Rogue gently brushed a gloved finger across the dry petal; causing it to fall to the wooden dresser below. She sniffed as tears filled her eyes at the thought behind the flowers. It wasn't because he loved her. It was because he felt guilty and sorry. Every man thought the same way. Bring her flowers and everything will be alright. But for her, it wouldn't be. He left. Again. But this time, she knew. She knew he wasn't coming back. The pain tore at her heart at the thought. She thought of him as she walked to her now empty bed. The same place they shared things. Vocally and physically. She curled up in a tight ball and allowed the tears to fall down her cheeks.

The flowers you gave me
Are just about to die
When I think about
What could've been
Makes me want to cry

She remembered how he told her he cared for her. Wouldn't let anything hurt her. He felt for her. But not in the way she had wanted. He gave into her. Not because he felt something more than care for her. He never loved her. He said he had, but she knew it was a lie. It was a lie she wanted to hear. At the time she thought he did, but now she knew. He just pitied her. A slight laugh shook her and the bed as she thought about how he said he loved her. He mumbled it. Then she thought it was muffled because he had his lips against the top of her head as they curled up together on the bed. He just told her what she longed to hear. Tried to ease her pain. Again, pity.

The sweet words you whispered
Didn't mean a thing
I guess our song is over
As we begin to sing

She slowly climbed under the covers as the chill in the room grew. She missed his strong arms wrapped around her. His warmth sinking through the fabric and warming her skin. She took in a shaky breath at the thought as more tears slipped past her eyelids and down her face, soaking the pillow beneath her head. The thought flowing through her head was 'could've been' 'could've been'. They could've been so many things to her. But would never be. And it broke her heart more.

Could've been so beautiful
Could've been so right
Could've been my lover
Every day of my life
Could've been so beautiful
Could've been so right
I'll never hold what could've been
On a cold and lonely night

She buried her head in the pillow at an attempt to drown out her sobs and his scent attacked her nose like nothing before. She clutched the end of the pillow tightly as her pain grew. She wanted him with her. Needed him with her. But he would never be here with her again. The smell of him on her pillow pushed memories to the front of her mind. The memories of when he so carefully, but still full of passion, made love to her. The first time she felt weird. Awkward. But most of all shy. This was the man she had been in love with for so long and now it had finally happened. Her dream came true. But now. Now she had woken up. And she wanted desperately to go back to sleep. To be with him again. But she knew better as she cried herself to sleep.

The memories of our lovin'
Still linger in the air
Like the fainted scent
Of your roses
Stay with me everywhere

She didn't expect this. She gave up after a year of him being gone and she had moved on with her life. She was actually starting to feel happy again. But as she watched from her bedroom window as the motorcycle turned into the garage, everything that she felt for him rose to the surface. She wasn't sure what she should do. If she should run out and greet him like she had in the past or to just act like she didn't care. Walking out of the room and down into the rec room she made up her mind. He didn't care for her. Not the way he made her believe and he was the last person she wanted to see. Ever again. Sitting down in a chair by the television she picked up a magazine and flipped through it. Acting oblivious to his arrival.

She heard him enter the mansion and to her surprise her heart beat didn't speed up and she was able to breathe normally. She pulled a lock of white hair behind her right ear as she read an interesting article on relationships. She knew he entered the room but paid no attention to him. He couldn't have, or at least shouldn't have, expected a warm welcome from her. He tore her heart out and stomped on it repeatedly in front of her.

"Hey, kid," she heard him say but she refused to say anything back as she continued to flip through the teen magazine.

"Not gonna say hi?" he asked as he kneeled down in front of her. He placed a gentle hand on her knee and she quickly moved her leg out from under it. Sweeping her legs over the arm of the chair as her back rested against the other one.

"Look, Marie..." he started but she interrupted him with a quick whip of her head in his direction.

"Don't call me that," she said fiercely. How dare he call her by her original name. He was acting like everything should be alright. Like he hadn't hurt her so bad she contemplated suicide.

"What?" he asked with a furrow of his brow and a hurt expression flashing across his face.

"You heard me. What, Logan? Did you expect me to be thrilled to see you? That I should have run into your arms the second you walked through that door? That everything was peachy between us? Well, I've got news for you. It's not. You hurt me, Logan. You made me feel worthless, used. And I didn't need your pity. I loved you. And you 'played' along with it. Thinking it was just a crush. It was more than that for me. But apparently you couldn't see that. And those flowers? What? Yo-you thought sending those to me would make me forgive you for shredding my heart into a million different pieces? I'm sorry, but it doesn't work that way!" she screamed at him, now standing up with him still kneeling.

"I..." Logan started but Rogue put a hand up to silence him.

"Don't. Don't even try to explain yourself to me, Logan. I don't want to hear it. Nothing you say can ever make me feel the same about you as I used to. Nothing will make me forgive you. And nothing will ever, and I do mean ever, get my heart back together. I'm hollow now. And... and I don't think I can trust you. God, the one person I thought I could trust and he makes me regret it. Goodbye, Logan." Rogue walked past his form on the floor and walked out of the room, not fazed in the least by the words she had spoken to him. She should have been feeling incredibly guilty by her harsh words, but through the year they had built up and about ready to explode. She thought to herself that she should be happy he was back, that maybe, just maybe he really did love her and he came back for her. But she shook that thought from her head and decided that getting her hopes up was a dangerous thing.

Everytime I get my hopes up
They always seem to fall
Still what could've been
Is better than
What can never be at all
At all

She pushed the spoon into the soft white ice cream and dumped it into the bowl at her side. She felt the hot tears at her eyes but refused to let them fall. Having him around was harder than she thought it would be. Everytime she saw him her eyes filled with tears. But she refused to cry. She was tired of crying for him. She still didn't regret her words to him. But every now and then she wished. Wished they could still be. A part of her wanted to run to him and beg him to come back. To ask him to forget her words. But she fought back the urge. She didn't trust him. Wouldn't trust him. The one person she trusted her heart with and he mutilated it. She heard someone open the fridge behind her and then a pop of a bottle cap and she knew instantly who it was. She didn't bother to look at him. She didn't want him to see her tear stained cheeks. She didn't want to give him the pleasure of seeing her weakness. She smacked the lid of the ice cream tub on and pushed the spoon into her bowl. She threw the tub into the freezer, ignoring the fact that he was leaning against the counter inches away from her. She turned her attention back to the melting ice cream, grabbed it off the counter, and headed for the door.

"Marie." She heard him speak her name and she stopped dead in her tracks. Standing silently for a moment with her eyes closed, she decided against staying for what he wanted to say, composed herself and continued to the door. Before she could walk out she felt his hand around her clothed arm, turning her around to face him.

"Marie, please," he begged and she kept her eyes facing downwards, not wanting to look at his face. She still found it hard to believe he was here again. She thought for sure he was gone for good.

"I told you not to call me that," she whispered as tears fell down her cheeks and to the tiled floor below her feet.

"You're gonna have to deal with it, darlin'. Cause that's all I know you as," he said softly causing her eyes to fly up to his.

"What?" she asked confused.

"I've only and always known you as Marie. Not Rogue. Don't you understand?" he asked as he held her by her upper arms. She shook her head in confusion at his words.

"Do you know why I left?" he asked softly.

"Not... really," she said softly. "You left the way you always did. On a moment's notice. If that."

"I left, because Marie left," he spoke, causing Rogue's brow to furrow in confusion, "Marie was slipping away. And you were becoming more and more like Rogue. I fell in love with Marie. And it hurt me... when I couldn't find her. You had changed so much." Logan spoke and tears filled her eyes once more.

"Logan... I..." Rogue tried to explain.

"Marie, shh... listen to me. I'm sorry I hurt you. I never wanted to. But I was losing you. Losing the woman I loved," he continued.

"Logan, no. You were never losing me." Rogue tried to reassure him but he just shook his head.

"No, Marie. I was. The more people you got into that head of yours, the futher away Marie became," he replied.

Tears were now streaming down her face in waterfalls at his words. The whole time she thought it was all a game. That he hadn't really cared for her when he left suddenly. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. He closed his eyes tightly and he fought back the tears as he felt her body shudder from the sobs that escaped her lips. He never wanted to hurt her. But he was watching the woman he loved slip away out of his grasp. And not being able to bare it any longer, up and left. He ran.

"Logan... I... I still love you. I couldn't stop. Even when I tried to tell myself you used me. That you just did the things out of pity for me. But deep down inside, I couldn't stop. I couldn't stop loving you." Rogue cried into his collar as he stroked her hair.

"I never stopped, either, Marie. Nothing could make me stop loving you. But you have to understand that I left because... because you did. You left me first," he spoke as he lifted her head to look at him, using her hair as protection against her skin.

"Why? Why didn't you just talk to me?" Marie asked with a sniff.

"Because I felt the only thing that could be done was for me to run. I'm so sorry Marie. That was the reason behind the flowers. I wanted to make sure you knew that I still loved you," he answered.

"I thought they were a pity gift," Rogue said as she lowered her eyes in shame.

"I never pitied you," he replied as he took her in his embrace once again.

"I love you so much," he whispered as the tears won the battle against him, falling to her hair beneath his chin.

"And I love you," she answered as she looked back up in his eyes.

He smiled at her as he took the scarf from around her neck and covered her mouth; lowering his lips to hers and gave into the passion between them. His tongue entered her mouth through the thin fabric and held her tight to him. He smiled against her mouth as she released a small moan while her hands roamed his hair.

Could've been so beautiful
Could've been so right
Could've been my lover
Every day of my life
Could've been so beautiful
Could've been so right
You can hold what could've been
On a cold and lonely night

They lay on his bed laughing and talking. Catching up on things they missed in each other's lives and Rogue couldn't believe her luck. Just when she had given up hope, he showed up in her life once more. And she knew. She knew now he was here to stay. She had apologized profusely for the way she acted towards him upon his return and he didn't hold it against her. He said how he should have explained how he felt instead of running. And he returned the apologies for leaving her like he had. They decided to forget the past and concentrate on the matter at hand, being in each other's arms, madly in love with one another. Rogue sighed as his arm around her waist tightened while he drifted off to sleep.

Could've been so beautiful
Could've been so right
You can hold what could've been
On a cold and lonely night
Night, night, oh

How could this be? She never thought she'd be here again. In his arms. Feeling like she was the luckiest girl alive. And she knew she was. Here she was, lying in the same bed with the man she loved. Watching him sleep, looking so very peaceful. She was thinking to herself, 'how could she hold what could've been' when the thought crossed her mind that 'she held what was and would always be' her love.

How could I hold what could've been
On a cold and lonely night

The End