After the mission he went straight to his room without giving the others as much as a glance. Two hours after that Jean was in his head asking him if he was okay. He told her to leave him the fuck alone. That was another four hours ago and he was still sitting there at the tiny desk in his room.

**********

Everyone kept telling him he should sit this mission out. Xavier had found the location of a secret government lab that was testing on mutants. It was the one mission he wanted to go on. It was the reason he went on all the other missions in the first place. He didn't say a word the whole flight over there. He couldn't tell if he was nervous or anxious, but he couldn't keep the claws in.

They got there and Scott didn't want to waste any time, which he was extremely grateful for. They invaded immediately. The others went straight for the holding cells, their only mission was to get the mutants out and Jean gave the really torn-up ones the best medical attention she could on site. He, on the other hand, could care less about the tortured mutants. He went straight for the Officer's Quarters.

There weren't many people there, however. He wasn't sure if he was happy about that or not. He was ecstatic when he smelled someone behind the door marked `General'. He knew it was just the guy he wanted to talk to. The door gave out easily to his adamantium shoulder and he came face to face with an elder man and a handgun pointed at him.

"What the hell do you...," The General stopped an eyed the
muscular claw-man in front of him. "You're Weapon X," he sputtered out. Logan could smell the fear instantly well up in the man where originally there was none.

"What the hell is Weapon X?!" he growled back at him.
The General smirked at him, but fear still radiated to his
nose. The General turned around and the Wolverine watched the older man's every step. Watched him open the bottom drawer of a filing cabinet. Watched him pull out an enormous folder.

"We were wandering what happened to you," The General
practically waved the file in his face. He glared at him and kept his claws out, but the old man ignored him and flipped through the bounty of paper inside the folder.

"Everything is in here, you know," The General taunted him, still not meeting his glaze. "You've lived quite a long time, Weapon X." He smirked a little bit more after saying that.

"Give it to me." He was aware how desperate the command had come out, but he didn't care. Everything he had been searching for was right in front of him.

The General looked at him then, "Certainly. It is your life. Or lives should I say. My only condition is that you come back to the program."

"I ain't interested in dealing, bub."

***************
That was over six hours ago. The desk lamp provided the only light, casting a soft eerie glow on the rest of the room. He read every sentence in that folder five times before he moved to the next one.

A soft knock vibrating off his door dragged him out of his
trance. "Go away, Rogue." He growled loudly, easily being able to identify the scent of the intruder.

"You alright, sugah? Can I come in?" Her slow southern drawl was muffled by the door.

"No, go the hell away." People had been standing in his way from him discovering his past as long as he could remember and he was tired of it.

"Well, that's the problem with being a rogue, having a hard time following orders and all," this time her voice was clear and crisp without the wood barrier as she let herself into the room.

Logan didn't face her, only growled what should have been an intimidating, "Get out. Now."

"I wanted to see if you were alright," she explained. Closing the door behind her, again obviously ignoring his request.

"I'm fine, kid. Out."

"You sure? `Cuz I saw them government boys peppering you
pretty good back there."

Logan rubbed his temples and wished that it was Scott
bothering him or one of the more annoying members of the X-Men. Someone who he could knock their lights out for pestering him. "God damn it, Marie. You know damn well there ain't a damn thing wrong with me. So I ain't gonna tell you again to get the fuck out."

But when he heard her footsteps move it wasn't towards the
door, but towards him. And he really wished it was someone he could just claw. But then a plate with a sandwich and fries was unceremoniously dumped just beside his elbow. He looked up at her. And her ridiculous smiling face.

"You missed dinner." She offered.

"I ain't hungry." He snarled back.

"Oh, hush up. You need energy for that regeneration of
yours."

He narrowed his eyes at her. She had hope she could drag him out of whatever mood he had been in for hours. But she could tell she wasn't getting anywhere.

Rogue sighed and made her way towards that door and Logan
thanked God that she finally was going to leave. But to his utter dismay he heard her walking back.

"If the sandwich didn't work, I had a back up plan, sugah."

He looked at the twelve pack of beer slammed down on his
desk, nearly knocking the plate off. He grabbed one out of the case and turned his attention back onto the file, "Thanks. Now get the fuck out."

Rogue rolled her eyes, then crossed the room to plop down on the end of his bed, "I ain't going anywhere till you tell me what the hell is bothering you." she threatened.

Logan took a long gulp of his beer then clinched his eyes
shut. `Just ignore her. Just ignore her. Just ignore her...' He repeated in his head to control the violent urge to forcefully get rid of the younger girl.



It didn't take long before he could hear her gentle, easy
breathing and knew she was asleep. Probably exhausted from the mission. He turned his attention back to his past. The past he didn't remember having. One beer turned into five beers and the sandwich disappeared quickly enough.

An hour later and he had made it half way through the large folder when he smelt another presence traveling down the hallway outside his door.

"Scott," he called out quietly, trying not to wake the
sleeping girl on his bed a few feet away from him.

Evidently the other man heard because he had slowly opened
the door and peered inside, "You okay, man? You worried us
disappearing like—"

"Yeah fine." Logan interrupted him. "Do me a favor and take her to her room, would ya?" He asked jerking his head towards her.

"Sure man. The professor told us what you found, you sure
you don't wanna talk about it?" The leader offered as he made his way towards the bed.

"All I want you to do is mind your own damn business and take her to bed," Logan sneered at him. Scott he would most definitly claw up right now.

"Alright, just understand that were all here for you and—"

"Would you just get the damn girl the hell out of here?!!"

"Right." Scott hissed at him and scooped the hard slumbering Rogue into his arms and carried her out of the room, kicking the door closed behind him.

"Fuck!" Logan roared in frustration.

*****************

"We're going to miss you. Logan," Storm said into his
shoulder, giving him a tight hug.

"I'm gonna miss you too, `Ro, but I gotta go," he gladly
returned the gesture. The last thing he had wanted was to go into long goodbyes with these people. But found the more and more people who came up to him the sadder he was that he was leaving them all behind. He found himself eagerly shaking Scott's hand, right before he gave his wife a quick kiss goodbye, of coarse.

He meet the Professor at the door to the garage. Securing
his pack further up his shoulder he braced himself for the `you should stay' speech. But now he knew something past and he was off to retrace it, try and remember something.

"Logan," Xavier greeted him.

"Wheels."

"Are you happier now that you have more information?"

"No. But it's my life. I wanna remember it." Logan flashed
him his paten grin, "You gonna convince me to stay?"

"I will inform you that your absence leaves a great gap in
our strength. But, no, I will not try to convince you to stay. I do wish to give you these, however," he tossed him a set of keys, which Logan easily caught, "you will find the new camper perhaps better equipped than your old one had been."

"Thanks, Chuck." He stepped around the man in the wheel
chair and jerked open the door to the newly attached camper and tossed his duffel bag in. Looking inside he noted first how clean it was, and then the modern appliances inside of it. Grinning, he slammed the door shut and made his way to the driver's side of the truck.

"Logan," Xavier stopped him as he opened the door, "Don't let what your past has already taken away effect what your future can give you."

"Uh…" he was slightly thrown off by the professor's ying-yang proverb, but you never knew what kind of crazy stuff smart guys would say, "Yeah, sure thing." Quickly he climbed in and sped off away from the school, not necessarily eager to get away, but eager to arrive to someplace he'd always dreamed of being.

***************

Border control was an absolute joke. There was nothing but a whole lot of nothing between New York and the Canadian border. Unless one of the trees was going to jump out and ask him for his papers, of course. Which, after everything that had happened to him he wouldn't be completely shocked by it. It was lucky for them to that no one had been there to stop him. Logan was a complete mess. He couldn't listen to the radio or stop. All he could think about was getting to North Wind. And he hadn't gone anything less than 85 in his pursuit to get there. He wasn't sure what he would have done if some snub-nosed border patrol man had stopped him.

He kept reviewing what he had read in the folder in his mind, hoping that some kind of memory of any of it would spark up. Any of it but the lab testing. That shit he remembered. It was now night and he hadn't come up with anything and was only getting more frustrated. Which is probably why he didn't see the deer slowly walking into the road?

He was able to jerk back into consciousness in enough time to swerve the truck into the other lane, around the shocked animal. He truck leered onto one side in the hasty move causing everything in the camper to crash into the side of it. Thankfully there had not been any other traffic on the deserted Canadian highway and he was able to return to his normal travel.

Logan looked back into the camper to survey the damage before turning his eyes back onto the road. So much for Chuck's microwave, he laughed to himself.

Then a tiny sound was picked up by his sensitive ears that he brain could only translate as, "Fuck."

'What the hell', he looked back into the camper again but saw nothing more than the disaster from before. Nor could smell anything out of the ordinary. 'So what the hell was that?' Quickly he jerked the truck to the side of the road and cut the engine.

Logan rose out of his seat, taking a step towards the camper. Another faint noise and the claws came out. Raising one eyebrow he kicked the massive pile of junk.

"Ow! What the hell is your problem?!" the debris yelled at
him.

"Marie?!!" The thick southern accent through him for a loop and he stared at the pile, his facing matching that of the deer from only a few moments ago.

"Hey, sugah," she ripped off the blanket that was concealing her head and smiled at him, while rubbing her shoulder. "Didya haveta kick me like that? Like being thrown into the wall and crushed by a microwave ain't enough?"

"What the hell are you doing?!"

"Being abused, evidently! You know, you can put the claws
away. I can't even get up let alone attack ya."

The rest of his mind finally returned to him, anger
accompanying shock now. But the claws returned to the resting place and he made his way all the way into the camper and lifted the industrial microwave off the girl's stomach. She kicked the vast amounts of bags and cans and blankets covering her off and sat up. She decided she'd better smile at him. Yep. From the look on his face she needed her real cute one.

"What the hell do you think your doing, kid?" he tried
again. He decided there was no point yelling, considering the size of the headache he had already.

"I'm coming with you," she answered easily enough.

"The hell you are," he turned around and made his way back to the driver's seat, grabbing the `X' communicator from the dashboard, "I'm telling Scooter to pick you up right this damned minute."

"No!" She jumped up from the floor of the camper and snatched the device out of his hand, sitting in the passenger's seat. The anger pouring off of him was making the inside of the truck unbearable so she decided she had better explain.

"I ain't going back to the mansion. It's my summer break and I decided I wanted to travel some more. And I figured, you know, your were leaving on your big adventure so I could, just, you know, go with you. And that way we could do our traveling together, so we both could have company."

"Did you ever stop to think that maybe I didn't want you with me?! That this was something I wanted to do alone?!" He was furious with her. She was costing him valuable time and now he'd have to sit here and wait for god damned One-Eye to show up to come and get her.

"Fine!" she screamed, matching his anger with hers, "You
don't want me with you? Then just drop me off at the next town. I'll hitchhike to Alaska or something. Something I was planning to do after school anyway. But I am not going back. Not till after summer."

"I ain't fucking leaving you no where. You're going back to the damned mansion!"

She narrowed her eyes at him. She figured he be mad at
first, then think what she did was cute and gladly taken her with him. And then it would be just the two of them traveling like old times. But he didn't want her with him, she realized. Not one damn bit.

Wordlessly she reached into the back to grab her ratty old
duffel back then jerked the passenger side door open to get out. But one larger hand reached out and grabbed the back of her shirt.

"Where the hell do you think you're going, kid?!"

"I'm getting out so I can find someone who WANTS to give me a ride."

"Get this through your head, Marie. I am not letting you get into cars with a bunch of damned strangers with who knows what the fuck is wrong with them. So I ain't dropping you off at the next town, I ain't letting you go to damn Alaska by yourself, and I ain't letting you get out in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of the fucking night!"

She twist and turned to get the shirt out of his grasp, but his hand held her in the car just as tight, "You can't tell me what to do, Logan! I'm nineteen, if I want to travel by myself, I can!"

"Yeah, and how well did that go for you the last time?"

His words stung her ears and she stopped squirming. She
clenched her eyes shut tight, "I ain't some sad little kid anymore. Face it. You may be able to make me go back but you sure as hell can't make me stay. I'll just leave again," a loud sigh that contained all her angry and frustration escaped her, leaving her words exhausted, "I just thought I'd rather be with you then by myself."

Logan took the opportunity of her stillness to jerk her
farther back into her seat and reached across and slammed the door shut. He really wanted to be mad at her but he understood every word she had said. It was probably the him inside her that made her restless in the mansion for so long to start with. And there was no way the others could guarantee to keep an eye on her, not if she didn't want them to. Hell, he didn't even know she snuck into his
truck. His mind screamed at him that it was the second time she did it to him.

He snatched the duffel bag from her lap and tossed it into
the back. And went to start the engine again. Rogue noted how his features had softened and stopped herself from releasing the big smile itching at the corner of her mouth and fastened her seat belt.

Though the truck was started he made no move to pull back
onto the road. After a few more moments of silence he spoke again. "It ain't that I don't want you with me, kid. It's just that–," he stopped to consider his words and looked over at her to find she was giving him that look that he hated. The one where she looked as if he was going to tell her the meaning of life or how to cure cancer. "I'm not sure what I'm going to find or who I really was."

She couldn't help but let the smile free at his admission. "Sugah, I don't care if you shot Kennedy. Nothing could ever change my opinion of you."

He turned away from her and pulled back onto the
road, "That's easy to say, darlin'."

"Alright, how bout this. You don't have to tell me
anything. Not unless you want to. When you go off to mess with your past, I'll find me something to do in town or something. I'll just stay out of your way. When you're done you can come and get me. That way I get my adventure and you'll have someone to talk to. Just in case."

He considered her proposition. He didn't believe for a
moment that she would leave her nose out of his business, but he found he liked the idea of having her with him. Where he could watch the little sneak.

"Deal. But no runin' off on me or nuthin' like that. You
gotta do what I say. If I say it's time to leave, you gotta move it with no question asked, deal?" he offered her his hand, glancing from the road to her.

"Deal." she took it and gave him one firm shake.

He shot her another look out of the corner of his eye, "Those my clothes?"

She rolled the sleeves of the large shirt up a little bit and smiled down into her gloves, "Sure are."

"So I couldn't smell ya, right?"

"Yep. I used your soap and shampoo too before I left."
He couldn't help the proud grin from spreading on his face.

***************

They pulled into God Knows Where the next day. It was a
little mining town that looked like it shut down twenty years ago.

Logan stepped out of the truck, slamming the door shut behind him, jerking Rogue awake.

"Hm? We there yet?" she mumbled out half asleep.

"Yeah, we're here. Looks like everybody fucking else isn't, though" he scanned the dirt town for some signs of life. He didn't know it was possible Canada could even have a dirt town.

Rogue walked around the front of the truck, making her way
over to him, "Well, they won't mind us looking around then, will they?" She flashed him a sly grin.

The old town looked like in should have been in the old West instead of North-East Canada. It had one main road that went straight through the town with small wood and brick buildings lining either side of it. There were no traffic lights or street lamps anywhere in sight. Every square inch of the place looked brown in the harsh afternoon light.

"So what are we looking for?" Rogue asked, noted the way
Wolverine's eyes darted around the minuscule town.

"Something I remember, recognize. The government file listed this shit-hole as my last known address."

"Okay, so we look for the place with all the scratch marks," she shrugged.

"This is pre-claws, darlin'," he pointed out, trying to
restrain his snarl at her comment.

"Well, sugah, this was your home, which way is your gut
telling you to go?"

"The woods outside of town." he surprised himself how quickly he said it. He didn't remember the town or a house or trees. Something just told him that he wouldn't live in the city. He'd live somewhere he could keep a low profile. Somewhere where he could easily smell or hear someone coming. His heart told him he was always paranoid, not just after the labs.

"To the forest we go!" Rogue chippered out eagerly.

******************

"You see anything yet, sugah?" the previous excitement in her voice died down to obvious boredom. She dragged her feet behind him, looking down at the leaves as the crumbled under her shoes.

"You can wait in the car," Logan growled a suggestion, not
looking back at her.

"What? And miss all this fun?" the sarcasm dripped.

The Wolverine lashed around to her then, causing Rogue to
stop with a surprised squeak. "This isn't a game to me, kid! So either keep your trap shut or go back to the god damn truck!"

"Sorry. Seen and not heard, got it." She tried to flash him her innocent smile but he only grunted at her and continued his track into the forest. Rogue rolled her eyes and followed. Silently.

Well, silent up until Logan heard, "Sweet Jesus in heaven
above" whispered behind him. Sensitive hearing and blabbermouths was not a good combination.

"I thought I told you to–"

"Oh hush up! Look!" She interrupted him and pointed off in
the opposite direction he was walking. When he walked over and saw what caught her attention his heart jumped into his throat. Hell, it felt like his heart, lungs, and at least part of his intestinal track. Behind a thick grouping of trees was a tiny wooden cottage.

A breathless, "Fuck." was all he could manage.

"Look like home, sugah?" Although her choice of words sounded like she was mocking him again when he looked at her face he saw how serious she was. In fact, he could smell that she was a little afraid. He admitted to himself that he probably should be too.

Slowly he made his way down the small ravine that use to
probably be a stream, his eyes never leaving the little structure just fifty feet in front of him. Rogue went to follow him but was stopped when he rounded on her again.

"No. You stay here." he commanded.

"What?! You're kidding, right?"

"No."

"Logan! It's just a house! An old, empty, torn-up house!
There ain't nothing to protect me from! Hell, I'm more likely to be attacked by a damn moose or something if I stay out here!" she threw her hands up in frustration at him. And then proceed to stomp her feet. Just like Jubilee had showed her.

"Hey, you agreed on the rules, kid. Stay when I say stay.
So stay." he growled at the last `stay' then made his way back toward the house.

"Technically the rule was run when I say run!" she yelled
after him, when he simply ignored him she added, "Butt head!!" to the end of it. She then mentally chided herself. "Yeah. And you don't understand why he won't stop calling you `kid'?" She shook her head in disgrace and took a seat on a nearby log and simply waited.


Then nearly twenty minutes later Logan still hadn't come out of the dilapidated structure. Rogue thought that could only mean one thing. He found something. Something interesting. The only thing Rogue had found was that ants are very busy the time of year. She jumped up from her perch and over the tiny ditch and went to follow the Wolverine.

When she got closer to the house she could tell how bad of
shape it was really in. The one small window on the front was smashed. What was left of it was stained black. She guessed that termites as well as ants where extremely active inside of the walls.

Slowly she pushed to door open just wide enough for her to
step in. "Logan, sugah, you alright in here?" she practically whispered.

No answer came from the darkness inside. She stepped further in and left the door wide up, to let some light (not to mention air) into the tiny place.

The small room was a bigger mess than the outside of the
house. Furniture was broken into pieced and shattered all across the room. Sitting on the floor leaning against the far back wall was her friend, almost hidden completely in the darkness.

The look on his face scared her. She had never seen Logan
look just so completely lost and, as much as it sickened her to say it, pathetic.

She tried to walk up to him as slowly and softly as she could, as to not jar or surprise him. Slowly she eased down and kneeled in front of him, careful as to not actually come close enough to touch him.

"Logan?"

"Its mine." he said without looking at her still.

"What's yours? The house?"

He nodded then handed her the crumbled yellow piece of paper that hand been resting on the floor right beside him.

"Dear Mr. Logan, we would like to offer you this unique
opportunity to buy stocks in North Wind Mining. As one of our miners this company wouldn't be great without you. Thank you on behave of the entire board of trustees. Michael Webber, President." She read but had to take a few short breathes before she could finish it.

Forcefully she grunted out the last part, "August 4, 1908."

She gently set the letter down the exact same place he had
picked it up, just below his fingertips. A million things raced through her mind, none of them were able to form one complete thought. She quickly stopped trying for any opinion then caught a look at his face again. All she knew was she had to do something, anything, to get that look off his face.

"Maybe…maybe it's not you. Maybe it's a different Logan."

"Get real, kid. It's me."

She sighed at the complete lack of emotion that was in his
voice and sat in a more comfortable position.

"So what if it is you? All this tells us is that you were a miner," she rationalized.

"A miner in goddamn 1908, Maire!" He screamed, his animalistic face finally coming back to life. "1908! That was 98 years ago! And no telling how damn old I already was back then!"

Within seconds the claws were out and shredding the remains of what use to be a chair lying beside him.

"Well, sugah, did ya get the stocks? They might be worth
some serious cash now."

He stared blankly at her, his face completely cold, "Get the fuck out. And get the hell away from before I kill you." He warned.

"No, Logan. I'm sorry; I was just trying to lighten the
mood. And you're right, I'm shit for saying it." she nodded fervently to appease him and hoped to God she didn't smell too afraid to him.

But she did. He could smell every drip of fear flowing off
her, straight to his nose. And he was happy for it. It helped him reel his hatred and anger back in to a controllable level. If Rogue was actually afraid of him he had gone too far.

"The folder didn't say anything about it. It only said that I enlisted in 1940 and I had lived here last," he explained.

"That's all that big ol' folder said?" she asked in
disbelief.

He answered her with a simple and stern, "No."

"I'm not allowed to know the rest, right? Logan, you can't
freak out about this. Jean told you that you were probably pretty old." she rested her gloved hand on his knee in an attempted to soothe him.

"Yeah, I figured 60 or something like that. Not over a
hundred." He sighed in exasperation, running a hard, calloused hand through his hair, amazingly leaving the spikes in place.

"You listen to me and you listen to me good. Stop mopping
like a little pansy and get over it!" She snapped at him and he jerked his head up. His eyes practically bulging out at her in shock.

"So what? You're technically 100. But it actuality you are a fine-looking man in his prime! Hell, Logan, I'm however many years old you are plus Erik, plus Bobby, John, and David. Not to mention myself!" she took a deep breathe after her ranting then smiled at him, "Sugah, we already knew we were messed up. What's the big deal about having a tail when you already got horns?"

"You…you just don't understand kid-"

She interrupted him right then, anger now traceable in her
voice, "No I don't understand. Just like you don't understand what it's like to not be able to experience touch. Or not be able to see without everything being in red. Or not have to walk down the street as a giant blue monster! Gawd, Logan! Did you ever stop to think that maybe it wasn't the government that swiped your memory? Huh? Did you ever think that maybe you did it because, deep down, you don't want to remember that part of your life?"

There was something in her smell just then. Something that
made him forget about being angry at her for telling him off, let alone calling him a pansy. She smelled...smell like she knew what she was talking about. Just so complete sure.

"What…what do you know? What are you not telling me, kid?"
His voice was surprisingly soft.

All the color instantly left her face. "Nothin. I…I'm just
thrown' things out there. Come on, let's get out of here, it gives me the creeps," she jumped up quickly and dusted some of the filth off the back of her jeans. She didn't wait for some much of a `boo' from him as she all but ran out of the door. He stared at her retreating form with an almost serene look on his face.

Until he jumped up in a fit of rage and began finishing the destruction of the small cottage. First walls then furniture and doors gave way to his claws. Each slash off his arms was accompanied by a grizzled scream.


*****************

Hours later he walked up the pathetic dirt road, dusk
settling around him. Tearing the hell out of the house released a lot of his anger and frustration. The acres and acres of forest that fell to his claws after that made him feel infinitely better. Once he was close enough he saw his truck. And the girl draped across the hood of it.

"Hey darlin'," he said effortlessly, his cigar firmly set in the corner of his mouth. She didn't acknowledge him, just stared up at the slightly darken sky. He nodded at leaned against the front of the truck, blowing out smoke and turned his head to look at her.

"Couldn't find any trouble to get into?" he guessed.

She sighed and turned her head towards him, "Nope. I looked around. Nothing but dust, dirt, and rats. And I ain't particular fond to any of `em."

He nodded and got off the truck. She closed her eyes again
thinking he was going to leave her alone. But instead he grabbed her ankle and with one quick tug she was sliding across the hood and off the truck, her feet resting perfectly on the ground.

"Come on, kid. Let's see what kind of food Chuck packed."
They made their way towards the back of the camper and Rogue couldn't help herself.

"What's the matter, sugah? Destroying wildlife got your
tummy grumbling?" she asked sweetly.

He turned his head just enough so she could see the bright
smile that was gracing his features. "Damn right."



"Jeez, kid. I think you've just about ate me out of house
and home!"

"Oh shut up! I didn't anymore than you did." The two of them sat comfortably at the small settee, several Hungry Man dinner cartons lying around the table. The empty beer
cans were stacked behind Logan on the kitchenette counter.

"So, Logan. I got a question I've always wanted to ask you."

"Shoot. I might have an answer for ya'."

"Why ain't you runnin' around anymore?" he cocked his eyebrow at her. "You know what I mean. I got a lot of memories of your with other woman. A lot, sugah."

"And? You got a point, Marie?"

"Ya. I mean, you don't really do that kinda stuff anymore.
Haven't for awhile now, I was just, um...you know, wondering why? Don't ya, um…miss it?" her head tilted slightly, making her platinum white bangs falls a little into her face.

He stared at her. Not that she noticed, though, she refused to look up after asking him.

"Nah. I dunno. Guess I finally grew out of it. Took me 100
years, but," he shrugged his shoulders and finished off his fourth beer.

She smiled at him and began putting her gloves back on, "I
don't know how you do it, sugah. The few boys I've been out with just `bout tuckered me clean out."

"Stamina, darlin'. Stamina," he winked at her.




They both went to bed shortly after. Logan said he wanted to get up at what he called "the ass crack of dawn" and keep moving. It was actually more comfortable than Rogue had guess inside that little camper. Logan slept on the day bed and Rogue got the hitchhiker's bed. Another one of Logan's cute little terms. It was actually just code for the floor. But he did find her an air mattress in one of the cabinets so it wasn't like she could complain.

Logan wasn't aware that the knocking and mumbling noise
wasn't just his dream till he had woken up and still heard it. The clock in the kitchen read 3:12 a.m. and it was all he could do to suppress a growl. It had been Rogue making all that noise. He kicked the blanket off him and sat up, "Rogue." he called softly, rubbing his eyes.

But she continued to thrash about in her sleeping bag. Her
little moans were increasing in volume. He watched her for a second and cursed under his breathe. She was having another damn nightmare. It didn't matter if it was his or Magneto's, both as far as he was concerned was his fault.

He got up and slowly and kneeled on the floor, etching slowly closer to her while putting his gloves on, "Maire? Kid, wake up."

He couldn't decide what was better, stroking her hair or shaking her shoulder. But she didn't respond to his gentle command to wake up, but only became more and more violent.

He put his hands on her shoulders to hold her down and keep her from hurting herself, "Come on. Marie, wake up." He commanded loudly, now worried about what the hell she was actually seeing behind her twitching eyelids.

"NOO!" her loud scream echoed off the walls of the camper as she jerked up, away from Logan all but slamming herself into the side of the campers. Logan was about to make his way over to her but stop moving the same time his heart stopped beating.

Long bone claws jerked out of her hands nearly as quickly as she had jerked out of bed. Her banshee-like scream barely distracted him from the weapons in front of him, blood dripping off the base of them, going down her forearms and on the floor in front of her.

"Holy fuck," he managed to say and his bodily functions
returned to him. He ran over to her and sat in front of her, grabbing her wrists. "Shit Maire."

"I killed her…I…I..," she was mumbling incoherently in almost a whisper. Her eyes were completely distant and blank, a hazed over version of her normally bright brown color.

"Maire, baby, what are you talking about??" fear was evident in his voice. He couldn't imagine a site worse to him then her without light in her eyes, covered in her own blood and tears freely flowing down her cheeks and neck.

But then as quickly as it had happened he noticed her eyes
slowly going back to normal, the fear and confusion gone from them, replaced by something more like exhaustion.

"Logan, it hurts." she groaned out, closing her eyes and
throwing her head back.

Hearing her voice go back to normal he allowed himself to
breathed and rubbed his thumbs across the back of her hands.

"I know it does darlin'. You gotta try and get them back
in." he instructed softly.

She sighed and looked at him. Then closed her eyes and
concentrated on the bone that had ripped through her hand. Her eyes opened, "I…I. can't Logan. I don't know how."

"It's alright, just listen to me, okay?" she quickly
nodded. "Okay. You're shaking like hell, kid. First thing you gotta do is calm down."

She only stared at him. He kept the continuous motion on the back of her hand, his now being covered in blood since the torn skin evidently was not going to heal with the claws out. He started to take deep breathes in and out and nodded at her, suggesting that she should follow his lead.

She copied him and soon he noted that her heart rate was
beginning to slow. Both their eyes were glued to the bone claws as they slide agonizingly slow back into her body.

"Logan, it's not healing" sure enough there was three perfect cuts between her knuckles on both hands that were still bleeding.

"Fuck." he cursed. "Okay, just hold still, I'm goin' to go
get the first-aid kit." He released her hands and jumped up refilling through the drawers.

After several loud crashes and bangs accompanied by growls
and curses he came back to her. Carefully he took her left hand and began cleaning and bandaging it.

"You wanna tell me about it, darlin'?" he raised one eye brow at her, keeping most of his attention on her hand, though.

"No," she answered meekly.

"Wrong answer."

She let out a deep sigh, "Logan, I just want to take an
aspirin and go back to sleep," she pleaded with him.

He set her hand carefully down in his lap and took her other one, "And you can. Right after you tell me what you were dreaming about."

"It was nothing."

"You've never popped claws before, Marie. So you are gonna
tell me right now what was in your damned dream." His stern voice hinting that he wanted this conversation to be over.

"No! It had nothing to do with you, alright?!" she all but
yelled at him.

"You gotta stay calm, kid, or they might come back out," he finished her right hand and stared directly at her. He took both her hands in his and began circling his thumbs just like he had done before over the bandages.

"Tell me." he commanded. He thought it very unlikely that it had nothing to do with him, unless claws were a secret talent she'd been hiding from him all along.

"Please, Logan, trust me. You don't want to hear it."

"I can't imagine anything I wanna hear more at the moment," he tried to give her a reassuring smile. But she only shook her head at him. So he decided all he had left was the direct approach.

"Who did you kill, Marie?"

That made her head snap up and look at him, "What?!"

"Who did you kill? In your dream. When you first woke up
you said `I killed her'." he explained.

"I didn't kill anyone." she said quickly.

"It's okay, kid. Just tell me, we can talk about it. Was it like `Ro for giving you a bad grade in history or Kitty for flirting with the Ice Prick?" he guessed.

"I didn't kill anyone!! You did!" she screamed at him. Once the words left her mouth she instantly regretted it. There was no way this night was going to end well.

"Someone I kill? You had a dream of me killing someone?" she was surprise how calm he sounded, like he wasn't upset, offended, or anything like that. She only shook her head in reply to his question.

"Not a dream..." she shook her head again.

"A memory?..." she nodded.

He mentally kicked himself. Not only did she give him
nightmares of government lab experiments, but now she was seeing him kill people in her sleep. He couldn't believe this girl cared for him as much as she did; she should be pissed at him for ruining her entire subconscious.
She was starting to cry now, those quiet, small tears that tears at a big, strong grown man like nothing else.

"Listen, kid. I'm sorry you gotta see that shit, but whoever it was I had a reason..." He was trying to explain but she forcefully shook her head.

"I was an accident. You...you didn't mean to," the words
were hard to get out through her now sobs.

"Okay, I didn't mean to. Who was it?" She shook her head at him again.

"Come on, tell me. Now."

"No."

"Marie."

"It was the woman you loved!" she finally yelled at him.

He instantly stopped the motions of his hands and stared
blankly at her. "What did you say?"

"You didn't mean to!" she said again.

"I didn't mean to kill the woman I loved? You better fucking explain, Marie."

She hit the back of her head against the wall of the camper. This was the one thing she didn't want to tell me. She had found this memory of his months ago and did everything in her power to protect him from it. And now one bad night of memories and claws and she didn't have a choice.

"It…it really was an accident, Logan."

"You said that much already."

"Fine. Ya'll ran away together and were living together when someone came after you. He…he wanted to kill you for…for…vengeance or something like that. I don't know. But ya'll were fightin' and you were just about to finish," she held out the sob she had been holding in, the vivid ugliness of her dream playing back to her, "finish clawin' him up. He...he grabbed her and shoved her in
front of him," she gasped for air again, wringing her bandaged hands. "So…you clawed her instead." She couldn't finish the rest of the story. She clenched her eyes shut trying to get the images and all of Logan's emotions out of her head.

He just stared at the girl in front of him. Shock was
evident of his face. He couldn't help but be amazed how many horrible things had happened to him. And he seemed to be the root to all of them.

"What…what was her name," he stammered out. He yelled at his brain to find some image, some picture of this woman that he let love him only to kill her. He cursed himself for nothing that came up.

But Rogue didn't answer him. He could tell she was off in a world separate from him and he became infuriated. Because he knew right now she could see her. She remembered her and what she sounded like and felt like. Everything Logan wanted. No. Needed to know. He needed those images and memories that to Rogue were just nightmares.

He grabbed her forearm tightly, "Her name."

"Rose," Rogue whispered, giving him the saddest brown eyes he had ever seen.

He nodded and loosens his grip, but didn't let go of her.
Rose. Something told him that was right. The sound of it just made him feel gentle and good. But he needed more.

"Describe her to me."

"No, Logan, please." her eyes pleaded him more than her words did but there was nothing he could do. He needed to have some image of her more than he needed oxygen right now.

"I have to know, Marie."

She reluctantly closed her eyes and called the imagine back up. The image she never wanted to see the rest of her life. The image of the woman she loved (though she didn't know why) being murder.

"Blonde, shoulder length hair. Brown eyes. High cheek bones with…with a small mole on the right side of her nose." Logan tried to picture her. Nothing came to mind. He became so frustrated he wasn't aware that he began squeezing her again till he heard her little whimper. Instantly he let go and stared at the mess of a girl in front of him. He got the worst fucking news ever and he had to mentally torture an innocent girl to get it.

"I'm sorry," he said, gently wiping her cheeks with both of his hands.

"Me too."

He moved his hand down her face and caressed her neck
lightly. She began to relax again under his touch and concentrated on that instead of the horrible memory. He caught her full attention when he hooked one finger around the chain dangling from her neck and slowly lifted it out of her shirt. He grasped the dog-tags firmly in
his hands and taught of the old man at the mansion, the countless murder-missions in the folder, and the dull, warm dog-tags in his hands.

"So, what's in Alaska?"

She blinked at him a few times, "Oh. Um, I don't know. I've always wanted to see Denali; I read they've got this really cool mummified bison."

He got up from his crouched position in front of her, "Over a weeks drive for a dead buffalo? The things I do for you, Kid."

She was stuck staring at him again and he laughed a little at the confused look on her face. He gently grabbed her elbows and effortlessly lifted her to her feet.

"Wait," she touched his shoulder ever so lightly, "I thought we were chasing your past? Isn't there like fifteen other towns you wanted to go to?"

"Naw. I'm comin' to find that my past don't have shit on
seeing a dead, frozen bison with my girl."

She turned away from him because she knew there was no way to suppress the blush that was overtaking her face. When she felt she had her hormones under enough control that she could go near him without over driving his system she took her seat in the passenger's chair right beside him.

She watched the trees and landscapes go by and fantasized
about her and Logan getting married, having kids, and of coarse a little fluffy dog that he would criticize but love in secret. All the things he would be pissed and scared as hell if he knew she was thinking them. She had tried to think about the sex the would have together. Something she planned on working on immediately. But she
found that thinking about positions and moans was not safe while Logan was driving, twice he ran a red light, almost hitting three cars. He mumbled a `sorry' her way then ran his fingers through his hair. This road trip was by far the BEST idea she ever had.

"Oh, darlin'" he jerked her out of her daydreaming.

"Yeah?"

"If you ever remember like an old bank account number or if I have a rich uncle or something— that shit I wanna know."

"You got it, sugah."





THE END!