IX. Sunrises and Hope
Logan looked over at the horizon just as it exploded in fiery pinks and purples. He had traveled to many places and seen many things, but the sunsets and sunrises on the island were amazing. Nothing about life ever prepared him to think that he would ever be this happy and looking down at Marie stretched out in front of him, slowly running circles into his thigh, he realized how lucky he had been. At some point they had stopped looking at the horizon for big white sails. They only looked for sunsets, which were Marie's favorites and staying up exceptionally late today, a sunrise as well.
The balmy air all around them lighting slowly, Logan bent down and brought her free hand up to his lips. It seemed an eternity since she had been in white gloves all day, yet it had only been three weeks. Giving it a soft kiss, he circled it with his own and flexed the toes he had in the sand.
"Marie darling, you still awake?"
"Mmm-hmmm."
He shifted a little, making her turn and look up at his face, cheek pressed against his chest. He smiled at how beautiful she looked when she was half-asleep. Eyelids heavy and with a lazy smile, she squeezed the hand that held hers.
"You ready to go back now?"
She gave the horizon one last look. It was breathtaking.
"Yes."
Stepping back slightly, Logan stood to his feet, careful not to throw sand on her. Giving her extended hand a slow pull, he brought Marie to her feet as well. She swayed a little and steadying her with a hand at her waist, he pulled her in close.
"Are you okay?"
Marie closed her eyes to steady her sudden dizziness with a hand to her head. She had been feeling sick the last few days but had failed to mention it to Logan. He would only worry. Smiling up hazily, she shook her head yes and gave him a peck on the chin. Logan smiled at her gesture and knowing she was tired from staying up all night, clutched the hand he was still holding a little tighter.
"We should go then."
Marie pulled back and Logan grabbed the velvet blanket they had been laying on up under his arm. Giving Marie one last evaluating look, he wrapped his arm around her waist and started walking back towards the eastside of the beach. Home, he thought to himself. And that made him smile again. Home was a couple of trunks, a fire and a thatched hut. It seemed ironic, not because he was ever used to having much, everything a sailor owned had to fit in a knapsack, but because he had never really had a home, a place to call his. Only he had one now and that was so strangely satisfying. Of course that was in no small part due to Marie.
He looked over at her soft shuffling next to him. She had taken to wearing nothing but her little lacy bottoms the last few weeks and that left so much of her flawless and remarkably only slightly darker skin exposed. Nothing was more beautiful than watching her long wavy brown hair sway to cover and uncover her breasts in the warm tropical breeze all day long. She sensed his staring and looked up, blushing a little with her smile. He returned the smile and looked towards their home not too far off. They had certainly come a long way since she refused to even show her ankles, but the coy shyness was still there. But he didn't care. It was in her true character and not what they had made her and that was fine by him.
Still walking quietly, Logan's thoughts were interrupted by her sudden pause. He spotted it before she could point. Bending over he collected the beautiful shell that lay partially buried by his feet and handed it to her. She took it quietly and they resumed their walking. She planted a hand inside the waist of the short loincloth he had traded his pants for about two weeks ago also. She had been collecting shells for all kinds of purposes. Some wide shallow ones with mother of pearl coated interiors served as plates. Some deeper curved ones served to drink water. Pretty and colorful ones, like the one they just found, were to hold her assortment of plant extracts, seeds and grounded things. At first Logan was skeptical, but his Marie had proven quite the botanist. Some of her mixtures were for washing, some were seasonings, some were for scenting water for washing her hair. Those were his favorites.
Almost at the camp, Logan did a quick survey of the sand surrounding it. They had spent the night making love on the beach away from camp, but the past few days there had been tracks by the perimeter. He had taken to going out to purposefully hunt the boar almost every other day and had succeeded in catching some, but the nest remained hidden and he consistently saw a set of tracks that were larger and heavier than the others every few days. It troubled him deeply to know that the boar were still around on the relatively small island, but there was nothing today, and leaping over the two foot wide span of shell debris to enter the camp, he let the thought ease away with a brief touch to the knife at his side.
Marie noticed the gesture and tightened her grip on his hand before leaping over the perimeter. The day was as bright as ever by now, and she yawned widely into her hand as Logan settled her on the rum trunk and went around to get her some breakfast. Raven saw his master and immediately flew down from his perch to waddle clumsily on the trunk's leather finish. Marie lightened up considerably and pet the red feathers on his head.
"Hey Raven, did you miss me? Did you?"
The bird cawed several loud and broken `yes' and Logan rolled his eyes. So the damned bird was up to three words. That wasn't exactly talking. Taking out a plum, he bit at it and offered one to Marie.
"Want one?"
Marie held her stomach and shook her head vehemently.
"No, no. Just water."
Logan frowned and went to get her a drink from an empty rum bottle. He watched her add her new shell to the interior of the Jean trunk with her other little things while talking to Raven. She had been eating little lately and that worried him. He brought her the water just as she straightened out. She drank a sip and clutched her stomach again.
"What's wrong, Marie?"
She smiled weakly and made her way to Raven's perch. Placing the bird on it with a scratch to the chin, she ambled over to the shelter.
"Nothing Logan, I'm just tired."
She added a yawn to prove it. Logan washed his hands and grabbed a washcloth. Settling in next to her on the mat, he pulled her face to face with him. She immediately snuggled in close and threaded her hand in his hair, but Logan saw pain in her eyes. He knew enough to know she was lying.
"How long you been sick, Marie?"
She closed her eyes and sighed deeply. She had wanted to avoid this conversation but the voice of Ms. Witherstone in her head echoed to her that procrastination never worked.
"It's just a stomachache. Maybe it was the fish or the heat. It's been unbearable lately."
Logan mulled over her words with a twitching jaw. Yes, it could have been the heat, but it could be something else as well.
"What if you're pregnant?"
Marie squeezed her eyes tighter and stopped fiddling with his hair. Logan's heart dropped at her reaction. They had been careful lately for obvious reasons, but the look on her face fueled his lingering insecurity.
"We've been careful Logan, you pull out."
He clenched his jaw slightly.
"Not at first."
She gave him a pained look. The tears were close and he whispered what they both couldn't deny.
"Not the first few times."
Marie's lower lip quivered slightly. Logan sat up with his knees drawn to look at her.
"I thought you wanted children."
Marie wiped at her face.
"Yes I do Logan, but here?"
She sat up now too, hair swishing down over her chest.
"Here on this damned island?"
Logan sucked in his breath. He had never heard her curse before.
"We're doing good, we won't be here forever. Your father will…"
"My father?"
Marie stared at him plaintively.
"It's been almost a month, my father might even be dead."
Her words were a hoarse whisper and Logan swallowed hard before reaching over to hold her. She had been doing so well, but thoughts of her family still haunted her. He thought of the cross she always wore. She had taken it off a few days back. He hoped it didn't mean she had given up hope, but holding her sobbing in his arms, he admitted to himself that she had. He stroked and breathed into her hair.
"Marie darling, you don't know that. You'll see him again."
"I love being here with you, but I miss them so much."
Logan sighed heavily. He was in heaven, but she wasn't. She had family, a life, a real home. Of course she wanted off. Why wouldn't she? But it hurt to admit that she belonged to another life he only knew stories about. The lingering doubt resurfaced again. What if she only loved him out of loneliness, out of need? He lifted her chin and wiped away some of her tears.
"What if you were pregnant Marie. Would it bother you to have my child?"
She pulled back perfectly straight and blinked at him.
"What?"
Logan swallowed gingerly in complete fear.
"A child with me?"
Marie clasped the Battenberg covers tightly.
"Please don't mean what I think you mean."
Logan felt shame envelope him.
"Off this island I'm lower than your servants Marie. You'd be with a nobleman, not a sailor."
Marie almost choked at the words. She was so sure they had been past this. She stared at him blankly.
"I don't care what our differences are. I might have once, but that doesn't matter anymore. I love you and even though it'd be dangerous to have a baby here, I wouldn't want to have one with anyone but you."
Her last word was a sob and Logan instantly regretted having thrown his insecurities on her. She loved him. It was true and different or not, they needed each other desperately. With that same thought he brought her into a kiss. A gentle kiss that spoke of forgiveness and redemption. Of a love blind to differences and bloodlines. His face wet from her tears, Logan muttered against her lips.
"I'm sorry Marie, I love you darling."
Marie inhaled deeply and pressed her forehead to him again.
"If I am, than it'll be okay Logan. It'll be okay."
Logan dove into her neck in an embrace. Bringing her back down to the mats, he kissed at her face softly, smoothing words over her skin.
"I know Marie, I know darling."
Tired but relieved, Marie brought a hand to her stomach. She rubbed at the skin there and tightened her grip on Logan's hair. She needed him, more than anything. They would be fine. Even with a baby, they would be fine. Seeing her hand move to cradle her stomach, Logan moved down to plant soft kisses on her belly where her hand moved. It was a gentle action, one that whoever knew gruff, merciless Logan that took carelessly and had little regard for life other than his own would never think he was capable of. Hearing Marie's soft sigh, Logan looked up.
"Marie?"
She bit at her lip and looked down to cradle his face in her hands.
"Yes. Please."
Logan kissed at the fingers cradling him and pulled at the lace, bringing it past her thighs, past her knees, and past her feet. Moving back up, he untied the cloth he was wearing and brushed her hair away from her chest with both hands and planted kisses on her tightening nipples. Shifting slowly, he brought himself into her. In a slow, languid pace that slowly tightened and lubricated, they moved together. In little time, Marie hitched her breath and climaxed. Gentle waves breaking over her, she clasped at Logan tightly who moved until he did the same. Sharing one last equally slow and languid kiss they tiredly fell asleep almost instantly once they were done. Logan spooned her from behind, one bent arm serving as both their pillows, the other still smoothing circles into Marie's belly. In the distance over the ocean, lightening crackled, but both were already too far gone in sleep to hear it.
They awoke early in the afternoon when a sudden gusty breeze, that felt surprisingly chill for the typical weather they received, traversed the shelter. Hearing a peculiar noise above the roaring surf, Logan bolted upright, one head automatically reaching for the knife he kept in his corner. Marie woke up and looked around with wide eyes.
"Logan?"
"Shhh."
He silenced her with a finger to her lips and stealthily got up. Parting the curtain entrance slowly, his eyes quickly scanned the camp. The only sound was Marie rustling over the mats.
"Logan?"
He straightened out and looked over at the horizon. The clear sky they had witnessed being born was gone, replaced by a mass of clouds that the ocean breeze was bringing in. Since their arrival it had rained maybe once or twice a week, but this looked serious. On the sea, he could predict bad weather days ahead of time, but being on land thwarted that ability significantly. He did not see this one coming. It was unexpected and had he known, he would have gone hunting earlier.
"Don't worry darling. It was just the wind."
He went to take the sleeves which were hanging off a nearby tree. By now, Marie was fully awake and peering out into the horizon as well. For a moment, Logan caught his breath. Marie looked beautiful nearly naked with her hair fluttering in the wind. Which was blowing pretty strong he noticed.
"Logan, this looks as bad as that day. You think it'll hold?"
He gave the shelter a wary look and dropped the sleeves in the rum trunk.
"It will if we brace the trunks against it."
He approached Marie and planted a kiss on her shoulder. She gave him an appreciative glance before handing him his cloth. Logan tied it on with a grin and started pushing the trunks into position right up against the shelter.
"I'll put everything else away."
Marie started collecting everything they had out just as the wind kicked up. Sand everywhere, she gathered what they had in fruits, some bottles of water and a few books and sheets into the shelter. Then she remembered Raven. Looking up dejectedly to see his perch empty except for a few cracked seeds, she frowned and turned to Logan. She had to yell over the crash of the surf and the howling wind.
"Raven's gone!"
Logan looked at Marie's concerned expression and gave the trunks a final push. The sand was making it harder to see all of a sudden.
"He always comes and goes. Probably safer in the forest anyway."
Marie fought the hair flapping over her face and scanned the nearby forest edge with her eyes. Everything was swaying and the stretch of beach between them was already littered with broken palm leaves snapped off in the wind. It was true that he always flew off when he pleased. She turned to face Logan who was moving the stones of the fire ring closer together.
"He probably knows where to hide."
Logan shook the sand from his hands and pushed her back towards the shelter with a hand to her back.
"He's safe. Let's go."
Marie hustled in through the curtain and Logan gave the tumultuous ocean one last look before following her in. She started sorting all the things they had brought in. Outside, huge heavy drops of rain started falling, thwacking loudly on the driftwood and thatched leaf roof. Marie gave Logan an unsure look.
"How long you'll think it will last?"
Logan clicked open his compass and snapped it shut almost instantly.
"Till the night at least. And don't worry Raven is safe. He's done this before."
She swallowed uncertainly and rubbed her stomach again. Logan remembered she hadn't eaten and stretched a hand towards her.
"Come here."
She crawled over and settled in his lap, straddling either side of his hips. Logan brought a plum to her lips with a smile.
"You're eating for two now."
Marie blushed and smiled at the thought. It still seemed like such a foreign concept. Her. A mother. Remembering caramel colored fingers entwined with her own, she sighed and leaned forward into Logan's chest.
"You really think I'm with child Logan?"
He brought the fruit to her lips again and started pulling her hair to her back.
"I don't know. I think so, but time will tell soon enough."
Marie chewed slowly and thought that over. She was going to be a mother. Daddy was going to be a grandfather and Kitty an aunt. The thought tickled her somehow. Taking a final bite of the fruit and disentangling her limbs from Logan's, Marie moved to a shell she had in the far corner of the hut. Taking it out reverently, she opened the chain's clasp and moved to Logan's lap again.
"Please?"
He took the chain with a smile and Marie turned for better access. When he finally finished hooking the little clasp, Marie turned and straddled him again with a coy smile.
"So does that mean you can…you know."
He grinned at the crooked smile.
"Read? Sure we got nothing but time today."
She widened her eyes in exasperation.
"Logan! That's not what I meant."
Logan chuckled. After all was said and done, she couldn't even say it.
"What do you mean?"
She shifted uncomfortably on his lap, absentmindedly pulling at the string that tied his cloth together.
"You know."
He looked into her flushed face and moved his hands to cup her breasts, wondering if there was still any aloe gel left around.
"Yeah darling, we could."
Marie grinned and finished tugging at his loincloth while Logan's hands got more insistent. Laying back completely, he brought her down with him and marveled at how willingly she kissed at his chest. Feeling the drag of her breasts over his sensitive hairs and the slightly cooler feel of her chain on his skin, he smiled. Despite the howling wind and forceful rain that pelted the hut, Logan felt better than he had all day. She still had hope. She had put it back on because of it. The baby was giving her hope. Their baby. Their child. Threading his hands in Marie's hair, Logan wallowed in possessiveness and brought her up to his face, pressing a searing kiss to her lips. After a few minutes, he pulled back and looked at her with solid resolve.
"If we ever get off this island, promise me the first thing you'll do is be my wife."
Marie blinked at him a few times, before his growly words registered.
"First thing."
Logan brought her crashing down to his face again. Grinding into each other furiously, they embarked in the same kind of passionate lovemaking that conceived their child to begin with.
Somewhere over churning Caribbean waters, Remy Lebeau looked over his ship's masts and into the threatening sky. He had searched for close to two weeks and the first mate just reported to him that they needed to head back to Puerto Nuevo soon for restocking. But there was still so much to cover. Cursing over the turning black waters in French, Lebeau tightened his grip on the rail of the Santa Anna and closed his eyes tight. If only he had come with her. If only he had married her before she left. This might have never happened.
Straightening his black waistcoat, the nobleman let himself at least believe that she could still be alive. Cable, the skipper, had said that he saw them go over the Isabella's hull. He claimed they could be alive on one of the hundreds of tiny unmapped islands that littered the tepid waters. Closing his eyes again just as rain began to fall heavily, Lebeau dismissed the image of the two being together. He couldn't bare it and although everyone that was left on the Esmeralda claimed that he had sacrificed his life for her, Lebeau knew he was a savage. A savage interested in only one thing. He saw it in the man's eyes that day on the wharf when Marie spoke up for him. It was wanting. He had wanted her from the very beginning.
Fingering the silver pistol he had at his side, Lebeau twisted his handsome features into a grimace. Already Xavier had dispatched another three ships from Puerto Nuevo. No thanks to St. John, Xavier already had it in his mind that the hero of the story was the savage. But the savage was not taking what was his. Turning and heading to the helm, Lebeau gave the crew a final command.
"We will not turn back, until we find her! So carry on, dere are still more water and islands to cover!!"
Turning back to stare over the waters, Lebeau let vengeance hatch a plan in his mind. The savage and his beautiful Marie Elizabeth. Alone. He wouldn't let that happen. What was his, was his and feeling along his pistol, Lebeau swore to the deep waters that nothing would take what was rightfully his.
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