VII. Books and Aloe
They had dinner in pleasant silence after boar proofing the camp with the shells. Watching Marie chew on some fruit, Logan wondered what prompted such a big change. She seemed almost happy to be there. About to ask her about it, he was stopped again when she got up and walked to the Jean trunk. Sorting through the dozen or so books, she made a selection and moved to the fire to sit. Starting on page one, she began to read to herself. Not sure he should interrupt, Logan sighed in frustration and cleaned up. Eventually he was done and she was still reading, lost in a private world of letters and words so foreign to him. He knew from watching her countless hours on the deck of the Esmeralda that she could do it for hours on end without so much as looking up. It was frustrating in a way, because he was alone now with nothing to do except listen to the surf.
Going to the rum trunk, he threw on his shirt, opened a second bottle and eased back with a piece of wood he figured he could fashion into a pipe of some sort for his tobacco. He worked at it for an eternity, carefully shaving slices of wood with his knife, while watching Marie's eyes move back and forth on a page. Eventually she eased onto her stomach in the sand for a more comfortable position. A short while later, he had had all the silence he could take.
"Do you want a drink?"
She didn't look up or even smile at the memory.
"No, thank you."
He capped the bottle and threw it to the side. On to the more direct approach.
"What are you reading?"
"The Illiad."
Logan nodded and that got Marie's attention.
"Have you read it before?"
He stared at her for a minute. Was she serious?
"I can't read."
Marie blinked at him. Logan resumed his tinkering. The only person he knew that could read was Magnus. And he was pretty lousy at it he assumed from all the fights he would get into with accountants and financiers. As a sailor, it wasn't a necessity and as a commoner, a guaranteed improbability. But Logan had never felt embarrassed by it before. Shaving a large chunk of his rapidly dwindling pipe, he cursed himself for having started down this path of conversation.
"Would you like to read?"
Logan searched Marie's face for a hint of laughter. There wasn't any.
"What do you mean?"
She closed the book and sat up. The parrot cawed from his perch.
"I could teach you if you'd like."
Logan snorted and shook his head.
"You teach me how to read? That's stupid."
Marie crawled over to his side of the fire on her knees.
"It's not stupid. Reading is a fine and entertaining past-time as well as a necessity. And I happen to be an excellent tutor."
Logan frowned.
"I didn't say reading was stupid, I said teaching me was stupid."
He tossed the wood that would never be a pipe to the side and started to sharpen his knife with the stone the shaving knife came with.
"That's still not stupid. It would be a grand thing if you read."
Logan swiped the stone across the blade edge in a deliberately wide arc.
"Because it'd make me less of a Barbarian?"
Marie sat back on her legs.
"I didn't say that."
"But that's what you meant."
"No, I didn't. Must you argue for everything?"
Logan didn't answer and resumed his sharpening. There was no way he would let her teach him. It was humiliating. Beside the fact that she already thought he was a savage, that would prove it to him too. Frustrated, he took another drink. Marie surprised him by speaking up again after a long stretch of silence.
"If you teach me how to fish and hunt, I'll gladly teach you how to read."
Logan wiped at his lips and put the bottle down.
"What?"
"You heard me, teach me the things you know, and I'll teach you things I know. Like a trade. That way you won't be embarrassed and I'll learn to defend myself."
Logan leaned forward and repeated slowly into her face.
"I am not embarrassed."
Marie rolled her eyes and opened her book again.
"Nevermind. I knew you wouldn't go for it."
Logan leaned back and watched her. So he was embarrassed. And she knew it. So what? It didn't matter because reading was something he never needed before anyway. He resumed his careful sharpening and thought about her words. It was actually not a bad idea to teach her how to fish and things, but to have her realize how ignorant he was would not be easy. He shot a look past the warmth of the fire and to the forest swaying behind them.
She was taking to wandering away more and more. It was troubling in a way, because not only did it mean she needed him less, but that she ran into more dangerous situations without him. In the time she was gone, she had wandered around alone or hours more interested in her bird than the dangers everywhere. The thought he had had earlier returned to gnaw at him. She did need to learn how to handle herself and if that meant having to suffer humiliation, so be it.
He was about to tell her he would agree on her little trade when the parrot cawed and she squealed. It had swooped down to her shoulder and was flapping his good wing into her hair. She tried to soothe him while she giggled and reprimanded.
"Hey, are you trying to scare me to death?"
She dug into a nearby shell for more seeds. Giving him a few, she pet him until he calmed down. Walking back over to the perch she added some seeds to keep him busy.
"We should cook that thing tomorrow."
Marie eyes widened in fear.
"You wouldn't dare!!"
Logan grinned and continued his purposeful sharpening. Marie ran over and fell to her knees beside him.
"Please don't hurt him. He's really tame and I'm going to teach him how to talk."
Logan shot up an eyebrow at her and she sunk back.
"I am! They are capable of saying many things. You'll see."
Knowing she wasn't going to convince him, she went to pick up her book again, but an itch caused her to look back at her shoulder. She ventured a hand to the tender area and hissed in pain. Logan perked up immediately.
"What's wrong?"
"My shoulder. I think I'm getting a burn and parrot just scratched me."
Tossing the knife and sharpener to the side, Logan scooted over to where Marie was kneeling in the sand.
"Let me see."
Marie turned slightly and Logan brushed her hair back to the other side for a better view. He frowned. It wasn't much of a scratch or sunburn for that matter, but Marie's delicate skin didn't take kindly to either things.
"Well?"
Logan ventured a hand across the scratch. She flinched back slightly.
"You need to clean it. Maybe with the rum."
Marie turned to face him with wide eyes.
"That will burn!"
"Yes, but I'll be better than an infection. This is bleeding a little."
Before she had time to process that, Logan reached for the bottle and the towel it had been wrapped in. Marie bit her lower lip and moved her hair to one side.
"Maybe afterwards, you can put some of that stuff you found. You said it was for skin."
Marie perked up again.
"You're right."
She went to fetch the aloe in a shell and sat before Logan again.
"Brace yourself."
She did, but it made no difference. The alcohol burned the open flesh and Marie groaned in pain. Logan apologized profusely to her back, but kept dabbing at it anyway. When it stopped bleeding completely, he looked at the aloe questioningly.
"How does this work?"
Marie kept her eyes closed.
"Just rub some on."
He took a scoop and was instantly surprised at it's coolness. That itself would make it good for burns, but still debating the merits of what he was doing, Logan eased it over Marie's shoulders. The gel was green but translucent with a fresh, heady, herbal scent. Melting at the warm temperature of her skin, it dissolved perfectly, leaving a slightly slippery feel to it.
Lost in the smoothness, Logan breathed in the scent and eased in slightly towards her neck with his eyes closed. It was a graceful neck, and sliding slippery fingers along it, he marveled at how perfect it could be. Moving down on either side of her neck, his hands eventually reached the straps of her slipdress, but oblivious to it, Logan kept going, taking the straps down over her shoulders with the sweep of his hands.
Now firmly gripping her arms, Logan felt Marie turn. He opened his eyes only to find hers staring back. They were wide and panicked and Logan wondered what he had done. Then he looked down. The straps of her dress were tangled in his hands, hovering on her upper arms. His gaze widened, because the action brought her bodice down, revealing soft mounds of flesh achingly beautiful in the flickering firelight. And she was breathing hard. He could see clearly in the way her chest rose and fell. His eyes snapped back up to hers. She was terrified, but knowing that he couldn't walk away, couldn't pretend she wasn't in his arms, couldn't deny that he wanted her so bad, Logan ignored the fear and swept down to meet her lips.
The kiss wasn't any kind of soft or gentle, it was full of need and desire. Crushing into her, Logan felt Marie push back with a muffled protest, but he couldn't let her go. Moving a hand up into her hair, Logan brought her face up to him and pressed urgently. A few seconds later, she stopped squirming, a few seconds after that she leaned back into him willingly and eventually her arms wrapped around his neck. Already flush against his body, Logan pulled Marie even closer with his hand splayed over the small of her back.
Lost in unfamiliar sensations, Marie withered. She still wanted to run, but her body transpired against her. It arched into Logan's arms and relished the feel of his soft lips. The same lips that were prying her mouth open. Suddenly terrified again, Marie went to pull back, but he was relentless. Her lips gave way under his insistence and he swept the inside of her mouth and tangled with her tongue. Shocked, Marie opened her eyes and used the hands she had around his neck to now push at his chest.
""L-l-logan."
It was a plaintive plea and Logan snapped out of himself long enough to realize she was about to cry. He released his grip, only to have her gasp as she stood and fought to keep her slip front from falling down. Pressing on the bodice with her hand, she backed into the rum trunk with a thud. Not wanting her to run away, Logan reached out but kept his hand hovering in the distance between them. His brain fought the urge his hand had to finish reaching and touching her. They had not wavered their gaze the whole entire time and were still panting from the searing kiss they had shared. Marie brought a hand to her abused lips. They tasted like rum.
"Marie, I…"
Logan closed his mouth and tried again, but nothing came out. He stepped forward, but every step he took, she took one around the trunk in response. Eventually Marie closed her eyes and went to turn around. Logan watched in horror as her tears gathered at the corner of her eyes. She was so ashamed, so scared of him. He couldn't let her go without telling her he was sorry, that she hadn't done anything wrong. But she just wanted to get away. She still felt his lips burning on hers and the thought was as attractive as it was repelling. But she couldn't do it. It was wrong.
Then she turned. He grabbed at her hand before he could think of it and she stumbled back, right into his arms again. She was so close. Her body froze, but his reacted. He kissed her again, without thinking whatsoever, only feeling. She tasted wonderful, of the sweet fruits she knew so much about. He held on tightly, backing into the wood division where she changed. It was to keep her from him, but feeling the silk of her lips against his, Logan knew nothing could keep her from him now.
Marie could no longer fight what was happening. She ached for him, a wonderful, horrible ache that only wanted him closer. Her arms were dangling at her side, but she needed him closer still. She plunged her hands into his hair, pulling at him, bringing him to her to consume. She had no idea how to respond to his urging mouth, but his hand at her neck prompted her to open her mouth to him and let him lead. And that he did. He probed and massaged and tasted until her lips ached and neither could hardly breathe any longer.
Knowing she couldn't possibly be breathing anymore, Logan pulled back an inch from her face. Her eyes were still closed and panting wildly, Logan watched her heavy lashes rest on her cheeks. His thumbs made little circles on her temples and when she finally trusted herself enough to open her eyes, all he could see was desire. Not fear, but want. It scared him a little, because that was the real reason he hadn't touched her. But there it was, clear as day, and just as suddenly there was something else. A familiar flash of shame. She broke his gaze and looked down at the hands she placed on his shoulders and shivered a little. Logan's heart turned. He had been wrong. What had stopped them wasn't her lack of interest, and definitely not his. It was her propriety, her well-instilled sense of shame and restraint and embarrassment. But it was who she was, what they had made her. And he couldn't undo her world. This was only a brief respite from that world of rules and image. She would return to it, and he couldn't disgrace her that way.
Moving a hand down her face, he lifted her chin to meet his gaze again. He didn't know how to say it, but she needed to understand. He would show her by kissing her again. A soft lingering kiss that was a sigh compared to the others. One to soothe the lips they had so furiously ground into each other. He moved to her jaw, feathering kisses slowly up it's curve to her ear. She moved her hands back up to the hair tangled at the base of his neck. The brush of his skin on her felt so exquisite, so divine. She brushed her lips against his long sideburns, wanting to feel their texture, their scratch against her. Although he had shaved that morning, he already had stubble covering his chin and that texture inflamed her. She gasped and Logan stopped his kissing and breathed against her skin. Dropping his lips to her shoulder, he kissed it delicately before taking the straps he had pushed off and setting them firmly back up again. He kissed at one briefly, then looked up.
"I'm sorry Marie."
She blinked at him a few times, turning a bright red and looking down again. She actually sunk a little into the planks she was pressed into.
"Umm, it's okay. I, we…"
The parrot cawed and he smiled at her. She didn't want to stop. That was all he needed. The realization was amazing. Not able to stand seeing her so uncomfortable, Logan pulled her into an embrace. She complied wholeheartedly and wrapped her arms low on his waist. He held her for a minute before kissing the top of her head and finding her hand. Stopping only to pick up the knife he dropped in the sand, he sheathed it in it's leather and walked around the fire.
Marie followed numbly. She knew where they were going and it terrified her all over again. She was about to protest when he pulled back the curtain, but in an unforeseen move, he pulled her forward and kissed her again. Lost in his touch already, Marie wrapped herself around him and when Logan pulled back, she was shocked to be lying by him. There was a new moon, so there was absolutely no moonlight, but the fire reflected somewhat through the curtain and lit the room in subtle dark orange. Able to make out his dark features in the light, Marie stared at Logan so close to her. His face was only inches away, and not resisting the temptation, she ran her fingers over his jaw, his profile, his eyebrows, and especially his lips. It was bold of her, but she wanted to touch all of him, if only to memorize the lines.
The exploration prompted Logan to close his eyes and concentrate on pacing. He loved the silk of her hands and he let her explore at her own pace. When he finally opened his eyes, Marie eased down to meet his lips. Logan smiled triumphantly under their light pressure. She wanted him and that thought was magnificently arousing. Rubbing her sides gently as she proceeded to softly kiss all the places she had already touched on his face, Logan growled low in his chest. The sound made Marie pull back and cock her head to one side. Logan opened his eyes and grinned. Marie brought a hand to stop her giggle and then placed her head over his chest to hear the sound closer.
"You're purring!"
"I'm happy."
That made her smile vanish. Running her hands over the white shirt, Marie sighed and turned her face slightly to kiss the spot over his heart where his shirt was open. The grumble deepened and she wondered why she was still there instead of the furthest stretch of beach away from him. Logan noticed the change and buried a hand in her hair.
"Are you okay?"
Marie blushed in the dark. Logan didn't see it, but he could feel the heat of her cheeks on his chest.
"I shouldn't be doing this."
Logan swallowed the lump in his throat and the grumble in his chest was completely gone now.
"Do you want to stop?"
Marie stopped breathing and racked her brain.
"I don't want to, you feel so…nice."
Logan smiled despite his turmoil. He never would have thought of that one. He picked her up by the shoulders and dragged her up to eye-level. Without saying a word, he sat up and pulled the shirt he was wearing over his head. Tossing it to the side, he mimicked what Marie had been doing earlier and kissed random spots around her face until he reached her mouth. But when he tasted her, it was an inevitability to surrender completely. They shared a staggering kiss that spoke of connection and desire. Unable to keep his hands from wandering, Logan felt along her thighs all the way up to her waist. Hesitant at the hands under her dress Marie tried to stop, but his lips made that impossible. Pulling the tie from Logan's hair completely off, she savored the feel of his long silky strands brushing the sides of her face when he bent over her. And he was relentless in his kissing, occasionally moving down to her neck to give her time to catch her breath, Logan indulged in tasting every bit of her. Suddenly remembering something, he pulled back. Marie's eyes fluttered open at the loss of heat.
"How's your back?"
She slowed her panting enough to answer.
"Better."
Looking at how nice her chest looked when she was panting, Logan decided it was time to loose the dress. He dove right back into her neck, but his hands were now kneading her. Marie gasped when she felt them, but couldn't comment with the mouth suddenly over hers. When he pulled back, all her complaints were forgotten. He was working soft circles into her flesh and the friction of his hardened hands on her breasts was unbearable. Moaning slightly, she squirmed under the feel. Logan took no time in kissing a trail across her collarbone and down her chest. Marie's hands were in his hair, so Logan pulled back in order to open the tie that held the ruffled neckline in place. Not sure what to expect Marie looked up at him and moved her hands down to his shoulders. Logan felt her hesitation and kissed her again before slowly tugging the top of the slip away from her. Marie's heart pounded and she watched him do it. His eyes got wider and not able to control the shame that ran so deep in her, Marie crossed her arms over her chest and eased back a little. Logan pinned her with his body and brought her chin up to meet his gaze.
"Hey, I'm not going to hurt you."
Marie stared at the slightly dilated eyes. His breath was so hot on her, his taste so intoxicating. She looked down again. His chest was heaving in the wan light, making her body stir with need.
"I know."
Logan kissed her again, pining her arms between them. Pulling back slowly, he ran his hands along her face a minute before moving down to her breasts. She still had her arms crossed over them, but the burn his lips caused made her want to pull him closer. Lifting them once again into his long hair, Marie moaned as he descended on her flesh again, taking a deliciously slow time kissing every square inch of her. And when she didn't think it could be more exquisite, Logan opened his mouth to lave, lick and suckle. By now, she was moaning with every movement as a curious heat tangled through her every fiber, seemingly to meet at the center of her being, causing her to loose all conscious thought and reverting back to the simple, addictive need for pleasure.
Logan brushed his lips over Marie's heated flesh and wondered if he should stop. Their touching had escalated to an unbearable point and the hardness in his trousers increased with every moan, with every whimper. She was marvelously pliable under his arms and shaking from the tension to possess her, Logan pulled Marie's dress past her hips and discarded it to the side. He could smell her, waiting. Not wanting anything more out of life but that very wetness, he pressed his knee into her apex, eliciting another moan from her reddened lips. Kissing the indent in her throat, he looked into her face and waited for her eyes to open and meet his.
"Marie I want to touch you."
Marie gazed at him with half opened lids and cradled his face in her hands. She already knew the response to that and as expected, he closed his eyes and grumbled. She smiled at the power to turn the gruff sailor into a purring kitten. She raised on her elbow to kiss his lips. Lips she had already gotten too addicted to. His hand on her hip tightened and the one in her neck rubbed her hair slightly. She couldn't believe the tenderness in his embrace and all memory of a question vanished instantly. But he pulled back and asked again.
"Let me touch you."
Marie's brow furrowed slightly. He was kissing her, touching her already. The thought made her blush again. He saw the blush and sighed. She was so inexperienced it made feel guilty. The thought that reverberated in his head when they were in the pool jarred him again. Her virginity meant so much to her, he couldn't take it because it didn't belong to him. It was hers to give, and she had to know what she was getting into completely. He could show her others things though, just not that one.
Still lost in conflicting thoughts, Logan became aware of the kisses she was pressing into his neck. He felt the prickliness of his beard and regretted not shaving earlier. But it was a fleeting thought as she reached the space behind his ear. His skin tingled with her touch and without thinking, he slid his hand from where it rested on her hip to the space that he ached to own. Sliding over the stretching lace that covered her, he grunted when he felt the heat of her under his fingers. She jumped back instantly and he felt stupid for not having made it clearer. He shifted by her side. How exactly could he say it?
"I umm, do you trust me?"
Marie blinked at him. He had done nothing but make her feel safe, wanted.
"Yes, I trust you Logan."
The smile returned to his face. He would show her, make her see, make her scream. Something in him latched onto that idea. He wanted to make her scream. The thought buzzed in his head as he sat up on his knees and brought her forward on his lap. Marie sighed as she was pulled into a crushing kiss, but it was over soon enough. He didn't want her to feel his erection so he pulled her back and lay her down on the velvet pillow she had given him. All around them, blankets and linens were all askew, but he wanted her comfortable, perfectly at ease.
"Just relax, I want to make this good for you."
Marie looked up at him. She'd never felt so good in her life. What more could there be? But her thinking came to a sharp end when he began kissing trails down her body again. Sweeping his tongue half the way down, he continued trailing kisses until he reached the lace tap panties she was wearing. He ventured a look up. She had her eyes closed to drink in all the sensations. He paused long enough to get her attention. When she finally looked down, he pulled at the thin satin bow that rested at her belly. Her eyes grew wide in realization as he slowly unlaced the five x's that led down to her crotch.
He felt her shift slightly but didn't pause as he pushed both sides of the fabric and dipped down to the skin it revealed. Kissing the tender flesh, Logan slid his hands under the garment on either side of his face and swept it down and away with a single swipe. Marie gasped both out the surprise as well as the insistence his hands posed when they spread her legs before him. Before she could protest, his lips pressed into the flesh she never knew could ache so painfully. Logan kissed and licked and bit at her, first into the silky thatch of hair that shielded her, then the soft skin that lay beneath it and eventually the delicate holds that lay within. She clutched at the sheets by her in agony as he worked her flesh, making her wet and achy and unbelievably hot. It was a heat that came from every place he had kissed to converge where he was now. She cried out in this agony, giving Logan all the encouragement he needed to pour all his effort in his attentions.
It was what he wanted, to be buried in her scent, in the core of her, into her sex. Sliding one of the hands that were holding her thighs apart down to her heat, he pulled back to watch her face. But his ministrations continued with his hand. He worked concentric circles into her, focusing into the bud that he knew would be her downfall and unable to resist the urge, he slid his finger into her slippery wetness. It was so tight and soft, he couldn't resist the pull to taste her again.
Marie sat up at the feel of the dual pleasure of being suckled and penetrated at the same time. Logan responded by shifting and pulling her forward into him. Marie let herself be pulled. What else could she do against the torrent of sensation that flooded her? Needing to touch him, hold him, she ventured a hand to the back of his neck, where his hair draped over his shoulders. Clutching at him tightly, she moaned. His name escaped her in broken syllables. Both begging and pleading, she let herself get taken closer and closer to an infinite point where the pressure in her exploded into a shattering moment that left her gasping in exhaustion. She fell back, but strong arms caught her and brought her forward again. She clutched at the chest before her, feeling the residual waves of pleasure run through her.
Logan held onto Marie's glistening body, tempering the rage of feelings that begged release in him. She was still shivering in his arms, when he brought her back and kissed her. She responded immediately, clutching at him tiredly. Breaking the contact, he leaned his forehead to hers. Needing to feel more of him, Marie pressed up into his body, but Logan pulled back. The feel of her was too strong to deny. He could still smell her on himself and was too hard to stay so near to it and keep himself under control. Still holding her hips away from his body, Logan cleared his throat.
"You should sleep now."
Marie's hazy smile faded. They had been touching and holding for hours and he had done it with such softness. There was none of that in his actions now. He disentangled himself from her quickly and turned around to fuss with his shirt. Suddenly very self-aware, Marie crossed her arms around herself. She wasn't sure why but she wanted to cry. Grabbing the velvet by her side, she covered herself with it and slid to her side of the mats. Logan turned and gave her her dress. Marie took it silently and wondered how she ever let things go so far.
"Are you mad at me?"
The words stopped him in mid action. Logan took a minute before answering. He still had his back to her.
"No Marie, just go to sleep. I'm going to get a drink."
Marie sunk back even more. He was really mad and even though he tried to hide it in his voice, he couldn't hide it in his body language. She could see the muscles in his back and arms straining. Although they had spent a relatively few number of days together, she knew him well enough to know he was lying. She was about to ask him why, but he was already on his feet and leaving. She could see his retreating outline in the sheet. He was taking long strides and true enough she heard the swush of liquid when he took the bottle he had been drinking earlier and walked off.
Marie eased down into the velvet with a lump in her throat. Is this the way it was? How it was supposed to be? She thought back to every lecture Ms. Witherstone had given on the topic of sex. Basically you were damned if you did it and men would never think you more than a tramp, plus once you were married, it was only needed for procreation. She shut her eyes tight at the memory of the Josephine Waters story. She had a `common' reputation and had been kicked out school and sent to a convent. Marie sat back up again.
What if people found out? What if she had a reputation? Marie clasped her hand over her mouth. What would Kitty think? And Remy. A tear ran down her face at the thought of her fiancé. He had kissed her once, twice actually, and it had been nothing like tonight. It couldn't begin to compare and that thought made her miserable. She had enjoyed it. Loved it actually. She had a haunting suspicion that that was what was so damning about sex to begin with. It was addictive. Only now Logan hated her. She wasn't sure why, but she was less to him now and it was all her fault. She hadn't stopped him. St. John always told her men were after one thing. He made it clear he disliked Remy from day one because of that. Only now she couldn't marry him. She wasn't very sure she like him either, but there was no way she could do it now. Marie looked down at her empty ring finger and started to cry in earnest. She was unfaithful and had been so wrong.
Only it didn't feel wrong. Nothing about it felt wrong. She glanced up at the tangle of linens she was lying in. She could still taste him, still smell him. Logan was magnificent and had made her feel what words couldn't describe. She understood now why almost every song, poem and story had to do with love. But it wasn't easy and he hated her now. Marie blanched at a thought. How could she live on this island with just him around? It was so unfair. And what if he wanted to do it again? Shaking her head, Marie stood up, still wrapped in the velvet blanket. She had to speak to him. Ask him why he was mad. What she had done wrong. Tell him it was a mistake. That she didn't blame him for anything, but that it was a mistake.
Wiping the tears she had in her eyes, Marie pushed past the entrance curtain and stepped onto the sandy beach. They wind was blowing, but it was still fairly warm over the crash of the waves. She looked around and spotted him further down by the distance. It was a moonless night, but he was sitting against a tree and the residual light of the fire made his back visible, sniffling softly, she walked in that direction hoping she would know what to say. When she had almost reached him, Marie was about to call him when she caught a groan. Not sure what to make of it, Marie stepped a little more forward and froze in place at what she saw.
Logan had his pants open and was rubbing himself up and down. He was partially out of view because he wasn't facing her, but Marie blushed at the thought that she shouldn't be watching him. She recalled a medical book that she and Kitty had stolen out of Ms. Witherstone's library. They had giggled over the picture of a man like lunatics, but Logan looked nothing like that picture right now. Forgoing her conversation for another day, Marie was about to turn when he suddenly stopped moving and stood up. In a lightening quick movement, he took the bottle that he was holding and tossed it into the surf ahead of them. Marie flinched and was about to turn and run back when he turned first.
Logan stared at Marie just ten feet away from him in disbelief. They stood unmoving for a few minutes and she turned a complete shade of red. Even though it was dark he could tell and knew right away that she had seen him. Remembering that he was still pretty much exposed, he adjusted his pants in utter humiliation. He had come out here to finish, to release the tension that gripped him, that wouldn't let him sleep four feet from her, but it was useless. No matter how much he tried to concentrate on Marie writhing and moaning for him, he couldn't stop hearing the pain in her voice when she asked him if he was mad at her.
He had fucked up royally. He thought he could control himself enough to pleasure her, to make her see how much he wanted her, but it was too much to handle and he had probably made her think she did something wrong. Anger swelled in him because of that. He never cared before and when he finally did, he still managed to mess things up. She had done nothing wrong, but the tears gleaming in her eyes and the guilty expression she wore convinced him that she thought she did. And here she was again and instead of apologizing to her, all he wanted to do was take her.
"I told you to go to sleep."
She flinched and stammered.
"I, I, wanted to talk, make sure we're okay."
"We're fine, just go."
Marie stepped forward. He was trying to avoid her again and she couldn't leave without clearing the air.
"But you're mad at me and I'm sorry."
She sniffed and the tears started rolling down her face. Upset that she couldn't even say what she had come out to say, Marie turned and started trotting down the beach. Logan closed his eyes and cursed into the wind. He was right and it was worse than he thought.
"Marie!!"
Logan ran after her even though she didn't stop.
"I'm not mad at you!"
He stopped to control the edge in his voice and whirled her around. She was looking down so he lifted her chin with his hands. Marie grasped the velvet blanket tighter around herself.
"Look, I'm not mad at you, I'm mad at myself."
She blinked at him and frowned. He took a deep breath and figured he might as well go all the way.
"I shouldn't have touched you, but not because I didn't want to, because you…" He shifted his feet nervously and let go of her face. "You deserve better."
She stared at him in the near dark. She had never come across someone like him. He walked and talked like confidence personified. He was the only person that made fun of her, and was rude to her. Even had the audacity to call her your majesty, and he thought she was too good for him? The logic seemed insane and Marie couldn't let him believe that.
"That's not true. I'm no better than anyone else."
Logan looked into her eyes. It was what he had told her that day in the Esmeralda. That she was no better than anyone else, but those words seemed cruel now. She was special. Really special. She knew too much about plants, loved baths, spoke about a dozen languages, was incredibly brave, even thought she could teach a parrot to talk.
"I was angry at you."
Marie shook her head.
"No, Logan. You were right and I'd be lucky…… to have someone like you."
His heart practically thumped out of his chest. Her voice was real quiet and she shifted, taking a small step back. Logan caught her by the shoulders and pulled towards him. His mind was still processing what she had just said when his lips sputtered out the first thing that came to him.
"I love you Marie."
Marie pulled back and looked at his face. In the dim light, she poured over him. Remy had told her hundreds of times that he loved her, but it was never this straightforward, never this sincere. Aware that he was waiting, holding his breath, Marie closed her eyes and stepped up on her toes to meet his lips. Letting go of the blanket, she circled her arms around his neck and felt his lock behind her as well. She felt him clearly against her and in remembering how he pushed into her with his fingers moments ago, understood exactly how much she wanted to feel him in her now. After an endless moment, Marie pulled away and Logan settled her down again, but she didn't stop kissing him. Moving her hands to his chest, she kissed trails at his neck while her hand graced over his chest, over his hard stomach muscles and into his waistband.
Logan pulled back, but Marie moved quick to slip in and circle his girth with her hand. Logan groaned but she breathed into his ear one word that stopped him from removing her hand.
"Please."
She looked into his eyes to see if he understood. He kissed her again, deeply and longingly to show that yes, he did. Feeling him tighten under her hand, Marie disengaged from his lips long enough to look down between them and move both hands to unbutton his pants again. Feeling his breath quicken on her neck, she hurried faster. When she finally freed his erection and ran exploring hands up and down the length, he found her lips again to devour her. Unclasping the blanket she had secured around herself, Logan dropped it to the smooth sand beneath them and eased her down onto it, thrilled she was naked and still smelled like him. Marie smiled as the familiar heat she had felt earlier coursed through her again. It really was addictive.
"Are you sure?"
He said the words breathing hard against her skin. Marie kept feeling along the marvelously tight muscles on his abdomen too enthralled by the increasing wetness his fingers were propelling from her sex to answer. Logan looked up from his attention to her breasts and into her face. Marie looked down at the cease in activity and bit her lower lip.
"Positive."
Logan smiled too, and interested in doing the same to her bottom lip, pulled himself up over her body to kiss her. Feeling his hips ease in between her legs, Marie used her feet to push Logan's pants completely down. Running her hands down his contoured back, she sighed as he continued to work her core. A few minutes later, he removed his hands and smoothed her long hair back away from her face. He wanted to watch her every reaction and bracing himself, he prepared to take what she was offering him. Marie looked up into his eyes just as he entered her and knew instantly that she had found her destiny. Saphire rings and class differences forgotten, she knew that nothing would ever take him from her.
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