I don’t know what Marie was thinking when she allowed Kitty and Jubilee help her pick out the decorations. The thing was monstrous. It was a gigantic green tree with every branch covered in different colored balls. It was like the freakin’ rainbow had regurgitated on the tree and a crystal star completed the horrific sight. Jubilee had obviously picked out the numerous and horrendous yellow balls. Looking at them made me hate those two even more. Jubilee and Kitty that is, never Marie.
“Marie!” I called out, hoping that she would come to my aid.
“Yes?” she asked quietly. She was right behind me on the couch, reading a book. I knew that. Although, I suppose I didn’t need to yell. Oh well, she’s gotten a few years to get used to it.
“Do I hafta do this today?” Yeah, look at me, the big, bad, Wolverine whining to get out of work, instead of just doing so. What can I say? I’m a married man now.
“You’ve left it for the past two weeks,” she answered, her face still hidden by the book.
“You know, darlin’, the holidays were two weeks ago. It’d be insulting to take it down now, wouldn’t it?” I wasn’t going down without a fight. The question hung in the air but I knew she found me funny for trying to get out of this. It didn’t make me too happy.
“Fine. Make fun of your husband. Make him take down this gigantic tree that you bought and that you decorated—,”
“Yes, Logan, the tree that I bought and I decorated, not we.”
Damn. She wasn’t too thrilled that I hadn’t helped before. Now I had to take it down and I couldn’t even ask for help. “Sorry darlin’. Didn’t know you wanted me to come with you.”
“You can make it up by taking down the tree,” she said.
“You enjoying this?” I asked when she put down her book and crossed her legs underneath her.
“Oh yeah baby.” Good, she couldn’t be that angry with me, not even if she was using that phrase.
Snikt. Out came the claws until—
“No claws, Logan,” she began, “the tree’s fake and I would like to keep most of it intact.”
Fake? Oh wait, that would explain why I haven’t been able to smell that thing…And she wants to keep it?
“You mean we have to have this monstrosity for more holidays to come?”
“Yup.”
“No.”
“Oh yeah baby.”
Damn! How could anyone say no to that? The Wolverine sure can’t when she draws it out in that southern girl accent. So I went to take the star off the tree. I had figured that I would start from the top and go down. Bad idea. Half the colored balls came crashing down and I tried to catch them.
CRASH!
Too late. I looked over at Marie who had a sadistic glint in her eye; she was clearly enjoying this. I quickly snatched a ball from the tree to show her that I had at least caught one of them. However, the yellow color was so horrific and took me by surprise that I dropped it and stepped back.
Crunch. I let out a hiss of pain; that really hurt. I silently vowed that I would always wear shoes around a tree. I look at Marie for sympathy. She had none.
“Geez, Logan, you’re like a puppy dog. Get over it. You’ll heal.”
Harsh. She was enjoying it. Unbidden, Scooter’s face comes to mind saying, ‘Guess who wears the pants on that relationship’. Shut up, Scooter. I may be whipped but my girl makes up for it.
I pick another ball off the tree and suddenly I get an idea. I threw it at the wall.
Crash. I grinned. I’m the wolverine. I throw a couple more before Marie comes up behind me. She wraps her arms around my middle and brown eyes peer up at me, twinkling and mischievous.
“I’m sorry darlin’,” I said, “but I hate the tree and the decorations.”
Marie grinned. “Wanna know a secret?”
“What?”
“I hate it too.”
“What?!”
“You think I like anything that Jubilee and Kitty pick out?” she waved her hand at the tree, “I mean, seriously, yellow painted ornaments? They’re not even close to gold!”
“Then why’d you buy it?” I didn’t have to look at all this stuff for the past month? Or well, at least today?
“Well, Jubes and Kitty started talking about how it’d be so cool to see your expression if you liked it, and I decided I’d rather see your expression if you didn’t like it. Took you long enough to look at it.”
Too true…the closest he had come was Christmas morning, but Marie didn’t even bother to put on her robe; she had been working hard at trying to control her power. She still couldn’t control it, but his healing factor was building up immunity to it.
“Then why wouldn’t you let me use my claws?” he asked, focusing on the subject at hand.
“God Logan, you sound like a weenie. I wanted to watch you for more than two seconds…and I thought that maybe I could help,” she answered, picking up a purple colored ball and throwing it at the wall.
“That’s my girl,” I said, turning to kiss her on the lips.
“But we’re not done yet,” she said, “we have to destroy the rest.”
“Together?” I asked.
“Oh yeah baby. Together.”
The monstrous tree fell to its destruction in less than three minutes. No claws needed and it never stood a chance.
“Lets make this a tradition,” I said.
Marie smiled. “As long as it doesn’t take two weeks.”
“The day after Christmas special.”
“I like the sound of that.”
“Me too.”
And what happened next is nobody’s business.
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