Chapter 1
Hunched low over the back of her horse, gloved fingers wrapped in the thick black mane, Rogue's long auburn hair flew behind her in a wild tangle as she urged the animal on. "C'mon Ren." Her jean clad legs squeezed around the barrel of the bay gelding as they pounded across the field. Sitting up slightly, Rogue smiles as the wind whips tears from her eyes, reveling in the sensation of the straining muscles of the horse beneath her. She loved to ride bareback, without the interference of the saddle between her and the horse. It was the more physical contact then she ever had with people and Ren never judged her, didn't care that she was a mutant.
The mansion comes into view and she quietly pulls Ren down to an easy jog as they approach the barn. "Whoa." she murmurs at the gate to the corral as she slides off his sweaty back, loops the rein over her arm. She leads him through the gate and begins to hand walk him around the yard to cool him off. Resting her hand on Ren's neck she begins to talk to him. "Ya know Ren, sometimes I think ya horses are more intelligent then most people. Ya don't judge, ya don't hurt others to make yourself feel better... ya just care about the important things, the truly important things in life... that ya eat, sleep and are treated kindly. It makes me wonder why people can't do the same?"
She leads the now dry Ren to the post and trades the hackamore for the halter hanging there. She grabs a curry and begins working on his coat, the rich mahogany shining in the sun as she brushes the dried sweat from him. "Ren, you're a great friend and all, but I can't help but miss him. Ya see, he took a bit of my heart with him when he left and everyday it hurts a little more. I don't understand it Renny, they say that time heals all wounds? If that's so then why do I feel like I am dying inside?" Rogue's voice grows too thick with emotion to continue the stream of words, the same words she's spoken to Ren daily since shortly after Logan left and she met Ren.
Wandering into the horse barn one night, she was met with a pair of huge brown eyes that seemed to speak to her soul. Entering his stall, she was awed by the powerful, stocky horse with the muscles that bulged and rippled when he moved. She soon learned that he was a quarter horse, the only one in a barn full of warmbloods and his name was Renegade. Feeling an instant kinship with him, Rogue began taking riding lessons, preferring to ride bareback and discovered she was a natural on horseback. She took daily rides and often left for hours at a time, the rides seeming to help her cope with the nightmares that plagued her at nite.
Leading Ren back to his stall, she slips the halter off and pats him one last time, "See ya tomorrow Renny." Checking his water bucket and satisfied to find it full, she gives him one more rub on the nose and exits the barn, heading for the mansion to clean up and change clothes.
Slipping in her room, she starts shedding her clothes, the smell of horse sweat filling the room. Pausing, she takes a deep breath and smiles to herself. 'There is nothing like the smell of sweaty horses.' However, since not everyone enjoys the smell as much as she does, she tosses the clothes into the hamper. She then pads into the bathroom to shower, the dog tag around her neck rattling as she walked.
Scott Summers swore under his breath as he busted his knuckles when the wrench slipped. Since he had given up all hope of ever seeing his precious motorcycle again, he had been working on another one, trying rebuild a replica of his long lost toy. "Piece of..." The fearless leader of the X-Men stood up and flung the wrench at the offending frame. Parts lay scattered all over the garage floor, spead out on a huge white sheet so as not to lose so much as a single bolt. Fearless leader he may be, but he is still a man. A man once again thwarted by a machine. Sticking his knuckle in his mouth, he sucks the blood from it and stalks out of the garage, quitting while he still has all of his fingers. 'Tomorrow... I'll work on it tomorrow.... damn Logan anyway, it's all his fault...' His mental muttering is loud enough that Jean begins snickering to herself in the office as she goes through the mail. Sorting the mail in piles to hand out later to all the kids, she sobers immediately as she comes across a plain white envelope with no return address and a postmark from Mississippi.
With a huge black towel wrapped tightly around her, Rogue stepped from the bathroom in a cloud of steam, towel drying her hair when she pauses at the sight of a letter on the floor. It had obviously been slipped under her door, and she dove for it, hoping against hope it might be from Logan. A tightness gripped her chest at the thought of him and she sat on the bed, her hands shaking as she ripped the envelope open, never noticing the postmark.
Marie,
Your Mother is dying, if you wish to say good bye before she is gone, get here now.
Aunt Kathy
Tears well up in her eyes and the letter blurs from view as an overwhelming sorrow envelopes her. Falling back on the bed she curls up and sobs into her pillow. 'Oh mama... I'm so sorry... I miss you so...' Heaving sobs wrack her small body as she cries, her heart breaking. Leaving home was harder on her then she liked to admit, she grew up in the deep South, the darling daughter of loving parents. That all changed however, the moment it was known that she was a mutant, her Father shunned her, forced her away. Her Mother was heartbroken but wouldn't stand up to her husband's decision. Rogue had left her home, her family, to travel to parts unknown only to be saved by a very unlikely hero. Logan and everyone at the school had become her family but in the back of her mind, there was always the little part of her that would never let her forget what happened with her real family. The family that turned their back on her and hurt her so badly.
After several minutes, Rogue sits up in the bed and scrubs the tears from her face with the towel. Walking to the closet, she pulls on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt before dragging a comb through her hair. Picking up the letter in a trembling hand, she leaves the room and heads downstairs.
"Now listen here, One Eye, I'm telling you a damn train hit it."
Chapter 2
Scott's jaw clenches so tightly he sees stars as he stares at the man before him. Coming outside to see Logan walking up the drive with a knapsack slung over his back had shocked him and he was more upset to not see his bike then he was to see Logan. "A TRAIN?!? How is it that it hit the bike and not YOU??" Scott jabs his finger into the other man's chest, accusingly.
Logan smiles tightly, mockingly, his eyes glittering as he growls, "I wasn't on it, but the person who was, well, he didn't fare any better then the bike." Leaning closer to Scott, he grounds out in a low warning, "Now let it go at that." Turning his back on the seething man, Logan walks to the mansion, his mind focusing on more important matters. Like finding Rogue.
Rogue stood at the door of Professor Xavier's office, hand raised to knock when she heard a voice, 'Come in Rogue.' Despite her anguish, she can't help a small smile escape at his welcome. Entering the large office, Rogue stands before the desk, looking at the kind face of the Professor when the dam breaks. The kindness that this man has shown her is overwhelming and the emotional events of the last hour come crashing down on her. Collapsing into one of the large leather seats at his desk, Rogue struggles to get ahold of her emotions, knowing that he is waiting for her to speak. Finally clamping her teeth down on her lower lip she looks up at him, slightly embarrassed by her outburst. "Sir, I'm sorry for that, I just.... I ...." She thrusts the crumpled letter in her hands toward him. "I got this today."
Xavier reaches forward and takes the paper, smoothing it out so he can read it. Sorrow fills his eyes as he looks up at Rogue. "I am so sorry for you Rogue, if there is anything I or anyone here can help you with, please tell me. Are you going to return to Mississippi to see your Mother?"
Rogue looks down and shrugs slightly, "I don't know, Sir. I... I feel I need to but I'm scared." Her hands begin to tremble again and she stuffs them under her legs, trapping them against the seat. "My Father, he was very angry when they found out about...." Her voice fades off and she shrugs again.
"Rogue, you know deep inside you want to go, I think you should. It is the only way you can put your past to rest. You need to..." He is interrupted when the door flings open and slams shut violently.
Logan had asked everyone he saw on the school grounds about Rogue and no one seemed to know where she was. Growing increasingly impatient, he stalks to the Professor's office and bursts through the door, a demand to Rogue's location dying on his lips when he sees her. His forward momentum is halted at the sight of her. She's matured into a lovely woman in the years he's been gone but he notices a definite sadness about her right now.
"Hello Logan, I see you've returned safely." Xavier smiles a welcome to him, seemingly undisturbed by the interruption. He manuvers his chair around the desk and pauses beside Rogue, leaning over to place a hand on her shoulder, "Rogue, just go with what is in your heart." He straightens and nods at Logan on his way out. Exiting the room he sends a thought out to Logan, 'She needs you right now.'
Closing the door, Logan slowly walks to where Rogue is still sitting. She hadn't looked up at him when he came in and he was worried. 'What is wrong?' he wonders as he sits down beside her. "Hey kid." He whispers. Rogue finally looks up at him and he's shocked to see her red rimmed eyes and tear stained face. Moving his chair closer to hers, he rests his hand on her shoulder. "What's wrong, Rogue?"
She swallows painfully around the lump in her throat and whispers, "I have to go back home. My Momma is dyin'." Closing her eyes, she leans forward to rest her head on her knees and stifles back a sob. With a low groan, Logan pulls her up into his lap and cradles her close to his chest. Stroking her back with a large hand, his touch soothing as she sniffles and whispers, "I'm scared to go back Logan, what are they going to say if I show up?"
Rocking her gently side to side, he whispers against her hair, "I dunno, but I'll be there with you. I'm not leaving you out of my sight again. I made a promise and I've come back to keep that promise. If you'll let me."
'Oh. My. God. Logan's back.' Rogue didn't know how to react. With the devastation of the events from the past hour, she was too strung out and emotionally exhausted to do anything except cry. Sniffling against his chest, she cries herself to sleep, her sobs subsiding to whimpers and an occasional shudder.
Realizing that she is quiet, Logan gazes down at her face and smiles sadly to himself. Her damp lashes lay in a gentle curve on her high cheekbones, her creamy skin blotchy from crying. Just barely resisting the urge to wipe the tears from her cheeks, he sighs and gathering her close, he stands with her. Walking softly, he carries her from the office and up to her room. It was one of the first places he had checked when he was looking for her, Jean having told him where it was. Entering her room quietly, he eases her down onto the bed as gently as possible and pulls a blanket over her when she curls up on her side. Carefully brushing her hair behind her ear, avoiding her skin, he whispers softly, "I promised I'd come back to you."
"This is your captain speaking, please fasten your seatbelts and put your tray in their full, upright position. We are preparing to land. Thank you for choosing American Airlines." Sighing, Rogue sits up and smiles tightly at Logan who is sitting beside her. "Looks like this is it..."
He reaches over and takes her gloved hand in his, "You'll be ok, Rogue." He nods and looks out the window as the plane makes it's descent to the ground. Thinking about the events that lay ahead of them. He's never met Marie's parents and yet he can't help but feel anger toward them. They threw away a bright, beautiful, loving child, their child, because of something she had no control over. He was angry for the damage they did to her soul and yet he is thankful as well. If it weren't for their disregard for their daughter, he would have never met her. He knew that the woman-child he met those years ago saved him. Saved his soul and made him a whole person. He would always be thankful for her coming into his life. The jolt of the plane touching down snaps his attention back to the present and he smiles at Rogue reassuringly. "Are you ready?"
Rogue shrugs in return and whispers, "I guess." Her stomach is doing flips flops and she desperately wants to throw up but instead she squeezes his hand and makes a nervous attempt to smile. Gathering up her carry on bag and his, they exit the plane and head into the lion's pit.
The white sterile walls of the hospital combined with the smell of disinfectant and sickness cause the pounding in Rogue's head to increase and she tightens her hold on Logan's hand. They had asked for her Mother's room number when they arrived and the dread of what they might find was weighing on her mind. Just as they rounded the corner to her room, her Father stepped out into the hall. He looked worn and tired, as though his world were coming to an end. Or had just ended. Rogue stumbled slightly and gasped, "Dad..." Her Father looked up, anger quickly registering on his face as he stiffened his spine and fire flashed from his eyes.
"What are you doing here?" His voice is low and furious as he spat out the words. "I told you to never come back here, you... you...freak."
Rogue stopped short, her body swaying from the pain his words inflict on her. Logan growls low in his throat, flexing his hands in an attempt to keep from tearing him apart. Rogue swallows painfully and whispers, "How is Momma?" Her body begins to tremble, partly from fear and hurt at her Father's words.
A flash of pain crosses the man's face and he is silent for a moment. Mentally shaking himself, he glares up at Rogue and sneers, "She's dead. She died a few moments ago. The service is tomorrow at noon, come if you must, but I expect you to be gone by nightfall." Turning sharply on his heel, he stalks away from a pale, shaken Rogue.
Logan snakes his arm around her waist to keep her on her feet. Pulling her close to him, he whispers in her ear, "What do you want to do?" The anger courses though his body like lava, it's all he can do to keep from chasing him down and shredding his body like he shredded his daughter's heart. Rogue shrugs and whispers back through her tears, "I need to say good-bye to her." With Logan holding her steady, she enters her Mom's hospital room and steps closer to the bed. Her Mother looked so thin and pale, but her face was calm and serene. Whatever pain she might have been in was over now and she looked so peaceful. Rogue reached out with a trembling hand and grazed her fingers over her Mom's cheek. Tears slipped down her face and dotted the stark white sheet that covered the lifeless body on the bed. Bending down, she placed a light kiss on her Momma's forehead and whispered sadly, "Good-bye Momma, I love you." Turning to Logan, she fought to gain control of her tears and murmured, "I need to get out of here." He guided her from the room and helped her into the taxi that whisked them back to the motel.
Unlocking the door to their room, Logan leads her to the bed and pulls back the covers so she can lay down. Curling up in a ball on her side, she raises her head to look at him and asks, "Would you lay with me?" Unable to resist her anything, Logan shucks off his shoes and stretches out on his side behind her, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her close to him. Rogue snuggles closer to him, burrowing her head in the pillow and closes her eyes as the tears start to slip down her cheeks. Shuddering with the sobs, she bites her lip in an effort to keep from crying out but it's a failed effort and she begins to cry harder. Tightening his hold on her, Logan wraps his arm up around her chest and whispers in her hair, trying to soothe her with his voice. It breaks his heart, all this crying, but he knows that she needs to cry, needs to grieve or it will eat her up inside.
Rogue sobs from the pain of her heart breaking. The pressure inside her wells up and just explodes from her until she is nearly choking from the agony. She's so sick of crying but she can't seem to help it. Everything is crashing down on her and if it weren't for Logan, she'd be crazy from the torture of it all. 'Momma... Momma.... I'm so sorry.' She knew that her Momma loved her but that her Father wouldn't allow her to stay. She had to leave, her Momma couldn't protect her nor would she defend her. The feeling of abandonment crushed her soul and she cried until her body was drained and finally she slept. A deep, dark, dreamless sleep.
Dressed in black silk with a sheer black scarf around her neck and black silk gloves that reached up past her elbows, Rogue sat quietly in the house she has left behind all those years ago. Her Mother's wishes were for her to be cremated and no actual funeral, so the wake was held in the house with only a few close friends and family. Needing to face this particular demon alone, Rogue had asked Logan not to come with her. She knew her Father's reaction to mutants and she didn't want to cause a scene. After a lengthy discussion, she had persuaded Logan to bring a taxi to pick her up in a few hours. People were starting to leave and Rogue couldn't help but notice how they treated her with wary disdain. Whispers and stares had followed her the entire time and it was all she could do not to start screaming at them. She had snuck up to her old room once and was heartbroken to find all of her belongings gone. It was as though she had never lived there. Stifling a sob, she had returned downstairs to the small crowd of strangers. Strangers that she had known her entire life.
Looking up from her thoughts, she noticed that everyone was gone. She stood up, walked to the window and peeked out. 'Where are you Logan?' Turning around, she gave a small jump and shriek to find her Father standing close behind her, the strong stench of bourbon on his breath. She backed up against the wall, her body pressed flat as she tried to avoid him. "What are you doing Daddy?" The fear in her voice angered her but she felt so powerless.
Leering down at her shaking form, her Father stepped closer and sneered, "You little bitch, you killed her. She couldn't bear the idea that she had birthed a monster, a freak, and it killed her. You should have died at birth, or better yet, never been born." Taking a long swallow from the bottle of amber liquid, he looked down at her, "You are no blood of mine, I want you out of this house and I don't ever want to see you again."
Standing up straight, her anger over riding her fear of this man, she spat out, "My Mother loved me, it was YOU who couldn't handle the truth about me!" Rearing back, her Father swung his arm back and connected with the side of Rogue's head with his fist. Her head recoiled and bounced off of the wall, her mind blacking out as her body slumped to the floor. His rage consuming him, he began to kick and beat her limp body, screaming at her for everything that had gone wrong in his life. He crouched down over her body and began to pummel her chest and stomach when he was suddenly yanked from the floor and sent sailing across the room to crunch against the far wall.
After waiting in the taxi for a few moments, Logan jogged up the sidewalk to the front door. When Rogue didn't come out immediately, he knew something was wrong and as soon as he heard screaming and fists meeting flesh, he burst through the door like the hounds of Hell. Seeing Rogue's limp body on the floor with her Father beating her senseless, his blood had begun to boil through his veins and in a burning red haze of fury, he had picked him up by his neck and flung him across the room like a rag doll. Dropping to his knees beside Rogue, he watched her intently for any sign of life, her breathing was barely visible and he gently touched his hand to her chest, hoping against hope that her heart was still beating. Feeling the thin, thready pulse through her breastbone, he gave a sigh of relief and turned back to the cowering man across the room. A deadly glitter in his eyes, his lips twisted in a parody of a smile, he stood towering over the man and growled, "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you right now."
With the bourbon pumping through his blood and fury blinding his common sense, the drunken man lunged up from the floor, the bottle clenched in his upraised fist. With a sharp 'Shink!' the man found himself impaled through the neck and pinned up against the wall like a bug on display. Fear shone in his eyes for the first time and he tried to swallow against the pressure in his throat, the blood running down his windpipe into his lungs. Looking up at the man before him, his face mere inches from his own, he looked into those deep brown eyes and saw something that shook his soul. Primal, animalistic bloodlust mixed with a rage and hate so intense, he thought he was looking into the eyes of Satan himself. He knew he was going to die and he closed his eyes against the vision before him.
"The extent of damage done to her brain cannot be determined until she regains conscienseness. The blows she sustained to her head caused swelling in her brain and has kept her comatose." Jean looks into the somber faces of Logan and Xavier as she reports her findings. Xavier is his usual calm and composed self but Jean can see the pain in his eyes. Logan is the very picture of devastation. Pain radiates from him in waves so strong it's all she can do to block the mental screaming.
"Just when should be wake up? She won't be like this forever will she?" Logan shifts in the chair as she looks down at him in a mixture of pity and pain. He hates seeing that. The pity, he doesn't need anyone's pity, he just needs Marie to wake up and smile at him in the sweet way of hers and speak to him again. He doesn't even think about what he will say when she wakes up, "Honey, I killed your Father, you see, he beat the shit out of you and almost killed you." He can still see the fear in the man's eyes when he realized he was going to die and it gave him a small measure of satisfaction that the man was afraid in his final moments. Shaking his head slightly, he looks up when he realizes Jean is talking to him.
Jean fights to contain her tears before she answers him softly, "Logan, we have no way of knowing. She could wake up today or 10 years from now." Her chin starts to tremble and she turns away from them, "Excuse me." and runs from the room.
Logan looks at the professor and mutters something about needing fresh air. Leaving the office he heads out of the mansion and begins to run. Runs through the gates and into the woods until he ends up at the top of a cliff that overhangs the ocean. His chest heaving, lungs and muscles burning from the strain, he doubles over, hands braced on his knees as he gasps for air, unaware of the tears that stream down his face. "Marie." Her name slips past his lips in a whisper or a prayer, he's not sure. He hasn't prayed for anything in his life, that he can remember anyway but now he'd sell his soul to the devil if he thought it would bring Marie back. Sinking to his knees, he looks over the edge of the cliff down to the crashing waves below. The waves crest and break on the rocks, sending tiny white flecks everywhere. His heart feels like those waves, being shattered against the rocks as it breaks at the thought of losing Marie forever. "Oh God..." he groans and buries his head in his hands as he sobs out her name over and over. His broad shoulders shake from the strain and harsh gasps echo off the cliff. Rising up on his knees, he throws his head back and a raw scream rips it's way up his chest and through his throat. Eyes clenched tight with tears streaming, veins pop from his neck and shoulders as he screams his pain to the world. The scream dies as his body collapses to the ground, the sound carrying across the water and into the trees behind him. Woodland animals pause in their routine at what sounds like the cry of an injured animal and then scurry away.
Several hours later a subdued and exhausted Logan enters the mansion and makes his way to Marie's room. Casting off his clothes he crawls into the shower and stands under the burning hot water. Grabbing a bar of soap that smells like her, he breathes in the scent before scrubbing it over his skin, washing away the grime and sweat. Rinsing the last of the soap from his skin, he shuts off the water and grabs a towel from the rack, drying himself until his skin is red and burning from the friction. Tossing the towel into a basket, he enters her room and stretches out on the bed, his naked flesh wrapped in cool sheets that smell faintly of her. That's why he chose to come here, so he could be surrounded by her smell. He wished he could be with her until she woke up, but he knew that he couldn't stand by her every moment, seeing her slight body lay motionless on the bed, never knowing if she would wake up.
With a huge yawn he closes his eyes and the image of her face swims across his mind as he drifts off to sleep.
Approaching her bed noiselessly, he stands beside her, looking down. Her normally creamy skin is pale and pasty, almost as if it isn't real. Only very slightest rise and fall of her chest tells him that she is alive. Reaching out with a shaking hand he runs his fingers over her hair gently before trailing them down over her face with only a particle of air separating his skin from hers. Closing his eyes, his head drops down as he lets his hand fall to her face, waiting for the moment when she would draw his healing power into herself. A shattered sob breaks free when nothing happens and he brings his other hand down to cup her face as his own crumples in agony.
"No no no nonononono....." a keening cry turns into a wail which then transforms into an all out scream, one that only comes from the destruction of ones mind. As the scream died and it's echo turned to nothingness, she took a sudden gasp and with a sigh her chest stopped moving. Stopped the gentle up and down rhythm that kept him hoping for her to wake up. Tearing away the wires and slinging the machines to the floor, he picked up her lifeless body and carried her out of the mansion that was their home and into the forest. Holding the slight body tightly to him as if it were more precious then anything, he picks his way through the woods taking care that none of the branches scraped against her face as tears slid down his own.
Finally, at the edge of a cliff he stops. This is the place, the same spot where he had screamed out his agony at the world. Where he admitted to himself and the world that she was his world and if she died, he would too. Clutching her tight, he knelt on the ground and rocked her body back and forth, much like a mother would to soothe a frightened child. Murmuring unintelligible words to himself and her, he placed reverent kisses across her face, along her cheek and over her forehead.
"I love you, my Marie." He speaks to her in a suddenly clear and coherent voice as he stands up. Pressing a gentle kiss to her lips he steps off the edge of the cliff with his arms wrapped tightly around her.
With a primal scream Logan jerked awake and found himself wrapped so tightly in the sheets that he couldn't move. A flick of his wrist and a definite metallic sound later, and he's laying in bed with ribbons of what was formally a sheet. Closing his eyes, he drags his hand over his face, groaning as the remains of the dream haunt the edges of his mind. 'Marie.' Leaping out of the bed, he flips on a light and spies a large pair of sweat pants draped across the back of a chair. Pulling them on, he marvels that they fit until he realizes they are his. His. She had kept them, but when had she taken them? Pushing that tidbit of information to the back of his mind, he leaves the room and goes to her.
As he draws close to her bed, he notices how pale she is and the thought stops him in his tracks. Hoping against hope that his dreams aren't suddenly prophetic, he sits down in the chair next to her bed. Finding her hand under the sheet, he grasps it in his, rubbing his thumb over her wrist as he talks to her.
"Marie, I don't know if you can hear me. Some people say you can, others claim you can't. I think I'll sit here awhile on the off chance that you can. I don't want you getting lonely down here all by yourself." He pauses to watch her for any sign that she's heard. When none is forthcoming, he sighs and continues. "Do you know what you've done to me? Honey, you've taken such total control over me and I doubt if you even know it. You've tamed the beast, claimed the prize trophy. Whatever you want to call it. I belong to you and if you die, I don't know what the hell I'm gonna do. Probably go back to cage fighting... or I might kill off my human side and just wander the woods like the animal I am. No matter what happens to me and you, I'll always have you in my head, in my soul. If someone were to ask me about my life, I would tell them that it's all a burning red haze in my head except the one piece that is you. You became my life somewhere between the time I found you hitching a ride in my trailer and the moment I ran my claws through your chest. So you see, Hon, you can't die because I need you too much to live without you."
Sometime during his one sided conversation he had lain his head down on the bed beside her ribs and with a soft sigh, he fell into a deep and for once, dreamless sleep.
The first thing she was aware of was the low hum of some sort of machine. Struggling to swallow, she cracks an eyelid open and stares at the gleaming chrome walls of the room she was in. 'What the...?' Sitting up slightly, she sees a dark figure slumped over in a chair next to her bed, his head resting on the mattress beside her. Blinking sleep filled eyes, she coughs slightly and the man stirred. The thick brown hair on his head is unkempt and standing up at odd angles. Seeing that she's awake, he sits up suddenly and almost yells her name. "Marie!" She blinks at him and scoots to the opposite edge of her bed, staring at him with wide eyes as she croaks out, "Who... who are you?"
Logan actually heard his heart splinter open in the dead silence that followed her words. 'Oh sweet Jesus.' His jaw drops in response just before he bolts out of the room, the chair clattering to the ground as his booming voice echoes through the halls. "JEAN!!" Racing to the upper levels of the mansion, he bursts through the doors of Jean's office, his eyes wild and pain filled. Claws shot in and out of his hands at an amazing speed, his unconscience releasing them in response to the sudden amount of distress he was under.
Jean jerked out of her chair in surprise at his dramatic entrance and her mind drilled into his to find the cause of his panic. "Oh shit I was afraid of this." She ran past Logan and down the hall, not taking the time to see if he followed her or not, although it wouldn't take three guesses to figure out that he would. In fact she could hear him catching up to her at breakneck speed and it just urged her to hurry more. "When did she wake up?"
"Just now, goddamit, you knew this might happen?? Why the hell didn't you tell me?" Reaching the door to Marie's room, they paused and gathered their composure, well Jean did. Logan was another matter all together. As Jean reached out to open the door, he grabbed her arm and demanded, "Answer me Jean, WHY didn't you tell me she might not.... know me?" The pain this was causing him slipped into the open at these last words and Jean couldn't help but feel sorry for him. Laying her hand on his arm she whispered, "I didn't want to worry you any more then you already were. I'm sorry."
Turning from him, she enters the room and almost immediately returns. "What??" Logan asks fearfully at the look on her face. "What's wrong?"
"She's gone."
Two Years Later....
The rain poured down in sheets, the windshield wipers barely keeping up with the rainfall. The highway was nothing more then a lake now and the dark haired beauty cursed as she down shifted the truck, holding the wheel steady. Glancing at the moniter beside her, she saw the four horses in the trailer she was hauling shift to keep their balance. Reaching out her right hand, she grasps the arm of her traveling partner, "Crystal, wake up." Murmuring something unintelligable, Crystal rolls her head to the left and opens bleary eyes. "God, Ang, I'm so tired, what's the matter?"
Her brow furrowing in concentration, Angela gripped the wheel with both hands again. "Help me watch the road, I gotta find a place to pull over." Switching on her emergency flashers, she downshifts the truck again and crawls down the road. "At least there isn't any traff.... Shit!!!" A figure darted into the road in front of them. Punching the gearshifter into 2nd, she slams on the brakes at the same time and offers up an apology to the horses in the trailer. As if in slow motion, she saw the figure stop in the muted glare of her headlights, stand almost upright, and meet the blow of the truck head on. Try as she might, she couldn't keep from hitting it. The trailer swayed behind the truck, tossing the horses side to side. Vaguely she heard Crystal scream beside her.
Finally bringing the huge rig to a stop, she jumped out of the truck into the rain and approached the figure on the road. It appeared to be a man, nearly naked with long tangled hair and a full beard. He had hit the windshield, went over the top and hit the front of the gooseneck trailer to flip over the side of the truck and land on the pavement. Standing over him now, Ang could see that he was hurt badly. His body was bent in directions it wasn't meant to. Glancing up, she sees that Crystal is standing beside her, nearly hysterical, "Oh my God, what are we going to do?? We've killed him!!"
Ang bends down and sees that he is still breathing. "Crys, help me, he's alive. We gotta get him off the road. Grab his ankles." Looping her arms under his shoulders, she straightens her legs and lifts the man from the ground the only way they can. Carrying him carefully, given the circumstances, they get him to the rig and Crystal gingerly lowers his legs so she can open the door to the living quarters of the horse trailer. Manuvering him inside, they gently lay him on the bed and stand back, taking stock of the situation. The rain comes down even heavier and Crystal looks at Ang. "You stay here, I'm going to try to get the rig straightened out and on the shoulder. Are the emergency triangles still under the seat?" Ang nods, gazing at the man on the bed. "Be careful Crys, this storm is just getting worse."
Crystal slams the door shut and Ang rummages around, looking for some extra blankets. Looking down at the man, she contemplates on what to do about his soaked pants. They look like some the Incredible Hulk would wear. Shrugging her shoulders, she grabs a pair of scissors and cuts their remains from his body. As she dries him off with a towel, she notices that he doesn't seem to be hurt as badly as she first thought and is relieved to see him breathing steadily. She spreads several large blankets over his naked body and sits on the edge of the bed as she waits for Crystal to find a place to park. Studying his face, she finds him very handsome if in dire need of a razor and shower. Hesitantly she brings her hand up and lets her fingertips glide through his hair. It's thick and tangled but silky in an odd way. With a blinding white flash in her mind's eye, she has a brief sudden image of this very face awake and in pain. His eyes widened in fear and agony. Shaken at the image that was gone before she realized it, she stands up quickly and falls against the wall as the rig came to a halt. Snapping the door open she runs out into the rain to help Crystal set up the orange emergency triangles on the road. They didn't need anyone running into them from behind.
The two woman fell into the trailer wet and freezing cold. What greeted their eyes shocked them into forgetting their discomfort. The man was awake and standing in the middle of the trailer stark naked. Their less then graceful entrance had him spinning towards them as three gleaming steel claws popped from his knuckles. Crystal fainted on the spot, crumpling to the floor and Angela shrank back against the door screaming. Her hand behind her back struggling to pop the latch on the door. She cried in terror when her hand slipped and she accidentally locked the door instead. Turning around in desperation she jerked at the lock and was almost home free when she felt a hand on her shoulder and warm breath grazing her ear. "Marie?"
"Marie?" The name, the voice, it all echoed in her head with the force of a live symphony. Closing her eyes and leaning her head against the door another image flashed behind her eyelids. It was him, caught in the prison of a nitemare as she came to try and comfort him. She sees him come awake with a scream and drive those claws through her chest. Her body jerks at the image and she whispers against the door. "Who are you?"
"It's me Marie, it's Logan." Gently pulling her around to face him, he looks down at her with pain etched across his features. "I've been looking for you for over two years." Watching her face, looking for any sign of recognition, he watches as a million different emotions flicker across her face. He wants nothing more then to drag her against his body and never let go but he knows he can't. She doesn't know him. The pain that thought causes nearly kills him.
A flood of images race through the girl's mind and she shakes her head, confused and frightened. "No no, my name is Angela, I train and show horses. I... I...." With a soft sob, she buries her head in her hands and sinks to the floor. Crystal slowly comes to beside her and stares up at the naked man before them. "Ummm... if you aren't going to kill us, would you at least cover yourself?" Glancing up at her sobbing friend, she sits up against the wall and glares at him, "What did you do to her?"
Logan snatches a blanket from the bed and wraps it around his waist. "Who are you? Why does she think her name is Angela?" Sitting down on the floor in front of them,he doesn't want her leave his sight ever again.
Crystal shrugs and sighs, "Well, when I found her she was sneaking around my barn and stealing food from the spare fridge in the barn office. She was scared, dirty and couldn't tell me anything about herself. She had this shocking white lock of hair too. Anyway, I felt sorry for her and since she showed that she had a real knack with horses, I let her stay. I asked how she knew so much and she didn't know. That was almost two years ago and now we are partners in a training and showing stable." Frowning at him, she demands, "Now just who the hell are you??"
With a low growl he meets her eyes with his red rimmed ones, "I'm her mate. I've been searching for her for over two years. Now that I've found her, I'm never letting her go." He settles back against the wall behind him and crosses his arms over his bare chest.
"Whoa now buster, what if she doesn't want to stay with you? Why was she running in the first place?" Wrapping a protective arm over her friend's shoulders, she challenges him. Angela/Marie had stopped crying and was sitting silently in the corner, her shoulders slouched as she tried to hide under Crystal's arm. Peeking up through her hair, she met Logan's eyes and whispered, "I was hurt."
Piercing her with his dark eyes, Logan whispered, "You remember?" Leaning forward, he half crawls to where she sat and grasped her shoulders. "You know who I am?" Desperation was building in his heart and he didn't know if he was going to cry or scream. For the past two years he had searched every bar, town, hovel, cave he could find, desperate to find her. He needed her, she held his heart in her hands and he was dying more each day that he didn't find her. Now she was here, in front of him, he couldn't believe it and he was damned if she would leave his line of sight ever again.
Nodding slightly, she sits up and faces him. "I think so, you're Logan... Wolverine. A.. a mutant." At Crystal's small gasp, she reached up with her hand to touch his face. When he drew back slightly, she was confused, even hurt. "Are you afraid of me?" He frowned at her and sat back. "Let me see your hand." Reaching out, he hesitantly grasps her hand in his and closes his eyes at the same time. Waiting for the familiar pull, the dragging of his life into her. It never came. Dropping her hand like a hot stone, he stands up. "You aren't Marie!! My Marie is a mutant! She can't touch me, she can't touch anyone!!" Anger and disappointment well up inside him like an erupting volcano and he's afraid he's going to shame himself by crying. He was so sure it was her, he couldn't believe that fate would play such a cruel trick on him again. "God dammit!" Three long claws snap from his knuckles and he swings his arm through the air in anger.
Crystal reaches up slowly and snaps the lock open on the door and the two women fall out onto the ground. The rain had finally stopped and the moon shone brightly in the starlit sky. Pushing themselves to their feet, Crystal took off at a dead run but Angela stopped and looked back at the broken man in their trailer. His was sitting on the bed now, his head in his hands, shoulders shaking as though he were crying. A wave of compassion sweeps through her and she goes back to him. Standing beside him, she lays a small hand on his shoulder. Jerking upright, he glares up at her and the look in his eyes tears her heart out. Sitting beside him on the bed, she whispers, "Are you sure I'm not her?"
Wiping his hand across his wet face, he nods, "Yeah I'm sure. If you were her, touching me would have killed me." Sitting there, slouched down with his head bowed, she ran her hand down his arm to rest on his own large hand. "Tell me about her, what happened to her?"
"Her Father beat her to the point of putting her in a coma. When she finally woke up, she didn't know who I was or who she was. She disappeared. I've been searching for her ever since." Looking down to where her hand was resting on his, he stared at it for a long time. "God I was so sure... so sure you were her." his voice shook with the effort to control his emotions.
Clenching her eyes shut, her hand came up to steady her forehead as another image flashed across her mind. Opening her eyes a moment later, she looks at him and stands up. "I have something for you." Crossing to the small set of drawers built into the wall, she pulls the top on open and takes out a small handmade, leather and hemp bag. Returning to sit beside him, she takes his hand and pours the contents out into his palm. A silver chain with a piece of steel fell out, the word "Wolverine" stamped on the side, staring up at him.
Two Months Later....
"C'mon you big chicken, it's just a horse!" Marie wrapped her small hand around his wrist and tugged without much effect. "No way am I going to subject myself to that. No way, no how." Logan planted his feet and refused to budge. She could pull all she wanted, wasn't no way he was moving. Nothing was going to change his mind either. Oh wait a minute... what's this?
Marie purses her lips and narrows her eyes, her hands planted on her hips as she looks him up and down for a long moment. "What??!" He asks. He doesn't like the look in her eye and begins to wonder what she's up to. Standing before him, she leans close and whispers in his ear. The things she says, oh my, they could have made a sailor blush. Drawing back, he gawks at her for a moment before he could find his voice. "Where did you learn that?"
Smiling up at him in a demure fashion she sings, "Ask me no secrets, I'll tell you no lies." Flipping her long hair behind her shoulder, she walks away, her ass hypnotizing him as it sways back and forth. "Dammit Marie, how do you talk me into these things?!??" Stalking after her, he mutters something to himself about not having any balls.
He enters the barn to find Marie already has a horse out and bridled. "What no saddle?" He asks, "Are you crazy?" Laughing lightly, she replies, "Oh I think you'll like this better.... much better." She turns and pulls herself up on the horse's back and manuvers the horse over to him. "Come on, swing up here." Grumbling and snarling about driving by committee, he half jumps, half swings his leg over and manages to land behind her on the horse without killing them all. Straightening his legs out, he wiggles around until he finds a comfortable way to sit and he finds himself with her ass snuggled up to the front of his rapidly swelling bulge. 'Oh God' he groans to himself, 'I'm gonna die.'
Grasping her hips in his hands, he pulls her tighter against him and smiles when she whimpers in her throat. This wasn't going to be so bad after all. "C'mon Marie, let's go riding." He sounds oddly gleeful. When the horse started to move, it rocked their hips together in the most amazing way and he nearly burst into flames right then and there. His fingers dug into her hips and he gritted his teeth to control himself. This was the sweetest sort of torture and he wasn't going to give it up. Since they had figured out that she was indeed his Marie, he had shipped her to the school to have Jean examine her. It was discovered that the trauma to her brain from the beating her Father gave her had damaged the part of her brain that activates her mutation effect. So, for all intents and purposes, she was no longer a mutant. The news had both elated and frightened Logan. He could finally touch her, but he wasn't sure she wanted him to. They had settled into an easy friendship but she wasn't his Marie, she had lost a large part of her past, much like he had, and was no longer the same person. These past few months had been a learning period, they had spent huge amounts of time together and Logan was falling in love with her all over again. Marie's mind was slowly filling in the holes in her memory although she had no memory of what her Father had done to her. It had broken his heart to have to tell her that her Mother was dead and that he had killed her Father. She had cried in his arms that night and he thought he was going to die. Speaking of dying, the horse was suddenly going faster and the pressure against his groin increased considerably. Leaning forward, he growled in her ear, "Marie, stop the horse."
Laughing lightly, she tossed back, "What's wrong Logan? Are you scared?" 'Oh in more ways then one', he thought. Leaning over the horse's neck, she urges him faster and gasps when she feels Logan lean over her and grasp the reins from her hand. He pulls the horse's head around to the side until the animal came to a stop and he braces his head against her back. His other hand cupping her groin as he pulls her back against him, rocking his hips forward at the same time. A low groan rumbles up from his chest, "God Marie..." Sliding to the ground he pulls her down with him and hauls her up against his chest. Brushing her hair back from her face, he gazes down into her upturned face and lowers his mouth to hers. His lips gentle but demanding, soft but unyielding. Brushing his tongue over her lips, he coaxes her to let him in and with a groan she accepts. Sweeping his tongue through her mouth, it tangles with her own and grazes over her teeth. His hands have already unbuttoned and slipped her shirt from her shoulders, fingertips teasing and pinching her nipples until they pucker and throb from the attention. Marie gasps in his mouth when she feels him unfasten her jeans and begin pushing them down her legs. Breaking the kiss to lean down and remove the boots and jeans from her feet, he looks up her body from his kneeling position and is awed by the sight of her. Legs that seem to go on for miles, the pale silky skin covering every inch of her. It made his blood boil and he thought he was going to come to a premature end right there in his jeans.
Running his hands up the back of her legs, he cups her ass and holds her steady as he nuzzles the dark curls between her legs. Drinking in the taste and scent of her, he strokes and touches her in ways she never dreamed possible. He feels the almost painful tugging of her hands clutching his hair but her moans make it all worth while. She's coming in gasps and moans and pitiful little whimpers that drive him on. Soon she is shuddering and quaking above him and he lowers her carefully to the ground, never removing his mouth from her sex. His lips grasp that nub of nerves as he flicks the tip of his tongue over it one last time and she screams him name when she finally shatters. Bucking her hips against his mouth, he increases the pressure slightly before backing off.
Sitting back to kneel above her, he grins as she finally comes back to earth. Jerking his t-shirt over his head, he starts to undo his jeans when her small hands stop him and she smiles shyly. "Let me." Leaning back, he braces himself on his hands, his hips arched up towards her as she leans forward to perform this task. With infinite slowness, she pulls the button apart and oh so slowly pulls the zipper down. With each millimeter, the pressure on his flesh decreases and he sighs in relief. When at last his fly is separated, he leans his head back and closes his eyes, trying to get a grip on himself. It was almost in vain though when he felt her hot little hands cup and caress his bare skin for the first time. His hips jerk at the first contact and just when he thought nothing could be better then this, it suddenly was. With a choked scream his hips lunge forward as her hot wet mouth surrounded him. One hand comes around to cup the back of her head as she begins a slow and somewhat unsteady rhythm. For a beginner, she learned awful fast. Too damn fast if the tightening and drawing in the pit of his stomach was any indication. His fingers twist in her hair and his hips give tiny little jerks into her mouth as her teeth graze him and her lips caress him. One hand is cupping his churning balls, rolling them around, and they tighten up as his cock swells to mammoth proportions in her mouth. "Marie, stop baby... oh please God... you have to... I'm gonna..." He looks down at her and sees by the look in her eyes that she knows what is about to happen and she wants it. Dear God, she wants it. Raising up on his knees, he brings his other hand around to hold her head steady and he begins to pump himself into her mouth, giving her as much as she can take. Her hands are all over him, one roaming up his chest to pinch and flick his nipples, the other between his legs, cupping his sack, her fingers teasing the sensitive skin behind them. With a shout, he gasps for air and lets out a scream so intense he thought his vocal chords were bring ripped out. Twice more he pumps into her mouth before he begins to jerk and spasm as he empties himself in her throat. He feels as though his very soul is being dragged from him and his fingers dig into her scalp as she works to swallow all he gives her. The rough/soft texture of her tongue causing his body to spasm and seizure.
Finally drained of everything, he sinks down to the ground, pulling her body over his. His arms wrap around her and he trails his fingertips slowly across her back and ribs. "My God Marie, I never expected... Did I hurt you?" He tilts his head down to look at her as she snuggles her face into his chest. "You didn't hurt me Sugar, I wanted you to lose control like that." Placing a soft kiss on his shoulder, she wriggled her hips against his. "When you've rested some, we'll have to have an encore ok?"
A harsh bark of laughter escapes him and he tightens his hold on her. "You are going to be the death of me girl, but I can't think of any better way to go."
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Thanks to my betas! I hope I fixed everything.... Never had anyone beta my fanfic before, won't ever go without one now! LOL There is explicit, graphically explained SEX at the end... you've been warned.