat your flat-ass, dry, burgers, don’t try an’ pawn em’ off on Laughlin cuz he only eats what I make em’… ain’t that right? *scratches dog between the ears*
Laughlin: Woof!
Jean: Honey, did you remember to put the marinade on?
Scott: …
Jean: Scott?
Scott: No… I forgot. Can’t I do it now?
Jean: It’s too late, it won’t have a chance to soak in.
Marie: Geez Scott, forgetting the marinade… I’m disappointed in you.
Scott: Is it really that big a deal?
Logan, Marie and Jean: …
Marie: Uh… yeah.
Logan: Stand back One-Eye.
Scott: What are you doing?
Logan: What the Hell does it look like? Saving your ass from having to hit the Burger World drive-thru like last year.
Marie: Oh Logan, my hero.
Logan: You sassin’ me?
Marie: Maybe.
Logan: Do it again and I’ll hafta’ spank that cute little ass of yours with this spatula.
Marie: That a promise?
Logan: Grrr…
Scott: Get away from my grill before you fry your hard-on.
Logan: Fuck off X-boy, I‘m multi-tasking. *kisses Marie while blindly reaching for a new tray of ground beef*
1 Hour Later
Marie: Time to eat!
Jubilee: Finally! Any longer and I mighta’ taken a bite outta’ Remy.
Remy: Anytime chere. *wink*
Scott: I gotta’ hand it to you Logan, you really came through. Guess you’ll be manning the grill from now on. *hands over an apron and chef hat*
Logan: Yeah, I’ll take over, but I ain’t wearing that pansy-ass get-up.
Scott: Why do you always do this? Every time I try to share a moment with you, out comes the bad-ass façade.
Logan: It’s not a... fa-sod or whatever the Hell you said, I’m just not gonna-
Jean: Scott, your burger is getting cold and Logan… well, yours may stop moo-ing at anytime, so I suggest that both of you just shut up and eat.
Scott and Logan: …
Marie: Holy shit Jean, I think it worked!
Scott: *clearing his throat* Logan, can you please pass me the mayo?
Logan: Mayo? What kind of pansy-ass shit is that?
Scott: Listen you metal-brained, overgrown, combat piñata, if you don’t hand it over I’m gonna laser your ass straight into the ground.
Laughlin: Grrr…
Marie: It was too good to be true.
Jean: You said it.
20 Minutes Later
Scott: Logan! Stop with the fireworks already, that one burned my shirt!
Logan: Come on Scooter, you been with Jeannie for a good 10 years and you're still scared of a little burn?