Parking 101
Scott wondered idly if Jean was having better luck then he was as he made his way into the garage. Catching sight of Jubilee hurrying in front of him he swore and sped up a bit. It wasn’t like he would suffer any more obvious embarrassment than anyone else. After all it wasn’t like he had to get naked with ‘Ro.
“There you are. You think you could walk any slower?” Logan bit out.
“I’m here aren’t I?” Scott groused as he settled on the lowered tailgate of Logan’s truck.
“Alright since you’re all here. We’re going to be studying parking. Just so you know parking does not mean you’re gonna get laid. If you’re really lucky all you’re going to get is felt up. Or in baseball terminology you’ll get to first base. Any questions?”
“How are ‘Ro and I going to be of help?” Scott asked wincing as his voice broke.
Logan smirked at him. “You two are going to park. Here in the garage where we can observe!”
“Oh no! Hell no Logan! I’m married for one and for two this is ridiculous. Why are you teaching this? They’ll never use any of it!”
“Yes we will.” Jubilee replied quickly. “Did the last lesson.”
“What was that?”
“Something about seduction.”
Logan groaned and eyed Scott just as Storm rushed into the room.
“So sorry I’m late. I had to stop off…what’s wrong Scott you look like you’ve lost your best friend.”
“No just any sense of self-respect I ever had.” Scott muttered glaring at Logan from behind the ruby lenses of his glasses. “So I guess we’re going to park?”
“Park?” Storm stared at him. “I already know how to park. What does parking a car have to do with Sexual Education?”
Logan hid a grin as the class laughed and Scott wilted. “Uh looks like you need a few pointers.”
“Well why don’t you and Storm do the exercise then?” Scott suggested. “Then you can teach her as well as the class.”
“Summers just shut up and get in the convertible.”
“Logan I do not know what…”
“Trust me ‘Ro you’ll have fun. It’s painless.”
Ororo eyed him warily but slid into the passenger side of the car.
“Okay rule number one of parking…the backseat is off limits. The whole point of parking is to explore the whole thrill of over the clothes, clumsy groping. It’s a precursor to the actually event.”
“So when does this event take place?” Jubilee cracked her gum.
“When you’re ready, in a nice place. No seedy motels, or parking lots or back alleys. Sex is extremely intimate and you have to trust your partner to be able to actually enjoy it.”
“So how does that equate into fucking behind a bar?”
“You have to be an animal for that.” Logan ground out. “Something that you keep asking about and I’ll show you.”
Jubilee snapped her mouth shut and paled but didn’t back away. Instead she nodded quickly and folded her hands over her lap.
“Good. Now on with the lesson. I’m not teaching you about my bad habits. I’m trying to teach you about how to be responsible for your own bodies, for your minds. Admittedly love doesn’t necessarily have to be involved…lust is one major factor that we’ll get to that can affect how you perceive the opposite sex. For example most people will always want something they can’t have.”
“An example would be Logan’s interest in Jean.” Scott smirked.
“That was lust I’m not gonna apologize for it. You live like I did you learn to trust your instincts, sex is one. However for you rug rats lust should be low on your list of priorities. Now then any questions about parking before the demonstration gets underway?”
Logan glanced around at his students who were shaking their heads and nodded quickly. “Okay. Now Scott I’m sure you’ve done this before so if you wouldn’t mind?”
“Why do I get the feeling that I’m the one going to get hit for this?” Scott whispered to himself.
“Jeannie knows what’s going on Scooter. ‘Sides she’s not here or I’d have her help out. Look at it this way…at least you won’t have to deal with the embarrassment of a hard on when you head back inside.”
Shall we get this over with perhaps?” ‘Ro asked. “I do have classes of my own to prepare for.”
With an apologetic look Scott leaned closer to ‘Ro. “I’m going to get killed for this.” He muttered. Nuzzling into her neck he wondered just how far Logan intended to go with this class. Would he be required to actually have sex in front of the entire bloody class?
“Remember you have to pay attention to the person you’re parking with. If there is any indication of unease or fear back off. If you don’t and you push things too far to fast its called rape ladies and gentleman and I’ll rip you a new asshole if I find out about it. Besides that you’ll also be prosecuted to the full extent of the law and you don’t want to go to prison because you let your hormones overpower your brain so much that you forgot that No means No!”
Scott sent Logan a glance and realized he wasn’t paying him any attention. The class on the other hand was and he suddenly wished that Sabertooth or Magento was standing there so he’d have something else to focus on. Something other than the smell of Ororo’s perfume, her shampoo, the scent that was fresh, clean like a summer rain storm. He was seriously going to kill Logan.
Pulling back from Ororo he smiled shakily and glanced at Logan who smirked back at him. “We done?” he muttered.
“Very much so.” Logan replied and turned his attention back to the class.
The last thing Scott heard as he hurried from the garage was Logan’s voice. “The point of this is to push your own limits, not you dates. If you’re getting to the point where you think you’re losing it back off and call it a night. There is no right or wrong way to do it.”
“So are we going to be expected to take a date and park?” Luther asked softly.
“No. As a matter of fact you won’t actually be participating in the exercise. Your job is so much more academic at this point. I want you to write a five page report detailing customs from around the world about ‘parking’. Any questions…”
All but running to his room Scott closed the door and locked it for good measure. He still had another week and a half before Jean was home and he had no plans to be readily available for Logan’s classes. The man was trying to humiliate him to death he was sure of it.
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