It's amazing
how you make your face just like a wall
how you take your heart and turn it off
how I turn my head and lose it all

I finally told Logan about how I felt when he left. Those deep down feelings that I didn't even want to admit to myself. Those feelings of abandonment that I tried my best to squelch. Those feelings that turned me towards the isolation that I forced upon myself.

It's unnerving how just one move puts me by myself
there you go just trusting someone else
now I know I put us both through hell

I hadn't wanted to tell him. I knew it would upset him. But once I started I told him everything. I told him about how I spent most of my time in his room. About how I clung to his nightmares. About how Bobby tried to be there for me.

I'm not saying
there wasn't nothing wrong
I just didn't think you'd ever get tired of me
I'm not saying
we ever had the right to hold on
I just didn't wanna let it get away from me

He doesn't like Bobby, but then Bobby doesn't like him. Hearing that Bobby tried to replace him in my life made him real mad. Then I told him about Remy too. I figured how much madder could he get? It was a lot. I had to block the door to stop him from confronting them now. I had to be kind of mean, actually. I had to remind him about how he left me. He made a choice and I was stuck with it. That I didn't begrudge him his choice, but he can't get all territorial when he chose to leave me behind.

But if that's how it's gonna leave
straight out from underneath
then we'll see who's sorry now
If that's how it's gonna stand, when
you know you've been depending on
the one you're leaving now
the one you're leaving out

I told him about how I felt like he was shutting me out. About how I clung to him in my head. How I adopted some of his mannerisms, much to the chagrin of most of the people in the mansion. I think he new some of this somehow. He didn't seemed surprised by some of what I said. He actually laughed when I told him about how I used to stalk around.

It's aggravating
how you threw me on
and you tore me out
how your good intentions turn to doubt
the way you needed time to sort it out

But then I started to cry remembering how alone I felt. I had never felt so alone. I used to be resigned to the fact that I would be alone, but then I he touched me, twice, and I had someone. It was okay to be alone when I didn't have any other options, but an entirely other thing when I could be with someone who understood. I even made him cry. I hate when I make him cry.

Tell me is that how it's going to end
when you know you've been depending on
the one you're leaving now
and the one you're leaving out