Title: Body Swap
Logan hitched his bra strap up with a hiss of exasperation. Being a chick wasn’t all it was cut out to be. For a start running hurt. Well it did if you had a chest as full as his, or rather Marie’s. Damn, this was getting confusing. Of course, for the first coupla days Marie’s ample, er, curves had been a source of fascination and, let’s face it, lust. Which made him feel hellishly uncomfortable, but could he help it? He had to shower with them every morning, for Christ’s sake. When he looked down they were there, staring him in the face. They were down there now, jiggling about under the sweatshirt. No! Concentrate on the run, Logan. Focus.

“Get a move on, Rogue. You’re lagging behind here!”

Logan resisted the urge to smash his fist into Scott’s face. Nothin’ to stop him sticking his foot out as he bounded past though.

“Gee, I’m so sorry Mr Summers!” It was still strange to hear Marie’s southern drawl instead of his own voice, but this situation had it’s advantages. No one would suspect sweet little Rogue of deliberately smooshing her track coach’s face into the mud. Heh heh heh.

Seeing Jubilee and Kitty on an intercept course out the corner of his eye, Logan increased his pace, anxious to avoid a showdown. No doubt they were pissed that Marie had been ignoring them for over a week now, but that was one conversation he refused to have. Well, girls, it’s like this: Magneto zapped me and Rogue with some weird ray thing in another of his crazy ‘take over the world’ schemes, and it had one itty bitty side-effect. Now I’m her and she’s me. And Xavier better sort this the hell out before it’s that time of the month or there’ll be the world’s worse case of PMT. Nah, far better for Jubes and Kitty to think Rogue was being a bitch.

In some dark corner of his mind – or the mind he was presently occupying – Logan felt the remnants of Magneto stir at the mention of his name. Shit, that man was persistent! He screwed up his face with the effort of slapping him back into his corner, fresh admiration for Marie and all she had to cope with washing through him. The barriers she’d erected to keep the interlopers in her brain at bay worked pretty well most of the time, although the first time he’d encountered himself had been pretty freaky. Marie knew way too much about him for his own comfort. Bobby was in here somewhere too, probably whining in a corner if he knew iceboy. Now he’d figured his way around a bit better Logan liked to drop the barriers and indulge in a spot of mental violence. Nothing like giving Magneto a good kicking to brighten up the shitty situation he had left them in. Marie was tough, but he had the Wolverine to deal with now, and if there was one thing he was good at it was fighting in an enclosed space.

~*~

“So how’s it going’ kid?”

“I cut myself shaving. But it healed up pretty quick.”

“Hey, don’t mess with the sideburns, will ya? And Marie, uncross your legs for Christ’s sake.”

“Oh, sorry.”

They were sitting opposite each other in the twin room Xavier had given them to sleep in while their condition persisted. For some reason he had felt it would be unethical to allow Logan to share with Jubilee and Kitty, despite all his promises not to look or take advantage of the situation…much.

“So, you popped the claws yet?”

“Once. It hurts, Logan. I mean it really hurts. I don’t know how you can bear it.”

“Don’t worry, I’m used to it. Should be after all these years.”

“Well I’m not. I may have…cried.”

“Shit! Where were you? Tell me you weren’t in the danger room! I’m never gonna live this down.”

“I was in the kitchen. Scott walked in and , er, surprised me and yow! the claws just came out kinda instinctively. It’s okay, I told him it was the onions I was chopping.”

“Onions.” Logan shook his head, “Marie, if you make me cry in front of Scott again I’ll cut your hair off to an inch all over.”

“You wouldn’t!” she gasped.

“Try me.” It was a lie. He enjoyed waking in the night and burying his face in it too damn much, but she didn’t know that. The next second he was flat on his back with an arm across his throat.

“Cut off my hair and I’ll cut off something of yours you’ll miss far more. It’ll be an interesting wait to see if it grows back again. Got that bub?” As a threat it would have been more effective if she hadn’t started laughing. The arm cutting off his air supply slackened it’s hold and with an effort he hefted her off to the side, her body helpless with mirth.

“Christ, Marie! The Wolverine doesn’t giggle, okay? No giggling, blubbing, crossing your legs, shaving under the arms or highlighting the hair, got it?”

“You can try and sound tough if you want, but you still look and sound like a girl, Logan,” Marie managed to gasp, “and if you keep scowling like that you’ll give me premature wrinkles.”

“So what did Xavier have to say while I was out for my run? Tell me he’s cooked up some plan for reversing that ray, ’cause I’m getting desperate here.”

Marie sobered instantly and cocked her head to one side, regarding him questioningly. “Is it that bad being me?”

Yipes! What could he say? He hadn’t realised just how much it would affect him, not being able to touch anybody. Okay, so he wasn’t particularly touchy-feely anyway, but to see people actually move away when he came close, to feel them flinch in fear if he accidentally brushed against them…it made him feel like a goddamn leper. The clothes that covered every exposed piece of flesh seemed to suffocate him, but worse than all that was the frustration. He could go for months without sex if he had to; he didn’t have to like it, but it was possible. But knowing that he couldn’t have sex even if he did want to, that was pure torture. He was about ready to climb the walls here, and even the trusty old right hand was at a loss with this new body. So what could he say to her? Yep, it’s a piece of crap being you, gimme my body back?

“No, kid, it’s not that bad being you. Just seems like it would be best for everyone to get back to normal as quickly as possible. We’ve got the world to save, after all.”

She gave him a smile that didn’t touch her eyes and nodded. “Well, the Professor thinks this’ll just wear off. From the analysis they’ve done on the fragments of the machine they recovered he thinks this is a temporary thing. Obviously Magneto didn’t plan this, he just wanted to kill us.”

“Good ol’ Magneto, huh?”

“Yeah, bless him. So we’ve just gotta sit tight and get through it. Apparently we could just switch back any moment.”

“Right.” Logan sighed and stood up, “Well, It’s my turn in the bathroom, so I’d better make the most of the chances I have left to ogle this body.” Instead of laughing as he’d expected her to he watched in consternation as Marie blushed rosily. “Hey, it was a joke. And add no blushing to that list I gave you.”

He made his way into the bathroom and shut the door thankfully, leaning back against the cool wood. So it had only partly been a joke. Much as he hated to admit it, the more time he spent with this body the more fascinated by it he became. He moved in front of the mirror and slowly began to shed his clothes, starting with the gloves. Man, he hated those gloves. Nothing felt right through the material, thin as it was. When he had removed every single stitch he simply stood and gazed in the mirror. Naked, Marie took his breath away. It seemed a sin to cover a body so beautiful from head to toe. Her skin was so pale it was almost luminous, and only when his head began to spin with lust did he force his eyes away from the mirror and down to the basin. With an effort of will he turned the taps on and washed perfunctorily, not letting his hands rest for too long on any particular part. He would get through this. He would. If he didn’t go mad first.

A hesitant tapping on the door startled him out of his reverie, and he flung a towel round his waist and yanked the door open.

“What is it?”

“Logan, I have a bit of a problem here and…er, you may want to pull that towel up a bit.”

He looked down and cursed, rearranging the towel rapidly. “Sorry, force of habit. So what’s the problem?”

“It won’t go down!”

“What won’t go down?”

Her eyebrow shot up sardonically, and she made an impatient gesture towards her jeans. “It won’t go down. Jesus, this is so embarrassing.”

“Logan followed her eyes down and whistled. “Holy crap, what were you thinking about?” A thought occurred to him and he frowned, “Tell me it wasn’t popsicle boy.”

“Bobby? Why would I be thinking about him? Anyway, what does it matter what I was thinking about, the point is that I seem to be stuck like this. You’re a man, Logan. Well…most of the time. How do I get it to go down?”

“Let’s start with the obvious. Have you tried thinkin’ about something else instead?”

“Like what?”

“Try, er, Scott. That should do the trick. Always works for me.”

They both stared downwards for a couple of minutes. Finally Marie cleared her throat and said, “Obviously you dislike Mr Summers more than I do.”

“Point taken.” The urge to smash his fist into Scott’s face returned with a vengeance. “How about Magneto.” He paused for effect. “Naked.”

“Oh yeah, that seems to be doin’ the trick,” she announced, her voice full of relief.

“Magneto naked in a posing pouch.”

“Euww, gross! What’re ya tryin’ to do to me?”

Logan turned away to hide his smirk. “That should calm things down in there.”

“It may never recover,” she muttered, still staring at her pants dubiously. “Logan, how do you cope with this kinda thing goin’ on? I mean the peeing is fine. I could get used to peeing standing up real quick. But when I wake up in the morning it’s just there, waving hello at me.”

“Hey, it’s just part of the burden of being a guy I guess. You women don’t know how easy you have it.”

Marie narrowed her eyes at him. Coming from his face it looked quite fierce. “I hope you’ve been shaving my legs!”

Logan realised his mouth was hanging open and shut it with a snap. “I’ve been enjoying not shaving anythin’ for a change.”

“You mean you haven’t…not at all…? Are you trying to change me into the yeti woman?”

He was annoyed to feel a blush stealing up his own face. “You look fine, darlin’.” Better than fine, he added mentally, remembering the image in the mirror with sudden startling clarity. It was just as well women didn’t get erections. “Gotta go, see you later.” Ignoring her look of puzzlement he hightailed it out the room. He needed to think and he needed a beer. Everything else he needed would have to wait for now.

~*~

“Another beer,” Logan demanded, waving the empty bottle at the bartender. The man glanced pointedly at the other empties littering the bar in front of the girl in the long leather jacket and raised an eyebrow. The glare he received in reply made him think twice about arguing. She may only have been a slip of a thing but something about her made him uneasy. He popped another bottle and plunked it in front of her, merely muttering, “You’ve had quite a few. Bad day?”

“Y’could say that,” the girl drawled, downing half the beer in one swallow, “but it’s getting better every second.”

“I can help you with that, honey,” a male voice broke in. A greasy-looking man in a denim jacket took the stool next to her and laid one nicotine-stained hand on her arm. “Why don’t ya come home with me, sweet thing? We can have ourselves one hell of a party.”

“I don’t think so,” Logan replied, “and you really don’t want to be layin’ a hand on me.”

The grip on his arm tightened unpleasantly. “Now don’t be difficult, cutie. My truck’s out back, and I’ve a feelin’ you’ll be hitchin’ a lift real soon.”

A metallic snick behind them made the man turn. When he saw the guy waiting behind him he went pale, and that was before his brain processed the blades protruding from the raised fist.

“Beat it, bub, before I start to get annoyed,” Marie growled. Logan shook his head as if to clear it and grinned up at her.

“Did you just growl or did I imagine it?”

“You’re drunk.” She sounded pissed off. “Come on, let’s get you outta here.”

Pushing past the man at the bar, who seemed to be frozen to his stool with shock, Marie hustled Logan out into the fresh evening air, snapping the claws back into her hand and wincing. “Fuck! That hurt.”

“I could have handled him. Coulda zapped him with my poison skin.”

“Yeah, and then I would have had that creep rattling around inside my head for the rest of my life. Cool plan.”

“Oh.” He tried to sound remorseful, and failed dismally if her expression was anything to go on.

“Tell me I don’t have to carry you back to the mansion,” she groaned as he sagged against her.

“I can walk fine!” He proved it by careering into a trash can. For some reason everything was blurred and moving about. She sighed and hefted him into her arms, carrying him effortlessly to the motorbike she’d left parked in an alley. Logan liked being so close to her, even if the alpha male in him howled in protest at being carried like a baby.

“Your stubble is all scratchy,” he murmured, unable to resist the sudden urge to run his lips along her jawline. When she froze he laid his lips against hers, holding them there for endless seconds.

“Logan, stop! This is just too weird, okay? I feel like I’m kissing myself.”

“Don’t wanna stop.”

“Lucky that I’m stronger than you, then.” Quickly she lifted him onto the front of the bike and climbed on behind him. “Now be a good girl and sit still, and we’ll have you home in no time.”

“S’not fair,” he whined, flopping forward until his head was resting on the handlebars. “I just wanted a kiss.”

“Jesus, Logan! You sound about twelve.” Marie started the bike and pulled away with a roar. Somewhere in the recesses of his mind Logan was aware that something strange was going on, but it seemed easier to go to sleep. Thinking hurt his head.

~*~

Logan staggered slowly into the kitchen the next morning, clutching his head. Marie and Scott were already there, and he tried to ignore the baleful look she was giving him. Fortunately Scott had no idea about the true nature of the situation – Logan had insisted on that. He guessed that Marie was just dying to chew him out, and he took advantage of Scott’s presence to grab some coffee and collapse in one of the wooden chairs.

“Are you alright, Rogue?” Scott asked anxiously, “You look a little pale.”

“Just a headache, Mr Summers. I’ll be fine.”

“Well, if you don’t feel up to the run today you let me know.”

“Gee, thanks,” Logan batted his eyelashes, enjoying the murderous look on Marie’s face, “I really don’t think I could manage it somehow. You’re so kind. I dreamt about you last night.”

“Y-you did?” Scott began backing out of the room, his face red and flustered. “That’s nice. Hey, Logan, give me a hand with that bike later, okay?”

“Sure thing. I’ll just have a quick word with Rogue first.” Scott was gone, and Marie settled herself opposite Logan. “You see this fork, Logan? As soon as I get my body back I’m going to stick it in your leg.”

He grinned at her over his mug of coffee. “I figure this situation has to have some compensations.” He placed the mug carefully on the table and leaned forward. “Kiss me.”

“What?” He had the satisfaction of seeing her blink in shock.

“Give me a kiss. It’s a little experiment.” He stood up from the table and began to make his way round to her. She got up clumsily and backed off, brandishing the fork in front of her.

“Uh uh. No way. What’s the matter, are you still drunk?”

“Just one little kiss, darlin’. There’s no need to run away!” She jabbed at him with the fork and he held his hands up in surrender, plopping back into a chair. “When I woke up I finally realised what was so strange last night.”

“Aside from coming onto yourself, you mean?”

“Marie, if I really wanted to kiss you a bit of cutlery wouldn’t stop me,” he snapped, scowling at the fork in her hand. “The point is, when I kissed you last night nothing happened. No life-draining sucky mutant power. Nothin’.”

She paused, paling as the implications of what he was suggesting hit her. “You may be right…I don’t remember feeling anything bad when you kissed me.”

“It was all good, huh?” She shot him an exasperated look and he grinned. “Take my hand,” he urged, stretching his out to her.

He could tell that she was scared, not a look that appeared often on the Wolverine’s face, but she cautiously held her own hand out, brushing his fingers lightly with hers. Her skin was rough against his, and the gentle contact tautened every nerve in his body. Seizing the opportunity he grabbed her hand, holding it within both of his and squeezing tightly, willing her powers not to take effect. After what seemed a lifetime she gave a choky laugh, raising eyes brimming with tears to his own.

“I can touch you, Logan! I can really touch you! But I don’t understand why…”

“Hell, don’t worry about that, darlin’! Worry about what I’m going to do if you start blubbin’ again.”

She laughed, wiping her eyes. “So you gonna give me a proper hug, now?”

“You try and stop me, darlin’.”

And it was at that precise moment that the effect of Magneto’s ray wore off.

~*~

When Logan finally came to the kitchen was deserted. He picked himself up from where he had been sprawled on the floor, his body feeling unaccountably heavy, but when he looked down he encountered jeans and a white T-shirt instead of the embroidered top and long gloves he distinctly remembered putting on that morning.

“Fuck.”

He burst from the kitchen, nearly flattening Storm who was on the other side of the door, and ran down the hall and up the stairs to the room he and Marie had been sharing lately. The door was locked but was no match for the weight of adamantium flung at it, and he shouldered it aside, moving quickly across to where Marie was lying on her bed, her shoulders shaking with anguish. Tentatively he stroked one hand over her back, but she shrank away from him.

“Stay away from me, Logan. I’m dangerous.” The misery in her voice made him clench his jaw, but he gently continued to soothe her.

“I’m afraid I can’t stay away from you, kid. I don’t care how poisonous your skin is, I’m going to be right here every time you turn round.”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” she cried, turning over to look up at him. “Just when I thought that I could finally touch someone, even if I was trapped in a different body, and then…then it’s all taken away from me. Is Magneto trying to torture me? It sure feels that way.”

“Are you even sure your powers still work? They didn’t before.”

“I bumped into Storm on the stairs and accidentally zapped her. I may have made it rain on your bed. I’m sorry.”

“It’s just not Storm’s day,” Logan quipped, but inwardly he couldn’t prevent the surge of powerlessness and frustration that swept through him. He’d been hoping so badly that things would work out for her. The sorrow in her expression hardened his resolve, however. He would make this work somehow, even if he had to spend the rest of his days in the medlab. Gently he smoothed the hair back from her face, still wet with tears, then deliberately covered her mouth with his own. Blindly allowing all the pent-up love and desire he felt for her full reign, he swept his tongue into her mouth, screwing his eyes shut and waiting for the painful tug of her mutation to kick in. Then he waited a bit longer. By the time he realised that nothing was ever going to happen Marie was returning his kiss wildly, her arms encircling his neck and her body pressing eagerly against him.

He muttered something against her lips, holding her even more tightly and savouring the satisfaction of finally having her in his arms, before reluctantly pulling away to look down at her. She moaned at the loss of contact, her eyes glazed with desire, and he had to shake her several times to get her full attention.

“Marie! Marie, listen to me for chrissakes!”

“What is it?” She sounded annoyed and he grinned.

“Can’t get enough of me, huh? That’s probably just as well, ’cause it looks as though you’re stuck with me, seeing as how I’m the only person in the world you can touch.”

“How d’ya work that one out?”

“The way I see it, your body’s already absorbed as much of me as it can. Hell, I was you. There’s only so much Logan one girl can take.” The grin had become a full-on smirk now.

“I’m sure the Professor could explain it better,” she replied, her mouth quirking as a new thought struck her, “So does this mean I should actually be thanking Magneto?”

“I guess so.” His gaze was drawn to the heaving of her chest, and he slid one hand beneath the cotton top she wore, smiling at her shocked whimper. “I’m feeling pretty thankful just now.”

He began to remove her clothes hastily, suddenly impatient to taste and explore every inch of the flesh he had seen in that damned mirror. She writhed helplessly as his hands swept demandingly over the planes of her body, the sensation of her soft flesh against his making his breath hiss between his teeth.

“I definitely prefer your body with you in it,” he growled, pinning her arms above her head with one hand while the other continued its erotic exploration. “But just so we’re clear, there’ll be no more dreamin’ about Scott, okay?”

“Okay, Logan. Whatever you say, just don’t stop!”

He had no intention of stopping: not ever.






The End