The roads had been clear for nearly three hundred miles now, not another vehicle had passed him. The road was just a dark strip against the white of the world bringing his thoughts back to a different place and a different him.
He'd come back to smiles and hugs all round, everyone had been glad to see him, even Scott. He'd been away for three years after Alkali, just travelling, just losing himself in the world. It was a postcard from Kurt that had reached him that had made him ache to see what had
become of everyone. Seeing Marie for one, he knew she was happy, he'd have heard otherwise, she wasn't one to sit still while she was upset. She'd been a member of the team by then, confident, self assured everything she'd needed to be, until he'd come back.
He hadn't noticed at first, she was herself as always just doing what she normally did, hanging around with her team-mates shopping usual stuff, that was until he'd walked in on the conversation between her and Jean. Well conversation wasn't in it, it was an argument plain and simple. He could remember the words even now.
"He doesn't want you Rogue, he came back for me." He could feel the air charging up as Marie answered her.
"Yeah well you didn't have him rolling round your head for nearly five years, sure you've got a nice ass and a great rack but if you ever thought it'd be more than a quick fuck your sadly mistaken sugar! You're a poisoned Chalice Jean ever since you came back you've been hitting on everything that goddamn moves, you talk about Jubilee
being irresponsible! Fuck at least she didn't fuck one of her pupils after class!" The sound of a something being thrown and shattering against the wall could be heard.
"You stupid little bitch, do you think he'll love you? Your skin is a prison don't you understand that yet? No one wants you Rogue, do you think someone like Logan would be happy with half a woman when he could have one he could touch? Taste? Fuck without a sheet between
you?" A pause as he heard the sob start and smelt fresh tears flowing. The next voice small and pain riddled.
"I hate you." He listened to the smug tone of Jean as she finished the job.
"Good, maybe then you'll keep away from what's mine. Logan came back for me not you and I'll be leaving with him when he goes again. Get used to being alone Rogue the only company you'll ever have is the voices in your head." He'd heard Marie leave then, not running just
walking away, her scent filled with pain and hurt.
He'd made no promises to Marie, he wasn't there to look after her he wasn't there to take her away with him and he didn't see her as a potential bed partner. She was Marie, the kid he cared for the one piece of life he could look at and say that life wasn't such a bastard. But now things had been complicated, she loved him, Marie
loved him and not in the brotherly type way. Jean had always fascinated him but then she was all woman and hearing her little tirade with Marie had shown her true colours. She was an abuser, someone he would have sought out before to help him feel as low as he could but not now. She was off the list, if she could fuck a kid she
wasn't someone he wanted to be with, she'd lost whatever attraction she'd had for him right then and there. Pushing away from his listening spot he went to find Scott.
He found him sat in the library, reading a text book on geology making notes for his classes. He sat down and looked at him writing, Scott was ignoring him until he spoke, "What happened to you two?"
Scott lifted his face and he could see for the first time that the three years he'd been gone had aged the young man more than he'd realised.
"What me and Jean?" He just nodded and Scott continued, "When she came back from the dead we were happy at first, that is until the Phoenix made herself known to everyone. She's not Jean anymore, she's
Phoenix and she just takes what she wants. I lived with it as long as I could but in the end I had to face the facts that she wasn't Jean. Jean died at Alkali Lake, what came back was a stranger who didn't love me, she wanted to experience everything and she did." The look
of pain that was etched in his face was something that Logan wished he'd never seen. His eyes never blinked when he heard the comment fall from Scott's lips. "You'd better watch your back Logan because you're the only thing she hasn't had yet and we all know how much it
took for Jean to choose between us. Now she doesn't have me, your next on the batters plate."
Hearing the cold words come from his lips the man who once loved her to the edge of devotion made his head spin.
"Just heard her arguing with Rogue about me," Scott didn't lift his head up just carried on reading as he answered.
"Really what did Rogue say?"
"That she hated her and Jean said she'd only have the voices in her own head for company from now on and that I'd never touch her."
Scott's head lifted up as he heard the words and colour drained from his face.
"Logan Phoenix is a strong telepath, she can control people through their minds, did Rogue run or walk away?"
"Walked why?" Scott was up and across the room in a heartbeat, Logan felt the spike in his stomach as he caught the comment from his lips.
"That fucking bitch!" turning to Logan as he ran toward the lift, shouting, "Get to her room, she's still in the same one, fuck if she's done what I think she has not even Xavier will defend her now."
Logan took the stairs two at a time, the scent of blood strong as he found the noise bringing him closer. A shrill cry hit his ears and he heard the sob of a girl, "Rogue, oh no Rogue not you please not you."
Barging into the room he found her two room-mates trying to staunch the open wounds that ran from her wrist to elbow, deep wounds, death wounds. Shoving them aside he pulled Marie out of their grip and kissed her, feeling the drain hit him immediately as her body fought to stay alive. The pain was incredible but he saw the flit of
something leave her mind, something red, something birdlike. Blackness was covering him but he'd saved her again, feeling the anger of what had happened to her fill him before he slipped away into blackness.
He came to in the medical bay, Marie was hovering over him, her eyes burning into his. He knew she was still buzzing with his gifts and could see her body twitching with it, reaching out for her the tears slid down her face as they touched skin. She couldn't hurt him for a
while and she slid into the warmth, "I love ya Logan, always have always will but I know you don't now so I'll not bother you with it anymore. Thank you for doing what you did, I never asked you to but thanks." He was picking up on her emotions, her scent that was hurt confused and angry he managed to speak to her before she left.
"I do love you kid just not the way you want me to. Your too important to me to mess things up by letting you see just how worthless I am, how wrong I am for you."
He knew she could sense the truth of his words, that he cared so much and needed to keep her as a pristine memory for a while. Her eyes glittered with tears as she spoke to him.
"Would you touch me Logan?" Knowing that he'd heard
everything, "Would I be enough?" Closing his eyes to the look of hope in her face he couldn't lie to her she'd smell it.
"I did didn't I?"
"That's not what I mean Logan and you know it."
"I know kid, you should know already." Smiling she saw his eyes meet hers and she knew she'd be enough for him, whether he could touch her skin or not. He loved her and that was all there was to it.
"I do Logan I just needed to hear it."
She left him them and he felt the cold loneliness grip his heart crushing the warmth he'd had when
she'd been there with him. Finding his thoughts turning to Jean, the one who'd caused all the problems in the first place, to Phoenix the walking sponge.
Hank had told him about the things she'd done as he recovered in the medical bay, the time she'd forced herself upon him, keeping his body wrapped up in her grip as she'd slowly explored his body. Her mind twisted and broken as he'd fought to get free, sensing the remnants
of Jean still underneath but knowing that they were lost to the force that was Phoenix. Even Xavier didn't challenge her behaviour anymore he just tried to keep the damage she did at a minimum. But now with his arrival things had stepped up a gear, it took him three hours to
recover but he was ready to leave again when he went to the garage.
Jean was waiting her bags already packed and loaded, wearing a pair of leather jeans and red shirt she looked amazing and he fought the urge to just fuck her where she stood. Hearing her voice echo through his mind, `Done that already, why not be more inventive?' her smile
meeting the dark hazel of his gaze, he just opened the door to the truck and she walked round to get in. He didn't need to look back to see that Marie was watching him, knew how much she was hurting because he could feel it. It took all his strength not to turn round and go back but Jean was his now and he'd take care of her.
She lasted until they'd gotten out of Salem Centre before she jumped him, her hands were all over his body, exploring, touching, tasting.
She even went inside his mind and found his cache of dreams about her, flicking through them as he concentrated on the road. Taking hold of one vision she just smiled and settled her head in his lap, showing him the delights of her mouth as he drove. He didn't last
long but then she wasn't interested in time, only quantity, she'd waited until he'd had the time to recover and had given him head for nearly fifty miles. Never allowing his release until she was ready for him, until he felt as if his body would burst from the strain.
He'd grabbed her hair at one point and had thrusted hard into her mouth as he came deep into her throat. Feeling her hands grip him tight as she struggled for breath, knowing that she enjoyed being played roughly that she expected this of him. "Swallow, swallow it! Clean me off good and I'll fuck you sore tonight when we stop." He'd
let her go and she'd purred as she worked him, licking him clean, feeling himself harden again as he watched her. They stopped for nothing and he made good time crossing over into Canada as night fell, pulling over he got a motel room and Jean just swanned into the room as if she owned it. She didn't waste time, stripping off her
clothes she stood naked in front of him her fingers already diving inside her body knowing it turned him on to see her pleasure herself. "Ready to keep your promise Logan?"
Shutting down his conscious mind he just let instinct take over, grabbing her roughly he pulled her against his body so she could feel his hardness against her. Throwing her on the bed he tore at his clothes shedding them
quickly not even removing his boots before he was plunging deep inside her, already lost to the rhythm of his body. Her lithe form wrapping around him as her mind wrapped around his, freeing all the blocks he'd had in place flooding his mind with everything. Freeing the past he'd been searching for, freeing all the rage pain and
hatred he'd ever felt, the deaths of innocents, the missions he'd been on, the wars he'd fought in, the people he'd lost. She freed him, all of him and Wolverine rode the wave of it all, snarling into her as he fucked her harder.
Her mind lost in the bliss of her orgasm as it ripped through her, not understanding what she'd done, what
she'd released. She didn't feel the blades slide into her body until they met her spine severing it through, the blood flowing out of her so quickly that she didn't feel the pain as he pumped his last into her dying body. Seeing her eyes finally realise the mistake she'd made as her innards pooled around the bed. "Enjoy the fuck? I did!"
Sliding out of her body he left her to bleed to death on the bed, her mind too weak to do anything, he watched with cold detachment as she died again. He didn't feel anything for her, The Wolverine too angry at her to care that she'd tried to kill the one pure thing he had
left in the world. Listening to her last breath seeing Jean finally look at him, her blood covering him, "I'm sorry, tell them please."
He just grunted as she died, turning to the shower he left her body to cool in the room.
Hours later he'd cleaned everything, picked up her wrapped body and dumped it in the truck, it'd take a long ride to get there, it was the one place she deserved to be.
Going down the dark road he made out the edge of the road and saw the large expanse of water ahead. The dam had made a new lake and he was going to leave her where she'd died the first time, where she belonged. It didn't take long to carry her to the edge, opening up the bundle he could see her flesh trying to reknit itself together.
Time to change tactics.
The pyre burnt well and he didn't shed a tear as he sliced her body up into pieces, he'd done worse in his time at least here he was trying to help out and stop the pain she'd been causing. The ashes were scooped up and dropped in the lake, leaving nothing but a warm patch of ground. Leaving the lake behind he went back to the truck
and got back behind the wheel. Turning south he made his way back to the life he preferred to remember, the one he'd had before Phoenix had opened his head for him.
Three weeks later he phoned Xavier, listening to the calm voice answer the phone, he almost put it down but something told him to speak. "It's me Xavier, she's free."
The silence on the other end of the line was almost a relief, the tone measured and soft, understanding almost.
"Are you coming home? We've missed you." He could hear the track of the tears from his end of the line.
"I'm not safe to be around Xavier, Phoenix opened my head up. I know who I am now, what I am."
"No Logan, that's what you were, not who you are but if you want to spend more time away it's your decision but talk to Marie first."
He heard the phone being handed to someone and her soft tones reached out to him, soothing the pain he hadn't realised he had inside.
"Logan, come home. I love you."
The phone was still connected when he left it hanging there in the cold, turning the truck homeward, sending a thought out to Xavier, one he knew he'd be able to hear.
"I'm coming home, make sure she knows who I'm coming for." Feeling the sensitive brush of his mind as he moved out of the bleak landscape, back toward home and a woman who loved him no matter what he'd been or who he was. Feeling clean, settled and sure for the first time in his life.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
This little piece of darkness I still love to read myself when I want to refresh my *Dark* Logan side, he's nasty, cruel and just a little psychotic but hey thats why we love him right?