'Oh how the world spins,
In one moment we are undone,
All our sins are made flesh,
And within the gaze of angels are we judged.'
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Her steps were even by the time she'd gotten to the dining room, the entire school was beginning to gather for food. There were a few exceptions, Jean and Kitty for one, but the rest of the school were going along their usual route to food.
As she passed the rec room she caught sight of Logan, his back to her, bent repairing the damage he'd wrought. Leaving the flow of children she went over to him, her bare fingers twitching as she touched the back of his shoulder.
"Logan?" When he turned to look at her she thought she'd go blind from the amount of care he was showing her in his gaze. Watching his throat constrict as he swallowed, the way his skin rippled as it went down. Her eyes taking in everything he was, everything he *could* be to her and in that moment she knew her choice had been the right one.
Standing up he let her move back a little, out of range of her skin giving her a little space that he knew she needed. He didn't speak to her, he didn't have to, she knew what he'd say and she filled in her part of the conversation.
"Ah went to see Scott, Ah know he what he said to ya, an' he was wrong to say it. It's *mah* choice, always has been, Ah just had to remind him of that." Logan shifted his weight onto the other foot and readjusted the tool belt on his hip. Seeing his eyes question she answered him, "Ah know what he said to ya too, he was wrong an Ah know he threw the first knee too." Her eyes went to the few stragglers who were going toward the dining hall, meeting his gaze again she could see his confliction. He wanted her to be safe and secure but he also wanted her to be free, free to be herself.
"Ah'm just goin' to put a few things straight then Ah'll see ya in the garage. Mah bags'll be in the truck after Ah finish in the hall." Marie watched the glow in his gaze build, there was a promise in them, a hope, something she wanted to explore with him. It wasn't fully formed yet, probably wouldn't be for a while but that it *was* there was enough for her. That he valued her enough to allow her *in*, he was a closed man, not easily reached by anyone.
Yet she had, by her own touch, her own self had reached the heart of him and if she had to choose between the darkness of Logan and the light of Scott, she'd choose the comforting shade of Logan. Smiling and content she went off to give the rest of the school a 'heads-up' on what was about to happen, she didn't want anyone saying Logan had taken her away. She was going under her own steam and her own will, they'd either accept it or not. But it was no longer their choice where and who she saw.
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Logan watched her walk away from him, the movement of her written on his mind. She was fluid, solid, a woman in all sense of the word, time had changed her here. She was what she wanted to be, now it was time to move on, time to change things. She'd grown as much as she could here in the confines of the walls, it was time she met the world head on. Oh it wouldn't be easy for either of them, she still looked young, he was still old enough to be her father. Yet it was in her eyes that the difference was really marked, they were old, older than his own and that worried him. She needed to see the good that lay in the world, the love that it held out for her. Here she'd learn the darkness of it, the light that they held up to the world cast the rest of it in shadow. Here things were black and white, out in reality it was grey, she had too many memories of pain already. She needed good memories, good things to balance the pain and he could give them to her.
The weight of the tool belt on his hips made them feel heavy, loaded with anticipation. Undoing the strap he took it off, the feeling didn't ease though. It only centred it further, as his hearing picked up on the chatter of the dining room coming to a gentle halt. Picking up Marie's voice as it wove over the rest of the school, picking his way across the room wiping his hands on his jeans. Flicking his skin free of glass shards, his mind concentrating on what he was hearing, Marie speaking out for herself. A small smile on his lips as he wandered toward the large room.
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Jubilee was watching the doors, she'd seen everyone come in for lunch, everyone except Jean and Kitty. They must still be doing her lesson plans for the summer, Jubilee wondered just exactly why Kitty had to fill *every* single moment of the summer with something. What was it, some kind of Jewish thing? Thou shalt not goof off?
Anyway her attention was quickly dragged to the main doors when Rogue stepped through, she looked a little nervous. The Professor's eyes were dragged to Rogue immediately when she came through the doors, yet the silence that was between them wasn't real. By looking at them both she knew they were talking, but not by the usual human standards. It was the calm smile that was on Rogues face that was suddenly transferred to The Professors that made her wonder exactly what Rogue had been showing him. When the lunch crowd lulled a moment, The Professor held a hand up and the entire room went quiet, his rich voice sang out across the room.
"If I could have your attention for a moment, Rogue would like to speak to us all."
Then it was all on Rogue, Jubilee sent her strength through her thoughts, directing them at her and willing her to say what she'd been thinking. It was about time people got off their damn backsides and really saw what was goin' on between those two. Willing her on Jubilee smiled as her friend looked her way and relaxed a little. Settling back in her seat, Jubilee waited for the fireworks an this time they wouldn't have anything to do with her.
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God why had she thought this would be easy, when she'd seen Logan a moment ago it had seemed so easy. But when you were acting like a grown up that meant you had to do the hard things even when you felt like running away.
When The Professor had entered her mind to ask her what was wrong she'd just replayed the conversations with Scott and Logan. He'd understood, telling her that if she wanted to have a moment to tell everyone what had really happened then he'd give her it. When he'd quietened the entire room and every eye had turned toward her she felt as if she'd been under the worlds biggest microscope. Every single eye was on her waiting to hear what she had to say, it was only when she saw Jubes smiling and winking at her that her spine suddenly remembered what it was for.
Standing straight she began, "Ah know ya'll saw the fight this mornin', the one between Logan and Mr Summers. Ah just want to clear somethin' up before the rumour mill gets goin an makes this a whole bunch o' stuff that it ain't about." It was easier to move her gaze around the room, to scan the faces quickly then move onward.
"Ya see the thing is Logan didn't start the fight, Mr Summers did. He said somethin' that Logan didn't like, somethin' about me." Taking a deep breath Marie centered herself and began to tell the rest of the school what she'd worked out for herself.
"Ya see, Mr Summers thought that he could 'help' me, he thought he could make me choose a life that was 'better' for me. But by doin' that he was takin' mah choices away from me." Her eyes locked onto Ororo's and she could see the older woman willing her to finish to get the words out that had been crowding her heart. To spill them over the floor, to air them in the world where they could be judged by their own merit.
"But that's no way to live, not for me anyway. Mr Summers tol' Logan he had to stay away from me, not to be near me, to leave me *alone*." Her voice quavered here, a flash of pain that ripped through her making her shudder. Feeling weak until a solid warmth met her back and she turned to see Logan right behind her, holding her up, supporting her silently. It was enough to keep her together, his quiet form behind her, he wouldn't let her fall or let her stop until she was finished.
"But that's the thing, Logan's only ever been the one person who's never been afraid to touch me. Hell he's died for me once already an Ah'm not supposed to be thankful, not supposed to reach out an touch that one person?" Logan's hand touched her shoulder and she felt his warmth run through her skin, steeling her to finish.
"It's mah decision who Ah get close to, who Ah want to be close to, no one elses." Her eyes found no arguement in Ororo or The Professors gazes, but she did find resistance in Bobby's, she locked her gaze onto his and her voice became cold.
"Ah choose for mahself an Ah choose Logan." Bobby's eyes were flashing dangerously at her and Logan but the quiet strength behind her calmed her nerves.
"An before you think it was Logan who threw the first punch, ya'll should ask Mr Summers why he thought kneein' Logan in the crotch would be a good idea." She caught the wide eyed looks from all the kids and heard the mutters of 'fuckin insanity if you ask me' and 'what the hell was he thinking?'. Seeing that they had the truth Marie looked at Ororo and The Professor their faces were calm she had nothing to fear from them.
"One final thing, Ah'm goin' to be away for a while. Ah'll be back soon Ah promise," her gaze landing on The Professor and seeing him nod slightly. "There ain't nothin' or no-one who can tell me who to see and who not to see. Ah'm nearly nineteen now, old enough to drive, old enough to do a lot o' things," behind her she felt Logan tense a little at that but she swallowed her nerves and carried on. "Just think of it as me takin' mah summer early."
Giving a quick glance behind her she caught Logan looking at The Professor, catching the look between them she knew Logan was talking to him. The smile and nod that went out in public was enough to make Logan grunt in acknowledgement. There'd been something settled and she'd knwo about it soon enough but for now all she wanted was to get away.
"Ah'll see ya all later," with those words she let the hubbub of the dining room rise again. Turning away with Logan shielding her back she walked toward the garage, her mind in turmoil but her heart settled. Her choice was known and nothing would take it away from her now.
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Kitty and Jean walked into the dining room to see the entire place still buzzing with conversation, Kitty went straight over to Jubilee who was happily chatting to several other students. When Kitty joined them Jube's smile lit the air.
"She did it Kit-Kat! Snagged the Wolvester and drove out of here, all wrapped up in a speech you should've been here for." The infectious grin made the rest of the table smile, Kitty looked around the rest of the students and found the faculty table just as Jean's voice rang out across the room.
"She did *what*?" The Professor's mouth was moving but the noise of the other diners was making it hard to hear him but Jean didn't stay long in the room. Her face had a hardened quality to it that they'd seen on the track when she pushed them an extra half mile.
"Oop's! Looks like Fearless Leader is goin to go without for a while."
"Jubes! How can you say that?" Kitty looked at her friend who was shovelling pasta into her mouth. She answered with her mouth full.
"Easy chica, because when Fearless Leader spills his guts as to what he had planned for Rogue, our 'perfect' doc is gonna think he was lining her up for him." Kitty's eyes widened as she realised what Jubes was saying.
"You mean him and Rogue?"
"Uh-huh, or that's how it'll seem to her anyway. Seein' how she's been chasing after Logan....."
"Man this is going to be fun to watch, glad we're not going to be doing classes through this." Jubilee slapped her friend on the arm and held on to it.
"Yeah *I* am glad *I'm* not doing extra classes with 'Doc Perfection' like some people."
That's when it sank in and Kitty let her head drop into her hands.
"Oh God! What have I let myself in for?" Jubilee rubbed her friends shoulders.
"Never mind Kitty, you can always keep us updated on her moods. See what Summer School does for you? Told you you needed a break."
Kitty wondered if she could get out of the work she'd lined up for hereself, being around a cranky Jean didn't do much for her own mood. Although it might give her a chance to have a snoop around the mainframe.
Bringing her head up she looked at Jube's her face happily chewing her lunch. "She *SO* owes us. When's she getting back?"
"Sometime this year I think, but when she does I don't think she'll qualify anymore."
"What?"
"Untouched virgin? You know, the reason this whole thing got started in the first place?" Kitty nodded and found herself looking over in The Professor's direction, his grey eyed gaze locking onto Kitty's own and her mouth saying exaclty what was going through her mind.
"Makes you kind of wonder why he set the assignment in the first place doesn't it?"
Jubes stopped chewing and her face became serious as she too found The Professor looking at them both. The small smile that was on his lips was unlike any other smile they'd seen on him. Small, quirky almost as if he'd just been caught out about something. He moved his gaze and began talking to Ororo, the two girls just looked at each other. Both of them wondering and speaking at the same time, "He'd never."
"Nah that'd be..."
Both of them came to the same conclusion, it really didn't matter why, only the result had been the best one for all concerned. Their thoughts going out to a maiden who'd finally finished the battle, she'd chosen her King and she'd never be alone again. That was enough of a fairytale for anyone, even a mutant.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Marie tells everyone of her choice.