Editor's note: this series of emails and other correspondence come together to form a picture of life as a mutant in the past decades. One must realize that these persons were forming allegiances based solely upon the fact that they were mutants--mutants facing the (now defunct) Mutant Registration Act, as well as threats from fellow mutants. Xavier's school is now deservedly famous as an early haven for mutant humans, quite often runaways and other dwellers on the edge of society; these were not people who were known for their social skills to begin with.

We should not find it surprising that--especially in brief periods of relative calm, when the major mutant threat (Erik Lensherr, aka 'Magneto') and the main non-mutant threat (the MR Act and various shadow facilities linked to several major governments) were lying somewhat dormant, yet ever present like a sword of Damocles--these people should seek amusement amongst themselves. Having been treated cruelly by others, non-mutants (including family members) usually, that they would mirror such behavior is to be expected.

The editor hopes that this collection of documents will serve as a snapshot of the mutant mentality in those recent, turbulent times. For the sake of clarity, the correspondence has been arranged conversationally, rather than strictly chronologically.

Certain addresses and names have been deliberately obscured.

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 15th 13:46
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: Bored Now
----------

L,
I've grown tired of Scott--he bores me to death, really. Things just aren't the same when you're off on one of your jaunts. I have the most delightful amusement planned for us when you return; please do so quickly!
~J

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 15th 20:15
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: Re: Bored Now
----------

Jeannie, you mean to tell me Scooter finally wised up to your true nature and ditched you? Or did he just find someone younger? Don't forget, I know you better than anyone.

Got my own amusement lined up--but might cross paths with you soon anyway. Sooner, if you ask real nice... I seem to remember you were pretty damn good at that.
L

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 16th 07:09
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: Re: Re: Bored Now
----------

Logan. Once again, you have demonstrated your usual charming lack of charm.

Yes, Scott has had the unmitigated gall to 'ditch me' as you say--and not a moment too soon, in my opinion. He really was quite pedestrian in the bedroom. Not like you at all. However, it is an insult I can't allow to simply pass. Hence, the delightful amusement I've planned for you!

You see, Scott has decided he would like a younger woman this time; a young, *unspoiled* woman, to use his terminology. He even has one picked out--a student. He plans to approach her after graduation; have you ever heard anything more saccharine?

However, since he (like all men) cannot curb his baser desires in the interim, he has taken up with someone I believe you have more than a passing acquaintance with? In fact, I believe *she* only recently 'ditched' you. To compound the insult, they began their affair while they were *both* still attached to *us*!

I can imagine your face now, Logan. Yes, Ororo ditched you for Scott.

Are you interested in my amusement now? I promise it will destroy Scott, and possibly several others. I know it was your first and only experience as the wounded party, as Scott's leaving me was.

It is not a pain I welcome.

If you please me with my amusement, there may be further rewards...
~J

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 16th 22:55
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: amusement
----------
Jesus, Jean, it's just email--you don't have to sound like you're testifying before Congress or nothing.

Tell me what you have planned for that one eyed fucker.

L

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 17th 07:23
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: Re: amusement
----------
Ah--I knew you'd come around! You see, the girl Scott has picked out is quite an innocent. In fact, that is her chief appeal for him. I would like you to remedy that fact, as thoroughly as I know you can. When she goes to him, I want her to service him with all the skill of a completely debauched whore. And I want the entire mansion to know he's been made a fool of.

I think you might even like it--she's not without a certain pretty allure. Scott and Ororo will be out of the country on a recruiting mission for the next month or two, so you'll have plenty of time.

Let me know ASAP, Logan. I mean to see this through.

~J

PS: her name is 'Kitty'--doesn't that send your little Wolverine into an animal frenzy? Perhaps you can feed each other kibble while you talk dirty...

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 17th 14:31
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: Re: Re: amusement
----------
Jeannie, my 'little Wolverine' would go into a frenzy if you showed it some attention like you did back when I first met you leather geeks.

As much as I'd like to be of service, I do have my own project at the time. It will bring me back to the mansion, so maybe we'll see what happens, huh?

L

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 17th 21:58
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: Re: Re: Re: amusement
----------
Logan... I'll bite. What's your current project?

~J

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 18th 00:47
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: project
----------
I'm going to bag the Rogue. She's going to be staying at the mansion--guess Xavier's trying to recruit her.

L

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 18th 07:08
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: Re: project
----------
You've given me quite a laugh this morning! Really, the Rogue? The mutant who can kill with a touch and is utterly devoted to her comatose fiancé? I'll believe it when I see it.

I can't believe you'd pass on my little bon-bon for a pie in the sky.

~J

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 18th 10:13
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: Re: Re: project
----------
Wanna make a bet?

How's this: If I get her, I get you. We both win, eh baby?

L

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 18th 13:11
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: wager
----------
This could prove amusing, after all.

You have to provide proof. *Written* proof.

That done, I could be persuaded to agree to your proposition...

~J

---

----------
From: shadowcat@x...
Date: March 16th 12:34
To: cyclops@x...
Subject: Thank You!
----------
Oh, my God, Mr Summers--I totally love the earrings you gave me for graduation! They are perfect, exactly what I would've picked out :)

Have fun on your trip with Miss Munroe, and when you're in Russia, you should go to the Hermitage!

^_^ Kitty

---

----------
From: shadowcat@x...
Date: March 16th 12:42
To: jubilee@x...
Subject: I am freaking out!!!!
----------
OMG--Jubes!!!!

Scott gave me these totally gorgeous earrings for graduation--he put them on the nightstand in my room so I'd find them after he left ::swoon::

I just sent him an email that I spend about five hours composing. You know--trying to sound breezy but not stupid? hehe. I wrote the dumbest thing, though... I said that he should go to the Hermitage when he's in Russia (it's like this famous museum), and I completely forgot that he probably sees everything all red all the time, and maybe he doesn't like art museums and stuff like that with, you know, the being colorful and stuff. Argh! I am going to obsess over this for EVER!

When are you and Wolverine getting back? I can NOT believe you got to follow him around on his little trek down the yellow brick road this whole semester and call it "independent study." You are the master of BS, Jubes!

Unless... maybe you have a THING for him? I bet you do... Jubes and Wolverine, sittin' in a tree! hehe. I'm sure he has a THING for you, girl--maybe you should ask him for it! ;) OMG, I can't believe I wrote that! Bad Kitty!

Get back soon, ok?

^_~ Kitty

PS--is he really as hairy and mean and claw-having as people are saying? I only saw him that once in the dining hall over winter break... He seemed normal, except for the funny hair.

---

----------
From: jubilee@x...
Date: March 16th 16:20
To: shadowcat@x...
Subject: Re: I am freaking out!!!!
----------
Whoa, chica--calm down! I sooooo knew Mr Summers had it bad for you! Don't sweat the museum thing, I'm pretty sure he likes art and stuff, and if not, at least there'll be pictures of naked people, right?

We're actually heading back now, cos graduation is coming up and Wolvie's getting that itchy-gotta-get-laid look. I know, gross, right? I know WAAAAAAY more about the mating habits of the Wolvster than I ever wanted. Maybe I can work that into my independent study paper...?

I'm probably the only girl seventeen or over who's safe around him, cos of the whole life-saving thing. As in: he saved mine. It like, makes it so he thinks he has to be super careful and protective of me. Not sexual in any way, shape, or form. So even if I had a thing for older, hairier, meaner, claw-ier, no-memory guys, I'd be outta luck. That's probably why we get along so well--no ST, unresolved or otherwise! Of course, it really, REALLY puts a damper on my love life sometimes...

See ya soon,
Jubes

---

----------
From: shadowcat@x...
Date: March 17th 12:56
To: jubilee@x...
Subject: life-savage?!
----------
Jubes--he saved your life?? Oh, wow. I'd be like, crushing so hard! It's so romantic! Why didn't you tell me this last semester?

^_^ Kitty

---

----------
From: rogue@x...
Date: March 19th 09:02
To: xavier@x...
Subject: plans for tomorrow
----------
Professor,
thank you again for setting up this account for me. I should be arriving tomorrow in the morning, after I've checked on Remy at the hospital. I can't thank you enough for arranging the new doctor--he has several ideas that seem promising to me.

I understand Scott will be out of town while I'm staying with you; he was very kind to me when the incident happened, and I would like to hear from him. Please pass on my email address to him, if you would?

See you tomorrow,
Rogue

---

----------
From: xavier@x...
Date: March 19th 14:17
To: cyclops@x...
Subject: Our new addition (hopefully)
----------
Scott,
Rogue has asked me to give you her email address (unsurprisingly, it is rogue@x...). She mentioned that you had been kind to her after the unfortunate incident with her fiance. I don't have to tell you that I would very much like Rogue to feel comfortable with us. Please show her the utmost respect and kindness.

In other news, Logan and Jubilation are returning in three days. I know there has been some ill feelings between the two of you, but remember that we are trying to make a good impression on Rogue; do keep your arguments to yourselves, all right?

I do wish you and Ororo the best of luck (especially in Russia).

Xavier

---

----------
From: cyclops@x...
Date: March 19th 20:01
To: rogue@x...
Subject: life at the mansion
----------
Rogue,
I hope you will find the mansion a comfortable, safe place to be. I wish I could be there to welcome you, but the life of an X-Man is always on the move!

The Professor is going to try to recruit you for the team (you probably already knew that). If you're interested, it's a good life. Fun, exciting, and you get to use your 'gifts' (as the Professor calls them) for helping people. However, if you're not interested, don't let him push you.

He's told me that Logan (aka 'Wolverine') is coming back to the mansion after an extended mission. He'll be there at the same time as you are, and I'd like to take a minute to tell you about him--okay, to *warn* you about him. ha. He's pretty much a womanizer, who's worked his way through most of the adult female population at the school. He may seem appealing, but believe me, he'll do and say anything to get in your pants and then, when he's bored, drop you in an extremely humiliating manner. I've seen it happen more than once. In one instance, the girl left us and joined the Brotherhood!

He may be drawn to you as some sort of challenge, what with your mutation and so forth. Don't let him worm his way in.

I hope Remy is faring well,
Scott

---

----------
From: rogue@x...
Date: March 20th 15:46
To: cyclops@x...
Subject: Re: life at the mansion
----------
Scott,
Thank you for you email--I'm here and kind of settled in! My room is in the teacher's wing, near yours.

I'm not sure why you wrote all that stuff about this Wolverine person, since I wouldn't do anything with him even if he *was* the best thing since sliced bread. I'm engaged to Remy, and when he gets better, we're going to get married. He *is* doing a little better--the doctor that Professor Xavier arranged is trying some new treatment and he's responded well so far.

I want to thank you for everything you did after the whole Remy thing. I guess I went a little crazy. We were so careful, you know? It was just an accident, a silly, stupid accident. I should have been more careful. I'm really glad the Professor found us and sent you to get us, even if I acted angry because he used that brain-room thing and we didn't even know you guys yet. I'm sorry if I yelled at you then; I yelled at so many people I've just started apologizing randomly, figuring I'll be right 90% of the time!

Anyway, I met Dr Grey--she seems very nice and she gave me the grand tour. She even offered to consult with Remy's new doctor, so there's someone I know who can keep me up to date at all times.

The Professor didn't say anything about me joining the team, but I still got the feeling he might. I'll think about it, but until Remy's better, I can't commit to anything. I guess I'm having a hard time seeing how my 'gift' could be used to help anyone.

I met a few of the students, and I ended up getting a little weepy. I just wish I'd known about this place when I first changed. Maybe if I'd gone with my first instinct, after my parents kicked me out, you know, just hitched my way to Alaska, I might have met someone who knew about the school. Then again, if I hadn't gone to New Orleans I'd never have met Remy, and I can't imagine that now.

It's strange, isn't it? How all these tiny decisions we make without even thinking about them can change your future so much...

Tell Ororo I said hello,

Rogue

---

----------
From: xavier@x...
Date: March 21st 08:01
To: wolverine@x...
CC: jubilee@x...
Subject: Our new guest
----------
Hello to you both; I hope that you are well. You have probably heard there is a new guest at the mansion--Rogue. She has agreed to stay with us while her fiancé is undergoing a series of tests in the city.

As you may know, her mutation is extremely severe: her skin is poisonous to touch. It acts swiftly and surely. When she touches a mutant, she can take on their gifts. She has had no success in controlling it; I hope to remedy that, but she may have to be resigned to a life without touch. Her fiancé fell into a coma over three months ago when he accidentally came into contact with her skin during an intimate moment.

She is very sensitive about her mutation and I have promised that she will find the mansion to be a safe haven, where she can collect her thoughts and perhaps find some peace. I would ask that you (as well as all the residents) respect this.

To help her feel welcome, please do not badger her with questions about her mutation or her fiance (Jubilation, make a note), or otherwise discomfit her (Logan, I am quite serious about this).

You will find that she wears gloves almost all the time--it is perfectly safe to touch her through cloth, however, I have observed that she seems to be more comfortable if she is the one to initiate any touch contact.

Logan, Scott and Ororo are away on a mission and Jean will be leaving in the morning, taking Kitty and Bobby with her to Washington. This means you will bear some of the burden of representing the main team, both if trouble should arise, and to our guest. Please treat this responsibility with respect.

I look forward to seeing you both tomorrow,

Charles

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 21st 09:43
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: I'm beginning to think you've lost your mind. Again.
----------

Logan,
I've met your 'new project.' I honestly don't understand what your game is. My little Kitty is much more delectable!

Really. Have you even met Rogue before? She is mousy, meek, and, frankly, unsufferably boring. I peeked in her mind a little and all there is is insipid worry about her useless mutation and her brain-dead boyfriend. Personally, I have my doubts as to whether it was her skin that knocked him into the produce aisle, or her numbing personality.

She's so self-conscious about her mutation that I'm sure any man who had half a mind to could breach her practically virginal defenses. That's probably what happened with her vegetable boy; he thought he was getting the novelty of a night with her deadly skin, and ended up with an emotional leech. I don't think she's enough of a challenge for me to consider the terms of your wager.

I'm leaving tomorrow for Washington with the lovely Kitty and Bobby--hopefully he'll be able to pull off what you've passed on.

I swear, if you become interminably dull because of your ridiculous little game I may have to sever my acquaintance with you.

ta,
~J

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 22nd 10:31
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: Re: I'm beginning to think you've lost your mind. Again.
----------

I saw a picture of her.

My project is much more than just getting in her pants. I plan to get her body, sure, but it's her mind I'm really after. I want her to give herself to me--I want her to know she belongs to me. Then I'll know I've won.

Fuck it, it ain't your business anyway, except for the fact that I'm going to win our bet and then you'll belong to me, too. Again.

L

---

----------
From: rogue@x...
Date: March 23rd 23:55
To: cyclops@x...
Subject: settling in
----------

Scott,
I'm starting to feel more comfortable here. The Professor has been very sweet. Jean is also wonderful, but she's out of town right now with some students.

Logan has been different from what I expected, after what you wrote. He's been, well, nice. Someone must have told him not to try and shake my hand, or touch me when we're chatting. I met him this morning when I was out walking and we talked for a little about the X-Men, and Canada, and Alaska. He didn't make a pass at me, if you're worried.

He did tell me some about before y'all hooked up with him; he told me about fighting in cages. I might be wrong, but it seemed like he was kind of ashamed of that part of his life. Like maybe the X-Men saved him, a little, and he's too much of a badass to really admit it.

I also met Jubilee, who is sort of overwhelming.

I'm hopeful about Remy's new treatment, even though I know I shouldn't get too excited, too soon.

I kind of wish you and Ororo were here.

Rogue

---

----------
From: storm@x...
Date: March 24th 06:05
To: rogue@x...
Subject: be careful
----------
Rogue,
Scott has told me how you are settling in at the mansion. Something in your last email led him to give me your address. I understand that Logan is attempting to befriend you. Do not let him.

He is the worst kind of deceiver--he will seduce you before you even know it has happened. I know this, Rogue. I know it personally. He does not care for anyone but himself; while you are interesting, he shines on you like the sun. When he bores of you, you are shut off as though a dark cloud obscures you from the world.

People see him and think he fights with pure power and strength. They often forget that he is very smart; he uses any tactics he can to achieve victory, in battle, and in life. Don't doubt that he views you as a challenge (your skin alone would assure that), and will attempt to maneuver you into his trap.

He is the kind of person who always seeks a fight--in fact, I believe that is why he joined with us; he thought there'd be a fight always waiting in the wings. He creates his own battles when there are none in the real world.

Trust him with your life when you are fighting; do not trust him with anything else.

Scott tells me Remy may be improving--this gladdens my heart.

Ororo

---

----------
From: shadowcat@x...
Date: March 24th 10:33
To: jubilee@x...
Subject: my life is so complicated!
----------
Jubes!

OMG--Bobby is totally acting like he wants me. Maybe I'm imagining things, but he was all kinds of touchy-feely on the train ride down, and I think he was going to hold my hand but Dr Grey was right there.

I kind of like him, but I think I might be in love with Mr Summers--Scott (God, I can't even write his first name without blushing!). I know he's like a million years older than me and a teacher, and he probably thinks I'm just this little girl, but he *did* give me those earrings--they were really expensive ones, too! The age thing doesn't bother me, either. I mean, Buffy had sex with Angel on her seventeenth birthday and he was like 200, and nobody thought that was gross. Did I mention that I love Buffy? Like you couldn't tell by the fact that I own every single DVD. Of course, Angel did turn totally evil as a result of the sex, and there's the whole 'it's a TV show, not reality' thing, but that's not the point. I won't be a student for much longer...

Bobby is awfully cute, though, and there's no major problems with dating him...

^_^ Kitty

---

----------
From: rogue@x...
Date: March 24th 15:03
To: lori@xxxxx xxx
Subject: New York
----------
Lor...
I'm firmly ensconced in the Xavier mansion now. Remy is still the same, but I really have hope now, which is more than I could say before.

I miss you and the club--can you believe that? I got your package and I almost burst into tears right there in the foyer. I guess I'm still a little stressed out.

I've been doing a lot of thinking, and there are a few things I want you to know, just, well, just because.

I was thinking the other day about how all the little things we do, all the decisions we make, even things like what shampoo to buy, or where to get a cup of coffee, all these things put together make up our whole lives. Sure, there's big things, too, but there's a lot more little things than big things. If I hadn't taken that ride into New Orleans, I might have ended up in Alaska. I might never have met you or Remy...

Sometimes I think that might have been better--for him, at least. But I'm selfish. Even though things turned out like this, with him in the hospital, I don't want to give up having had him. You know that old story about the princess or the tiger? Like, which would you chose for the man you love, in the arena: the door with the beautiful princess and a long life without you behind it, or the door with the man-eating tiger behind it? Either way, you don't get your love. I guess I'd choose the tiger for Remy. Does that make me a bad person?

There's a man here, one of the teachers, and he's got me thinking about all this stuff. I don't know why. Maybe because he's Canadian, and I never got to make my grand trip through Canada!

I'm glad people like the single. That's another thing I'd probably never have done if I'd gone north. You got me to do that. I have some more stuff written, but I'm not sure if I'm ready to record right now, with Remy in the hospital. Maybe later.

I really like the CD you sent, is the band another one of your pet projects?

love you and miss you,
Rogue

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 25th 12:22
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: frustration
----------
Ugh. Bobby moves with the speed of a glacier. No pun intended. When we get back, you should offer him some pointers. Kitty would spread her legs for him in a second, if he made even the slightest advance. Instead, he insists on acting like she's made out of glass.

Where did you see a picture of your Pollyanna?

~J

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 25th 13:09
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: Re: frustration
----------
If you want the icicle to make a move, separate them. Send one of them back here.

Never mind where I saw the fucking picture.

L

---

----------
From: jubilee@x...
Date: March 25th 17:32
To: shadowcat@x...
Subject: Re: my life is so complicated!
----------
You know, there are worse things to happen than to be torn between two hotties!

There's a new resident here (ie, someone the Professor is trying to get on the team). She seems cool, and she has this whole tragic thing going. Her fiancé is all in a coma because of her mutation. Harsh.

She's also some kind of singer down in New Orleans. I saw her single in Wolvie's room, and he's not the type to be buying 'chick singers' as he says. It's a real live record with her picture on the cover and everything. She's standing in the rain and her hair's all wet, but she's smiling. The thing is, she has these white streaks in her hair now, but she doesn't in the picture. It's real mysterious.

Maybe she just dyed it, but I think the whole thing with her boyfriend made her hair turn white, like it was so traumatic or something. Totally tragic, chica! Can you even imagine? You're just trying to get a little busy with your boytoy and wham, he's out like a light...

see ya,
Jubes

---

[Excerpt from the New Orleans Music Weekly Express dated December 5th]

review, "Three" B/w "Little Touches"

...the best kept secret in New Orleans these days is a young Mississippi angel with the voice of a Louisiana devil. Calling herself "Rogue," she can be found performing at the same club in the Quarter she was waiting tables in not one year ago. Club Luna owner Lori de la Mer says she heard Rogue singing one of her songs at an open mic night and said, 'chere, you in the wrong business.' Not long after that, Rogue started singing instead of waiting.

Now a year later, Rogue has released a 7" on the local indie label Small Easy Records with an EP of a live performance due out next month. "Three," the A side of the single, is a burning meditation on the line between love and obsession. "I bear your mark," she sings, almost accusatorial in her tone. "but you don't see/ Baby, this ain't the way things are supposed to be." Her voice is a kudzu vine of longing that twists and winds its way into your soul as she sings of the three marks she bears--are they marks of past lovers, or something much more dark?

The B side features an unabashed love song, almost playful, that, together with "Three," showcases Rogue's versatility. Her voice bubbles with joy as she delineates all the little touches she bestows on her love.

---

----------
From: shadowcat@x...
Date: March 26th 06:10
To: jubilee@x...
Subject: tragedy!
----------
Argh! Dr Grey is sending me back to the mansion! She says I need to work on finishing my schoolwork, and since Bobby graduated last year he can stay and help her with her work. It's so unfair! I think I really like him.

He promised to email, though. Maybe he likes me, too?

I totally want to meet the new resident--a real live musician with a record and everything, wow!

See you in a few hours,

^_^ Kitty

---

----------
From: iceman@x...
Date: March 26th 07:30
To: shadowcat@x...
Subject: how's mansion life?
----------
Hey, Kitty... I just saw you off on the train and I already wanted to email you. I really liked talking with you last night. I hope we can get to know each other a little better when we get back home.

Bobby

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 26th 12:33
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: progress and your 'amusement'
----------
Jeannie. I've been making some progress on my project. She seems more comfortable around me than any of the other residents. I was out walking with her this morning and she put her hand on my arm voluntarily. May not seem like much, but for her it's big.

She said something that got me interested in your amusement. Apparently, someone has been warning her off of me, saying I'm some kind of sex maniac who'll try anything to get in her pants. She didn't say it exactly like that, but that's what she meant.

Summers is the only one who could be telling her that stuff. If you still need help with Kitty, I'll take care of it tonight while Rogue's at the hospital.

Luckily I've played it to my advantage with Rogue--I told her that might have been true in the past, but that kind of stuff was just empty now, that being friends with her was helping me understand that. That she was a good influence on me. I think she liked that.

L

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 26th 13:01
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: Re: progress and your 'amusement'
----------
Oh, my! She took your arm... how *sweet*. Maybe next she'll agree to go to the malt shop with you!

My God, I had to check the from line twice to make sure it was still you. If you don't make some real progress soon, I'll completely give up on you.

I'm sure Kitty could benefit from a visit from you, but I think you might benefit more.

J

---

----------
From: shadowcat@x...
Date: March 28th 11:09
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: help me
----------
Dr Grey,

I'm sorry to be writing you while you're so busy, but I can't talk to Jubilee about this. She's too close to *him*.

Something happened two nights ago. I-- I was going to bed, getting ready, when Wolverine--Logan--came in. I was surprised, because I'd never really spoken to him before. He started asking about Bobby and saying how he was his friend and he wanted to check out his potential girlfriends and make sure they were OK.

I said I wasn't seeing Bobby--not yet, and he asked why. I said I didn't know, and he said maybe I should make a move since Bobby really likes me but he's shy.

I said I didn't know how and that I was shy, too. Then he said--I can hardly type this--he said that maybe he could show me. Then he started touching my knee.

That's when I said I didn't know if I liked Bobby or Mr Summers, but I knew I didn't like him. He said "I think you do, a little," and he touched my knee some more. It was kind of hard to think, and I said I wanted him to leave, and he said he would if I gave him a kiss so I said I would.

I don't really know how it happened, but before I knew it he was kissing me and I couldn't help myself--he was making me do all these things and I couldn't stop.

He knocked on my door again last night, but I locked it and didn't answer.

Dr Grey, please help me. I don't know what to do. I feel like I've done something awful.

Kitty

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 28th 12:21
To: shadowcat@x...
Subject: Re: help me
----------
Kitty--did he force you? If he did, you must tell the Professor immediately.

Jean (please call me Jean)

---

----------
From: shadowcat@x...
Date: March 28th 12:44
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: Re: Re: help me
----------
No! No, he didn't--I just couldn't make myself stop. I didn't want it, but I couldn't stop because it felt so good, like I wanted it. Kitty

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 28th 13:09
To: shadowcat@x...
Subject: Re: Re: Re: help me
----------
Well, Kitty, this is something all together different. If you enjoyed it, why not accept that? Logan is... very masterful in some areas, and this is one of them. Think of yourself as quite a lucky girl.

Maybe you should let him teach you a few things, hm? Then, when you decide (if you decide--who says you have to?) between Bobby and Scott, you'll know you can please them in any way they might want, and be able to ask them for what you want. Wouldn't you like that?

Good luck,
Jean

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 28th 13:16
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: finally
----------
I understand you've finally shown some worth to me. I think you'll find the little kitten's door unlocked tonight.

Bobby is turning out to have his own charm. I'm remembering why I prefer younger men.
J

---

----------
From: shadowcat@x...
Date: March 29th 02:45
To: iceman@x...
Subject: missing you
----------
Bobby,
It's almost three in the morning and I haven't been able to sleep a wink. I've just tossed and turned all night. I really liked talking with you, too, and I'd love to know you better. A lot better. I think you'll find I'm different from what everyone thinks--I know that you are, as well. Maybe when you get back, we can spend some time together, just the two of us?

Kitty

---

----------
From: shadowcat@x...
Date: March 29th 10:15
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: lessons
----------
Jean,
Oh, my. I did as you suggested and Logan came to me last night and taught me lots of new stuff. I didn't know... Some of the stuff I thought was going to be dirty, but it didn't feel dirty. Like when he used his mouth... I thought that would be dirty. It wasn't. In fact, I think I liked that the best. He even said he'd help me with Bobby--we wrote an email to him last night. I put my laptop on him as a desk and just wrote it, all naked and everything. He wasn't very nice during breakfast, but I guess it would be weird if he started acting nice all of a sudden--what with the secrecy and all.

Are you and Bobby coming home soon?

Kitty

---

----------
From: rogue@x...
Date: March 29th 14:11
To: lori@xxxxx xxx
Subject: I miss you all
----------
Lor,
Remy is undergoing some intensive treatment right now and the doctor said he didn't think I should be around while they do it. I've been going to him every night for a few hours--this is the first night I won't see him.

I really miss him.

Everyone at the mansion is very nice, if strange. Logan (the Canadian teacher I told you about?) is the kindest right now. We often walk together in the morning and talk about this and that. It's cold up here, but I kind of like the brisk air, and I know he does (makes sense, him being Canadian). He's had a hard go of it, like most of the folks here, but he's come out pretty strong. He-- you know that story Alphonse told us about secret government labs doing experiments and stuff on mutants? Remember how we laughed and said he was hanging out at Leon's conspiracy bookstore too much?

Well, I guess he was right.

Logan was in one of those places, and they put all this metal in his body and gave him these claws that just pop out of his hands, right through the skin. You know dumb old me, queen of the obvious, I asked him if it hurt when they popped out (God, duh!), and (of course) he said it did, every time. I almost asked him to show them to me, but I didn't want to make him hurt just for my curiosity.

It kind of made me want to hug him a little, give him some kind of comfort. It's nice to feel that once in a while, rather than have every single person asking me how I'm doing, how I'm holding up all the time. It's nice to be the giver, now and then. I didn't, though. Hug him. I thought he might take it the wrong way. I wish I was as strong as he is, and I'd like to think of him as a friend.

I told him about when I changed, and how my parents reacted, and he got agitated and said he'd kick their butts if I wanted (only he didn't say butts). I told him about my big dream to travel all the way to Alaska, and he said I should still go there, if only to look at it and say I did it. Maybe I will.

This is what I've missed the most in the past few months--having someone to talk to about these things, the little things. I told Logan my theory about little decisions, and how they can affect your life as much or more than the big decisions.

He got real serious for a minute and said he thought I was right. He said what if he'd picked me up instead of that guy who took me into New Orleans? Maybe both our lives, and the lives of everyone we met between then and now would be different. He said he's regretted some of his big decisions, but if he started thinking about the little ones, he'd make himself crazy.

I started to feel a bit uncomfortable, since he was sitting really close and touching my hand. I started thinking maybe he wanted more than my friendship, which I just can't give, even if I wanted to. I don't, by the way. I really hope I'm just imagining things.

The moment passed, and we headed back for breakfast. He's usually kind of stern and unfriendly--in fact, I've only seen him smile once or twice--but today he was almost playful. He was making faces at one of the senior girls, sticking his tongue out at her and grinning. She didn't seem to like it, though, and she left.

love and hugs,
Rogue

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 30th 01:14
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: I see the whites of her eyes
----------
Jeannie, get ready to pay up. I have her. She'll belong to me before the end of the week.

Tonight she stayed at the mansion instead of going in to town and sitting with her man for hours like she usually does. After dinner, we went into the library and talked. Just usual stuff, about what she's thinking and how things are going.

Then she gets this look in her eye and tells me she wants to know if I'm having feelings for her--non-friend-like feelings. I have to think pretty carefully about this, because one bad move could put me back several turns. I decide to play it bold and say 'yeah, I do have more than friendly feelings for her.' She gets all alarmed and says how that can't ever happen, ever.

She don't know all about my mutation, though, and I can smell it on her. She's almost ready for me. The fact that she didn't just get up and leave pretty much clinches the deal.

I say how what I said the other day, about her being a good influence on me, on trying to be a better person, how that kind of made me look at her in the more than friends column. How maybe I want to be with a different kind of woman now.

She's still on alert and says how that's good, but I need to find someone that's not her.

I say I don't know if I can do that. I say maybe she's the only one, and what if I can't ever be good with anyone but her?

I know this kind of appeals to her.

Finally she gets up to leave and I grab her wrist and hold her gloved palm to my face, kissing it a little. If I didn't know it before, that sealed it. Her scent went through the roof. She runs off.

Later, about two hours ago, in fact, I'm taking a walk down the teacher's wing and notice her door's a little open. She's in there with her guitar and some headphones on, just playing away, singing softly. I push the door open and she stands up, shoving the headphones off.

Jeannie, I got to disagree with you on one point--mousy she ain't. She was wearing a pajama top and socks and, damn, she's got legs that go on forever. She doesn't say anything, just stands there with her guitar in one hand, looking at me.

I tell her what if what we're feeling is really love--who is she to deny it? I say I ain't ever felt anything like what I feel with her, and I got a feeling she ain't either. How can she turn her back on that? She wavers a bit, and then sets her guitar down and sits on the bed.

When I touch her, she starts crying, but she doesn't try to make me stop. In fact, she touches me a little, softly on my sideburns and hair. When I unbutton her top button, she's still crying and touching me and she says, real soft (I almost didn't hear it, so you know it was really quiet), "Forgive me."

I don't know what happened, Jeannie, but that got to me. Fuck, I couldn't do it then. I just kissed her on the top of her head and said, "I'm sorry," and left.

I'll have her tomorrow. She's ready and she won't deny me, and she knows it now.

Maybe I'll pay Kitty a visit before I go to sleep.

L

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 30th 06:48
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: Re: I see the whites of her eyes
----------
Let me get this straight: she was practically naked and willing in your arms, and you couldn't go through with it? My God, what have you become. I'm honestly ashamed to say I know you.

Keep the kitten amused for a little while longer, I'm really quite enjoying my Iceman.

J

---

----------
From: xavier@x...
Date: March 30th 07:21
To: cyclops@x...
CC: storm@x..., wolverine@x..., drgrey@x...
Subject: Rogue
----------
For some reason Rogue has decided she is no longer comfortable at the mansion. In fact, she has asked me to ask all of you not to contact her unless she contacts you first. Please respect her wishes.

I don't have to tell you that I am very disappointed. Scott and Ororo, you have been out of town and thus probably have few clues as to her motivations.

Logan, however, I would be very interested to hear what your interactions with Rogue have been like. I do hope you have not intimidated her.

Charles

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 30th 07:30
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: what's your plan now, lover?
----------
Are you going to follow her after she freshens the flowers in her boyfriend's room? Do you think you could get any more pathetic? The Wolverine I used to know would've 'bagged her and tagged her,' as I believe the expression goes, days ago. Maybe that's a little to close to home--what's the number on your tag, again?

Ooh. Did the bad doctoo say an owie? I sorry, baby.

J

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 30th 09:52
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: Re: what's your plan now, lover?
----------
She'll be mine tonight; you'll be mine tomorrow. I have something special planned for you.

L

---

----------
From: rogue@x...
Date: March 30th 12:59
To: storm@x...
Subject: you were right
----------
Ororo,
You were right about everything. I've been so foolish. Logan--he tried to do everything you said he would. For some reason he stopped himself--maybe it was to prolong the humiliation--and released me last night. I told the Professor that I couldn't stay at the mansion anymore and he gave me the keys to an apartment in the city. It's closer to the hospital anyway. I didn't tell him why, I just said I couldn't be there anymore. I left first thing in the morning and asked the Professor not to tell anyone where I am. I'm going to make arrangements to take Remy back to New Orleans. The Professor has offered to send Remy's new doctor along, and I think I'll take him up on that offer. Now is not the time to be too prideful, is it?

The worst thing is, if he comes to me, I know I'll be his.

Rogue

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 30th 14:02
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: the rules
----------
Don't forget that I'll require written documentation of the deed. I won't be flexible on this point.

J

---

----------
From: shadowcat@x...
Date: March 30th 15:19
To: iceman@x...
Subject: a mission
----------
Bobby,
The Professor's going to let me go on a mission! I'm really excited. He said that my 'gift' was uniquely suited for this situation. I know it's just a little intelligence gathering thing, but I'm looking forward to it. He's sending Jubes and St. John with me as backup, just in case, but I'm the primary agent in this mission (ha! It sounds so James Bond!).

How is Washington? I saw Dr Grey on C-Span this morning; I looked for you in the background but didn't catch anything.

I hope you both come back soon,
Kitty

---

----------
From: iceman@x...
Date: March 30th 15:44
To: shadowcat@x...
Subject: Re: a mission
----------
Kitty, that's great! I'm sure you'll do a fantastic job. Dr Grey says it might be a little longer.

I know you said you wanted to spend some time with me when we get back. I hope you won't think I'm being pushy or anything, but I wanted to ask you if you'd want to maybe go on a date with me. We could do something nice, like go to the zoo or a movie, or ice-skating (I'm pretty good at that, ha!)? No pressure, just something nice. I like you a lot, Kitty. You're a really nice girl, and really pretty too.

Think about it, OK?
Bobby

---

----------
From: shadowcat@x...
Date: March 30th 17:08
To: iceman@x...
Subject: Re: Re: a mission
----------
I'd really like that, Bobby. I'd like that a lot. Something nice and sweet, Ok?

Kitty

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 31st 15:34
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: victory
----------
Jeannie, it's time to pay up. Should I come down to Washington, or do you want to come up here? That's assuming I decide to let you come at all. heh.

It was different than I imagined. She didn't cry, this time. She just seemed accepting, like she accepted that she belonged to me, that she was mine.

I did follow her from the hospital, and I ain't ashamed of it. She's holed up in one of the Professor's places.

I knocked on the door, and she let me in without saying a word. Without a word.

I'd figured on needing to persuade her a little, on needing to ease her into it. But she just smiled that small smile of hers and handed me her green silk scarf, to kiss her with. Fuck if I didn't drop to my knees right there and start kissing her stomach and smelling her.

I thought she'd be nervous and scared, maybe a bit inhibited, but she wasn't. Not a bit. She put all of herself in it, I could tell she wasn't holding anything back.

At one point, she took off one of her gloves and ran her bare finger along my hairline, just at the edge where the forehead begins, whispering in that tiny whisper she has. "Be careful," she whispered. Well, I got a little mad at that, like she was threatening me with her skin.

So I got a little gruff, and I popped the claws in one hand, you know, matching her threat. "You be careful," I said.

But she didn't get scared or back down; she touched her bare finger to the flat side of one of the claws and for the first time she looked kind of sad. "I can't," she said.

Well, that just about sent me over. Just that, her touching them and that soft voice of hers. She wasn't threatening me; she was warning me. Like she knew she couldn't be careful enough for the both of us. Like she was worried I'd get hurt.

After, I don't know, Jeannie. I found myself talking to her, holding her. Calling her 'darling,' and 'baby,' and 'love,' and really meaning it. For at least a few hours after, I really meant it. I ain't ever meant it before, not even a little bit.

I talked to her for a long time, telling her stuff, letting her tell me stuff.

I told her about meeting up with the X-Men, how that all happened. I started thinking about what she said once, about how every little decision we make has some effect on the future, and I started wondering what would have happened if I'd met her in that bar in Alberta, instead of you. Would I be the same person if I had? Would you? Or her?

Maybe without you, I wouldn't have learned how to cage up the animal in me... But maybe she wouldn't have minded. I kind of think she wouldn't have minded that side of me. Maybe he was the best part of me, after all.

Fuck it. I'll see you soon, Jeannie, and you better be ready to pay up.

L

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: March 31st 15:50
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: Re: victory
----------
Did you forget the written component of our wager?

~J

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 31st 16:18
To: rogue@x...
Subject: tonight
----------
Rogue,
I'm going to be a little late tonight--I have to check out a few things for a mission the Professor's sending some of the older kids on.

Write me a little, huh? Tell me some more of the things you were talking about last night. Maybe it'll make me hurry up.

Wish I was there instead of here,
Logan

---

----------
From: rogue@x...
Date: March 31st 16:58
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: Re: tonight
----------
Logan,
I'm not sure what kind of things you want me to write about; I'll confess I'm not very good at the whole love letter thing. I know, surprising for someone who's trying to write and sing songs for a living, huh?

I guess I could just tell you that I wish you were here, too, instead of there. Maybe I could tell you that I liked being with you, everything about it. You touched me like no one else ever has. Not even close. When you kissed me, it was like I'd never known what a real kiss was, before that. It was like I'd been asleep and dreaming in black and white, and then suddenly I was awake, and the world was full of color.

I should feel guilty, and try to talk myself out of this, but how can I? It would be like telling myself not to breathe the air. It would be like feeling guilty that I have to drink water.

I can't deny you any more than I can deny my own existence.

I wish I had gone to Canada, instead of New Orleans. I wish I had met you, then. I know this means I'd never have met Remy, and I never thought I'd wish such an awful thing, but there it is. I wish it, because then I would have had you for five more years than I'll get now.

You probably wouldn't have given me a second thought, though... I was all gawky and awkward, with big feet and a funny mouth. I think I would've known, even then. I think I would have recognized you, know you for who you are, and wanted to be near you.

I think I would have known.

You told me last night that you were mine; you told me you belonged to me. If anything in the world is true, I know that I am yours; I know I belong to you. It's like an undeniable truth--it's just there, it just *is*. We belong to each other. What we choose to do with that belonging is another thing. Something to think about tomorrow.

You said no one had ever touched the metal in you before, no one that wasn't going to feel the cut of the blades. I want to touch them; they are connected to you and I can touch them with my bare fingers, and feel your pulse throbbing in them. Do you know what a gift that is for me? They are a gift, in my eyes.

You showed me this part of you, this part that you keep hidden unless you are going to be doing dark, violent things. You showed them to me, like a secret. I treasure that.

I want you to know something, something no one else in the world knows, aside from my parents. My name isn't Rogue; it's Marie. I want you to know that, and to call me that. I never told Remy because, even with him, I hid my secret self, just a little. I kept my past in the dark, even with him.

Not with you. I can't, with you.

Come to me soon,
Marie

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: March 31st 17:04
To: rogue@x...
Subject: Re: Re: tonight
----------
Holy fuck, Marie. I'll be there in forty minutes. Sooner if I can snag Scott's bike.

Logan

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: April 1st 09:44
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: Fw: Re: tonight
----------
I'll come down to Washington tomorrow. You'd better be ready.
L

Begin forwarded message:
>----------
>From: rogue@x...
>Date: March 31st 16:58
>To: wolverine@x...
>Subject: Re: tonight
>---------- Logan,
>I'm not sure what kind of things you want me to write about; I'll confess
>I'm not very good at the whole love letter thing. I know, surprising for
>someone who's trying to write and sing songs for a living, huh?
>


Maybe I could tell you that I liked being with you, everything about
>it. You touched me like no one else ever has. Not even close. When you
>kissed me, it was like I'd never known what a real kiss was, before that.
>It was like I'd been asleep and dreaming in black and white, and then
>suddenly I was awake, and the world was full of color.
>
>I should feel guilty, and try to talk myself out of this, but how can I?
>It would be like telling myself not to breathe the air. It would be like
>feeling guilty that I have to drink water.
>
>I can't deny you any more than I can deny my own existence.

>

>anything in the world is true, I know that I am yours; I know I belong to
>you. It's like an undeniable truth--it's just there, it just *is*.
>


>Come to me soon,

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: April 1st 10:01
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: Re: Fw: Re: tonight
----------
It seems to me you've edited the little darling's letter a bit. I wonder what she said that would make you do that? Hm.

I'm afraid I just can't lower myself to rewarding you for such a piddling conquest. Really, *you* are going to be the fool everyone is laughing at, not Scott. What are you going to do if her cajun vegetable wakes up? Moon after her like a puppy? I won't fuck the lapdog of a mouse, *Wolverine*.

If you want me, show some backbone. You know she probably only feels grateful to you because of her skin. Who could possibly say something like this:

>I can't deny you any more than I can deny my own existence.

To *you*? Especially after knowing you for only a few days. Can you possibly imagine that you are worthy of a statement like that? She's merely caught up in the excitement of it all, that you would want to touch her skin. She's a child, playing a childish game.

Do yourself a favor and cut her loose; maybe then you'll be worthy of my reward. If she whines and protests, just tell her it's beyond your control--it is, really, since she will surely leave you in due time, if you don't leave her. And then your foolishness *will* be beyond anyone's control.

~J

---

----------
From: rogue@x...
Date: April 2nd 05:13
To: lori@xxxx xxx
Subject: I need your help
----------

Lor.
Oh, God. I feel like I am going to die. I need your help with Remy--I'm going to leave here, as soon as possible. I can't be here. I just can't. I need you to take of Remy, as much as you can.

Something very bad has happened to me. No, it didn't happen to me, I made it happen--or at least, I let it happen. I can't stop crying, and I feel like I've vomited out everything in me.

If you could really die of a broken heart, I think I would. I think I would be dead already. Maybe I am dying.

Please promise me you will take care of Remy. Promise me.

Rogue

---

----------
From: xavier@x...
Date: April 2nd 07:02
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: the recent mission
----------
Logan,
Kitty has completed her mission, but she has sustained a minor injury. Please review the mission with her and the others, and do what you can to ensure such things do not happen again.

Charles

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: April 2nd 08:59
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: as you wish
----------
Jean,
It's done. I'll see you in a few hours.

L

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: April 2nd 09:05
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: Re: as you wish
----------
You mean to tell me you actually did it? You actually cut the little mouse loose?

You are a bigger fool than I ever imagined.

My God, Logan, you're in love with the little girl. You threw away love because you were afraid of being made a fool of, and this makes you the biggest fool. You actually thought I would take you? You believe I would allow you to treat me as second best?

Don't bother me again.

J

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: April 2nd 09:25
To: iceman@x...
Subject: Kitty
----------
Bobby,
Kitty's been hurt on her mission. She's asking for you. You should hurry back.

Logan

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: April 2nd 10:04
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: Re: Re: as you wish
----------
Wait till I win her back--that will be the true test of my skill.

As for you, I think it's safe to say the lines have been drawn. It's war, Jeannie, and you won't survive it against me.

Has the Icicle started packing yet? I'd give him about three seconds to make up his mind whether to drop you and run back to his pretty little Kitty.

L

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: April 2nd 10:59
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: war it is
----------
Logan, it was war when you began this ridiculous project. She'll never take you back, because I have struck the killing blow through you. You wounded her mortally and I guided your hand.

I learned a long time ago that it is always best to strike first, and hard. When I was younger, I learned that all men think the same thing when they see me, and it's not a nice thought. I learned that men are pliable and foolish. The best way to wound a woman's heart is by another woman's hand--she knows how to twist the knife just so.

The knife is lodged deep in young Rogue's heart, and no one will be able to pull it out. I've made sure of that.

J

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: April 2nd 11:14
To: iceman@x...
Subject: there's something you should know
----------
Bobby,
You left before I could tell you something important. It has to do with Kitty--I think you should read this email she sent me. I've been trying to do something about it, especially since I know she's telling the truth. Logan has done this before. He did it to me, when he first came to the mansion. Someone has to do something. I've tried, but no one thinks it's important. They think she knew what she was doing. I'm sure she wouldn't want me to tell you this, but I think you should know. Kitty is so innocent and sweet, she couldn't have known what would happen.

Jean


Begin forwarded message:
>----------
>From: shadowcat@x...
>Date: March 28th 11:09
>To: drgrey@x...
>Subject: help me
>----------
>Dr Grey,
>
>I'm sorry to be writing you while you're so busy, but I can't talk to
>Jubilee about this. She's too close to *him*.
>
>Something happened two nights ago. I-- I was going to bed, getting ready,
>when Wolverine--Logan--came in. I was surprised, because I'd never really
>spoken to him before. He started asking about Bobby and saying how he was
>his friend and he wanted to check out his potential girlfriends and make
>sure they were OK.
>
>I said I wasn't seeing Bobby--not yet, and he asked why. I said I didn't
>know, and he said maybe I should make a move since Bobby really likes me
>but he's shy.
>
>I said I didn't know how and that I was shy, too. Then he said--I can
>hardly type this--he said that maybe he could show me. Then he started
>touching my knee.
>
>That's when I said I didn't know if I liked Bobby or Mr Summers, but I knew
>I didn't like him. He said "I think you do, a little," and he touched my
>knee some more. It was kind of hard to think, and I said I wanted him to
>leave, and he said he would if I gave him a kiss so I said I would.
>
>I don't really know how it happened, but before I knew it he was kissing me
>and I couldn't help myself--he was making me do all these things and I
>couldn't stop.
>
>He knocked on my door again last night, but I locked it and didn't answer.
>
>Dr Grey, please help me. I don't know what to do. I feel like I've done
>something awful.
>
>Kitty

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: April 2nd 15:54
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: are you happy?
----------
How have you lived this long and made every single person you meet think you're a perfect angel? How have you kept your black heart a secret all these years? How the hell have you kept it from Chuck?

I'm not going to kill Bobby.

L

---

----------
From: jubilee@x...
Date: April 2nd 18:57
To: drgrey@x...
Subject: everything's totally crazy
----------
Dr Grey,
Something's gone so wrong. I don't even know how to say it. Bobby came back this afternoon and went right to Kitty, 'cause she got her leg all torn up on the mission. After he talked to her for a little, he came out of her room looking like he was gonna freeze the whole mansion. He was all 'Where's Logan?' and I totally swear he froze my hands a little when I said I didn't know.

Then he stomped off and I followed him at a distance, 'cause Logan's always gotten my back, you know? He finally found him out on the back, smoking and drinking a beer, all la-di-da, right? Like nothing was going on. Except he looked about a hundred times more growly that usual.

Bobby just walked right up and said 'I know what you did to Kitty,' and then it looked like he was gonna turn Wolvie into a popsicle, and the Wolvster looked like he was gonna go total claw city on Bobby!

I didn't know what to do, so I sent some sparks at 'em. Just a little, in between them. That surprised them enough to stand down a bit. Then Bobby says, all super serious, 'Tomorrow, Logan. Either get the hell away from here and don't ever come back, or I'll hit you with everything I've got.'

The weird thing is, Logan didn't say anything back, he just nodded, like he expected it or something.

I tried to find the Professor, but he's not here. Dr Grey, you've got to come back and try to talk some sense into them.

-Jubilee

---

----------
From: drgrey@x...
Date: April 2nd 19:32
To: wolverine@x...
Subject: Re: are you happy?
----------
It's really very simple. Take us, for example. Look at me, and look at you--which one of us would you suspect has the darker secrets?

Ninety percent of it is that. I don't look like someone who'd do the things I do, so no one thinks I am. Ten percent of it is deception and self-delusion. Charles doesn't think I could ever do anything wrong, and thus he never sees me do anything wrong.

We're talking about the same man who spends his spare evenings in a plastic box playing chess with Magneto, Logan. He may be the world's most powerful telepath, but he's also powerfully self-deluded when it comes to people he likes. And he likes me. Everyone likes me.

When I met you, I thought I'd found my perfect partner in crime, so to speak. You were wild and fierce, and you were barely capable of living in polite society. I moulded you. I bound you to me at first with my body, and then by helping you cage that beast lying deep within your psyche.

You were right; he was the best part of you. He's the only thing that could have saved you from me.

You want to talk 'belonging'? You've belonged to me since the first time you growled your way into my bed.

You belong to me; you're mine to cast aside as I please.

Have fun tomorrow!

love and kisses, your Jeannie

---

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From: jubilee@x...
Date: April 3rd 12:48
To: cyclops@x...
CC: storm@x...
Subject: come back now
----------
I don't know if all of you know what the HELL is going on, but you should come back home now. Before anyone else dies.

Bobby and Logan fought this morning. I mean serious, powers and claws and everything, fought. I don't even know why. Something about Kitty, I think.

Logan stayed up all night drinking practically every single bottle in the whole mansion, and then he got up at, like, the crack of dawn and went outside to wait for Bobby. He made me swear not to try to stop them.

I wanted to--I really did, but I promised Logan.

Bobby was doing pretty good, basically just trying to keep Logan far enough away that he couldn't claw him. Logan was... he wasn't fighting like I know he can. It was like he didn't care who won or lost. He fought good enough that Bobby had to keep fighting him, though.

Then Bobby made these things, like pointy ice-missiles, and started launching them at Logan. One of them hit Logan in the chest, and Bobby ran at him and shoved it through, right through the chest, freezing it more as he did. Logan went down.

He just lay there, on the ground, like he didn't want to heal from it. It was working slower 'cause of the ice anyway, and he just looked like he didn't care.

Bobby got all shocked and got down next to him, like he didn't think it would go that far. I was totally freaking out. Logan said not to, and that I shouldn't be mad at him, but I was all 'don't tell me what to do, I'll be pissed at your hairy ass if I want to,' and then I was crying a little.

Then he told Bobby that he was sorry, and he gave him a disk, saying it had emails on it that Bobby would want to read. He made him promise to read them and do what he thought he should with them.

Finally, he got this curious look on his face, looking down at his chest with the big icy hole in it, still healing really slowly, and he said, 'I wonder...'

Before either of us could stop him, he jammed his fist in the wound and popped the claws, right through his heart.

He died, and he didn't wake up. I waited.

I don't even think he wanted to wake up.

Bobby got Hank, and they took him down to the med lab.

Please come back, all of you.

Jubilee

---

[excerpt from the 'Gossip on the Hill' website, dated April 4th]

What was a certain noted mutant activist doing in a Congressional bathroom after yesterday's session? Insiders say the lovely lady's hair wasn't the only thing red about her--she locked herself in a stall and spent in excess of three hours crying her little eyes out. This reporter wouldn't deign to speculate (of course!) but one wonders if a certain controlled substance known to be popular in bathrooms before (sniff! sniff!) isn't making a comeback in mutant circles?

---

----------
From: iceman@x...
Date: April 4th 09:22
To: xavier@x...
CC: rogue@x..., storm @xaviers.edu cyclops@x...,
shadowcat@x..., pyro@x..., beast@x...,
nightcrawler@x..., jubilee@x...
Subject: something you should know
----------
Everyone,
you probably know what happened. I'm really sorry for my part in everything. Logan wanted me to do what I thought was right with these. I think you should read them.

[editor's note: Bobby sent copies of emails from drgrey sent to wolverine. Passages specifically identifying Rogue and Kitty were excised.]

---

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From: iceman@x...
Date: April 4th 09:30
To: rogue@x...
Subject: these are for you
----------
Rogue,
I took out anything about you in the stuff I sent to everyone. Here's everything Logan gave me, before. I think you should have it. I really am sorry.

[editor's note: Bobby attached the entire correspondence between wolverine and drgrey, unedited.]

---

----------
From: iceman@x...
Date: April 6th 09:26
To: rogue@x...
Subject: what's happened
----------
Rogue,
I hope you still check this email address. I wanted to tell you what happened when Jean got back from Washington. She didn't know about the emails, and she walked in to breakfast like everything was fine. She said how sorry she was to hear about Logan, and then started eating.

After a minute, she noticed no one else was eating, we were all just looking at her. She looked up, curious. Then Jubilee tossed a printout of the stuff Logan gave me. She read a little of it and turned pale.

Then she got up and started walking out of the dining room, not looking at a single person. I guess a lot of people were projecting pretty hard, 'cause she grabbed her head and started screaming as she ran out.

She's not welcome here, ever again.

You are, though. If you need anyone, let me or whoever know. The Professor's going to keep your email account active, and we really hope you can find a way to feel comfortable with us again.

I'm sorry, again.

Bobby

---

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From: rogue@x...
Date: April 6th 11:38
To: iceman@x...
Subject: Re: what's happened
----------
Bobby,
thank you for the offer, but I don't think I'll take y'all up on it any time soon. I've arranged for someone to look after Remy. I don't feel right doing that now.

I was packing up my things yesterday and I had a guitar pick in my hand, and before I knew it I'd charged it. With Remy's powers. That brought it home; I don't think he's going to get better.

I might go back to New Orleans, but I'm not sure. I'm not even sure if I care anymore.

Tell that Kitty girl that I'm real sorry for everything that happened. I probably never should have come here, but it seemed like a good decision at the time, you know? I guess we never know what's going to happen.

I don't think I'll use this account again.

Rogue

---

----------
From: wolverine@x...
Date: April 10th 00:42
To: beast@x...
Subject: thanks
----------
Hank,
this'll be the last you hear from me. Thank you for keeping things quiet; it's just better this way.

I really thought it was going to work. No, that ain't right. I really *hoped* it was going to work.

All I ask is that you forget all about me. I don't know where I'm going; I thought north, but she might go that way, and I don't want to run the chance of hurting her any more than I already did. I guess that would be pretty hard to do, but I'm sure I could manage it.

Wherever I'm going, I'll be looking for something. A part of me I lost a few years ago.

Maybe I'll even find it.

Have Chuck delete this account, OK?

Thanks again.

-Wolverine

---

[Excerpt from the New Orleans Music Weekly Express, seven years after the
preceding events]

Review,
Rogue: Alaska. ***** [five stars], Small Easy records.

As much as we'd like to claim her as one of New Orleans' own, the first song on Rogue's long-awaited new album, "Alaska," sets us straight right away. Taking its title with a nod to Mississippi's patron saint of the literary word, William Faulkner, "Light in August" has Rogue singing about the strength in naming things, a theme she carries through the entire album.

Another literary reference sneaks its way into the second track, "Secret Sharer." "I saw into your heart of darkness," she wails, her voice half plea, half demand. "You pulled out my name."

Her cover of Richard Thompson's "Walking on a Wire" does everything a cover should do: it makes the listener hear the song in a new light. She makes it her own when she softly sings "This grind stone's wearing me / Your claws are tearing me / Don't use me endlessly / It's too long, too long to myself," making the words--that, in Thompson's version, are accusing and sharp--sound almost sweet, like a lullaby.

By far the strongest track (on an album full of strong tracks) is the fifth, the title track, "Alaska." The pure longing that Rogue infuses in her voice creeps off the record and seeps its way into your ears. She makes you long for the clean, pure, air of our largest state, and yet you know she isn't really singing about a geographic longing; what she longs for is something so pure it stings and bites, like a hard snow in the wind.

This reclusive artist has only released one single and an EP in seven years, and she refuses to give interviews. Her live performances are few and far between (and well worth any time and effort spent in seeking one out). Lets hope it doesn't take another seven years for another album.

End