Oh mwhrrlglb.... wohaammmbl...

No. Feedback. This definitely gets proper FB, never mind the dinner blackening quietly.

Will you forgive me for saying that the fic seemed to me to start a little like a run-off-the-mill high-school fantasy?

And then it goes and becomes completely hot and totally un-trite. Logan is resigned and accepting, and you keep it credible without ever falling for the (to me rather lame) image of an experienced guy who can't hold his horses because the girl is so hot. (She might be, but this is not about a perfect ass alone.)
And the claws... wow! Erotic? SO yes! Has he ever explored that potential before, I wonder? He might have - no drama there, just assertive sexuality... and reverence for her, no less. From that she should have know he wouldn't have any second thoughts about her "category" - he certainly takes her very seriously as a woman. No better indicator than that he actually teases her a little, perfectly secure in the knowledge that she has passed that stage: "You have a thing for my claws, little girl?"

Great how the tension and closeness of the one very hot shower scene is relieved (before it becomes tediously over-heated) by giving us the next step in retrospect through Marie's POV and her musings on her emotions and consequences - the narrative manages to balance perfectly between delightful smut and deep emotion (in real life, one of the trademarks of a good strong love).

And then the whole wonderful, well-seasoned mix that gives the writing such a true ring: She isn't so overly ecstatic that she cannot notice how uncomfortable she is on her knees, the revelation it is to her (despite all the second-hand memories she has) that passion has a life of its own and can drive you beyond mere likes and dislikes ("And then there was that weird thing with your cum, she added mentally. What was that about, Mother Nature?") I also note with satisfaction that she has quickly grasped what to say and what to keep silent about - clever girl!

Her introspection nicely lightened by a spicy sense of humour: "sometimes she seemed to be channelling Mother Nature"; "Was it polite for the newly de-virgined to ask?"

Glad how you weave his experienced attitude, so sure of what to do and when, together with her bright, brave charting of new territory (loved the detail about her buying condoms... and then forgetting all about them until much too later). And though she is less experienced, she is not the weaker partner (THANKS for that, well done!), as clearly shows when the whole scene darkens gently into a view of his self-perception. She might be new to the game, and still very young, but they can indeed be partners. She's wise enough for that, wiser than him maybe.
Riding into war? Yes, and I hope for them they realise it's not against each other. If they manage to become comrades in arms, they can make it.

And how wonderful that you don't stop here, when so many shippers would just insert an "and they lived happily ever after"!

(For restless youngsters, please allow me to point out the follwoing website to you: http://www.lullabies.co.uk/
I'm only having your baby's welfare in mind, of course. It's not like I have this urgent desire to shake the PC in the hope another, as yet hidden chapter will fall out. No.)

Author's Response: Wow. GREAT feedback. Take a step into the Gamma hall of fame!!!! rnrnI'm glad you picked up on the high school fantasy aspect. That was intentional: I've never actually written a story where Teenage Marie gets Logan. I loved reading about it, like anyone, but my poor, adult-feminist-mother brain needed to find some serious justification before I put the two together. (She was still young in The Bargain, but that was FAR from realistic, and in the end, it wasn't Marie that got Logan.) This is my attempt to approach Marie-Logan without my Wolverine/Rogue alterego fixation, and without the Lolita elements.rnrnI wanted it to be as "real" as possible; none of the romance novel fadeouts, or the porny "they had teh sex in 56 ways her first time evah". And I like to think Marie, in particular, is adult enough to be able to laugh at the ridiculousness of life at times.rnrnRe youngsters, I'm in heaven today. My eldest has been taken to the museum by my very brave sister in law, and the youngest is asleep. BLISS! (And a bit of charcoal in the dinner never hurt, either.) rn

Wow! Glad you updated this one! Please, please give us the next chapter! Can't wait. Going into my fav's list!

Author's Response: Working on it now, I promise! Thank you!