Summary: The X-men star in a popular candy commercial.
Categories: X1 Characters: None
Genres: Humor
Tags: None
Warnings: None
Challenges: Series: None
Chapters: 1
Completed: Yes
Word count: 499
Read: 1669
Published: 01/24/2004
Updated: 01/24/2004
1. How Do X-Men Eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup? by Jennie
How Do X-Men Eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup? by Jennie
Author's Notes:
I get up and eat in the middle of the night all the time. Last night, I had a Reese's peanut butter cup, and this is the result. It's just something silly, inspired by the commercials. Especially the one where the elderly couple is sitting on the couch and they ask, "How do you eat a Reese's?" And the woman, obviously annoyed with her husband, says something like, "He just nibbles and nibbles and takes his sweet time!" Then the old man turns to her and says, "You're next, my dear." That effectively shuts her up and puts a smile on her face! Dedication: For my mother, who always keeps my fridge stocked with Reese's and other goodies for my late-night grazings!
Announcer: How does Shadowcat eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?
Kitty: I phase through my Reese's, first.
Announcer: How does Beast eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?
Hank: I try to understand anything I take into my body on the molecular level before consuming it. I run several scientific tests to understand its chemical makeup, and if I can, I make notes of Kitty's observations once she has phased through a substance. Upon investigation, I think I shall try this treat. Hmmm, quite tasty, but alas, nothing compares to a Twinkie.
Announcer: How do Iceman and Pyro eat Reese's Peanut Butter Cups?
Bobby: I like to eat them ice cold.
St. John: Naw, man, they're better hot. (We see St. John holding out his hands with chocolate dripping from them.)
Announcer: How does Gambit eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?
Remy: Better watch your candy stash, chere. `Dis thief steals his treats!
Announcer: How does Jubilee eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?
Jubes: I think everything is better when it sparkles! But the important question is "where" not "how," silly. And the answer is, at the mall, of course!
Announcer: How does Storm eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?
Ororo: I enjoy curling up and watching a nice thunderstorm with an old blanket, a glass of milk, and plenty of Reese's.
Announcer: How does Dr. Grey eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?
Jean: I can move all sorts of things with my mind. (We see a peanut butter cup float through the air, the wrapper comes off of it and it slides into her open mouth.)
Announcer: How does Cyclops eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?
Scott: I guess I just eat them like most people do…. But have you ever tried to open those wrappers? I usually just blast the damn thing.
Announcer: How does Professor X eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?
Charles: Well, I put my hands on either side of it, and I say, "Just relax, I am not going to hurt you…."
Announcer: How does Rogue eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?
Marie: I like to place the peanut butter cup right in the middle of Logan's breastbone. Then I start at his belly button and make a triangular trail, as I kiss, lick, and nibble from his washboard stomach up to one nipple, across his glorious chest, eating my treat as I go, to the other nipple and back down his "treasure line" to his navel.
But, you want to know what the best part of it is? There's always two cups in a package so I get to do it all over again!
Announcer: How does Wolverine eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?
Logan: First, I undress Marie and lay her out naked on our bed. Next, I use my claws to shave the candy into tiny pieces that fall all over her body. Then, I take my time and lick it all up.
Got a problem with that, bub?
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.