Title: Control 11/12
Author: sharonmjl47
Rating: NC-17
Category: Movieverse.
Disclaimer: I own nothing, and no one. Sad, isn’t it!
Feedback: Please, bad or good. If no one tells me it’s bad, I won’t know!
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Nearly three weeks later, they were still more or less at the same point. Xavier helped Marie with meditations and breathing exercises, getting her to concentrate her mind on Carol’s mutation as well as her own. She could switch Carol’s on and off without too much trouble, but she was still having problems with her own. Once she managed to get it on for about a minute, but it had gone off, the switch out of her reach once again.
She was the first to admit that she hadn’t really dealt with the basic violation Carol had inflicted on her. She felt a little stressed about it, but the meditation sessions were helping. It wasn’t something that she felt she could share with Logan, because he was so intertwined in the 'Carol' experience. So she kept it to herself.
She and Logan were faring a little better. They were still sharing a room, sharing a bed. They had kissed and touched one another, but never taken it further, both frightened that the sex would cloud the growing trust between them. He had been a gentleman and never made any kind of move.
Each night they got ready for bed, he wearing boxers or loose sweat pants and she in little shorts and tank tops. But it wasn’t easy. From the moment that they got back to her room and started winding down for bed, the anticipation started to build, and by the time they had got into bed, they were both stinking of arousal and struggling to rein it in.
She would pretend to be removing her make-up or brushing her hair while she watched him take his clothes off in her mirror. He knew she watched. When it was her turn to undress, he busied himself with shaving or cleaning his teeth, but she always joined him in the bathroom and stepped naked into the shower with him still in the room. Countless times, had he cut himself as he watched her in the mirror casually drop her towel on the floor and reveal miles of perfectly toned skin and get under the hot spray.
It was exactly what he had just watched her do. She had walked in to the bathroom as usual, given his boxer-clad body the once-over, flashed him a sinful smile, and closed the shower door behind her. He continued to draw the razor down his face. He was looking into the mirror, but not at his face or the razor. He watched her. He could make out her pale outline in the frosted glass as she washed herself. Another pale movement. The shower door opened, and she poked her wet head out. He quickly went back to shaving himself.
“You ok, Logan?”
“Yep.”
“You, uh, got shaving foam all over yourself.”
He froze and raised an eyebrow at her in the mirror. “Kinda the point when shaving, darlin’.”
“You, um, want to come in here so I can wash it off for ya?”
She caught her bottom lip in between her teeth, and a mischievous twinkle was in her eye. “Sure, why not? Make some room.” She disappeared back inside the shower as he rinsed his razor and followed her in, purposely leaving his underwear on.
He swallowed hard as he closed the door. He was close, close to her, and she was naked, her back to him as she rinsed her face under the spray. He touched her shoulder, and she turned around slowly. He wanted to touch her, God he wanted to so much, but all this had to be at her pace. Him jumping in and not consulting her about things had been his downfall before. He wouldn’t risk it this time.
She adjusted the showerhead so that the water fell over both of them. Then she used both hands to gently rinse off the foam from his jaw and upper lip. He didn’t know what to do with his hands so he kept them by his sides. She bit her lip again, and his eyes caught the action, then swept down quickly and back to her lips.
The brief look at her chest had his groin stirring even more than it already had. She brushed his lips with her hands and then let them trail gently down his shoulders and onto his stomach. He lowered his forehead to hers. She couldn’t resist the closeness of him and reached up to kiss his lips.
The minute their lips met, his hands were no longer dormant by his sides and he simply had to feel her skin under his hands. They crept down her arms to her waist and then onto her bottom, revelling in the softness of her. He gripped her and pulled her against him as she slipped her tongue into his mouth. As the kiss grew in boldness and heat, she felt the shower wall against her back, and he felt one of her hands snake into the front of his boxers.
Kissing each other feverishly as they let their want, need, and desire get the better of them. She didn’t let him stop the kissing - only for brief moments to catch their breath. She didn’t want to say the wrong thing, remind him of Carol and ruin the moment, so she kept kissing now realising how much she had missed the feel of him against her and the closeness they shared as well as the love. Even though she didn’t know it, he was doing the same, happy to keep kissing, to say nothing, happy to let her set the pace.
He kept his touches on her light, his grip gentle, and he kept his restraint. He didn’t bite her, he didn’t scratch her, but he couldn’t stop the odd growl escaped him. He knew that those things, the biting and scratching would not be part of every lovemaking, but he had waited so long the desire to mark her was enormous. He held back and let her control the moment so that he could control himself.
He kissed all the way down her body until he got to her triangle of light brown curls. Raising her leg to his shoulder, he began to kiss and nip and lick at her clitoris adoring the smell and taste of her. Soon she was moving her hips in time with his efforts and gasping and moaning uncontrollably until she cried his name and came in his mouth.
Logan stood up and kissed her as she pushed his boxers down his legs, and he wasted no time in kicking them away before raising her thigh and nudging his cock against her entrance. She pulled his hair and kissed him hard, and he sunk into her slowly, inch by inch. She bit his lip, making him jump. She was trying to push him. She knew he was holding back and she didn’t want him too. Even though she knew she had him, knew he loved her as much as she loved him, she wanted all of him. Once he was all the way in, he hoisted her up against him, and her legs instantly went around his waist. Mere seconds later, they were both coming breathlessly against each other.
He pulled away from her, panting, and then kissed her chastely on the forehead. She huffed, suddenly feeling frustrated, and pushed past him out of the shower. “Marie?” She grabbed a large towel and walked back into the bedroom as she wrapped it around herself. Logan rinsed himself quickly under the spray and followed her, wrapping his own smaller towel around his waist.
“Marie, what’s wrong?”
She gave a short, bitter laugh. “Nothing. Everything is *just* fine.”
Picking up her brush, she began to rake it through her hair, but it clattered to the floor when Logan pulled her arm round to face him. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
She pulled away from him. “This…” She picked up her brush and threw it on her vanity. It knocked over a couple of bits of her make-up, but she ignored it. “This whole thing is exactly what I didn’t want!”
He shook his head. “You invited me in the shower Marie…”
Her frustration with the whole situation flared at him again. “Exactly! I invited *you* in. I knew this would happen, Logan, I knew it! I knew you would hold back.”
“I’m trying, ok? I’m trying to get past this.”
“Get past what?”
“The fact that every time I looked at that bitch, I saw you, wanted you to be there, to be safe, and now every fucking time I look at you, I see her! I keep waiting for you to turn on me and taunt me with a body that isn’t fucking yours!” He sat down on the bed. “I just want all this to go away.”
She watched him sigh and then sighed herself. “Well, it won’t go away, and quite frankly, I’m fed up with trying to make it go away. For God’s sake, let’s just get on with life, shall we? This is getting fucking ridiculous. You didn’t mean it. You’re not going to do it again, so let’s just get over it. And anyway, it’s not fair to lay everything at your door. You didn’t start this. I’m doing it, too. I’m frightened I’m going to say something or do something to remind you of Carol, and you know there are going to be moments like that, but we’re just gonna have to deal with it. I’m sorry for getting angry and ruining something that was good, and it was good, Logan, but it’s not enough, and you know it. I can’t - I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep going on thinking that everything will be ok, them something happens, and we’re back to fucking square one.” She knew that she was overreacting a little, maybe being a bit of a control freak, but she couldn’t help. Carol had taken away her basic right to control herself and now she was gone, Marie wanted to act on her own.
She had been pulling out clothes and shoving them on while she talked. Now she stood in front of him in her jeans and bra. As she put her t-shirt over her head Carol’s words from her dream came back to her. ~You need to get this out of your system.~ Logan’s voice brought her back to her senses, but she didn’t hear what he said.
“What?”
“I said I was sorry.”
She harrumphed and shoved her feet in to her flat ballet-style shoes. “For fuck’s sake, will you grow a pair, and stop fucking apologising!”
After she slammed the door behind her, Logan grabbed the bedside lamp and hurled it at the wall shattering it completely. Small shards of cream-coloured ceramic flew around the room and settled like heavy snow on the floor and other surfaces. He stood there in the mess, his chest heaving and his emotions running wild.
*********
It took him nearly an hour to clear up the room. In the end, he had given up with a dustpan and brush and taken the vacuum from the cleaning cupboard downstairs and sorted out the room. He made the bed, opened the window, and as he did, he saw her seated on the edge of the huge fountain, the moonlight reflecting on the streaks in her hair.
As he got dressed, he heard the phone ring in the main hall. He ignored it. He had never answered it, and he wasn’t about to now. Before he left the room, he checked out the window; she was still there, sitting in the silent dark and steaming angry. When he got to the hall, Scott was just hanging up the phone.
“Logan, I have to wake up the Professor. One of our informants has given us a location on Magneto, but he’s moving again, so we need to move fast. Small team: me, you, ‘Ro, and Remy only.”
“Ok, I’ll wake ‘Ro and Gambit.” Scott headed off up the stairs. Logan hesitated briefly looking out to the gardens. Should he tell her or keep her safe out of the way? “No, she’ll kill me!”
He ran out into the garden. She didn’t turn to acknowledge him, but he could tell by the way that she tensed that she knew he was there. “Marie, we got a location on Magneto. Scott’s gone to wake the Xavier.” He turned around and ran back into the mansion, Marie right behind him.
Ten minutes and a quick briefing later, they hurried into their suits. Logan, Scott, and Remy were the first out of the men’s locker room, closely flowed by ‘Ro out of the women’s. When Marie followed her, fully suited up and scraping her hair back, Logan went nuts.
“No, no way are you going anywhere!” Scott was nodding his agreement.
Before Marie could speak, the Professor did. “I want Rogue to go. She will hopefully provide an element of surprise. Magneto must have figured out by now that his plan failed, but I doubt he is expecting to see Rogue.” He looked straight at her. “Use it to your advantage, where possible.” She nodded, and they all walked through the hangar door to the Blackbird.
As the jet rose through the basketball court, Marie fidgeted with her gloves, unsure why she had even bothered putting them on. Her mutation was dormant, and as far as she was concerned, useless. She glanced at the seat next to her and watched Logan flex his fingers in his own gloves. Then he let his claws out and then back in again.
He met her eyes. “You still pissed at me?”
“Yes, Logan. I am so still pissed at you. I’m pissed at Carol, Magneto, the whole fucking world, and its mother!”
He smirked at her. “Just so I know.” He didn’t really have to ask; he could smell the tension and anger in her.
Another ten minutes, and Scott gently set the jet down on a helicopter pad on the top of an old building. They stepped out and headed silently down the side of the building, then in the direction of what looked like an abandoned steel works. It had metal chutes, pipes, and open metal stairs all over the place.
They had worked out a plan to split into two groups: Storm and Remy, and Rogue, Logan, and Scott in the other. Logan, Rogue and Scott scaled the side of the building and looked in through the skylights to see inside. Storm and Remy scouted around the bottom.
Through the top skylight, Scott pointed out Magneto and Pyro to Logan. They were seated at a huge desk looking over some maps and plans. They could also see Mystique sitting behind some computer screens with another mutant that neither of them recognised. Rogue was over the other side of the roof and beckoned them silently to her. She pointed to one other mutant that Scott and Logan didn’t know. She said his name was Spike and that Carol knew him. She told them that he threw some kind of spikes from the insides of his forearms at incredible speed.
From Rogue’s vantage point, they were behind Mystique. The computer screen she was looking at were CCTV monitors, and when they saw Storm and Remy cross the screen by the side of the building, Rogue gasped, and Logan swore quietly. Their cover and element of surprise was blown.
Mystique immediately raised the alarm, and Spike and Pyro ran out of the building to fight Storm and Remy. Scott, Logan, and Rogue leaned over the side of the building to see lighting crack, speeding spikes, flames and flaming cards fly.
“Scott, you go down and help them. We’ll deal with Magneto and that blue bitch!”
“Ok, be careful Logan. Magneto can tie you in knots, literally!”
All Scott got as a response was a curt nod. Scott took off over the side of the building, and Logan and Rogue ran to the furthest skylight. “I’ll take blue. You take care of bucket head.”
“Ok.” She got ready to jump down with Logan. He opened the skylight, looked at her, and paused briefly, noticing she was letting Carol’s powers into her, her eyes were slowly turning blue as she let the superhuman strength course through her body.
He ignored it. “On three… one… two… go!”
They jumped together. Logan landed in front of Mystique and tried to get the first punch in, but she was too fast for him and kicked his legs out from under him. Once he regained his footing, he flew at her, claws out and a snarl on his lips. She turned away from him and dodged his claws easily. Then, grabbing the computer screen, she smashed it over his head with an evil smile.
Rogue ran at Magneto. He levitated a metal filing cabinet and launched it at her. She wasn’t quick enough to dodge it, but laughed when it quite literally bounced off of her. “You’re gonna have to try harder than that, old man!”
And he did. A barrage of metal objects, different sizes and weights, flew at her from every direction. Some hit her, some missed. Others she punched out of the way. She was enjoying using the strength, showing him that instead of hurting her and ruining her, he had in fact given her something better. “You know what they say, Erik. What doesn’t kill ya!”
The last thing that came flying at her was a long metal bar. She caught it, spun round on the spot, and threw it back with everything she had. Magneto didn’t have time to get out of the way, and it hit him across the chest and face. He flew backwards with the force of the blow, and he hit the wall behind him before sliding to the floor unconscious, possibly dead. Marie hesitated knowing she should check if he was alive or not, but she simply didn’t care anymore as long as he was out of her life.
She turned away from Magneto just in time to see Logan pull both sets of claws free from Mystique chest. She dropped like a stone to the floor, an expression of death on her face.
He stepped back and frowned at her. “You ok?”
She smiled. “Perfect ten, sugar!”
His gaze swept over her, and he chuckled. “Yeah, you are.”
She sighed and rolled her eyes at him. “Not now. Let’s help the others.”
When they broke out of the back door and into the loading area behind, all hell had broken loose. Storm was unconscious, Scott and Remy had dragged her behind a large dumpster, and Pyro and Spike had them all pinned with flying spikes and flames. The force of the flames was pushing the dumpster back and squashing them against the wall.
Logan charged at Spike, his claws drawn and swiping away each projectile as it came towards him. Marie turned and ran back into the building. She jumped over Mystique’s dead body to the other side of the room and grabbed a fire extinguisher. “Oh well, if it doesn’t work, at least I can hit him with it!”
She ran back out to the fight. She fumbled with the control of it. Once she ripped the pin out, she pointed it at Pyro and squeezed the handle. It made a strange noise, like a kid blowing raspberry, and did nothing but dribble. She rolled her eyes. “Plan B!” She snuck up behind him. “JOHN!” He turned, surprised by someone using his given name, and she swung the extinguisher. It hit him under the chin, sending him sailing backwards and through the window of an adjacent building.
Logan had managed to knock out Spike and was attempting to move the dumpster away from a trapped Remy, Scott, and Storm. Rogue dropped the fire extinguisher and concentrated, closing her eyes. Then she let Carol’s mutation fade away as she steadied her breathing the way Xavier had been trying to teach her over the last few weeks.
When she opened her brown eyes with a triumphant smile, she saw Spike get to his knees and produce three projectiles from his arms. Logan had pulled the dumpster away, and Scott came out first as Remy helped a now-conscious Storm. Marie knew that Logan hadn’t seen Spike. He took aim.
“LOGAN!” She closed the space between Spike and Logan. Logan turned as she plastered herself to his front, wrapping her arms round his neck. Her body jolted against him as the three spikes hit her across her back, the last one piercing the area around her heart.
Out of the corner of his eyes, Logan saw the red beam of Scott’s visor take Spike’s head off, but he didn’t care. Marie was weak in his arms, and they dropped to their knees as he held her. “NO! Marie… please!” Her eyes shone with pain, her mouth open in a constant gasp, and her breaths were coming in short bursts. Her warm blood trickled over his gloved hands as he held her up.
Scott shouted to Storm to fly to the Blackbird, get the first aid kit, and radio home to get ready for a casualty. Logan heard all of this but didn’t register anything but Marie’s slowing heartbeat.
“Marie, come on… just stay awake. Stay with me Marie!” Tears started to form in his eyes and then slipped down his face as her heartbeat weakened even more. “Turn your skin on…” He couldn’t help but shake her slightly. “Come on Marie!” She continued to gasp for breath as she raised her hand and touched his face where his tears made lines downs his cheeks. “Marie, please! Turn your skin on, turn it on, come on, God damn it, turn it on!”
He ripped a glove off with his teeth and held it to her face. Some of her blood from his glove was on his hand, and it smeared over her cheek. He wanted to gag at the smell of her blood and the increasing smell of death. “Don’t you die on me. Don’t you dare fucking die on me, Marie! Turn it the fuck on!”
She choked and gasped. “C…can..t. find… switc…”
He shook her again. “Find it, please just find it! Please, Marie, please, please…”
A serene smile crossed her paling lips. “Love…y…” Her eyes became dull as her life slipped away. Her heart gave a last weak beat, and her hand fell limply away from his face.
He stared into her vacant face, her eyes looking through him at nothing and her heart no longer beating. Then he shook her slightly, his voice weak when he spoke. “Marie? Ma…ree?” He kissed her lips, her cheeks and her eyes as he sobbed and held her to him fiercely. “Marie… Marie… Please not her, anyone but her! Not Marie, not her, please not her!” His sobs grew. “No, no, no, no, NOOOOOOO!”
Scott backed up against the side of the building, slid to the floor, and hung his head in his hands. Remy kicked the dumpster as hard as he could, then rested his head against it, unable to look at Logan and the girl in his arms.
Storm ran up the ramp into the Blackbird and just as her hand had closed around the radio, she heard Logan scream ‘No’. It slipped from her hand as she realised that once again, she had lost a treasured friend.
*****************END OF PART ELEVEN
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Summary: “Well, it won’t go away, and quite frankly, I’m fed up with trying to make it go away…”