I think Rogue is purposely pushing Logan away and for me it's not fair (not because this is WRFA but because I do treat story like they're real life) when she lets Gambit in.

And I know that she owes Gambit for saving her but she also owes Logan because Logan has save her too long time ago albeit reluctantly. For her to push him away like that when she has so much too tell him it's not fair.

And I see a pattern in herself, push away people when they got too close but I can help but feel that she's slowly falling for Gambit (even if she's denied it) and she feels guilty towards Logan, from all the secrets that's not her to be kept.

It's hard for me to read a very non-traditional love story because this my friend feels like real life. The choices and consequences. The "I don't want to deal with that now" attitude. It all fits nicely and I feel very uneasy, like having this heavy feeling inside me (because yes, I'm rooting for Logan) uneasy because like I said before I'm constantly worried what would happen to them in the end because I think you won't give us the definite ending. :)

TL;DR - This chapter is a one giant mess of emotions for Rogue and I loved it!

- alia

Author's Response: Thank you for your very in-depth response! I am definitely interested in all the ways in which we are not necessarily "fair" to each other, all the ways in which we fail to be fair to others, especially those we care for, to whom I think we can often be the least "fair." That said, I don't know that I agree that Rogue spends time with Gambit because she "owes" him for saving her, and I definitely don't think she "owes" Logan for saving her. And I think the Logan in this story would be even more adamantly opposed to that suggestion; he's not the kind of character that exerts debts over people for the sacrifices he chooses to make--and he definitely didn't save her reluctantly! Which is what's interesting, how unreluctant his actions were. And yes, the Rogue in this story certainly makes arguments "against intimacy." But I think what primarily interests me here is the question of how does the act of knowing someone affect us, undo us; and is it ever possible to un-know things. Finally--thank you so much again for reading this non-traditional story (it's all in the title!) and sharing your wonderful impressions. It might sound odd, but I'm very delighted that you feel so uneasy and worried; must mean something's going right. ;)

“I don’t love anything” then why is she so intent on protecting Logan at all costs? She’s struggling with him, he’s the difficult one, makes her uneasy and offbalance she’s far more comfortable with Remy at the moment but he’s now coming across as just the easy option, and I’m looking forward to the shit hitting the fan and getting deeper into the Logan/Rogue side of things.

There’s such a sadness underneath all this, she’s really trying hard to convince herself that she’s happy, pretending to see everyone else as happy too. She knows the truth but refuses to acknowledge it (yet!) and ok so they’re well hidden and hinted at very few and far between but you’re beginning to show the cracks in the emotionless machine!

It will all end in tears but whose? Now that is the question.

Author's Response: Thank you for this detailed response! I know; my attempt at a light series--FAIL. What was I thinking? But I really can't hold back my dominant concerns with these two characters: like how do we know people, and how can we never know people; how can we help people, how can we not help people. And it's interesting for me to see that dynamic played out not only between the two of them, but with outside elements, especially since in the films we're often shown how the two of them are at once totally in their own world--and then again, living totally separate lives from each other and involved with other people. I like thinking about that kind of fluctuating distance, and how that relationship could really be lived, especially after the events of X3. And while the "Rogue doesn't let herself get near people, SADNESS!" is probably the most clichéd trope in the X-Men universe, exploring its possibilities is still always fun. Thanks again for this lovely and thoughtful response. :)

i loooove the line where the only thing she knows is that the tears on her face on hers...and nothing else about her is her own at the very moment.

and..."Nothing but an amazing fuck, eager fingers, a nimble tongue."

yeh, keep telling yourself that Rogue.

i'm glad you gave us a chapter in which you give Rogue's P.O.V. not so much how she got her powers (which is great BTW! ooohh Silver Samurai!) but how she thinks, why she does what she does, what she's denying her mind and heart even when she doesn't deny her body.

Author's Response: I feel like you're going to get tired of hearing me say thank you! But thank you for sharing your individual line observations, as well, I always love to hear what specifically readers responded to.

This is really compelling writing. This story has been haunting me, that's for sure. I have to say that I agree with Dancing Donut, that it puts me on edge too. I can't shake the bad feelng that this is not going to end well for Logan at all. But despite my feeling of unease, I am totally sucked in by your story. I can't wait so see how it all plays out.

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this amazing comment. To hear that someone has been haunted by this story is a massive compliment, and pretty much exactly what I as a writer wish for; not to mention that the concept of "haunting" is a pretty major thread throughout all my writing in the first place. And as I wrote to Dancing Donut, being "on edge" and feelings of "unease" are pretty much exactly the reader responses I hope for... well, it's how I myself like best to respond to writing, in any case. :)

ooooh getting darker, love it.

i kinda like this brassy sorta mean and definitely in charge Rogue! the helpless innocent damsel stories are nice but i do get tired of the innocent girl/dirty older man Rogan.

but i have a sneaky feeling things are going to bad quickly, this is all just a little too comfortable for Rogue right now. *rubs hands together gleefully*

Author's Response: Haha, thank you for the play-by-play series of comments! I'll try to respond to each one separately. As for this one: yes, I think it's safe for me to say that I have absolutely zero interest in the innocent girl/dirty older man dynamic between these two. While one should never say never, I don't think that particulary characterization will ever be popping up around these parts, in this story or in future others. :)

Loved this line: "Instead he only looks at her with some mixture of tortured uncertainty and poorly concealed lust; and she doesn’t mind the first, as long as she can have the second, a little less concealed."

This one too: "What age has given her is the realization that every death is a different world; every loss a loss like never before."

This story is really growing on me because of how well it's written. If I had such a good grip on the English language that you have, maybe I'd be more able to tell you just how great I think your writing is :)

Author's Response: I really appreciate your line-by-line observations about what you responded to in the writing... and believe me, your grip on the English language, as evidenced by your lovely and thoughtful comments, has more than managed to make this little writer very happy. :) Thanks again for reading.

more please!

loved it

Author's Response: Thanks!

So Rogue got her powers from Carol Danvers.

Author's Response: Yes--though she's never named in the story, and has been turned into an anonymous Harada henchwoman.

A very well written story... There's the amazing slow build of Logan loving having a simple relationship of just sex, toward the realization of something that is still unspoken in your text. I love that Rogue is so much more than a easy slut. Something has made her broken and detached from anyone and it's possible that it's because of her ability that's she's so emotionally unconnected. The character tilts are fantastic and I love the no nonsense in your writing. Keep up the good work! I can't wait to read more.

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this wonderful and detailed comment. About Rogue, yes--or, rather, than being "more" than an easy slut, I also like the idea that there can be some depth to the actual decision to be only an "easy slut," in the first place. The idea of how one chooses to live inside one's body. And thanks for the comment about the no-nonsense! What a great compliment. Thanks for reading!

Whew. This one just kind of grips you. I've gotta wonder if she's just using Gambit, or if she's using Logan, or what. Driving me just a tiny bit crazy.

Author's Response: Haha, thank you. I never know what to say in the comments when people wonder aloud what's happening! :) As a writer and a reader, I don't really ever care about "spoiling" plot points (since I'm only distantly acquainted with the notion of plot points anyway, haha), or having them "spoiled" for me, so I tend to just divulge details on what's going on, if I think it serves them better as readers. I'm trying to keep myself from doing it for this story, though. :) But thank you for reading!

I registered just so that I can tell you how fantastic your writing is, and how much I have loved reading all three stories that you have posted so far. Your characterization is wonderful, and your prose is incredibly crisp and clear and beautiful.

Author's Response: I can't thank you enough for this kind and thoughtful comment; I'm extremely moved. (Especially as someone who hates registering for anything myself and avoids it wherever possible.) I'm so happy you've responded to the writing. Thank you so, so much.