“Hey, kid.”

“Logan! Thank God you’re here!”

“Yeah, I heard about your back. You know, you’re suppose to stretch before hand. Maybe I ain‘t the one who‘s 150 around here?”

“Ha ha. If I could move I’d throw something at you.”

“Sorry, darlin’. It hurt real bad?”

“Yes. It hurt real bad. Now get your super-healing ass over here and let me barrow some.”

“Oh, no. I was strictly told no touching unless you’re dying. Jeanie would rip me a new one if she found out. Besides, I don‘t see the point of BOTH of us being in pain.”

“Oh I do. Do you think I give a shit about what Jean says? You’re not going to just let me lie here in pain are you? Hank said it could be days. Were talking the full 15 day disabled list. You don’t want me hurting for three weeks do you?”

“You just put that pout of yours away, kid, I promised I wouldn’t.”

“But you promised you’d take care of me *first*!”

“You’re right. And I’m real sorry. Anything you need just tell me and I’ll be more than happy to get it for you.”

“You know what I could really use? A mutant with super-healing abilities who ISN’T a pussy.”

“Watch your mouth, Marie.”

“What can I say? It’s the pain talking. Please, Logan, I’m miserable.”

“How about one of them heating pad things? I hear they work pretty good.”

“Wow, that’s a good idea. I also hear having a regenerative mutation works wonders.”

“Stop it. I’m not touching you. You got any of those things around here?”

“Yeah, there’s one right beside my bed, but he’s being a real prick for some reason.”

“Cut it out, Marie or I’m leaving and you can lay here by yourself.”

“Fine. Check the cabinet under the sink in the bathroom.”

“Let me guess. Behind the all the pads and tampons?”

“You got it, sugah.”

“The things I do for you.”

“Oh yeah. Because having your arm near female products is such a sacrifice. It’s worse then, say, giving up a little bit of your healing for a friend in agony.”

“Seriously, I will leave.”

“Just putting it into context.”

“Right. Alright. You’re gonna have to roll over, darlin’ for me to put this on.”

….

“Roll over? You don’t seem to understand what’s going on here. There is no rolling over, Logan.”

“Ain’t any other way to get it on there. Come on, I’ll help. Real slow now, that’s it--”

“Oh, fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck! Sadist asshole!”

“Sorry, darlin’, it’s over now. Your lower back, right?”

“Yes. Oh, fuck that’s cold.”

“Says it’ll get hot in a second or two.”

“I’m familiar with the product Logan. Oh, shit, Jesus in heaven give me strength.”

“I never took you for much of a prayer, kid.”

“Well, who the fuck else am I suppose to turn to? You’re completely useless.”

“I promise the next time I accidentally stab you or something you can take extra. Now come on, you gotta roll back over.”

“Oh, consider yourself a dead man.”

“Have for a long time, darlin’. Nice and careful…. See? Now wasn’t that a little easier with that thing on your back?”

“No. I think I might cry.”

“Shit, that bad? Alright, that’s it. I’m gonna go get Hank and make him give you some of those hardcore pills.”

“Logan?”

“Yeah?”

“Before you go could you fluff my pillow a little bit?”

“Sure, kid. No problem.”

“AHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!”

“Don’t scream so much, Jean will hear you. God, that feels so much better. Thanks, sugah.”

“Fuck, Marie, you can’t just take it like that! Oh, fuck, I think I’m going to throw up.”

“Oh, don’t be such a baby, I just took a little bit. You’re still conscious.”

“That’s more than I can say for you the minute I can stand again.”

“Catch me if you can, sugah. Catch me if you can.”